distrust As Bekk led us up the long, winding staircase to our room, I lifted the length of my skirt to keep from tripping and tumbling to my death. I had to be careful because I"d smuggled a few figs in it, since I had no idea when we would eat again.
The Queen had directed us to wait in our room while she consulted with the Viceroy and other advisers to come up with a plan of attack. Helge had made it abundantly clear that he thought we"d be waiting a long while.
"How did your meeting go?" Bekk asked, looking over her shoulder at Konstantin and me.
"It went well, I believe," Konstantin said, but he didn"t sound very confident.
I gave him a curious look. "It was better than I expected, actually."
"Me too." He met my gaze. "That"s what makes me nervous."
"What exactly did you want from the Queen?" Bekk asked when we reached the landing. "If you don"t mind me asking."
I looked over at Konstantin, who gave a noncommittal shrug. "I suppose if the Queen goes through with it, you"ll find out anyway," I decided. "We asked for her help in fighting off Viktor Dlig."
The smooth skin of Bekk"s brow furrowed. "I"ve heard that name before." She looked away, thinking. "I can"t remember where, but it"s definitely familiar."
"Maybe you"ve seen him on WANTED posters," I suggested, since she"d seen me on one. "He"s been the Kanin"s number one enemy for fifteen years."
"Maybe," Bekk agreed, but without much conviction. "Anyway, why do you think the Queen would help you with that?"
"Because he killed her nephew," Konstantin replied.
Bekk nodded. "And she agreed to it, then?"
"She said she would send people with us to help fight Viktor Dlig," I explained. "She"s just deciding who and how many."
"For what it"s worth, I"d be glad to go with you," Bekk said. "To see something outside of these walls, and to fight any enemy that"s hurt our people. It would be a great privilege."
"Thank you." I smiled. "We"d be more than happy to have you."
She smiled thinly, then motioned for us to go back into our cell. When we were inside, Bekk paused before closing the door.
"We"re a good people," she said. "But we"re a temperamental people. We mean well, but we can"t always be trusted. That"s something you have to keep in mind."
I wanted to ask her what she meant by that, but I didn"t think she"d really expound on it. She closed the door, leaving Konstantin and me standing in the middle of the room, and the locks clicked loudly.
Konstantin took his jacket off and tossed it on the bed. "Something doesn"t feel right."
"What do you mean?" I went over to the sink and set my figs in it, since it seemed like the only clean place to store them.
"I don"t know." He shook his head. "There"s just something..." He trailed off and then lay back on the bed, letting out an exasperated sigh.
"Bodil seemed on board with everything." I went over and knelt on the bed beside him. "That Helge guy seems like a total snake, but I think she"ll insist on sending at least a few men, and that will be enough for us to make a dent in Viktor"s army. We might even be able to stop them before they get to Doldastam.
"Then, of course, all we have to do is get back and somehow get rid of Mina, but that"s another problem for another day. We need to take all of this one step at a time," I said.
"You"re right," he relented, but he still sounded defeated.
When he looked up at me, he seemed so forlorn. His gray eyes had never looked so soft and sad before.
The sleeves of my gown fell just off the shoulder, revealing the scar on my left shoulder, and he reached up and touched it. An odd shiver went through me as he traced his finger along the thin ridge.
"That"s from me, isn"t it?" he asked thickly.
I nodded. "Yes."
"I"m sorry, white rabbit." He ran his fingers down the scar to my collarbone, and it made my breath catch in my throat, then he dropped his hand. "I never wanted to hurt you."
"Why would you care if you hurt me?" I asked, forcing a smile. "You didn"t even know me then."
The night Konstantin had attempted to kill my dad had been four long years ago. I"d only been a fifteen-year-old kid in tracker school, while he was older and a member of the elite Hogdragen. We"d moved in entirely different circles, and I wasn"t sure he even knew my name when he stabbed through the shoulder.
"You looked so hopeful that night. Your eyes were so wide and so blue when I talked to you." He smiled, looking both pained and wistful. "The whole world belonged to you for a moment."
It actually had been an amazing night. I"d felt drunk on happiness, and talking to Konstantin had added to that. Of course, that was before everything came crashing down.
His smile had fallen away. "And the look on your face when you saw me with your father ... I broke your heart."
