Kokoro Connect

Chapter 5 - The Striving Act of Kiriyama Yui

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Chapter 5 - The Striving Act of Kiriyama Yui

The P.E. cla.s.s sessions in Yamabos.h.i.+ High were made up of students from two cla.s.ses.

Kiriyama Yui"s (and Aoki Yos.h.i.+fumi"s) cla.s.s, cla.s.s 1A, and Inaba Himeko, Nagase Iori, Yaegas.h.i.+ Taichi"s cla.s.s, cla.s.s 1C, were in the same session. In other words, all five members of the CRC would be present in the same cla.s.s. For Yui, this was something to antic.i.p.ate for. She had always enjoyed sports, combined with that other fact, P.E. became Yui"s favourite cla.s.s.

The first year girl students were having a football game.

The whistle sounded, and the second half of the match began.

This was a game between Team A cla.s.s 1A and Team B cla.s.s 1C.

"Yui, catch!"

A teammate pa.s.sed the ball to Yui.

Yui caught the ball with her right foot, and dribbled the ball forward in a series of agile steps. She charged into the opposing team"s territory, the ball stayed close by her foot.

Players from the other team approached her from the front, attempting to flank her.

But they were not members from the football club, their defence were nothing in face of Yui. She breezed through the opponent"s field, swiftly dodging any incoming opposing players, and shot!

"Eek!" The goalkeeper squeezed out a weak whimper and ducked aside. The ball entered the keeper-less goal, the impact even shook up the entire gate.

"Yay!"

Yui made a victory gesture with her hands.

"Nice shot, Yui... But, could you not unleash your prowess of pa.s.sing through five players in a row during P.E. cla.s.s?"

Yui"s good friend Yukina said to her with a complicated look on her face.

Fweet—— Fujis.h.i.+ma Maiko, the referee of the game, blew the whistle.

"Goal point! Team A cla.s.s 1A scores a point, and a special yellow card penalty for Kiriyama-san!"

"Eh? Why? What"s a special yellow card penalty?"

"No reason. Until I permit it, Kiriyama-san you are forbidden to enter the opponent team"s territory. Please limit your range of activity within your team"s half of the field."

"What kind of special rule is that? That"s ridiculous! Don"t everyone agree?"

Despite Yui"s protest, everyone including her teammates showed no hint of objection.

"Yui, if you go all out, the game would be completely one-sided..."

Yui was baffled that Yukina, of all people, told her that.

I"ve been holding back the first half, so I just wanted to get in the game a little during the second half, that"s all there is... Pfft!

However, Yui restrained herself from advancing anyway, and remained a back line support, pa.s.sing the ball to her teammates. After all, it was only a cla.s.s, she should cooperate with everyone else.

It was an easy task for Yui, and for that reason, she was free enough to peer at the neighbouring field.

As her eyes followed that certain someone, she quickly realised one thing:

——No one was pa.s.sing the ball to Iori.

There was n.o.body guarding her and her teammates seemed to be aware of it too. Yet, no one pa.s.sed the ball to her. Iori would normally be the most central and enthusiastic figure during the P.E. cla.s.ses, but now...

It was as though she was being ignored.

Iori"s expression was very gloomy. She had been that way lately.

"Yui! Look out!"

Yui responded to her teammate"s warning, and saw an opposing player attempting to dribble pa.s.s around her. Yui took one, two step, closing on the other player, swiftly stole the ball from her and pa.s.sed it to her teammate.

"S-Such precise movements in such a short time frame..."

Yukina was murmuring something, but did not seem to be talking to her, so Yui did not give much thought to it.

Yui looked towards the neighbouring field again.

Iori was still unable to join the offence line, but merely wandering at the back of the field.

At that moment...

"Ah!"

Iori was knocked over by one of her own teammate.

The girl responsible (Yui couldn"t remember her name, it was Setouchi or something) did not apologize to Iori either; she simply ran straight for the middle field.

"Was-Was that on purpose...?"

That looked nothing like an accident.

Before the end of the game, Team A cla.s.s 1A was one point behind. After Yui was permitted to join the offence line, she scored two points and won the game back for her team. The game ended. After cleaning up the field, the cla.s.s did stretching exercise, and concluded the P.E. cla.s.s.

Yui wanted to talk to Iori, but since they were on different fields she could not find the right opportunity to do so.

During Yui"s observation, Iori only talked to Inaba briefly and did not talk to anyone else. Yui thought Iori would usually be more cheerful and social.

Wait a minute, I thought Taichi"s close by? He could at least show up and say hi right? Iori is all by herself, is it really okay?

Though Yui understood that it might be difficult for Taichi, who was rejected, to do so.

"You"ve been watching Nagase-san the whole time."

Yukina said to Yui, and continued hesitantly:

"Um, I"ve been hearing that..."

"What?"

"There"s been some bad rumours about Nagase-san, something about she was pretending to be sweet, or seducing guys with her looks, and coldly rejecting others and such..."

"Yukina, you aren"t going to believe those rumours are you?"

"OK, OK, I get it, stop giving me that scary look! ...From what I heard from you, she"s supposed to be a very nice person. But, those who doesn"t know her well would easily believe those rum— ...I said stop giving me that look already!"

Who was it? Who was spreading those rumours about Iori?

On the way towards the locker room, Yui finally found a chance to talk to Iori.

"Hey, Iori."

"...What?"

"Uh..."

Ah, Yui did not know what to say.

[ Oh, that girl"s got some nice bust. ]

That pig head pervert Aoki who and where the h.e.l.l is he looking at and besides you are not supposed to judge a girl"s cuteness base on breast size actually what the h.e.l.l I"m busy stop interfering!

