DON’T WAIT, EXFOLIATE
Perry sat slumped on his couch, a Newcastle Brown Ale in one hand and the remote control in the other. He flipped through the channels without really seeing the programs.
He’d known the blue and green plaid couch since he’d been a kid, when his dad brought it home from the Salvation Army as a surprise for his mom. At the time the couch was in pretty good shape for a handme-down, but that was some fifteen years ago. After his mother died, the couch — and the dishes and silverware, none of which matched — was all he’d taken from the old house. As far as he knew, the house was still sitting on that dirt road in Cheboygan, crumbling into nothingness. During Perry’s childhood, Dad’s repet.i.tive handyman-special repairs were the only thing that kept the place standing. Perry knew that no one else would ever want the ramshackle house; it was either rotting away or already bulldozed under.
He’d had the couch for several years, first at college, then in his apartment. After that long it fit the contours of his big body as if it were custom-made for him. But even the couch, a beer and the remote control couldn’t remove the blackness that had followed him home from work. He’d been sent home early. Sent home, for crying out loud, like some undisciplined, lazy worker. That alone would have been enough to crush his spirit, but the Magnificent Seven simply refused to subside.
And they didn’t just itch anymore. They hurt.
It wasn’t just the thick, crusty scabs that throbbed incessantly. There was something else, something that ran deep. Something in his body told him that things were spiraling out of hand.
Perry had always wondered if cancer patients knew something was horribly wrong. Sure, people always acted surprised when the doctor gave them that “x-amount-of-time-to-live” s.h.i.t, and some of them probably were a little surprised, but a lot of people suffer pain that they know isn’t natural. Like his dad.
His dad had known. Although he never said a word to anyone, he grew even quieter, even more serious and even more angry. Yeah, although
Perry didn’t put the pieces together until his father entered the hospital, the old man had known.
And now Perry knew. He had a weird feeling in his stomach. Not an instinct or intuition or anything like that but a feathery, queasy feeling. For the first time since the rashes had flared up on Monday morning, Perry wondered if it might be something . . . fatal.
He stood and walked to the bathroom. Removing his shirt, he stared at his once-buff body. Obviously, the lack of sleep caused by his condition (it was a “condition” now, because of the feeling that something was really wrong) was getting to him. He looked pathetic. He always rubbed his head when he became nervous, and his hair stuck up wildly in all directions. His skin appeared paler than normal, even for a German boy trudging through a Michigan winter. The darkness under his eyes was p.r.o.nouncedly unattractive.
He looked . . . sick.
Another detail caught his eye, although he wondered if it was his imagination. His muscles seemed slightly more defined. He slowly rotated his arm, watching the deltoid flutter beneath his fatty skin. Was he more cut than before?
Perry unb.u.t.toned his pants and kicked them into the corner. He opened the medicine cabinet and grabbed the tweezers, then sat on the toilet. The cold seat made goose b.u.mps run up and down his flesh.
He gave the tweezers a flick with his finger. They vibrated with a soft tuning-fork hum.
The rash on his left thigh was the easiest one to get at. He’d done a lot of damage to it, both from intentional scratching and his unconscious attack during the previous night. Scabs, both crusty-old and newly red, caked the three-inch-diameter rash. Seemed like as good a spot as any to get rolling.
He pinched the area around the scab-encrusted rash with his right forefinger and thumb, making it bulge out a little. Part of the scab’s edge had begun to peel naturally. He started picking with the tweezers, pinched them down on a flake of scab and gently pulled. The scab lifted, but stayed firmly affixed to the skin.
Perry leaned forward, eyes narrowing with determination and intensity. It would hurt like the proverbial b.i.t.c.h, but he was getting that thing off his body. He squeezed the tweezers harder and yanked. The thick
scab finally gave, accompanied by a flash of pain; it came free with the tiniest of tearing sounds.
He set the tweezers down on the counter, then pulled off a strip of toilet paper. He dabbed at the bleeding, open sore. After a few seconds, the bleeding stopped. The exposed skin underneath didn’t look right. It should have had that wet look, that shiny look, like skin-in-progress or something. This looked different.
Too different.
The flesh looked like an orange peel, not only in color but in texture as well. It smelled faintly of wet leaves. Tiny tears oozed watery blood.
A chill of stabbing panic knifed through his body. If this had happened to his leg, had it also happened to...?
He reached down to his t.e.s.t.i.c.l.es and slowly lifted them to get a good look, hoping to G.o.d they would look normal.
In effect, G.o.d told Perry to p.i.s.s off.
It was the scariest thing he’d ever seen. Pale orange skin covered the left side of his s.c.r.o.t.u.m. The area was mostly bald; only a few curly pubic hairs remained.
He’d been nervous up till now, even heading into the wonderful world of pure dread, but these were his b.a.l.l.s. His b.a.l.l.s, for crying out loud! He sat, frozen, the toilet seat refusing to warm up, the drip under the sink suddenly so loud he wondered in amazement how he’d ever managed to sleep in the tiny apartment.
His mouth felt paper dry. He heard himself breathing. Everything seemed so quiet. Perry fought to control the panic dancing back and forth through his mind; he tried to rationalize the situation.