""Well, there"s a awful scatterin" of dust and chips when that sort of a fight is on; but n.o.body ever yet heard of thunder gettin" the better of a blackgum-tree. And I"m goin" to be a blackgum!"
"Mrs. Batterfield made no reply to this remark, but in her heart she said: "And I"m goin" to be thunder."
"The next morning, Abner Batterfield put on his best clothes, and walked to the little town about two miles distant. He didn"t enter the business part of the place, but turned into a shady side street where stood a small one-story building, almost by itself. This was the village library, and the librarian was sitting in the doorway, reading a book.
He was an elderly man of comfortable contour, and wore no gla.s.ses, even for the finest print.
""Mornin", Abner," said the librarian; "have you brought back that book?"
"Abner seated himself on the door-step. "No, I haven"t, Mr. Brownsill,"
said he; "I forgot it. I forgot it, but I remember some things that"s in it, and I"ve come to talk about "em."
""Very good," said the librarian, closing the volume of Salmon"s Geographical Grammar with his finger at page 35, treating of paradoxes, and remarked: "Well, Abner, what is it?"
"Then Abner Batterfield told his tale. He was going to make a fresh start; he was going to spend the rest of his life in some manner worthy of him. He hadn"t read much of the book he had taken out of the library, for in his present way of spending his life there didn"t seem to be any very good time for reading, but he had read enough of it to make him feel that it was time for him to make a fresh start, and he was going to do it.
""And I may have a tough time," said Abner; "but it"ll be blackgum ag"in" thunder, and I"m blackgum!"
"The librarian smiled. "What are you going to do?" said he.
""That"s a thing," said Abner, "I"m not so certain about. I"ve been thinkin" of enterin" the ministry; but the bother about that is, I can"t make up my mind which particular denomination to enter. There"s such a difference in "em."
""That"s true," said Mr. Brownsill; "that"s very true! But haven"t you a leaning for some one of them in particular?"
""In thinkin" it over," said Abner, "I"ve been drawn to the Quakers. So far"s I kin find out, there"s nothin" a Quaker preacher has to do if he don"t want to."
""But then, on the other hand," said the librarian, "there"s no pay."
""Which won"t work at all," said Abner, "so that"s got to be dropped. As to the Methodists, there"s too much work. A man might as well stick to hoein" corn."
""What do you think of the Catholics?" asked the librarian, meditatively. "I should think a monk in a cell might suit you. I don"t believe you"d be expected to do much work in a cell."
"Abner cogitated. "But there ain"t no pay to that, no more"n if I was a Quaker. And there"s Mrs. B. to be considered. I tell you, Mr. Brownsill, it"s awful hard makin" a ch"ice."
"The librarian opened his book and took a good look at the number of the page on which paradoxes were treated, so that he might remember it; then he rose and put the book upon the table, and, turning to Abner, he looked at him steadfastly.
""Abner Batterfield," said he, "I understand the state of your mind, and it is plain enough that it"s pretty hard for you to make a choice of a new path in life; but perhaps I can help you. How would you like to be a librarian?"
""Me!" exclaimed Abner, amazed.
""I don"t mean," said Mr. Brownsill, "that you should take up this business for life without knowing whether you like it or not, but I can offer you what might be called a sample situation. I want to go away for a couple of weeks to visit my relations, and if you will come and attend to the library while I am gone, it might be a good thing for both of us. Then, if you don"t like the business of a librarian, you might sample some other calling or profession."
"Abner rose from the door-step, and, entering the room, stood before Mr. Brownsill. "That"s the most sensible thing," said he, "that I ever heard said in all my life. Sample first, and go into afterwards; that"s sound reason. Mr. Brownsill, I will do it."
""Good!" said the librarian. "And the duties are not difficult."
""And the pay?" asked Abner.
""Just what I get," said Mr. Brownsill.
"The bargain was made, and Abner immediately began taking lessons in the duties of a librarian.
"When he went home he told his tale to Mrs. B. "I have hoed my last row of corn," said he, "and when it"s fit to cut and shock we"ll hire a man.
There"s librarians, Mrs. B., so Mr. Brownsill told me, that gets thousands a year. Think of that, Mrs. B.--thousands a year!"
"Mrs. Batterfield made no reply to this remark, but in her heart she said: "And I am thunder."
"Early the next morning, long before the ordinary time for opening the library, Abner was at his post. He took the key from the concealed nail where Mr. Brownsill was wont to hang it. He opened the door and windows, as the librarian told him he must do; he swept the floor; he dusted the books; and then he took the water-pail, and proceeded to the pump hard by. He filled it, then he sat down and wiped his brow. He had done so much sitting down and brow-wiping in his life that it had become a habit with him, even when he was neither hot nor tired.
