"Shut up, Jess."
"You wanna hit something?" she asked. "Do you want to hit me?"
"Jessica," I said in warning, and took a step away from her.
Her eyes were bright with excitement. "What does it feel like? Is it scary or thrill-"
"I said shut up!"
Jessica jumped at the sudden boom of my voice, but quickly broke into soft, melodic laughter-as if I were a child and she thought I was being amusing. She swayed side to side a few times, then turned in a slow, graceful circle. "G.o.d, you"re too easy. You want something to eat?"
I shut my eyes when she turned to look in the pantry, and took calming breaths. Through clenched teeth, I said, "You have an hour before you have to be out of here. Get some food in you, and then get out. You know when you can come back."
She giggled again, but it ended in a disappointed sound when I began walking toward the patio to go smoke. "Aw, there goes Jentry. Running away again."
I faltered, and my eyes darted to hers. "I"m not the one who ran, and continues to," I reminded her coldly.
"You can"t run from you!" she called out. "It"s inside you!"
The last thing I heard before I slammed the door shut was her giggling.
Aurora
I blew out a slow breath as I made my way back to the apartment after finishing up coffee with Taylor. She had taken me to pick up my car at the shop, and as soon as I changed into something more comfortable and grabbed one of my books, I planned on going to hang out with Declan.
I looked curiously at Jentry"s car in the parking lot one last time before deciding that I didn"t care anymore.
Whatever the reason he had wanted me to stay at the Veils" house, he couldn"t have actually expected me to, and I had stayed out long enough anyway.
Besides, it was my apartment.
I shifted my keys in my hands until I found the right one as I neared the door, but when I was still about six feet away it opened suddenly.
I took in a steadying breath, trying to prepare myself for seeing him again, but the breath got caught in my throat, my eyes widened and steps slowed when a tall brunette walked out of my apartment instead.
"Try not to miss me too much!" she called over her shoulder into the apartment just before she pulled the door shut behind her, a teasing smile playing on her mouth for the briefest of moments.
She dripped s.e.x; there was no other way to describe her, from her full lips, to her dark, seductive eyes, to the clothes that accentuated her tiny waist and curves I would die for.
For the first time in years, I suddenly felt inadequate. Linda"s words were all I could hear. I looked like a boy, I was gaining weight, I wasn"t pretty, I would never be enough. Right now I felt like every one of those things.
Because of this stranger. Because of a girl who looked too beautiful to be real. Because I"d allowed Jentry to tell me what I now a.s.sumed were heady lies when he was with girls like this moments after.
Jealousy flared in my stomach and quickly spread through my body at the thought of this girl having a glimpse of the Jentry who haunted me in everything I did. Flashes from our kiss just a couple of hours before, and from our night together a year earlier, a.s.saulted me, and the jealousy grew stronger and stronger.
The girl glanced up and caught me staring, and I had the oddest feeling that she expected to see me. One perfectly groomed eyebrow rose, and her mouth pulled up into a knowing smirk as she came closer.
Her lips twisted as she whispered, "One girl leaves, another one enters, and all the while, poor little Declan lies alone in his bed. What will the neighbors think?"
Her eyes never left mine as she shouldered past me.
I stood still for a few moments before I could gather myself enough to move again. Jealousy and confusion and self-doubt weighed down each step as I forced myself to the door and shoved it open. When my phone rang, I considered letting it go but habit took over and I had my phone at my ear just as Jentry appeared at the entrance of the hall.
My chest felt heavy and pained as I turned to avoid his hopeful stare.
"Yeah?" I spoke into the phone through clenched teeth, then froze when Kurt"s frantic voice filled the other end.
"He"s moving! He"s moving, Rorie! We need to get-his fingers! He"s moving them!"
My head snapped up and I turned to face Jentry. His hopeful expression had drained as he absorbed the tension radiating from me.
"He isn"t awake, but he"s moving. We"ll meet you at the hospital."
"W-we"ll be right there," I whispered to Kurt, and then hung up the phone. The brunette and Jentry"s betrayal faded from my mind as I relayed the message. My tone was soft and hesitant as shock and disbelief filled me. "He hasn"t woken up yet, but he"s moving his fingers."
Jentry didn"t hesitate. Within seconds, he was sweeping me out of the apartment and putting me in his car.
We didn"t say a word to each other as he sped through the streets. The air in the car was too heavy with a nervous excitement and pressure of the unknown to do so. All thoughts were now on Declan, and what would happen now.
Before this, doctors hadn"t been giving us much hope-not that Linda had ever listened to a word they"d said. But just moving his fingers was a huge improvement.
Now if only he would wake up.
Jentry and I were yelled at as we ran through the halls of the hospital on the way to Declan"s room, and found the room much like we usually did. One of the nurses was sitting by his bed talking slowly to him; she smiled up at us when we came in, then resumed her work.
"Declan, can you move your fingers again? Any of your fingers?" she asked him.
After a few seconds of staring at them, she turned to face us. "I"ve been asking for specific ones, but he doesn"t seem to be responding to that just yet."
I was frozen in place, still staring at Declan"s seemingly lifeless hand, willing it to move.
"Has he been moving in response to you?" Jentry asked when I didn"t say anything.
The nurse shook her head. "I don"t think so, but this is a great improvement."
I inhaled quickly and reached out to grab Jentry"s arm when Declan"s fingers slowly curled and then straightened again. "Declan?" I asked shakily.
