"I remember every single word you have ever said to me," he answered gravely, with his full straight glance meeting hers. And then it was Nidia Commerell"s turn to subside into silence, for there struck across her mind, in all its force, the badinage she had exchanged with her friend in the privacy of their chamber. If he had never before, as she defined it, "hung out the signals," John Ames was beginning to do so now--of that she felt very sure; yet somehow the thought, unlike in other cases, inspired in her no derision, but a quickened beating of the heart, and even a little pain, though why the latter she could not have told.
"Come," she said suddenly, consulting her watch, "we must put on some pace or we shall miss the train. We have some way to go yet."
On over the breezy flat of the Rondebosch camp-ground and between long rows of cool firs meeting overhead; then a sharp turn and a spin of straight road; and in spite of the recurring impediments of a stupidly driven van drawn right across the way, and a long double file of khaki-clad mounted infantry crossing at right angles and a foot"s pace, they reached the station in time, but only just. Then, as Nidia, laughing and panting with the hurry of exertion she had been subjected to, flung herself down upon the cushion of the compartment, and her escort, having seen the bicycles safely stowed, at considerable risk to life and limb, thanks to a now fast-moving train, clambered in after her, both felt that the spell which had been moving them to grave and serious talk was broken between them--for the present.
But later--when the midday glow had somewhat lost its force, when the golden lights of afternoon were painting with an even more vivid green the vernal slopes piling up to the great crags overhanging Camp"s Bay, the same seriousness would recur, would somehow intrude and force its way in. They had left their bicycles at the inn where they had lunched, and had half strolled, half scrambled down to the place they now were in--a snug resting-place indeed, if somewhat hard, being an immense rock, flat-topped and solid. Overhead, two other boulders meeting, formed a sort of cave, affording a welcome shelter from the yet oppressive sun. Beneath, the ocean swell was raving with hoa.r.s.e sullen murmur among the iron rocks, dark with trailing ma.s.ses of seaweed, which seemed as a setting designed to throw into more gorgeous relief the vivid, dazzling blue of each little inlet. Before, the vast sheeny ocean plain, billowing to the ruffle of the soft south wind.
"Really, you are incorrigible," said Nidia at last, breaking the silence. "What shall I do to make you talk?"
"Yes; I am very slow to-day--I sorrowfully admit it," he answered, with a laugh which somehow or other lacked the ring of merriment.
"I know," went on Nidia. "I must start discussing the Raid. There!
You will have to be interesting then."
"That"s ruled out," he replied, the point being that from the very first days of their acquaintance the Raid was a topic he had resolutely declined to argue or to express any opinion upon. "Besides, it"s such a threadbare subject. You are right, though. I am treating you very badly. In fact, it is not fair, and I am haunted by a shrivelling conviction that you are sorry you came out to-day, and at this moment are heartily wishing yourself at home. Am I not right?"
"No; quite wrong. I have, you know, a great respect for your convictions--at times, but for this last one I have nothing but contempt; yes, contempt--profound contempt. There! Will that satisfy you?"
Her tone was decisive, without being vehement. In it--in the glance of her eyes--he detected a ring of sympathy, of feeling. Could she read his inner thoughts, he wondered, that each hour of this day as it wore away did but tighten the grip of the bitter desolating pain that had closed around his heart? He watched her as she reclined there, the very embodiment of dainty and graceful ease. He noted the stirring of each little wave of gold-brown hair as it caressed her forehead to the breath of the soft sea wind; the quick lifting of the lashes revealing the deep blue of the soulful eyes, so free and frank and fearless as they met his; the rich tint of the smooth skin, glowing with the kiss of the air and sun; every curve, too, of the mobile expressive lips; and the self-restraint he was forced to put upon himself became something superhuman. And it was their last day together! She, for her part, was thinking, "John Ames is a fool, but the most self-controlled fool I ever met. How I shall miss him! Yes, indeed, how I shall miss him!" Aloud she said--
"I wonder when _we_ shall be going up-country?"
"Never, I predict," was the somewhat decisive rejoinder.
Nidia raised herself on one elbow. "You seem pretty certain as to that," she said, "so certain that I begin to think the wish is father to the thought."
"Thank you."
"There, there, don"t be cross. I am only teasing you. I can be an awful tease at times, can"t I? Ask Susie if I can"t--if you haven"t found it out already, that is."
The mischief had all left her voice, the laughing eyes were soft and sympathetic again. He laughed, too, but somewhat sadly.
"Because things up there are not over bright, and are likely to be less so. The cattle is all dying off from this new disease--rinderpest. The natives have never been thoroughly conquered, and there are still plenty of them. The loss of their cattle will make them desperate, and therefore dangerous. The outlook is gloomy all round."