"Erm... About our cla.s.s just now... Mmph!"

Yui clasped her hands on her mouth. She brought up the topic in a flurry. However, for Iori right now, bring it up may not be a good idea.

Should I leave it... No, I mustn"t avoid her now—— Yui thought and decided to pursue.

"About our cla.s.s just now, you don"t seem alright."

Although Iori had already been like that lately to begin with.

"...No such thing."

"But no one"s been pa.s.sing the ball to you..."

It wasn"t just Iori. The people around her didn"t seem alright either.

"...It was just a coincident."

"Really? Did something strange hap—"

[ Stop it, stop talking to me. ]

It was Iori"s "Sentiment Transmission."

Confusing, chaotic feelings flowed into Yui"s mind.

Her legs were frozen.

Iori walked forward and left, but Yui was unable to bring herself to walk by Iori"s side.

From those sentiments she received, Yui could tell that something was troubling Iori, yet Yui did not understand what it was.

She had directly received the Iori"s feelings, yet Yui was unable to understand her.

She had shared the pain, yet Yui was unable to reach out to her.

This is just too sad... thought Yui, her hand clutching on her chest.

Even in face of finals preparation (in addition to Yui"s busy training at the dojo), the CRC members continued to work on their club presentation, namely the map that introduces recommended points of interest around the school.

"A cafe that serves as great dating spot yet not widely known, a Chinese restaurant that serves cheap and huge meals, a shop that sells cute accessories, a salon that"s small in scale but provides excellent services... And many more others. Wow, we"ve actually been visiting all these places. That"s amazing!"

Yui was impressed by everybody"s work.

"...Though I also see one that is obviously a personal point of interest... such as the gym that often organizes pro-wrestling matches."

Yui muttered quietly, but Taichi immediately reacted to her statement.

"What!? You didn"t know that particular gym had once organized one of the most important event in pro-wrestling hist——"

Before Taichi could finish, Inaba talked over him and said:

"These info booklets are coming out quite nicely. If we did some formal editing, we could sell them for money."

"Jeez, Inaba, you don"t have to keep on pulling things in that direction you know."

Yui ignored Taichi. Ah, he looked b.u.mmed out. Poor Taichi.

"To be honest though, we really shouldn"t have made our report data into booklets and then use these booklets as the basis of our oral report. We"ve been spending way too much time on making these booklets."

Inaba complained.

According to their plan, when the CRC exhibits the map during the presentation event, they would need booklets with detailed and organized information, as well as paper vellum to add to the impact of their oral report on stage.

Now, they had finally reached the stage to work on their paper vellum. Although they only needed to handcraft a simplistic, easy-to-understand map that summarizes the info and location of the points of interest with a design that would leave a good impression, the amount of data they had collected was overwhelming.

In the wide, s.p.a.cious media cla.s.sroom, in order to let the back row audience see clearly, the displaying text on the map must be enlarged. Hence, they prepared an exceptional amount of paper vellum (roughly 1 square meter each). And since the judges, who wanted to observe the reaction of the other students, would be sitting in the back, the CRC could not adjust the text size.

Truth to be told, they were somewhat tight on time.

"Is this t.i.tle text good enough, Inaba-chan?"

Aoki inquired Inaba in club room. The room was noisier and messier than usual.

"Yeah, that will do... Psh, now that you mention it, we"re probably stressing too much on the design, it"s so much ha.s.sle! I really shouldn"t have used professional-looking manuals like «Your Complete Guide to Advertis.e.m.e.nt Design» for references!"

Not only that. Inaba had even picked up books about typography and colour theories. Once got started she would want the best results——very true to Inaba"s style indeed. The whole process was tough. Should they finish the project, however, it would be a product that far exceeds the expectations of any normal high-schooler event (should such events exist). Yui felt it was a waste to only use it on the club presentation event.

"The amount of content is ridiculous! I kinda want to compromise a little... but if we lose because of that, I"ll kill myself! I hate losing!"

"Stop shaking, Inaba, you"re gonna mess up the text."

Taichi reminded a somewhat hysterical Inaba.

They worked together excitedly.

However, Iori, the president of the CRC as well as the cheer bringer, was not present.

Yui suddenly realised that fact.

Iori had not been showing up in the club room lately, and even when she did, she would leave after only a brief stay.

"Sentiment Transmission". This was the name of the phenomenon triggered by «Heartseed» this time.

They had this alarming occasion where everyone"s love affairs were brutally exposed, but the CRC managed to maintain its balance. Yui figured it was probably because they had already gotten used to it.

However, they were not able to evade the crisis unscathed. Iori especially, was the one who took the heaviest blow in this incident.

Judging by the time frame, Yui was certain that Iori"s issue had something to do with "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon. The negative rumours would have certain amount of impact on Iori as well.

What happened during the P.E. cla.s.s today might have hurt Iori deeply.

Even though she did not quite grasp it due to confusion, now that she thought it, the "Sentiment Transmission" that Yui received, Iori"s sentiment, was filled with immense sorrow.

"Yui, stop s.p.a.cing out! If you as the most handy person slacked off, we would never get it done even when we were able to do so to begin with!"

Inaba tapped Yui"s shoulder with her pen.

"Inaba... Just because you"re clumsy doesn"t mean you need to take it out on Kiriyama."

"Wha...! I absolutely was not trying to criticize nor take anything out on Yui with that statement just now don"t you jump to conclusions on your own and act like I"m the bad guy here Taichi! And don"t call me clumsy!"

