Lee turned his eyes in the direction of the greens and the apple-trees; but the window was misty, and he could only see the drizzle of rain-drops on the diamond panes. As he sat there, a thought came into his head that he was beginning to feel old: old, and worn, and shaky.
Trouble ages a man more than work, more than time; and Lee never looked at the wan face of his daughter, and at its marks of sad repentance, but he felt anew the sting which was always p.r.i.c.king him more or less.
What with that, and his difficulty to keep the pot boiling, and his general state of shakiness, Lee was older than his years. Timberdale had fallen into the habit of calling him Old Lee, you see; but he was not sixty yet. He had a nice face; when it was a young face it must have been like Mamie"s. It had furrows in it now, and his scanty grey locks hung down on each side of it.
Putting on his top-coat, which was about as thin as those remarkable sheets told of by Brian O"Linn, Lee went out b.u.t.toning it. The rain had ceased, but the cold wind took him as he went down the narrow garden-path, and he could not help shivering.
"It"s a bitter wind to-day, father; in the north-east, I think," said Mamie, standing at the door to close it after him. "I hope there"ll be no letters for Crabb."
Lee, as he pressed along in the teeth of the cruel east wind, was hoping the same. Salmon the grocer, who had taken the post-office, as may be remembered, when the late Thomas Rymer gave it up, was sorting the letters in the room behind the shop when Lee went in. Spicer, a lithe, active, dark-eyed man of forty-five, stood at the end of the table waiting for his bag. Lee went and stood beside him, giving him a brief good-morning: he had not taken kindly to the man since West ran away with Mamie.
"A light load this morning," remarked Mr. Salmon to Spicer, as he handed him his appropriate bag. "And here"s yours, Lee," he added a minute after: "not heavy either. Too cold for people to write, I suppose."
"Anything for Crabb, sir?"
"For Crabb? Well, yes, I think there is. For the Rector."
Upon going out, Spicer turned one way, Lee the other. Spicer"s district was easy as play; Lee"s was a regular country tramp, the farm-houses lying in all the four points of the compa.s.s. The longest tramp was over to us at Crabb. And why the two houses, our own and Coney"s farm, should continue to be comprised in the Timberdale delivery, instead of that of Crabb, people could never understand. It was so still, however, and n.o.body bestirred himself to alter it. For one thing, we were not often at Crabb Cot, and the Coneys did not have many letters, so it was not like an every-day delivery: we chanced to be there just now.
The letter spoken of by Salmon, which would bring Lee to Crabb this morning, was for the Reverend Herbert Tanerton, Rector of Timberdale. He and his wife, who was a niece of old Coney"s, were now staying at the farm on a week"s visit, and he had given orders to Salmon that his letters, during that week, were to be delivered at the farm instead of at the Rectory.
Lee finally got through his work, all but this one letter for the parson, and turned his steps our way. As ill-luck had it--the poor fellow thought it so afterwards--he could not take the short and sheltered way through Crabb Ravine, for he had letters that morning to Sir Robert Tenby, at Bellwood, and also for the Stone House on the way to it. By the time he turned on the solitary road that led to Crabb, Lee was nearly blown to smithereens by the fierce north-east wind, and chilled to the marrow. All his bones ached; he felt low, frozen, ill, and wondered whether he should get over the ground without breaking down.
"I wish I might have a whiff at my pipe!"
A pipe is to many people the panacea for all earthly discomfort; it was so to Lee. But only in the previous February had occurred that damage to Helen Whitney"s letter, when she was staying with us, which the authorities had made much of; and Lee was afraid to risk a similar mishap again. He carried Salmon"s general orders with him: not to smoke during his round. Once the letters were delivered, he might do so.
His weak grey hair blowing about, his thin and shrunken frame shivering and shaking as the blasts took him, his empty post-bag thrust into his pocket, and the Rector of Timberdale"s letter in his hand, Lee toiled along on his weary way. To a strong man the walk would have been nothing, and not much to Lee in fairer weather. It was the cold and wind that tired him. And though, after giving vent to the above wish, he held out a little while, presently he could resist the comfort no longer, but drew forth his pipe and struck a match to light it.
How it occurred he never knew, never knew to his dying day, but the flame from the match caught the letter, and set it alight. It was that thin foreign paper that catches so quickly, and the match was obstinate, and the wind blew the flame about. He pressed the fire out with his hands, but a portion of the letter was burnt.
If Timbuctoo, or some other far-away place had been within the distance of a man"s legs, Lee would have made straight off for it. His pipe on the ground, the burnt letter underneath his horrified gaze, and his hair raised on end, stood he. What on earth should he do? It had been only a pleasant young lady"s letter last time, and only a little scorched; now it was the stern Rector"s.
There was but one thing he could do--go on with the letter to its destination. It often happens in these distressing catastrophes that the one only course open is the least palatable. His pipe hidden away in his pocket--for Lee had had enough of it for that morning--and the damaged letter humbly held out in his hand, Lee made his approach to the farm.
I chanced to be standing at its door with Tom Coney and Tod. Those two were going out shooting, and the Squire had sent me running across the road with a message to them. Lee came up, and, with a face that seemed greyer than usual, and a voice from which most of its sound had departed, he told his tale.