"I..." I started to argue, but it was then that I realized it was true. He had broken my heart. I swallowed hard and looked away.
"Why that night?" I asked. "Why did you have to do that when I was there?"
"Mina had been asking me to do it for weeks, and I had an opportunity." He hesitated before adding, "I almost didn"t go through with it, and I think honestly my attempt was halfhearted. That"s why your father was still alive when you walked in."
"You knew it was wrong," I said. "How could you do it at all?"
"I loved her, and I would do anything she asked." He breathed deeply. "But that can"t be love, can it?"
"I"m not sure that I"m the one you should be asking. I"ve never been very good at love."
He sat up, moving closer to me. He used one arm to prop himself up, and his hand was resting right next to my thigh. "I know I can"t get absolution. I don"t deserve it. But do you think that I"ll ever be able to make up for the things I"ve done?"
"I don"t know," I admitted, meeting his gaze even though that made it hard for me breathe. "But I forgive you."
"You don"t have to do that," he said softly.
"I know. But I want to."
He lowered his eyes, and abruptly, I got up. The air felt too thick, and I"d become acutely aware of the intensity of his proximity. I went over to the window, putting my back to him and breathing in the fresh air. And I wondered with mixed emotions how much longer Konstantin and I would be trapped in this room.
THIRTEEN.
longing I woke up with Konstantin"s arm draped over me. I didn"t know how or when he"d put it there, but there it wa.s.strong and sure around my waist. Carefully and quietly, so I didn"t wake him, I slid out from underneath it and got up.
A full moon shone brightly in the night sky, bathing our cell in white light. Konstantin slept in just his boxers with a thin sheet over him, since the heat had gotten even more oppressive. I"d only worn my tank top and panties to bed, but I"d tried to keep distance between us. It hadn"t worked, apparently.
I stood next to the window, for a moment watching Konstantin sleep. His curls lying around his face, his dark lashes fluttering as he dreamt, his well-muscled bare torsoit was impossible to deny that Konstantin was a handsome man, especially when he was sleeping.
But something about this moment made me think of Ridley, and how I"d snuck out of bed that cold night when all I"d wanted was to stay in bed with him forever. And despite whatever feelings Konstantin seemed to bring up in me, I still felt that way. I still wanted to be with Ridley more than anything.
The very thought of him made my heart ache. I missed him terribly, and I had no way of knowing if he was safe. If Mina was as insane as Konstantin made her sound, she could"ve locked Ridley up forever.
I knew that we needed to be here now, getting the Omte to help us put a stop to Viktor"s army, but the second that was over, I needed to get back to Doldastam. I didn"t care what it meant for me, but I would do whatever it took to make sure Ridley was safe.
My jeans lay on the floor in a rumpled pile, and I brushed a c.o.c.kroach off them. I crouched down in the moonlight and pulled the TracFone out of my pocket. The battery was nearly dead, since it hadn"t been charged while we"d been here and I"d used quite a bit of battery life on the flashlight.
It was after midnight, and according to the clock, that made it Friday, May 16. It had been over a week since I"d left Doldastam, since I"d last seen Ridley. Would it be safe enough to call? And it was in the middle of the night. Who would be monitoring his calls now?
I bit my lip, staring down at the flashing battery on the screen, and debating what I should do. All I wanted was to hear his voice, to know that he was okay.
And then without thinking, I started dialing a number I had dialed hundreds of times before when I had been on missions. At that moment, the consequences didn"t seem to matter. I just needed him.
I held the phone up to my ear, listening desperately. It seemed to take forever until I heard the sound of ringingfaint and tinny. I closed my eyes, and in my mind I was begging Ridley to pick up.
But instead of Ridley"s voice I heard a despondent beep. I held the phone out, looking at it. The call had been dropped, and the message below the date warned me there was no service. I"d barely had a bar when I"d dialed in the first place, but I"d hoped that would be enough.
Now, staring at the useless phone in my hands, I wanted to scream or throw it against the wall. But I didn"t want to wake up Konstantin and explain what exactly had me so upset.
So I lowered my head against my chest and wrapped my arms around my head and took deep breaths. My whole body was trembling, and my chest felt like it had been ripped out. I squeezed my arms tighter, trying to literally hold myself together.