"Wow, Inaba-chan is able to jab with such a long remark and not twist her tongue, that"s so cool!"

As they were bickering, Yui felt delighted to have such companions.

However...

"My bad, I was thinking about Iori... Ah."

Oh no... I shouldn"t have said that.

"Nagase you say..."

Taichi"s face turned sombre.

I really shouldn"t have said that. I"m sorry.

Inaba spoke:

"This was that b.a.s.t.a.r.d"s gimmick after all... Something"s bound to happen. Even if this phenomenon doesn"t directly affect the outside world, with that its severeness isn"t as dreadful when compared with ones we"ve gone through before, the fact still remains. Not to mention "Sentiment Transmission" will also... No, forget I said th——"

[ Terrifying... It"s terrifying... Really terrifying... ]

It was Inaba"s "Sentiment Transmission," a sentiment filled with extreme anxiety and fear, one that would easily crush one"s heart.

Look of panic flickered across Inaba"s face.

However, that look immediately vanished without a trace. Inaba fixated her eyes on Yui.

Under those slender eyelashes, her limpid eyes gazed into Yui"s with a strong, determined will.

——No need to say anything. I"m fine.

Yui could feel Inaba saying that to her.

Inaba cleared her throat, and said:

"...Anyway, fortunately enough for me, things that could seriously affect me at the present, "things that I don"t want others to know", have not yet run into "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon so far. Should that happen though... Actually, I don"t want to think about it. This may have happened to Iori already, ...though I still don"t understand what it is."

Even though she was so worried, Inaba continued to put on her upright demeanour.

Yui knew Inaba was a worrier.

But Yui never expected her to be constantly living in fear like this.

Not to mention, Inaba never let any bit of those emotion surface. She would always put on a strong front so that the rest of them would feel a.s.sured.

Yui had always thought Inaba to be a strong and amazing person. But now she also realised that all these times Inaba had been battling hard against her own weakness, urging herself to be strong.

Yui never knew Inaba had been striving so hard.

Had she been unknowingly living under Inaba"s shelter all these time? The shelter of whom had been striving so hard for their sake?

The club room entered a moment of silence. The air became heavy.

The one to shatter that gloomy atmosphere, was Aoki with his cheerful, carefree voice.

"Anyhow~ Iori-chan would know to ask for help when she"s in need. We"ll just wait till then! And when Iori-chan does ask for our help, we"ll reach out for her headstrong! That"s all we can do now!"

Aoki a.s.serted confidently.

The sharp contrast in mood startled Yui, but she immediately caught on Aoki"s intention, and smiled:

"I suppose you"re right."

This man was able to change any mood by his will alone.

Even though he acted naturally, Aoki must have had his moment of doubt and fought hard before. Yui deeply respected his nothing-to-lose att.i.tude.

[ It"s what I like about you, you know. ]

"Wha...!"

Why did "Sentiment Transmission" transmit that one part of my thoughts!? And the receivers had to be Aoki, Inaba, and Taichi too!

"Y-Yui... Was that "Sentiment Transmission" just now for real? ...No wait, it"s "Sentiment Transmission" so it"s gotta be real! YESSSSHHHH! Yui is finally sending me signal of lov——Mmph!?"

Yui stuffed Aoki"s mouth with a ball of paper to shut him up.

"Fweh...! (Cough)... What you do that for? I was only trying to state the truth!"

"Shut up! I was only referring to one of your traits! Don"t get any funny ideas!"

"...Well I sure haven"t seen such an obvious tsundere before."

"Not just tsundere, your face is completely red too, Kiriyama."

"Inaba and Taichi both need to shut up as well! I"m gonna start kicking people you know!"

Everyone"s laughing~ My cheeks are burning up~ Stop laughing already~

Yui puffed her cheeks and started throwing a fit, so everyone else apologized to Yui one by one.

If they think apologizing would make me forgive them, they"re dead wrong... Even though I would forgive them anyway.

"But, like Aoki said."

Taichi spoke.

"I believe right now, the only thing that we should and can do for Nagase is... to protect the CRC. Nagase is the president of CRC. Therefore, let"s continue to work hard on our club presentation for now."

Taichi was rejected by Iori, yet he said that for Iori"s sake with a strong and earnest will.

Due to "Sentiment Transmission", Yui knew how hard it was for Taichi to be rejected.

Yet, he continued to speak for Iori"s sake... Even though "the only thing" part sounded a little pessimistic.

Yui felt a burning desire ignited within her.

She did not want to lose to Aoki, who had been striving his best.

She wanted to share the burden of Inaba and Taichi, who had been striving their best.

She wanted to help Iori, who had been struggling over something.

She had been living under the shelter of everyone else, but Yui had decided: She would become strong. From now on, she wanted to protect them with her own hands.

She must fight, and fight hard. Otherwise, she would never be on equal grounds with them.

The question was, what could she do now?

"...Can I head off for today?"

"Don"t be ridiculous. If we lose you today, we"ll fall behind schedule."

As expected, Inaba reprimanded her, but Yui"s decision remained firm.

"It"s alright, I promise I"ll work extra hard to make it up afterwards."

Yui packed up her tools. She put her stationary in her case and stood up.

"You alright, Yui? Do you need my help?"

"No, I"ll be enough by myself."

Yui declined Aoki"s help.

"Oi, oi, Kiriyama, I don"t think you should be so reckless..."

"I"ll be fine! And Taichi you"re not the one to talk here!"

Yui ignored Taichi"s warning.

"Dammit Yui, didn"t I say hold on?"