The nurse stood and excused herself, but I wasn"t paying attention to her. As I took hesitant steps closer to the bed, my eyes were darting all over Declan"s body to see if he was moving anything else.
"Dec?" I whispered when I took her seat. "Declan, can you hear me?"
I slipped my hand underneath his and squeezed gently, and waited without breathing to see if there would be any kind of response.
Jentry walked around to the other side of the bed and studied Declan"s face intently. "Dec, can you move something?" He waited a while, then said softly, "I bet hearing my voice makes you want to wake up and beat the s.h.i.t out of me, huh?"
Despite everything, I laughed.
When minutes pa.s.sed without anything from Declan, I ran the fingers of my free hand along his forehead and whispered, "Where are you, Dec?"
A strained sob tore from my throat, and tears instantly fell from my eyes when two of Declan"s fingers curled against mine.
I leaned forward to rest my head against his shoulder, and let my tears bleed into the hospital gown. "I"m sorry. I"m so sorry," I whispered over and over again. "I"m sorry for everything, just come back. Find your way back," I pleaded, and squeezed his hand again.
Jentry and I took turns trying to talk to Declan over the next few minutes, but he didn"t move again.
"Where are you?" I asked softly, and looked up into Declan"s pale face. "Where did you go, and how can we get you back? We all need you back."
I glanced up at Jentry when the room suddenly felt thick with tension, and noticed his rigid stance, as if he were preparing himself for a fight. But before I could turn to look at whatever he was staring at behind me, I heard multiple people shuffling into the room, and a fake, startled gasp.
I straightened in my chair and turned in time to see Linda clutching her chest, looking at me in horror. Declan"s dad, sisters, and their husbands were spreading into the room-as was Madeline.
"Sweet girl," Linda drawled, "it is not appropriate to be that close to my son when he can"t even tell you what time of day it is; and it is definitely not appropriate to act in such a way in front of company."
Kurt ignored his wife"s absurd comment and stepped closer to get an update from Jentry on what had happened since we"d arrived.
"What took you so long to get here, and why is Madeline here?" Jentry demanded in a low tone.
Kurt gave him a helpless look and shrugged. "Your mother invited her, and we had all those people in our house; we had to wait for them to leave before we could."
I would have left without another thought, exactly the way Jentry and I had, even if people had been in my apartment. It didn"t matter that Declan hadn"t woken up yet. There had been a response from him after nothing for three weeks, and that knowledge had made the short drive to the hospital feel like it took ages.
When the only change from their son before today had been a very slow, subtle decline, I was disappointed in Declan"s family-but Kurt especially-that they would allow something like people and a party hinder them from getting to Declan.
A quick glimpse at Jentry"s face confirmed he shared my frustration with them.
"Okay now, it"s polite to give up your seat," Linda said pointedly as she stepped closer to where I was seated next to Declan.
I stood up and moved aside without hesitation, thinking she would sit down, and knowing that she should have that time with Declan even though just being near her again set me on edge. . . .
I hadn"t expected her to hold out the chair and turn to Madeline.
"Honey, I"m sure he wants to hear your voice." Linda held out her hand toward Madeline, who strode across the room. "I wouldn"t be surprised if he even opened his eyes just so he could see you." Even though her last words were clearly meant to be a whisper, she hadn"t tried hard enough to make sure that the rest of us wouldn"t hear her.
Holly dropped her head into one of her hands, Lara-Declan"s other sister-was pinching the bridge of her nose, and both of their husbands were giving each other looks as if they wanted to bolt for the door before it could get any worse.
I knew how they felt.
"I"m not staying here for this," I mumbled when Madeline began talking to Declan in a childish tone. "I"ll be back tonight." I didn"t say it to anyone in particular. I just spoke to the room as I grabbed my purse from where I"d dropped it earlier, and walked out of the room before I could start yelling at Linda.
The last thing I needed was for her to call security on me-since I knew she was itching to find a way to keep me from Declan"s room.
I hadn"t gotten halfway down the first hallway before I felt a familiar warmth slide across my skin.
I had been wrong. The last thing I needed was all the eyes of Declan"s family on me, seeing things they shouldn"t. Like that it didn"t actually bother me to watch Madeline hold Declan"s hand and talk to him-the whole idea behind it, and Linda"s intent, had been what bothered me most. Or that the person I was most upset with, and still needed more than anything, wasn"t the man lying in the bed.
"You should stay," I whispered when Jentry caught up with me.
"I drove you here."
"I can find a way home."
"Aurora." My name rumbled from deep in his chest, a question and demand all at once, and very clearly the end of the conversation.
I pressed my lips tightly together and nodded once, but didn"t look back at him, just continued to walk.
Because even though Declan"s sudden movements had pushed the girl who had been in my apartment aside, I hadn"t forgotten about her, and being alone with Jentry right now sounded like pure agony.
18.
Present Day
Aurora
My body sagged with an odd mixture of relief and exhaustion when we got back to the apartment and Jentry still hadn"t tried to talk to me again. I knew I would feel even more relieved if I could just go lie down, but my bed felt so far away.
"Are we not going to talk about this?" Jentry asked.
I let out a huff that sounded more like a scoff, and kept walking in the direction of my room.
"Aurora." He grabbed for my arm, but I jerked it away. "Aurora, stop!"
I whirled around when he finally grasped my hand, but managed to yank it away again when my apparent anger shocked him. "What exactly do you want to talk about?" I asked.
"The f.u.c.k, Aurora?"