Chuckling, I pressed against his chest and leaned back. Where are we supposed to live, since you are in such a hurry to whisk me away?
How would you like to move back into your childhood home? Half of it belongs to me now.
What of Viriato?
He is welcome to live with us if he wishes. Would you mind?
I cant think of a better solution. He is like a brother to me.
Then pack your belongings, my bride. I am going to visit Chuza right away.
My brow puckered. Shouldnt we talk to Rachel first? She might not want to have a new mother. It might be better if we gave her some time to grow used to me.
Ethan gave me a lopsided smile. Dont start coming up with excuses now. You were doing so well. I have already talked to Rachel. She is a little anxious, as you might expect. But she is as happy as I for you to become part of our lives.
I was busy packing when Calvus arrived at my door. This time, Keziah was with me, and I expected Ethan to arrive at any moment. He had deposited Rachel with Joanna for a tour of the palace grounds and taken the opportunity to visit a merchant who might be interested in purchasing cloth from the workshop.
I felt no fear at the sight of the Roman. Not even the smallest shiver of alarm or shudder of dislike went through me. Since having prayed for him, I could not help but pity him every time he came to mind, which was rare. Not bothering to straighten from my packing, I said, What brings you to my door, Decimus Calvus?
So it is true. You are leaving.
I am. Ethan and I are to be married in Jerusalem as soon as we arrive.
Did he set his mousy wife aside for you?
I straightened with a sigh and rubbed my back. Sarai died years ago. And she was lovely.
Calvus shrugged. She was nothing to you. He had a whip in his hand, which he flicked against his boot. They say you are cured.
Do you believe in miracles, Calvus?
No.
You are looking at one. A Jewish prophet healed me.
You Jews and your prophets. There is one hiding under every bush.
I laughed. Not like this one. He even helps Roman centurions.
I dont need the help of some zealot from the backwaters of Galilee.
You might change your mind if you met him, I said, and turned to the next box that Keziah had hauled out of our curtained nook. Not recognizing it, I flipped open the lid and peered inside. Look at this! I had forgotten about this box. Twelve years ago when we left Jerusalem, my mother insisted on dragging it along with us. Its full of the workshops old papers and account books. I bet Ethan will want to go through every sc.r.a.p.
Calvus walked over and peered inside. Make a bonfire of it. Its old rubbish. Hardly worth dragging back to Jerusalem after so long. His mouth had become a straight line, rigid with tension.
I sighed. I fear Ethan will not agree. I closed the lid and pushed the box aside and pulled over a pile of pots to sort through. Keziah, I called out. Let us give the kitchen furnishings to the poor. The house in Jerusalem will already be stocked with what we need.
Keziah, who was working in the next room, said, I have a pile here as well. I will take care of them later.
When do you leave? Calvus asked.
The day after tomorrow. Early in the morning.
Calvus drew close. You were ever a thorn in my side, Elianna.
I laughed. I could not help myself. I might say the same of you, Centurion.
Good day, Calvus, Ethan said from the door. I tensed, wondering how he would react to the Romans visit. To my relief, Ethan sprawled on the couch, his movements relaxed and measured. I sensed the tension in his bunched muscles and watchful eyes, but that was only because I knew him so well.
Did you have success with your merchant? I said.
A small one. Its not a large order, but a good start.
So you are marrying Elianna after all these years, Calvus interjected. You must allow me to celebrate your good fortune. There is a tavern in Tiberias that serves the best wine outside of Herods palace, and their food tastes palatable, though it is Jewish. They have a private room. Very respectable, and visited by many of your own people. I wish to treat you both to a night out. To show there are no hard feelings. After all, we were friends, once.
Ethan sat up stiffly. That is generous, Calvus. Unfortunately, we have too much to do before we depart.
What? Pack this hovel? It wont take but an hour. Come now. If you wish, I will not accompany you. Just pay for your bill. You can take Eliannas sister and that maid of hers along, if you wish. The innkeeper knows me. I will leave him word to expect you.
We will be happy to accept, I said before Ethan could refuse again. I saw no sense in provoking Calvus. He never liked being thwarted, even in such a small matter.
Calvus relaxed at my answer. Giving us directions to the tavern, he took his leave with abrupt haste.
That is a strange man, I said with a sigh.
Ethan let out a slow breath. I dont trust him, Elianna.
Neither do I. But I see no reason to give him offense over such a trifling matter. We can go for a short time. What could be the harm?
In the end, we went to the tavern as a family, with Rachel, Chuza, and Joanna as well as Keziah in tow. We found that Calvus had not lied when he described the private dining room as respectable, the wine excellent, and the food tolerable.