Lastly, Inaba stood in front of the door, blocking Yui"s way.

"I can harness a guess at what you"re about to do..."

Inaba scratched her head and muttered.

"But, I don"t think this is a good time for that."

Inaba"s expression was serious.

"If she has the need, she would say so herself. And more importantly... I think it"s dangerous."

"Dangerous? Why?"

"Because you..."

Inaba stopped halfway, and lowered her head.

"I"ll be fine, Inaba. I"ve become stronger."

Yui smiled at Inaba.

Inaba knit her brows in hesitation, but eventually her expression softened.

"I"ll be off then!"

Yui ran past Inaba and departed.

"I"m gonna head straight for your home now!"

Yui notified Iori with a call and hopped on the train towards Iori"s house.

She wanted to talk to Iori properly.

Merely listening to pieces or limiting herself to greetings was not enough.

She must talk directly to Iori, face to face.

The others were being considerate for Iori, but they seemed to be leaning towards the pa.s.sive spectrum.

——If she has the need, she would say so herself.

It was an entirely logical take.

However, there was a chance that even Iori herself didn"t know what went wrong. She could have been in a pinch where she could not ask for help on her own.

Everyone were most likely aware of this. But if they delve in too much, they might end up pus.h.i.+ng her into a corner. Sometimes it might be better to let her cool her head a little. Not to mention it was Iori"s inner problem, there was nothing they could do. And combining with "Sentiment Transmission"... Ugh! Whatever! Yui dismissed her contemplation.

However, she also believed that there are things that can"t be understood without direct confrontation.

Not to mention, no choice is guaranteed.

Even with so many uncertainty, the most important thing is the courage to take the first step.

She, too, could fight hard. She would fight hard for everyone else to see.

She could do the same.

As she was thinking to herself, she had arrived at the station.

After a bit of walking from the gate, Yui saw Iori coming from the front.

"Ah, Iori."

Yui rushed towards her.

"I"m sorry for suddenly calling you like this, saying stuff like I"m heading straight for your home and having you pick me up..."

"It"s alright." Iori replied.

Her expression was flat. She did not smile at Yui.

Iori"s face, which looked perfect like a crafted piece of art. After it lost its usual vibrant color, it remained beautiful, yet became a little frightening as well.

She figured it would be inconvenient to converse in the middle of the walkway, hence Yui decided to relocate at a nearby restaurant"s parking lot.

Yui did not enter the restaurant, as she planned to return to the club room right afterwards.

Iori was the one who spoke first.

"We"ve been through this before, haven"t we? Though our positions have reversed compared to then."

"Eh?" Yui did not catch on for a moment, but she soon realised what Iori meant.

"Ahh, yeah."

It happened during the "Desire Unleash" phenomenon. Yui had shut herself up in her room, refused to go to school and caused many problems for the others.

At that time, Iori was the most persistent among them. She ran all over the place for them, visited Yui multiple times despite her rejection.

She had fought very hard for me, which is why it"s my turn to do the same now, thought Yui.

"Eh, Iori, about "Sentiment Transmission"... What do you think of it?"

"What I think...?"

"Uh, I mean, are you feeling troubled or hurt?"

"This is... indeed very troubling."

"C-Can you be more specific?"

"Isn"t troubling, painful, a good enough answer?"

Iori stared impa.s.sively towards somewhere near Yui"s chest.

...This isn"t going to be easy. This is harder than expected.

Yui paused for a moment and took a deep breath.

"Iori you seem extremely sad though, and you seemed to be in deep pain."

Yui felt it through "Sentiment Transmission".

"I wish to do something for you, Iori."

"I don"t think there"s anything you can do."

Iori brutally rejected Yui"s benevolence, but Yui was not about to give up.

"Hey, is something wrong, Iori? You used to work harder than anyone, smile more than anyone and cheer for everyone, yet you"ve been looking so gloomy lately. Iori, I"ve always been indebted to you! Even just a little, I want to help you return to normal, I——"

"What the h.e.l.l is there to return normal!?"

Iori retorted in a rude tone.

"Yui haven"t seen anything, you don"t know anything, you"ve never noticed! No, not just Yui, you"re all the same! Everyone... None of you saw the real me."

Iori"s voice began to tremble at the end.

"...What do you mean?"

"I"m... tired... It"s too late. I can"t keep up anymore... I can"t."

Stop saying "can"t," stop looking so sad please...

"It can"t be too late, and besides, what you mean you can"t, of course you——"

[ I can"t be Yui"s friend anymore. ]

You"re lying! Why? There"s no such thing! Don"t talk like that.

Even if it were sentiments from Iori, even if it meant those feelings were real, Yui would not accept it. She would not accept it. Would not accept it.

"I love Iori... This will never change..."

If only she could let Iori feel this sentiment through "Sentiment Transmission," Yui thought.

"...No matter how much I changed?"

"Of course."

"Even if I changed completely?"

"Yes."

"Then, what makes Yui want to be friends with me? If I changed completely, with no trace of what I was before, wouldn"t I be like a complete stranger?"

In other words... It was difficult to grasp, but Yui understood her.

"We still have our memories, don"t we?"

"So as long as they were friends before, no matter how corrupted one of them has become, say a criminal, they would still remain friends?"

"Uh... Er..."

Is this a debate? How should I counter that? How should I answer? This is frightening. What should I do, what should I do——

[ Iori isn"t that kind of people. ]

"Ah..."

It was Yui"s own "Sentiment Transmission" towards Iori.