"Oh, but you will be able to put things right when you get back."
John Ames stared, as well he might. Either she meant what she said or she did not. In the first event, she had a higher opinion of him than ever he had dreamed; in the second, the remark was silly to the last degree; and silliness was a fault, any trace of which he had not as yet discovered in Nidia Commerell.
"You cannot really mean that," he said. "If so, you must be under an entire misconception as to my position. I am only one of several. We each of us try to do our best, but none of us can do anything very great."
Listening intently, Nidia was saying to herself, "How true he rings!
Note. The swagger and egotism of the up-to-date Apollo is conspicuously absent here." Then, aloud--
"No; I was not chaffing. I believe you can do a great deal. Remember, we have been very much together of late, and I rather pride myself upon a faculty for character reading."
The delicate insinuation of flattery in her tone const.i.tuted the last straw. John Ames felt his resolution growing very weak. Pa.s.sionate words of adoration rose to his lips--when--
A screech and chatter of child voices and scurrying feet, right behind the rock under whose shadow the two were resting, then the sound of scrambling, and their resting-place was theirs no more. A round half-dozen uproarious infants were spreading themselves over the rock slabs around, their shrill shrieks of glee hardly arrested, as with a start they discovered the presence of others upon their new playground.
And that they were there to stay they speedily made known by dint of yelling response to the calls of the parent-bird, whose own voice drew nearer around the rock.
The spell was broken. At that moment John Ames would have given anything to have seen the rocks below swept by a sudden tidal wave. The spell was broken. The moment had come and gone, and he was aware, as by an intuitive flash, that it would not come again.
Nidia rose. Did she welcome the fortuitous relief or not? he wondered, as he glanced at her keenly.
"Let us stroll quietly back," she said. "We shall get no more peace with that nursery romping round us. Besides, it"s time we thought of beginning the return ride.
"What an ideal day it has been!" resumed Nidia, when the ground became even enough to carry on conversation with any degree of facility.
"Hasn"t it?"
"M"yes. Very "ideal," in that like other ideals it doesn"t last. An ideal is like a wine-gla.s.s, sooner or later destined to be shattered."
"That"s quite true. I wonder are there any exceptions to the rule?"
"Safely, no. People set one up for themselves and adore it; then crash--bang! some fine day they knock it down, and it shatters into smithereens. Then there is a pedestal empty--a pedestal to let."
"And up goes another image, with like result," laughed the girl.
"Precisely. But how cynical we are becoming. By the way, to go back to what I was saying a little while ago, you will probably not be coming up-country at all. Then we shall never see each other again."
"Even then, why should we not?"
"Why? Why, because the chance that--that made us meet now is not likely to recur. That sort of blessed luck is not apt to duplicate in this vale of woe. Not much."
She smiled, softly, tenderly. The self-contained John Ames was waxing vehement. His words were tumbling over each other. He could hardly get them out quick enough.
"And would you mind so very much if it did not?"
"Yes."
"So would I."
Then silence for a few moments. They were walking along a high-road.
At very short intervals the ubiquitous cyclist--singly or in pairs--shot noiselessly by, or here and there a coloured pedestrian, seated by the roadside, eyed them indifferently.
"Why should we lose sight of each other?" said John Ames at length. "Do you know--this time we have had together has been--has been one that I could never have dreamed of as within the bounds of possibility."
"We have had a good time, haven"t we?" a.s.sented Nidia, demurely, though conscious of a quickening pulse. "And now, I don"t mind telling you something--because I have failed to discover one atom of conceit in your composition--so I don"t mind telling you--"
"What?"
The interruption was startling. The voice was dry, the face stony. Had he but known it the interrupter was going up many degrees in the speaker"s estimation.
"Only that I shall miss you dreadfully--when you are gone."
Nidia"s mischievous demureness simply bubbled with enjoyment at the look of relief which came over the other"s features. She continued--
"As you say, why _should_ we lose sight of each other? You may write to me occasionally--when you can spare the time required for the saving of your country from all the ills that threaten it. But--let"s see, I--oh, well, never mind--I was going to say something, but I won"t. And now-- we must not be serious any more. We have had a lovely day, the loveliest day we could possibly have had, and we are going to have a lovely ride back. Here we are at the hotel again."
The significance of the tone, the veiled emphasis which underlay the remark, was not lost upon the listener. John Ames was one who knew when to let well alone. Patience, tact, a judicious mind, were all among his qualifications for his responsible and difficult post. Should they fail him in a matter where private feeling, however deep, was concerned? So he acquiesced.