"This little library was certainly a very pleasant place in which to earn one"s living--ten thousand times more to his taste than the richest corn-field. Around the walls were book-shelves, some of them nearly filled with books, most of which, judging from their bindings, were of a sober if not a sombre turn of mind.
""Some of these days," said Abner, "I am goin" to read those books; I never did have time to read books."
"From the ceiling there hung, too high to be conveniently dusted, a few stuffed birds, and one small alligator. "Some of these days," said Abner to himself, "I am goin" to get on a step-ladder and look at them birds and things; I never did properly know what they was."
"Now footsteps were heard on the sidewalk, and Abner jumped up quickly and redusted a book upon the table. There entered two little girls, the elder one with her hair plaited down her back. They looked in surprise at Abner, who smiled.
""I guess you want to see Mr. Brownsill," he said. "Well, I am in his place now, and all you got to do is to tell me what book you want."
""Please, sir," said the one with plaits, "mother wants to know if you can change a quarter of a dollar."
"This proposed transaction seemed to Abner to be a little outside of a librarian"s business, but he put his hand in his pocket and said he would see. When he had extracted all the change that pocket contained he found that he was the owner of three nickels and five copper cents. He tried some other pockets, but there was no money in any of them. He was disappointed; he did not want to begin his intercourse with the townspeople by failing to do the first favor asked of him. He looked around the room; he rubbed his nose. In a moment an idea struck him.
""How much do you want to get out of this quarter?" said he.
""Ten cents, sir," said the girl with the plaits. "The woman"s waitin"
fer it now."
""I"ll tell you," said Abner, "what I can do. All I have got is twenty cents. Two of these nickels will do for the woman, and then for the other five cents you can take out a book for a week. A duodecimo volume for a week is five cents. Is there any duodecimo volume you would like?"
"The girl with the plaits said she didn"t know, and that all she wanted was change for a quarter.
""Which this will be," said Abner.
"Asking the little girls to follow him, he approached the book-shelves.
"Now here"s something," said he, presently, taking down a book. "It"s Buck"s Theological Dictionary, and it"s got a lot of different things in it. Some of them your mother might like to read to you, and some of them she might like to read to herself. I once read one piece in that book myself. It is about the Inquisition, and when I began it I couldn"t stop until I got to the end of it. I guess your mother might like to read that, even if she don"t read it to you."
"The little girl said she didn"t know whether her mother would like it or not, but what she had been sent for was change for a quarter.
""This will be the same thing," said Abner; "twenty cents in money, and five cents for a duodecimo for one week. So take the money and the book, my dear, and tell your mother that if she keeps it out longer than one week there"ll be a fine."
"The child and the duodecimo departed, and Abner sat down again, and wiped his brow. "There"s one customer," said he, "and that"s the way to do business. They come to get you to do somethin" for them, and before they know it they"re doin" business with you, payin" cash in advance.
But there"s one thing I forgot. I oughter asked them young ones what their mother"s name was. But I"ll remember "em, specially the one with the plaited hair, so it"s all the same."
"The little girls went home. "It"s a new man at the library," said the one with the plaits, "and he hadn"t got no more"n twenty cents in money; but he sent you a book for the other five cents."
"The mother, with her baby in her lap, sent the ten cents to the woman who was waiting, and then took the book, which opened quite naturally at the article on the Inquisition, and began to read. And, although the baby grew restless and began to cry, she didn"t stop reading until she had finished that article. "It"s fully worth five cents," she said to herself, as she put it on the shelf for future perusal.
"It was not long before the thought struck Abner that he was losing opportunities which spread themselves around him, so he jumped up and took down a book. The volume proved to be one of "Elegant Extracts"; but after reading certain reflections "Upon Seeing Mr. Pope"s House at Binfield" he thought he would like something more in the nature of a story, and took up a thinner volume ent.i.tled "d.i.c.k"s Future State." He turned over the leaves, hoping to meet with some of the adventures of d.i.c.k; but his attention was arrested by a pa.s.sage which a.s.serted that arithmetic would be one of the occupations to be followed in heaven. He was about to put away the book in disgust--for to him there was no need of a man"s being good in this world if he were to be condemned to arithmetic in the next--when the light from the open door was darkened by a large body who approached in carpet slippers, making no noise. This proved to be a round and doleful negro woman, a greater part of her face wrapped up in a red-and-green handkerchief. Her attire was somewhat nondescript, and entirely unsuggestive of literary inclinations. She groaned as she entered the room.