How? Why? Yui did not know the reason, but her instinct told her that this thought must never be forwarded to Iori.

However, what was sent out could never be taken back.

It was no a wrong choice of words, nor an impulsive remark, but rather the truest truthful feeling.

[ That is why I can"t be Yui"s friend anymore. I can"t, I can"t... ]

"Sentiment Transmission" triggered again. Iori"s feelings flowed into Yui. It was sorrowful and lonely and bitter and lonesome and heavy and desolate and painful as if her body was being torn to shreds.

At that moment, Yui seemed to have understood why Inaba warned her that it was "dangerous" back at the club room.

Under "Sentiment Transmission", should these feelings that were buried deep within each other"s heart were exchanged, what would happen?

When both parties" thoughts become translucent and open, their true selves would be completely exposed. They could not afford to let this kind of conversation take place.

Yui and Iori, an apparent gap had begun to emerge between them.

She had failed.

She was powerless.

She could see no way to reach into Iori"s frozen heart.

She could no longer try.

——Somebody help me.

Yui dragged herself heavily along the dark street under the night.

She contracted her body, s.h.i.+elding herself from the cold wind as much as possible, and clenched then loosen her fingers in her gloves. There had already been traces of spring"s arrival during the day. Yet, it was painstakingly cold during the night, as though wanting to freeze anyone who dared to walk in the open cold.

But Yui wanted to walk home on foot anyway.

Inaba and the others should have headed home by now.

She ended up skipping the club activity, Yui felt a little guilty for that.

She thought she was confident, believed she could complete her objective, yet she only succeeded in widening the wound.

She was confident, but it appeared she was merely self-indulgent.

Her cell phone vibrated. Someone was calling her. Yui took off the glove from her right hand and examined the screen.

The caller was Mihas.h.i.+ Chinatsu.

She was Yui"s rival in karate during grade school and middle school. They had been apart for a while, but after reuniting and going through a series of conflicts during the winter break, the two had become friends.

Yui picked up the call. She felt it might be a long conversation, so she took refuge from the cold in a near by bus station"s waiting room.

After Yui listened to Chinatsu, she began discussing her own issue. Needless to say, she avoided mentioning anything about «Heartseed» or the phenomena, and glossed through most of the details.

The heat waiting room was warm, and there was n.o.body else in there.

"——That"s about it. Chinatsu, what do you think I should do?"

"Well, it"s difficult for me to say since I don"t know the details... But honestly, I think it"s better to leave it alone. Time can solve a lot of things you know."

"I can"t do that! I can"t..."

Yui thought it would be irresponsible.

"...That being said though, I didn"t call you to listen to this you know, didn"t I say I have things to talk to you about as well?"

"My problem is more dire though!"

"It may be dire, but I"m an outsider, there isn"t much I can do you know."

"Chinatsu you"re so uncaring."

"Yes, yes, I"m uncaring I know. I thought you of all people should know that already."

"But I"m really troubled! Help me out already!"

"Ha!" Chinatsu laughed on the other end of the phone. "What? Even till now, you are still relying on others?"

Relying on others. These three words echoed clearly in Yui"s mind.

"N-No! I tried, but it didn"t work..."

"...Sorry, I was a bit jumpy. Yui must be working hard too, so——"

Disruptive, electric noise sounded suddenly.

The voice from the other end of the phone faded, and the conversation ended.

A low-battery alert was displayed on the phone screen.

"...b.u.mmer."

Unfortunately, Yui did not bring any spare battery.

She sat alone in the waiting room.

She was drenching in sweat. The heat seemed too powerful. Such a waste of energy, she thought.

The sound of sliding door came.

The cold air from the outside rushed into the waiting room and collided with Yui"s cheeks that were red from the heat.

——Thuk, thuk.

Footsteps. Yui lifted her head.

Only to find herself face to face with what appeared to be an expressionless CRC club advisor Gotou Ryuuzen——

——«Heartseed» was standing before her.

"Ah... Ah... Ahh..."

Yui thought her heart stopped beating. No, it did stop beating for a moment. She was sure of it. She could not breathe. She was terrified. Then her heart started pounding at a frightening speed. Her face was burning. Her face was freezing. Was it hot or cold? Her hands couldn"t stop s.h.i.+vering.

"...Good afternoon, Kiriyama-san... Oh? It"s evening right now, should I say good evening? Ahh... I still haven"t gotten used to greeting yet, I suppose I shouldn"t push myself like that..."

A tone that was sluggish and flat, a voice that was both sticky and dry, an air that reeked of negative abnormality——

Help me! Yui thought she was going to be swallowed whole.

A different kind of sweat began to drench her.

"...What"s wrong, Kiriyama-san? You don"t look very well... not that it concerns me..."

Was he trying to ask her a question or not? Was he concerned or not?

"Am I over thinking? ...It seems the number of times I"ve seen Kiriyama-san is much less than that of the others... We never had many chances to converse either..."

He was right. During both the "Desire Unleash" and "Time Regression" phenomena, Yui did not interact with «Heartseed». When he showed up to explain the phenomenon this time, Yui felt it was like eternity since the last time she faced him. Though, at the time, everyone was present, and now she was alone.

"Er... If you don"t say something... it"s gonna end up looking like my personal talk show with me talking to myself... Not that it hasn"t happened already..."

"W-What do you want?"

Yui managed to squeeze words out of her throat.

She and «Heartseed» were the only ones in the waiting room. «Heartseed» was blocking the entrance. If she wanted to escape, she had to get pa.s.s around him.

Yui heard «Heartseed» appeared to Aoki when he was alone. Because of that, Inaba had warned them to be extra careful as it might happen again.

