"When it isn"t absolutely necessary," continued Colville. "Especially as you say there will be no opposition."
"Of course," Imogene a.s.sented; and in fact what he said was very just, and he knew it; but he could perceive that he had suffered loss with her. A furtive glance at Mrs. Bowen did not a.s.sure him that he had made a compensating gain in that direction, where, indeed, he had no right to wish for any.
"Well, then," the girl went on, "it shall be so. We will wait. It will only be waiting. I ought to have thought of you before; I make a bad beginning," she said tremulously. "I supposed I was thinking of you; but I see that I was only thinking of myself." The tears stood in her eyes.
Mrs. Bowen, quite overlooked in this apology, slipped from the room.
"Imogene!" said Colville, coming toward her.
She dropped herself upon his shoulder. "Oh, why, why, why am I so miserable?"
"Miserable, Imogene!" he murmured, stroking her beautiful hair.
"Yes, yes! Utterly miserable! It must be because I"m unworthy of you--unequal every way. If you think so, cast me off at once. Don"t be weakly merciful!"
The words pierced his heart. "I would give the world to make you happy, my child!" he said, with perfidious truth, and a sigh that came from the bottom of his soul. "Sit down here by me," he said, moving to the sofa; and with whatever obscure sense of duty to her innocent self-abandon, he made a s.p.a.ce between them, and reduced her embrace to a clasp of the hand she left with him. "Now tell me," he said, "what is it makes you unhappy?"
"Oh, I don"t know," she answered, drying her averted eyes. "I suppose I am overwrought from not sleeping, and from thinking how we should arrange it all."
"And now that it"s all arranged, can"t you be cheerful again?"
"Yes."
"You"re satisfied with the way we"ve arranged it? Because if--"
"Oh, perfectly--perfectly!" She hastily interrupted. "I wouldn"t have it otherwise. Of course," she added, "it wasn"t very pleasant having some one else suggest what I ought to have thought of myself, and seem more delicate about you than I was."
"Some one else?"
"You know! Mrs. Bowen."
"Oh! But I couldn"t see that she was anxious to spare me. It occurred to me that she was concerned about your family."
"It led up to the other! it"s all the same thing."
"Well, even in that case, I don"t see why you should mind it. It was certainly very friendly of her, and I know that she has your interest at heart entirely."
"Yes; she knows how to make it seem so."
Colville hesitated in bewilderment. "Imogene!" he cried at last, "I don"t understand this. Don"t you think Mrs. Bowen likes you?"
"She detests me."
"Oh, no, no, no! That"s too cruel an error. You mustn"t think that. I can"t let you. It"s morbid. I"m sure that she"s devotedly kind and good to you."
"Being kind and good isn"t liking. I know what she thinks. But of course I can"t expect to convince you of it; no one else could see it."
"No!" said Colville, with generous fervour.
"Because it doesn"t exist and you mustn"t imagine it. You are as sincerely and unselfishly regarded in this house as you could be in your own home. I"m sure of that. I know Mrs. Bowen. She has her little worldlinesses and unrealities of manner, but she is truth and loyalty itself. She would rather die than be false, or even unfair. I knew her long ago--"
"Yes," cried the girl, "long before you knew me!"
"And I know her to be the soul of honour," said Colville, ignoring the childish outburst. "Honour--like a man"s," he added. "And, Imogene, I want you to promise me that you"ll not think of her any more in that way. I want you to think of her as faithful and loving to you, for she is so. Will you do it?"
Imogene did not answer him at once. Then she turned upon him a face of radiant self-abnegation. "I will do anything you tell me. Only tell me things to do."
The next time he came he again saw Mrs. Bowen alone before Imogene appeared. The conversation was confined to two sentences.
"Mr. Colville," she said, with perfectly tranquil point, while she tilted a shut book to and fro on her knee, "I will thank you not to defend me."
Had she overheard? Had Imogene told her? He answered, in a fury of resentment for her ingrat.i.tude that stupefied him. "I will never speak of you again."
Now they were enemies; he did not know how or why, but he said to himself, in the bitterness of his heart, that it was better so; and when Imogene appeared, and Mrs. Bowen vanished, as she did without another word to him, he folded the girl in a vindictive embrace.
"What is the matter?" she asked, pushing away from him.
"With me?"
"Yes; you seem so excited."
"Oh, nothing," he said, shrinking from the sharpness of that scrutiny in a woman"s eyes, which, when it begins the perusal of a man"s soul, astonishes and intimidates him; he never perhaps becomes able to endure it with perfect self-control. "I suppose a slight degree of excitement in meeting you may be forgiven me." He smiled under the unrelaxed severity of her gaze.
"Was Mrs. Bowen saying anything about me?"
"Not a word," said Colville, glad of getting back to the firm truth again, even if it were mere literality.
"We have made it up," she said, her scrutiny changing to a lovely appeal for his approval. "What there was to make up."
"Yes?"
"I told her what you had said. And now it"s all right between us, and you mustn"t be troubled at that any more. I did it to please you."
She seemed to ask him with the last words whether she really had pleased him, as if something in his aspect suggested a doubt; and he hastened to rea.s.sure her. "That was very good of you. I appreciate it highly. It"s extremely gratifying."
She broke into a laugh of fond derision. "I don"t believe you really cared about it, or else you"re not thinking about it now. Sit down here; I want to tell you of something I"ve thought out." She pulled him to the sofa, and put his arm about her waist, with a simple fearlessness and matter-of-course promptness that made him shudder. He felt that he ought to tell her not to do it, but he did not quite know how without wounding her. She took hold of his hand and drew his lax arm taut. Then she looked up into his eyes, as if some sense of his misgiving had conveyed itself to her, but she did not release her hold of his hand.
"Perhaps we oughtn"t, if we"re not engaged?" she suggested, with such utter trust in him as made his heart quake.
"Oh," he sighed, from a complexity of feeling that no explanation could wholly declare, "we"re engaged enough for that, I suppose."
"I"m glad you think so," she answered innocently. "I knew you wouldn"t let me if it were not right." Having settled the question, "Of course,"
she continued, "we shall all do our best to keep our secret; but in spite of everything it may get out. Do you see?"
"Well?"
"Well, of course it will make a great deal of remark."
"Oh yes; you must be prepared for that, Imogene," said Colville, with as much gravity as he could make comport with his actual position.