I had just tasted my first spoonful of the delicious stew when I remembered that I had intended to give Chuza Gamaliels Scriptures as a parting gift. I would not see my brother-in-law again before our departure, since Herodias was sending him on some frivolous a.s.signment for the whole week.
Of course, he and Joanna would travel to Jerusalem as soon as they could, but I wanted to give him the parchment as a remembrance of the years we had studied and prayed together. Those hard years when our dreams had seemed so impossible. I knew how he would cherish that roll of parchment. Foolishly, I had left it behind at home.
I must go home, I whispered to Ethan. I forgot Chuzas gift.
I will come with you.
We made our excuses and raced back to the house, intending to return before the meal grew cold. A strange sight met us at the door. A bright light, like that of a torch, shone through the window. It should have been dark inside.
Remain here, Ethan ordered before dragging the door open. I could see into the front room with perfect clarity. Decimus Calvus stood before the old box of papers I had discovered that afternoon, a blazing torch in hand, clearly intent on setting everything inside it on fire.
I walked in behind Ethan. What are you doing, Calvus?
You bothersome woman! Calvus shouted. Why cant you just once do what you are supposed to do?
Before Ethan could prevent me, I drew closer. Why do you care about those old papers? With sudden clarity, understanding dawned. Its the account books. You want to destroy those old account books.
Calvus remained silent. Sweat glistened on his forehead. The torch dipped toward the wooden box. A handsbreadth away, it stopped.
I frowned. You want to burn those old accounts? Go ahead. Do you think I care after all these years? What did you do? Neglect to pay my father for your purchases? Once, that would have mattered. But it is of little importance to me now.
Calvus glared. You cant mean it, he said, as if the words were ripped out of him.
Calvus, I forgive your debt. Its of no account.
What if I said it was a great deal of money?
I shrugged. It matters not how much. I forgive your debt. Take the account books if it makes your heart easy.
Ethan pressed me behind him. Wait a moment. This liking for fire is not a new hobby, is it, Decimus Calvus?
What do you mean? I said.
The night your fathers chamber burned. We never found the source of the fire, remember? Didnt you tell me that you had a quarrel with Calvus over the accounts that day? Even then he was desperate to destroy them. It was you, wasnt it, Roman? You set fire to that chamber.
The centurion shrugged. Was it you? I said, shaken, thinking of the devastating loss of that night. You ruined all our stock. I almost died!
I never meant harm to you, he said gruffly.
And the horse, Ethan said as if Calvus had not spoken. You pressed it on Eliannas father the night of Avrams feast. I always a.s.sumed that someone had tried to kill you by injuring the horse. But it was you the whole time. You tampered with the saddle yourself because you wanted Benjamin out of the way. You had no way of paying your debts. So you decided to kill him in order to save your skin.
Is it true? Even as I asked the question, I knew Ethan had arrived at the right conclusion. My voice had become a croaking whisper. You harmed my father for the sake of money? I thought of my fathers suffering, of those months when he lay caught between life and death, shattered. For a moment, a spark of hatred for this man threatened to consume me.
Love your enemies.
I heard the words as clearly as if Jesus himself had spoken them again. The hate dissolved, leaving only sadness in its wake.
These crazed accusations are nothing but the workings of your wild imaginings, Calvus said through frozen lips. Can you prove a single word before a legal tribunal? If not, you had better shut your mouth, Jew, or you will grow intimately familiar with the inside of a Roman jail.
Ethan took a step forward. I can show those accounts. I may not be able to prove the fire or your murderous plot. But I can demand my money. The workshop belongs to me now. What you owed Benjamin, you now owe me.
Calvus lifted the torch like a weapon. Ethan bent at the knee, ready to rush him, intending to take the torch away from him. With a calm I did not know I possessed, I grabbed a burning lamp from the table near me.
Stop this at once, I said. My voice sounded cool in my own ears. They turned toward me, both of them frozen midstep. Ethans mouth clenched and turned white. I gave him a small smile and looked deep into his eyes. Without hesitation, I put the flame of my lamp against the papers in the wooden box and watched them catch fire. The flames licked up the dry contents with ferocious speed.
The two men grew paralyzed in the center of the room. Calvus lowered the arm that held the torch, staring at me with stupefaction.
What are you doing? Ethan cried. Have you lost your mind?
I said I forgave him for his debts, and I meant it, Ethan. I turned to Calvus. Remember the prophet I told you about? The one who healed me? He said that we were to love our enemies. To do good to those who hate us. Thats what I am doing, Calvus. For his sake. For mine. For Ethans. I choose to forgive you.