But Yui did not take it to heart despite being directly involved. She was too careless.

Should she bring herself to fight him head on? No, she could not win that way. Yui understood it well. After all, «Heartseed» had subdued her with his overwhelming power.

"Ahh... Please don"t start a fight... I don"t want any trouble here..."

Did he see through her mind?

"Well then... Kiriyama-san... About the phenomenon this time, what do you think of it?"

What was the meaning of that question?

"...Are you not afraid?"

I"m afraid. Of course I"m afraid, Yui thought. «Heartseed"s» presence alone was frightening enough. It was all too bizarre to begin with.

"The fact your most hidden secrets would be exposed in the air, are you not afraid?"

His tone was becoming a.s.sertive and strong. Why?

"Most hidden..."

It was terrible. Yui knew how much the phenomenon could hurt people. Iori was hurt, and Yui felt she hurt Iori as well. By sharing Iori"s dark and cold sentiment, Yui knew Iori was hurt, and herself as well along the way.

Eventually, everyone would find out.

It was as though she was stripped naked. without any protection. Her dirty side, her awful side, would all be exposed, and would become hated and shamed——Yui realised she had just caught a glimpse of the worst outcome.

Yui knew it was an extremely dreadful scenario. Hence she tried not to look at it, think of it nor aware of it. They had decided on that together since the beginning.

It was because once they would realise it, they would be sucked into it, like a person would in a quicksand. Hence they tried to maintain a common heart. They had gotten used to it in a certain sense, which was why they managed to hold on. However, Yui herself was now trapped in the quicksand.

What should I do? What should I do? She realised it and could no longer stop it. Jealousy, envy, contempt, denial, disgust... Her negative emotions began to surge within her.

«Heartseed», with Gotou"s appearance, was piercing through her with his murky gaze.

[ Help me. ]

"Sentiment Transmission" triggered.

Her feelings forwarded to Aoki and Taichi.

Thank goodness, she thought. She would be safe now. They would help her. They may not know where she is, but they would definitely find their way. She could be at ease. It will be fine, she told herself. Her friends would help her...

——Even till now, you are still relying on others?

Chinatsu"s voice rang in Yui"s ears.

The voice was so clear, for a moment Yui thought the "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon triggered. Needless to say, it was not the case.

Don"t want to lose.

It was the only thing in Yui"s mind.

Even if she was about to lose, or feeling painful, wanting to cry, facing terrible odds... She did not want to lose.

She wanted to become a stronger person.

The fire rekindled within her, and Yui remembered.

——I won"t lose to anyone or anything anymore!"

She had sworn that to herself.

What she needed to say was not "Help me."

Yui stood up.

She placed her moved her left food and arm forward.

She lifted her hand at the height of her chin.

Yui braced and stood in battle stance.

She contracted her abdomen, and stared at «Heartseed».

"...What are you trying to do..."

"I"m scared, and I hate the "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon from my gut, but I"ve already made up my mind. I will not run away. And besides, I"ve already got an embarra.s.sing enough record to begin with, I doubt it could get any worse."

Huh, «Heartseed» doesn"t seem so frightening anymore, she thought.

"Everyone is doing their best. I, too, can fight hard."

Inaba, Aoki, Taichi... and Iori as well.

Yui realised one very important thing.

The ideal words to a companion, was not "Help me," nor "I will do my best on my own."

The ideal words would be "Let"s do our best together."

"...I see, it seems it would have no effect no matter what I say... Ahh... How should I put it..."

«Heartseed"s» shoulders that were already quite slanted dropped even more. His lazy expression became lazier... Or should one say, he looked dejected?

"...This is probably not the best idea... And besides, I"m getting bored of it, should I call it then? ...More importantly, it"s such a ha.s.sle. But to interact directly... Ahh."

«Heartseed», as though realising something, nodded his head.

"...So it was exactly because of this... that that one wanted to b.u.t.t in... No, no, should I say I"m becoming interesting as well? ..."

That one? Did he mean «Number Two»? Becoming interesting? Does that mean «Heartseed» is changing as well?

"That being said... Kiriyama-san have become stronger, haven"t you... That would probably make you even less interesting than Aoki-san... Or should I say that was actually quite interesting? Next time should be..."

"Hey."

"Ahh..."

"Can you stop talking to yourself like I"m not here? Do you have anymore business with me?"

She was able to converse normally now. She was actually quite bold after all, Yui thought to herself. Though she might argue that it was just a side effect of feeling numb.

"No... It"s... settled... Good bye."

"...Good bye."

He greeted her. Now that she thought of it, «Heartseed» had been greeting her both at the start and the end, as though he was treating her like a friend.

«Heartseed» turned around and exited the waiting room.

The door slid shut.

As the door slid shut, Yui collapsed and sat on the floor.

"Ahh~ That was scary——"

Yui never dreamt she would be facing off against «Heartseed» on her own. She managed it, and she had this weird sense of accomplishment. Yet, she still felt——

[ That was scary. ]

"Sentiment Transmission" triggered again.

[ Where!? ] [ Where!? ]

This time, it was "Sentiment Transmission" from both Aoki and Taichi.

Jeez them two are nosy, even though I was the one who asked for help to begin with.

Yui replied half-jokingly in her head.

[ In the bus waiting room nearest to my house! ]

Ah, it was Yui"s "Sentiment Transmission" this time.

...It"s almost like we"re talking through telepathy.

