"Why are you sulking?" joked Yan Ying. Xiu harrumphed in response and refused to look at Ying. Since Xiu"s silence was bothering her, Ying stopped the car at the side and poked Xiu"s shoulder, "Hey, are you not gonna talk to me?""NO!" glowered Xiu.
"Why?"
Xiu turned to face her and raged, "You don"t know?"
"I don"t," answered Ying casually. She really couldn"t understand why Xiu"s mood was s.h.i.+fting like this. Although she found Xiu quite adorable acting like this, she still didn"t like it. "Please, do tell me what made you so mad?"
"How could you agree just like that?" Ying raised her brow inquisitively and Xiu elaborated, "Doesn"t it already hurt enough? Now, you"re gonna arrange for the wedding planner as well. You might as well just go and arrange the whole wedding of your best friend."
"Not a bad idea," said Ying thoughtfully and Xiu was left gaping at her in disbelief.
"Are you for real?!" exclaimed Xiu. "How can you even think like that?"
"Didn"t you hear the excitement in Weiwei"s voice? How could I just say no to that?"
"Ying Jie! For someone else"s happiness, you can"t keep killing your own heart and wishes. It"s not fair!" Xiu was feeling really bad for her. The image of her previous self that she saw in Ying was getting clearer now. No wonder she always felt so close to Ying. She reminded Xiu of Chen Xiu; Her past!
Ying patted her head, "Don"t get so worked up..." She took a pause before saying, "My parents had rarely been home." Xiu frowned as she stared at Ying. "Both my parents had always been busy with work. I was mostly left with Zizi and his wife. Perhaps, that"s how I came to find solace in Xiaoli which I named as love."
She looked out the window as she went on, "You might a.s.sume that I"m not close to my parents but that"s wrong. I"m an only child and I"m very close to my parents. And since I"m very close to my own parents, I grew close to every other elder around me. I hate seeing people close to me getting hurt."
She looked back at Xiu who had a complicated look in her eyes now. "If I had said no to Weiwei, she"d have been upset. She"s like my own mother. If I can"t even bring myself to hurt my mom, why should I hurt someone else"s mom? Everyone"s mother is special and precious. If I can respect my own, it won"t hurt me to respect anyone else"s mother."
Xiu scoffed, "You remind me of someone I hated for years." Ying was confused to hear it. "She was so kind that her kindness ended up killing her. Oh, wait. She killed herself." Xiu was clenching her hands tightly. "Weiwei might be oblivious. But you know it that Qiu Meihui did this to hurt you. Why are you letting her tear you down like this?"
"I know why Meihui did this. You don"t need to tell me that. But so what? Even if she had asked the same thing herself, I"d still agree to help."
"But why?!"
"Because she"s marrying my best friend. She"s marrying Zizi"s son. And most importantly, if I refuse to help it means her actions are hurting me and I"m trying to run from it. But I ain"t no quitter. So what if she won? I"m no innocent little girl either because I won"t give her the satisfaction of this victory.
"If you"re gonna kill an enemy, do it with a smile. That"s my life goal!"
Xiu was left staring at her speechlessly. She finally realized the difference between herself and Ying. While she drowned in self-pity, Ying was strong enough to learn to swim in that pool of self-pity. They both were broken by the ones they loved but Chen Xiu lost herself with that loved one and Ying wasn"t someone who was gonna let a man define her.
"Besides, Xiu, I don"t believe in keeping my pride over loved ones. We can"t survive on pride. I"d rather choose to love than choose my ego over it. And if me bowing down before love can bring a smile to another person"s face, it"s enough for me."
Xiu slumped down in her seat and closed her eyes. "As I said the other day, you"re really like a blank canvas. And since you love seeing others painting you in the color they like, I wish you find someone who could paint you in the color that only belongs to you."
Ying tussled her hair softly, "I don"t get it though. Why do I feel like you"re more upset than me? It seems like you"re ready to pick a fight with the whole world for me."
Xiu straightened up, "Because I really am ready to fight for you." Ying was surprised as Xiu rolled her sleeves saying, "Who dares to hurt you? I don"t just call you Ying Jie, I honestly respect you like an elder sister. That"s different, I love teasing you but I don"t do it with just anyone. I do it with you only. After Nora, you"re the only one I"m willing to call a sister. So what if we"re not blood-related? So what if we haven"t known each other for years? What matters is that I feel comfortable with you."
Ying laughed out heartily before starting the car again to get back on road.
"Why are you laughing? I"m serious!"
"I"m not laughing at you. I"m just reminded of how I used to beg my mother to get me a little sister. I was only three but my mom says, I was always after her. I always just asked for a sister." Ying was happily reminiscing about the distant memories.
"But you didn"t get one," replied Xiu.
"I did," answered Ying shocking Xiu.
"But you said you"re an only child!"
"I am," said Ying making Xiu give her a dumbfounded look. "But the sister I got was from Zizi and aunt Wen. When she was born, she was so adorable. I saw the photos, I was the first one to even hold her in my arms. Even Xiaoli wasn"t allowed to get close to her."
"Li bro doesn"t have a sister though."
"She... died," said Ying heavily.