That same night she wrote for Francis. She could not rest day or night until she could see him face to face, and say--Is this true, or untrue?
He might have reached the Torr the previous day; but he did not. She was lying listening for him now in the twilight gloom amidst the blasts of that shrieking wind.
"If G.o.d had but taken my child in infancy!" came the chief thought of her troubled heart. "If I could only know that I should meet him on the everlasting sh.o.r.es!"
"Mother!"
She started up with a yearning cry. It was Francis. He had arrived, and come upstairs, and his opening of the door had been drowned by the wind.
A tall, slender, bright-faced young fellow of twenty, with the same sunny hair as in his childhood, and a genial heart.
Francis halted, and stood in startled consternation. The firelight played on her wasted face, and he saw--what was there. In manners he was still almost a boy; his disposition open, his nature transparent.
She made room for him on the sofa; sitting beside him, and laying her weary head for a moment on his shoulder. Francis took a few deep breaths while getting over the shock.
"How long have you been like this, mother? What has brought it about?"
"Nothing in particular; nothing fresh," she answered. "I have been getting nearer and nearer to it for years and years."
"Is there no hope?"
"None. And oh, my darling, but for you I should be so glad to die.
Sitting here in my loneliness for ever, with only heaven to look forward to, it seems that I have learnt to see a little already of what its rest will be."
Francis pushed his hair from his brow, and left his hand there. He had loved his mother intensely, and the blow was cruel.
Quietly, holding his other hand in hers, she spoke of what Stephen Radcliffe had heard. Francis"s face turned to scarlet as he listened.
But in that solemn hour he could not and would not tell a lie.
Yes, it was true; partly true, he said. He was not always so steady as he ought to be. Some of his acquaintances, young men studying law like himself, or medicine, or what not, were rather wild, and he had been the same. Drink?--well, yes; at times they did take more than might be quite needful. But they were not given to gambling: that was false.
"Francis," she said, her heart beating wildly with its pain, "the worst of all is the drink. If once you suffer yourself to acquire a love for it, you may never leave it off. It is so insidious----"
"But I don"t love it, mother; I don"t care for it--and I am sure you must know that I would tell you nothing but truth now," he interrupted.
"I have only done as the others do. I"ll leave it off."
"Will you promise me that?"
"Yes, I will. I do promise it."
She carried his hand to her lips and kissed it. Francis had always kept his promises.
"It is so difficult for young fellows without a home to keep straight in London," he acknowledged. "There"s no good influence over us; there"s no pleasant family circle where we can spend our evenings: and we go out, and get drawn into this and that. It all comes of thoughtlessness, mother."
"You have promised me, Francis."
"Oh yes. And I will perform."
"How long will it be before you are called to the Bar?" she asked, after a pause.
"Two years."
"So much as that?"
"I think so. How the wind howls!"
Mrs. Radcliffe sighed; Francis"s future seemed not to be very clear.
Unless he could get on pretty quickly, and make a living for himself--
"When I am gone, Francis," she said aloud, interrupting her own thoughts, "this will not be any home for you."
"It has not been one for me for some years now, mother."
"But if you do not get into work soon, and your own funds come to an end, you will have no home but this to turn to."
"If I attempted to turn to it, Stephen would soon make it too hot for me, I expect."
"That might not be all; not the worst," she quickly answered, dropping her voice to a tone of fear, and glancing around as one in a fever.
Francis looked round too. He supposed she was seeking something.
"It is always scaring me, Francis," she whispered. "There are times when I fancy I am going to see it enacted before my eyes. It puts me into a state of nervous dread not to be described."
"See what enacted?" he asked.
"I was sitting here about ten days ago, Francis, thinking of you, thinking of the future, when all at once a most startling prevision--yes, I call it so--a prevision came upon me of some dreadful ill in store for you; ill wrought by Stephen. I--I am not sure but it was--that--that he took your life," she added, scarcely above her breath, and in tones that made Francis shiver.
"Why, what do you mean, mother?"
"Every day, every day since, every night and nearly all night, that strange conviction has lain upon me. I know it will be fulfilled: when the hand of death is closing on us, these previsions are an instinct. As surely as that I am now disclosing this to you, Francis, so surely will you fall in some way under the iron hand of Stephen."
"Perhaps you were dreaming, mother dear," suggested Francis: for he had his share of common sense.
"It will be in this house; the Torr," she went on, paying no attention to him; "for it is always these rooms and the dreary trees outside that seem to lie before me. For that reason, I would not have you live here----"
"But don"t you think you may have been dreaming?" repeated Francis, interrupting the rest.
"I was as wide awake as I am now, Francis, but I was deep in thought.
It stole upon me, this impression, without any sort of warning, or any train of ideas that could have led to it; and it lies within me, a sure and settled conviction. _Beware of Stephen._ But oh, Francis! even while I give you this caution I know that you will not escape the evil--whatever it may turn out to be."
"I hope I shall," he said, rather lightly. "I"ll try, at any rate."
"Well, I have warned you, Francis. Be always upon your guard. And keep away from the Torr, if you can."
Holt, quite an aged woman now, came in with some tea for her mistress.
Francis took the opportunity to go down and see his father. Mr.
Radcliffe, in a shabby old coat, was sitting in his arm-chair at the parlour fire. He looked pleased to see Francis, and kept his hand for a minute after he had shaken it.
"My mother is very ill, sir," said Francis.
"Ay," replied the old man, dreamily. "Been so for some time now."