Seemed like a practical way to utilize "Sentiment Transmission"

Yui wanted to tell them that she no longer need help, but she did not have any other contact methods, so she could only stay at her spot and wait. She tried focusing her mind in hopes of triggering "Sentiment Transmission" to send out a message, but the phenomenon seemed to be ignoring her at the moment.

"Puff... Puff... Are you... Are you alright, Kiriyama!?"

Taichi was the first to arrive.

Aren"t you supposed to be doing everything you can to arrive the scene first, Aoki...? Yui thought. Man, this is one thing that he sucks at.

But judging by the situation, it probably couldn"t be helped. After all, Aoki could be coming from home or somewhere out in town. No, perhaps it was a simple case that Taichi happened to know how to make a perfect entrance.

"Er... Sorry, Taichi. But I"m fine now."

Yui planned to relay the details tomorrow, so she skimped through some details and briefly told Taichi what happened.

"I see... He really did appeared quite a number of times this round. I"m guessing his next target would be me or Inaba or Nagase...?"

"He said he was getting bored of it, so he probably won"t show up again."

"...Getting bored?"

Yui couldn"t blame Taichi for feeling puzzled.

"Say, Taichi."

Yui, still savouring what she had learned during her confrontation, spoke to Taichi.

"Ever since «Heartseed» started those strange phenomena, everyone has been working hard no? But when I compare myself to you guys, I feel like I haven"t done anything. So I wanted to work even harder."

"I believe Kiriyama to have worked hard as well."

"Thank you. But, you guys only thought of protecting me, but you never felt the need to be protected by me, am I right?"

"Uh..."

Truth to be told, Taichi was not exactly the most expressive person in the world, but any s.h.i.+ft in emotion would be immediately written on his face, thus making him very easy to read. He was a very fun person to be with.

"I didn"t want to stay like that, which was why I ignored Inaba"s warning and tried to talk to Iori... but I failed."

She felt the need to acknowledge her mistakes.

"Failed, you say... I failed too. I was completely... rejected by Nagase."

Taichi"s face became sombre.

"I didn"t understand Nagase at all... Which is why... there"s nothing I could do for her."

"That"s not true! Iori must be waiting for Taichi to reach out for her!"

"But she doesn"t seem to wish that way at all... What"s there for me to do...?"

"Taichi, you"ve been really useless lately."

Was she becoming emotional? Yui wondered why Taichi was backing slightly away from her.

"You used to be a lot more persevering in these matters."

Taichi had become more reserved, most likely due to growth, because Taichi had become more considerate of his surroundings. If he was like before, recklessly charging ahead like a dummy, it would be a headache for Yui as well... Such as kicking himself in his source of life!

"Speaking of which, Taichi, how could you turn a blind eye on Iori like that? Can"t you see what"s happening to her in cla.s.s?"

"That"s because..."

Yui attempted to get words out from him, and she managed to hit right at the point.

Is that so? Iori"s already involved in such a troubling situation, in fact it may be a lot worse than I expected.

"By the way, I just thought of something... Taichi said earlier today, that the only thing we can do for Iori is "to continue to work hard on our club presentation." Don"t you think it"s a bit pathetic coming from you?"

Of course, Yui could sympathize with the view on not to push Iori too much before she was willing to ask for help. But looking from a different angle, it was the same as abandoning her to her own. Iori"s inner issue may be a difficult wall at the moment, but there must be something they could do about the external issues right?

"I want to do something for Nagase as well, but I don"t know what she really wished for..."

Maybe.

Iori had been difficult lately.

Yui could sympathize with Taichi, but something about this conversation began to infuriate her.

"I failed miserably... I... What am I supposed to do...?"

Boom—— Yui exploded.

"Quit acting like a whiny pansy already! Are you a man or not!? You think you"re the only one feeling lost in here!? I tried too! And I failed like a pile of goo!"

Yui was fuming with steam, there was no stopping to her rage.

"So what if you failed!? You should be thinking about what to do so that you won"t fail next time!"

The same could be said to herself.

"Truth to be told, I have no right to lecture you here! But you"re just being ridiculous now, I just gotta yell at you for that you know!? You"re thinking I look like some hysterical woman right now, aren"t you? Then stop making me play this kind of ugly character you fool!"

"...Eh? Uh... Sorry."

"You think apologizing will make it alright!? You think that"s all there is!? Even though in the end, I will of course... forgive you anyway!"

"Th-Thank you..."

Taichi said with a "What the heck is she trying to tell me" look on his face, much to Yui"s chagrin.

They did not say another word, and entered a brief period of awkward silence.

I must have blabbered many irresponsible things... Yui reflected. She had only just made such a terrible mistake in front of Iori earlier. Was it really the right thing to do? Did she do anything wrong...?

"Hey, Kiriyama."

After a while, Taichi spoke while looking at Yui straight in the eyes. His were a pair of straightforward and honest eyes, Yui thought she was almost mesmerized... Hold on, it was not the "love" sort of like. Nope.

"Let"s do our best together."

Ahh, I see. Taichi understood too.

Not having someone to strive for your sake, and not striving on your own either, but rather having everyone to strive together.

This is the true form of companions.h.i.+p.

Kiriyama Yui believed as such.

"Let"s do our best together."

If Taichi... If she had companions who were willing to work hard together with her, Yui, too, would be able to strive hard.

"I don"t understand Nagase right now at all, Not to mention the current situation around her, it was as though she wished for it to happen... But still, I can"t leave her alone like that."

"I don"t know what to do for Iori either, not to mention if I interfered too much, it has the potential to turn even uglier. But... let"s do our best anyway."

Yui concluded, to which Taichi smiled happily at.