The locks on the door started to click open, and I nearly did scream then. I jumped to my feet, and I saw that Konstantin had done the samethrowing off his covers and leaping out of bed. We were ready for whatever was coming our way.
Since Bekk had delivered us back to the room after we"d had our meeting, we"d had no visitors. I"d been right about taking the figs, or else we would"ve had nothing else to eat for the day.
And now someone was coming in, in the middle of the night.
I saw the orange flame of the torch before I saw the figure coming in behind it. He had to bow down to get in the door, but as soon as he straightened up, it became clear that it was Helge Otack, the Viceroy.
"It"s time for you to go," Helge said with that serpentine smile.
"What?" I glanced over at Konstantin. "Are the men the Queen is sending ready to go?"
"No, I"m afraid you won"t be taking any men with you," Helge continued calmly. "The Queen spoke in haste today, and she"s changed her mind about everything. So it"s best for you to get out of here, since her hospitality has run dry."
"But the Queen" I started to argue.
"The Queen wants you to go," Helge snapped. "And if you don"t leave on your own, I"ll get Torun and he can make you go." He smiled wider then, revealing his jagged teeth, and I had a feeling that he"d get a great deal of enjoyment from watching Torun tear Konstantin and me apart.
"Bryn," Konstantin whispered, probably sensing that I wanted to continue fighting with Helge anyway. "We need to go."
And since there wasn"t anything more that we could say, Konstantin and I gathered our clothes and fled in the middle of the night, like prisoners making a break for it.
FOURTEEN.
repossess We"d sprung for the Holiday Inn, since we both needed a place where we could feel clean after our time in Fulatrask. After we had made our way through the wetlands, Konstantin had driven for hours before we stopped, on the off chance that the Omte decided to give chase.
"It just doesn"t make sense," I said for the hundredth time as I paced the room.
"It doesn"t have to make sense. They"re the Omte!" Konstantin was growing exasperated at having the same conversation with me. "Bekk even said they couldn"t be trusted."
"But Bodil wanted to do this!" I insisted. "I know she did. The Queen was for it. It"s her stupid Viceroy that interfered."
"That"s probably true," Konstantin admitted. He rummaged through his duffel bag, tossing clean clothes on the bed beside him. "Since you seem too worked up to shower, I"ll go first."
"Why would Helge talk her out of it, though?" I asked. "And did he even talk her out of it? Maybe the Queen was still for it, and that"s why he made us leave in the middle of the night. We should"ve fought him."
"And what if he"d brought Torun up?" Konstantin turned to look at me. "What then? We"ll somehow bring down Viktor"s army after we"ve been torn limb from limb?"
"I don"t know!" I stopped pacing and let my shoulders sag. "Why did Helge do that?"
"Because he was right." He walked over to me with his clothes in hand. "This isn"t the Omte"s fight.i.t"s the Kanin"s. They have no reason to risk their people for somebody else"s fight."
"But" I started to protest.
"It"s just how it is, Bryn. We"ll have to come up with something else." He put a hand on my shoulder to comfort me. "We"ll figure it out, though."
"How?" I asked him plaintively.
"I don"t know. We will, though," he a.s.sured me. "But first, I"m showering."
He left me alone in the main room and went into the bathroom. As soon as I heard the water running, I swore loudly, and then flopped back on one of the two beds. I closed my eyes and tried to think about where we could go from here.
If we went to the Vittra or the Trylle, they would just hold us captive until the Kanin could come retrieve us for a trial. They were close allies, and since the Kanin had the largest army, they wanted to keep the alliances.
The Skojare were out of the question. With everything so crazy there, they wouldn"t be able to help us at all, even if they wanted to.
There might be other expatriate trolls we could team up with, but it wasn"t like I could post an ad on craigslist saying, "Troll seeking other trolls to combat evil troll army."
I opened my eyes when something occurred to me. How had Bent Stum gotten mixed up with Konstantin and Viktor? Bodil had made Bent sound like he was rebellious, but I doubted he wanted to attack the Kanin. At least not without an incentive from somebody else.
So how did Viktor enlist him?
That would be something I"d have to have a discussion about with Konstantin when he got out of the shower, but all my plans were interrupted when his duffel bag began ringing.