He thought about what happened. It was over in just a few moments. He killed someone innocent in just a few moments. If he wasn"t a monster then who was?Whenever he killed someone, he"d always faint right afterwards. Then he"d wake up a few hours later, start crying and regret his own existence for a while, reflect on his mistakes and then leave it all behind.
That"s how it used to be, but now it was different. Ever since that time when he almost killed Jin Long, he changed. He felt as if he"d never to leave that accident behind.
He had never enjoyed killing people, but before he didn"t care especially much.
He just ended up thinking that "What"s done can"t be changed. Better leave it behind."
Ever since he met his dear father Long, his way of thinking changed. Ever since his dear father Long sacrificed his own life to keep him safe, he finally understood the value and importance of a human life.
He always treated animals and beasts with kindness, because they always cared for him. Believe it or not, he hadn"t met a single human being who"d treat him nicely and with respect… not until he met Jin Long. That encounter changed him for the better.
This was the first life he threw away since he met his father Long… The first time since his way of thinking changed. Now he couldn"t just leave it all behind. He couldn"t just burn the body, scatter the ashes and forget all about it.
He hated himself more and more for every life he just threw away, but rather than crying about it for the rest of his life, he decided not to think about it. He thought that if he just forgot about it, it"d hurt less.
Every time he thought about it, his guilt would take over. He"d start crying and tell all of his regrets out loud. Even if n.o.body was there to listen, he"d just talk to himself.
He promised himself to always put up a façade in front of others. To never let them understand the sorrow, hate and regret he held locked up inside his heart.
He didn"t want others sympathy. He just wanted someone to to listen to him and actually care. Someone who"d never judge him. Someone who"d always believe in him.
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He didn"t wish to be famous or have tons of people around him. All he wanted was ONE person. ONE person who"d try to understand him. The REAL him. Someone who"d never be fooled by the façade he"d always show in front of everyone else.
He knew that he"d never find someone like that, but he still longed for it. It was his greatest wish as well as his greatest secret.
To him, wishes were one out of many things that made one weak. That"s why he never told anyone about them. He didn"t want anyone to think that he was weak.
He remembered how he felt when his uncle Niao told him that he had absolutely nothing… that he was absolutely nothing. He felt hopeless… useless…
He didn"t want to feel like that ever again. His uncle Niao had gotten his hopes up by telling him that his father Long had said that he was a genius. Then he crushed all of those hopes when he helped Xiao Huoyan go through his awakening.
He decided to bury his greatest wish. He decided to do his best to become stronger than anyone else. If he became the strongest, then no one would dare to do anything to him. Everyone would have to treat him with respect.
As Xiao Huoyan was in deep thoughts, someone came rushing in through the door. Even though someone came in through the door behind him, Xiao Huoyan didn"t feel like standing up yet, so he just sat on the floor. He didn"t even turn around to see who it was. He just used Heaven"s Eyes to see who it was.
He didn"t recognize the man standing behind him. He thought about simply just asking about the man"s ident.i.ty but decided to just find out by himself. He took a little peek inside of the man"s head. He wanted to make it clear that he wasn"t someone whom that man could even dream of messing with, so he decided to show off that domineering aura of his.
"Do you have something important to say or are you just going to stand there all day, Xiong Hu? I do somewhere I have to be, so make it quick!"
"Uh… I-I just…"
At first, Xiong Hu looked startled, but he quickly came back to his senses and started speaking.
"His Lord Niao wanted me to come and g-get you."
"Get me where?"
"I-I cannot say…"
"Okay, you don"t really have to. I"ll find out by myself then."
Xiao Huoyan turned around and stood up. In just a mere second he already faced Xiong Hu directly. He shot him a glance and then turned around again, yet still standing.
"Hm… Not that far…Rosewood City…"
"H-HOW D-DID YOU?!?!"
"Don"t worry. I just read your mind, no need to react like that."
"You… You what?!"
"Are you deaf or something? I. Read. Your. Mind."
"…"
"So, are you going to help me get there or not?"
"O-Oh, yes! I came here to help you get there."
"Hm… Then who am I?"
"What are you t-talking about? Y-you"re Jin Niao"s son, Jin Xin…"
"No, I"m not."