Yui smiled in return.

"I thought I was powerless after being rejected... You"re right though, there"s nothing we couldn"t do!"

Hearing Taichi say that, Yui was very happy. She nodded her head sharply in agreement and said:

"Yup!"

[ Yui~ I"m almost there~ ]

Aoki"s "Sentiment Transmission" finally came.

...You"re too slow!

Things refused to go smoothly since the morning.

As soon as I arrived at school, I found my desk scrawled all over. It was easy to clean up, so it wasn"t much of a problem. But as I was cleaning, n.o.body tried to help. It seemed they did not want to get involved. If Taichi or Inaba were here, it might have been a different scene.

Not to mention, I had a fight with my mother in the morning, and broke my favorite hair disc. Combining with these external factors, I felt like I"d hit the rock bottom. My mood could not get any worse.

Needless to say, it is exactly days like this that trouble would choose to find you.

[ I can"t be the only one running away now. They were all striving their best, I too should—— ]

At noon, I heard the inner voice of Inaba Himeko. And after school, Inaba walked straight at me.

Can you pick any worse timing than this? I thought.

I was beyond moody; my state of mind was shrouded in complete darkness and melancholy.

"Iori, can you tell me what"s going on already? It has gone past the point where I could turn a blind eye on you, you know."

"Then, why have you waited till now to ask me?"

I asked. She startled.

I did not want to talk to her like that.

Yet I could no longer stop myself from doing that.

From that one statement of mine alone, Inaba"s eyes wavered.

Inaba did not seem to have a plan beforehand. There was a hesitant air around her, perhaps Inaba was in her "weak" state.

"...I can"t blame you for saying that. I"m sorry. I didn"t know what to do either. I"ve asked myself, what can I do in this situation? Not to mention, you"ve changed so much..."

Changed so much.

Changed.

No, I had changed.

I spoke:

"Sure, what are you gonna do then?"

Why did I choose to speak like that? Normal people would not do that. I could not even be normal any more.

"Iori, can you tell me? What you really think?"

Inaba clenched her teeth, and pursued.

"...Even if I don"t tell you, "Sentiment Transmission" will send my thoughts to you anyway."

"Those are only glimpses of our thoughts, not the whole picture. I can"t tell the truth with these fragments alone. So please, can you tell me everything?"

"Why must I tell Inaba everything?"

"...!"

Inaba"s face paled from shock. She was beginning to break. Indeed, she was weak. Too weak. It was painful to watch. Too painful.

Inaba, her eyes wavered and filled with tears, shook her head. Was she trying to pretend she didn"t hear those words just now? Was she trying to stand up once more?

"Iori... You"ve saved me before, hence I want to save you too. "Save" might sound a little pretentious, but even so..."

Inaba clenched her fist.

"We are friends, aren"t we? Friends should help each other right? You don"t have to worry, we can help you!"

"Stop imposing your ideals on me."

I replied flatly.

"Imposing... what do you mean by that? You should know—"

Inaba"s voice began to fill with anger.

""You should know"... Isn"t that exactly what imposing means?"

"W-What happened to you!? You weren"t the type of people who would say that! You would be more... You wouldn"t be like this at all!"

Not the type of people who would say that.

Not like this at all.

Not like this.

I could no longer display the side that wasn"t like that.

No longer. No more.

Inaba became very emotional.

"Something is really wrong with you, you know that!? You"ve been acting like this since you rejected Taichi! I know it"s hard to keep a common heart in face of the "Sentiment Transmission" phenomenon. I"m scared too! I feel painful, tired, helpless... But why!? Besides, did you have to reject Taichi? Didn"t you like Taichi too—"

Like I said, that"s called——

[ Imposing. ]

"...Eh?"

Inaba uttered a sound of puzzlement.

This was my "Sentiment Transmission" to Inaba.

Dark and murky feelings began to surge within me.

If Inaba wants everything from me, then I"ll give it to her.

I ignored the voice in my head This is just hateful venting, and said:

"Aren"t you the one being absurd here? You hooked me up with Taichi, forced us to notice each other."

My words pierced through her like a dagger.

"You kept nagging about pairing us together. Then when I actually wanted to take on the relations.h.i.+p, you went "I love him too" and joined in."

"Ah... Ah..."

Inaba trembled. She held herself tight, as though consumed by a dreadful chill.

"But as soon as I said I don"t want to go out with Taichi, you started fussing again. What were you trying to do? What did you want?"

I ignored my own actions, and continued:

"Can you be any more irresponsible? You stirred with my feelings, then b.u.t.t in and interfered, and made everything a mess. Have you ever considered my feelings? What were you thinking?"

How was I able to speak those words so casually? I felt I was the most terrible person in the world.

Inaba finally broke, and collapsed on her knee.

[ I"m sorry I"m sorry I"m sorry I"m sorry I"m sorry I"m sorry... ]

I could hear Inaba"s voice.

Regrets. Remorse. Guilt. Self-reproach. Apology. Apology. Apology.

Inaba"s feelings flowed into me.

It was painful, agonizing, sorrowful. My chest was going to rip. I wanted to comfort her and say "It"s alright."

But I would not say it. I could no longer say it. The current me was unable to say it.

A sentiment suddenly came to me. It was from Yaegas.h.i.+ Taichi, who was not present at the scene.

[ I am not alone, I must do my best for Nagase"s sake. ]

So pa.s.sionate. So bright. So dignified.

For me, however, it was very painful and agonizing.

Please, stop it. I whispered in my heart.

I was not resolved. I was not worthy.

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