"Yes," I agreed. "For once, everything tallied." I pa.s.sed the box to him.
"I"d like to hire you for this office. Here, nothing ever tallies. At least not earlier than midnight. Let, s go find that drink. I need one."
"So do I! Let"s."
The purser led me aft to an outdoor bar I had not noticed on the ship"s plan. The deck above us ended and the deck we were on, D deck, continued on out as a weather deck, bright teak planks pleasant to walk on. The break on C deck formed an overhang; under it was this outdoor spread canvas. At right angles to the bar were long tables offering a lavish buffet lunch; pa.s.sengers were queued up for it. Farther aft was the ship"s swimming pool; I could hear splashing, squeals, and yells.
He led me on aft to a small table occupied by two junior officers. We stopped there. "You two. Jump overboard."
"Right away, Purser." They stood up, picked up their beer gla.s.ses, and moved farther aft. One of them grinned at me and nodded, as if we knew each other, so I nodded and said, U."
This table was partly shaded by awning. The purser said to me, "Do you want to sit in the sun and watch the girls, or sit in the shade and relax?"
"Either way. Sit where you wish; I"ll take the other chair."
"Um. Let"s move this table a little and both sit in the shade. There, that does it." He sat down facing forward; perforce I sat facing the swimming pool - and confirmed something I thought I had seen at first glance: This swimming pool did not require anything as redundant as swim suits.
I should have inferred it by logic had I thought about it - but I had not. The last time I had seen it - swimming without suits - I had been about twelve and it had been strictly a male privilege for boys that age or younger.
"I said, "What will you drink, Mr Graham"
"Oh! Sorry, I wasn"t listening."
"I know. You were looking. What will it be?"
"Uh... a Danish zombie."
He blinked at me. "You don"t want that at this time of day; that"s a skull splitter. Mmm - "He waggled his fingers at someone behind me. "Sweetheart, come here."
I looked up as the summoned waitress approached. I looked and then looked twice. I had seen her last through an alcoholic haze the night before, one of two redheads in the hula chorus line.
"Tell Hans I want two silver fizzes. What"s your name, dear?"
"Mr Henderson, you pretend just one more time that you don"t know my name and I"ll pour your drink right on your bald spot."
"Yes, dear. Now hurry up. Get those fat legs moving."
She snorted and glided away on limbs that were slender and graceful. The purser added, "A fine girl, that. Her parents live just across from me in Odense; I"ve known her since she was a baby. A smart girl, too. Bodel is studying to be a veterinary surgeon, one more year to go."
"Really? How does she do this and go to school, too?"
"Most of our girls are at university. Some take a summer off, some take a term off - go to sea, have some fun, save up money for next term. In hiring I give preference to girls who are working their way through university; they are more dependable - and they know more languages. Take your room stewardess. Astrid?"
"No. Margrethe."
"Oh, yes, you are in one-oh-nine; Astrid has portside forward on your deck, Margrethe is on your side. Margrethe Svensdatter Gunderson. Schoolteacher. English language and history. But knows four more languages not counting Scandinavian languages - and has certificates for two of them. On one-year leave from H. C. Andersen Middle School. I"m betting she won"t go back."
"Eh? Why?"
"She"ll marry-a rich American. Are you rich?"
"Me"? Do I look rich?" (Could he possibly know what is in that lockbox? Dear G.o.d, what does one do with a million dollars that isn"t yours? I can"t just throw it overboard. Why would Graham be traveling with that much in cash? I could think of several reasons, all bad. Any one of them could get me in more trouble than I had ever seen.)
"Rich Americans never look it; they practice not looking rich. North Americans " I mean; South Americans are another fish entirely. Gertrude, thank you. You are a good girl."
"You want this drink on your bald spot?"
"You want me to throw you into the pool with your clothes on? Behave yourself, dear, or I"ll tell your mother. Put them down and give me the chit."
"No chit; Hans wanted to buy a drink for Mr Graham. So he decided to include you, this once."
"You tell him that"s the way the bar loses money. Tell him I take it out of his wages."
That"s how I happened to drink two silver fizzes instead of one... and was well on my way toward a disaster such as the night before, when Mr Henderson decided that we must eat. I wanted a third fizz. The first two had enabled me to quit worrying over that crazy box full of money while enhancing my appreciation of the poolside floor show. I was discovering that a lifetime of conditioning could wash away in only twenty-four hours. There was nothing sinful about looking at feminine loveliness unadorned. It was as sweetly innocent as looking at flowers or kittens - but far more fun.
In the meantime I wanted another drink.
Mr Henderson vetoed it, called Bodel over, spoke to her rapidly in Danish. She left, returned a few minutes later carrying a loaded tray - smorgasbord, hot meat b.a.l.l.s, sweet pastry sh.e.l.ls stuffed with ice cream, strong coffee, all in large quant.i.ties.
Twenty-five minutes later I still appreciated the teenagers at the pool, but I was no longer on my way to another alcoholic catastrophe. I had sobered up so much that I now realized that I not only could not solve my problems through spirits but must shun alcohol until I did solve them - as I did not know how to handle strong drink. Uncle Ed was right; vice required training and long practice otherwise for pragmatic reasons virtue should rule even when moral instruction has ceased to bind.
My morals certainly had ceased to bind - or I could not have sat there with a gla.s.s of Devil"s brew in my hand while I stared at naked female flesh.
I found that I had not even a twinge of conscience over anything. My only regret involved the sad knowledge that I could not handle the amount of alcohol I would have enjoyed. "Easy is the descent into h.e.l.l."
Mr Henderson stood up. "We tie up in less than two hours and I have some figures to fudge before the agent comes aboard. Thanks for a nice time."
"Thank you, sir! Tusind tak! Is that how you say it?"
He smiled and left. I sat there for a bit and thought. Two hours till we docked, three hours in port - what could I do with the opportunities?
Go to the American consul? Tell him what? Dear Mr Consul, I am not he whom I am presumed to be and I just happened to find this million dollars - Ridiculous!
Say nothing to anyone, grab that million, go ash.o.r.e and catch the next airship for Patagonia?
Impossible. My morals had slipped - apparently they were never very strong. But I III had this prejudice against stealing. It"s not only wrong; it"s undignified.
Bad enough that I"m wearing his clothes.
Take the three thousand that is "rightfully" yours, go" ash.o.r.e, wait for the ship to sail, then get back to America as best you can?
Stupid ideal. You would wind up in a tropical jail and your silly gesture would not do Graham any good. It"s Hobson"s choice again, you knothead; you must stay aboard and wait for Graham to show up. He won"t, but there might be a wireless message or something. Bite your nails until the ship sails. When it does, thank G.o.d for a trip home to G.o.d"s country. While Graham does the same for his ticket home in the Admiral Moffett. I wonder how he liked being named Hergensheimer? Better than I like "Graham" I"ll bet. A proud name, Hergensheimer.
I got up, ducked around to the far side, and went up two decks to the library, found it unoccupied save for a woman, working on a crossword puzzle. Neither of us wanted to be disturbed, which made us good company. Most of the bookcases were locked, the librarian not being present, but there was a battered encyclopedia - just what I needed as a start.
Two hours later I was startled by a blast indicating that we had a line to the dock; we had arrived. I was loaded with strange history and stranger ideas and none of it digested. To start with, in this world William Jennings Bryan was never president; in I896 McKinley had been elected in his place, had served two terms and had been followed by someone named Roosevelt.
I recognised none of the twentieth-century presidents.