Tom Coney gave a whistle. "Oh, by George, Lee, won"t you catch it! The Rector----"
"The Rector"s a regular martinet, you know," Tom Coney was about to add, but he was stopped by the appearance of the Rector himself.
Herbert Tanerton had chanced to be in the little oak-panelled hall, and caught the drift of the tale. A frown sat on his cold face as he came forward, a frown that would have befitted an old face better than a young one.
He was not loud. He did not fly into a pa.s.sion as Helen Whitney did. He just took the unfortunate letter in his hand, and looked at it, and looked at Lee, and spoke quietly and coldly.
"This is, I believe, the second time you have burnt the letters?" and Lee dared not deny it.
"And in direct defiance of orders. You are not allowed to smoke when on your rounds."
"I"ll never attempt to smoke again, when on my round, as long as I live, sir, if you"ll only be pleased to look over it this time," gasped Lee, holding up his hands in a piteous way. But the Rector was one who went in for "duty," and the appeal found no favour with him.
"No," said he, "it would be to encourage wrong-doing, Lee. Meet me at eleven o"clock at Salmon"s."
"Never again, sir, so long as I live!" pleaded Lee. "I"ll give you my word of that, sir; and I never broke it yet. Oh, sir, if you will but have pity upon me and not report me!"
"At eleven o"clock," repeated Herbert Tanerton decisively, as he turned indoors again.
"What an old stupid you must be!" cried Tod to Lee. "He won"t excuse you; he"s the wrong sort of parson to do it."
"And a pretty kettle of fish you"ve made of it," added Tom Coney. "I wouldn"t have minded much, had it been my letter; but he is different, you know."
Poor Lee turned his eyes on me: perhaps remembering that he had asked me, the other time, to stand his friend with Miss Whitney. No one could be his friend now: when the Rector took up a grievance he did not let it drop again; especially if it were his own. Good-hearted Jack, his sailor-brother, would have screened Lee, though all the letters in the parish had got burnt.
At eleven o"clock precisely the Reverend Herbert Tanerton entered Salmon"s shop; and poor Lee, not daring to disobey his mandate, crept in after him. They had it out in the room behind. Salmon was properly severe; told Lee he was not sure but the offence involved penal servitude, and that he deserved hanging. A prosperous tradesman in his small orbit, the man was naturally inclined to be dictatorial, and was ambitious of standing well with his betters, especially the Rector. Lee was suspended there and then; and Spicer was informed that for a time, until other arrangements were made, he must do double duty. Spicer, vexed at this, for it would take him so much the more time from his legitimate business, that of horse doctor, told Lee he was a fool, and deserved not only hanging but drawing and quartering.
"What"s up?" asked Ben Rymer, crossing the road from his own shop to accost Lee, as the latter came out of Salmon"s. Ben was the chemist now--had been since Margaret"s marriage--and was steady; and Ben, it was said, would soon pa.s.s his examination for surgeon. He had his hands in his pockets and his white ap.r.o.n on, for Mr. Ben Rymer had no false pride, and would as soon show himself to Timberdale in an ap.r.o.n as in a dress-coat.
Lee told his tale, confessing the sin of the morning. Mr. Rymer nodded his head significantly several times as he heard it, and pushed his red hair from his capacious forehead.
"They won"t look over it this time, Lee."
"If I could but get some one to be my friend with the Rector, and ask him to forgive me," said Lee. "Had your father been alive, Mr. Rymer, I think he would have done it for me."
"Very likely. No good to ask me--if that"s what you are hinting at.
The Rector looks upon me as a black sheep, and turns on me the cold shoulder. But I don"t think he is one to listen, Lee, though the king came to ask him."
"What I shall do I don"t know," bewailed Lee. "If the place is stopped, the pay stops, and I"ve not another shilling in the world, or the means of earning one. My wife"s ailing, and Mamie gets worse day by day; and there are the two little ones. They are all upon me."
"Some people here say, Lee, that you should have sent Mamie and her young one to the workhouse, and not have charged yourself with them."
"True, sir, several have told me that. But people don"t know what a father"s feelings are till they experience them. Mary was my own child that I had dandled on my knee, and watched grow up in her pretty ways, and I was fonder of her than of any earthly thing. The workhouse might not have taken her in."
"She has forfeited all claim on you. And come home only to break your heart."
"True," meekly a.s.sented Lee. "But the Lord has told us we are to forgive, not seven times, but seventy times seven. If I had turned her adrift from my door and heart, sir, who knows but I might have been turned adrift myself at the Last Day."
Evidently it was of no use talking to one so unreasonable as Lee. And Mr. Ben Rymer went back to his shop. A customer was entering it with a prescription and a medicine-bottle.
One morning close upon Christmas, Mrs. Todhetley despatched me to Timberdale through the snow for a box of those delectable "Household Pills," which have been mentioned before: an invention of the late Mr.
Rymer"s, and continued to be made up by Ben. Ben was behind the counter as usual when I entered, and shook the snow off my boots on the door-mat.
"Anything else?" he asked me presently, wrapping up the box.
"Not to-day. There goes old Lee! How thin he looks!"
"Starvation," said Ben, craning his long neck to look between the coloured globes at Lee on the other side the way. "Lee has nothing coming in now."
"What do they all live upon?"