I dont understand. How can you?
I have made many poor choices in my life. I have hurt the people most precious to me. My father could not offer me his forgiveness. Nor could I overcome my own burden of guilt. Then this prophet"they call him Jesus"healed me. His touch made me whole again. Body and soul. Do you understand, Decimus? My guilt is gone, replaced by grace.
I think that if I have received such an undeniable mercy, who am I to withhold it from you? Take the gift. It is from our Lord more than from me. Do not squander it, Decimus.
Calvus swallowed convulsively. I could not tell if it was the acrid smoke rising out of the wooden box or my words that caused his eyes to fill with tears. He opened his mouth to speak. No words came out. He ran past me, past Ethan, outside the door and into the night.
You better put out those flames, I said to Ethan.
He gaped at me for a moment before rushing to the box. Everything inside was a ruinous mess by the time he quenched the fire.
It occurred to me that I had burned his doc.u.ments, his account books. As he had said, Calvuss debt belonged to him now. Cringing, I said, Are you angry?
Why would I be angry?
I ruined your chances of revenging yourself on Calvus and getting your money back.
He walked to me and drew me into his arms, cradling me against him with such careful tenderness you would have thought I was made of Persian gla.s.s.
You are beautiful, my love. You are beautiful. Never again will I care about Decimus Calvus and the harm he has done to us. You have set me free of him.
EPILOGUE.
He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.
PROVERBS 18:22.
AFTER YEARS OF DISAPPOINTMENT, loss, and suffering, the Lord gathered his many blessings and poured them upon me in such a deluge that I sometimes caught myself wondering if I was dreaming. Ethan and I were married in peace. Jerusha and Ezer shed tears of joy, knowing now the full extent of what had taken place over a decade ago. They welcomed me as if I were their long-lost daughter. I suppose I was. Joanna and Chuza were present at my wedding, as were Claudia and t.i.tus. Viriato actually cried, which set me to weeping. In the end, I do not believe there was a dry eye in the whole feast.
Every bride should go through a trial of fire before her wedding. Though I would not wish my own misfortunes upon another, many good fruits came from them, and these I cannot regret. One result of my years of loneliness was how I cherished Ethan. He could say little to disappoint or rile me. I was so happy to share my life with him that nothing he did caused me to love him less. I never took a moment of our time for granted. Being with Ethan always seemed to carry with it a touch of the miraculous. My marriage overflowed with happiness not because Ethan and I never had problems, but because we never allowed them to come between us.
He did complain that my favorite word was still no. This charge was entirely unjustified. I did not once say no when he tried to kiss me or hold me in his arms.
Although Jesus had healed me of my disease, I did not know whether having suffered so many years of sickness would affect my wombs ability to bear children. But the Lord made my cup overflow with joy when after only four months of marriage to Ethan, I could tell Rachel that she was about to have a little sister or brother.
Sarah was also ancient when she had Isaac, and that turned out well, Rachel said.
To my relief, we got along beautifully. I suppose she could sense that I loved her dearly, and that was enough for her, even though I was very old! Her mother had died when Rachel was so young that she had little memory of her. Though she still thought of Sarai with loyal fondness, she had no problem turning some of her affections toward me. Of course, Ethan was the star of her sky. Feeling the same, I could not fault her.
A few months later, Jesus arrived in Jerusalem. Viriato came with us to hear him, once. He had been impressed by our tales of him and wanted to see the man with his own eyes. When he found out that Jesus broke many religious rules, including healing on the Sabbath, Viriato declared that if following the Lord meant becoming like Jesus, then he would follow the Lord. To my knowledge, he never did give up pork.
Joanna had her baby a few months before me, a beautiful boy with thick dark hair and plump fingers. She named him Joseph. To my delight, she took to traveling with Jesus whenever she could, especially when Chuza was busy at work, clasping Joseph to her chest and taking him along. She said the presence of Jesus was the safest place for a child and never worried for Josephs well-being on those journeys. I cherished her letters as she described her adventures and told me of the many lives touched by the love of our Messiah.
My daughter, Atarah, arrived two weeks later than expected. I could not begrudge the delay; I had waited so long for this impossible dream, two extra weeks hardly seemed worth quibbling over. She stole our hearts from the moment she opened her eyes and surveyed us with her sleepy gaze. Rachel admitted that even a much younger woman could not have produced a more perfect babe.
I daresay that my own story was amongst those spread throughout Judea and beyond. Perhaps one day people I have never met will hear of me and know that Jesus of Nazareth ended the endless misery of a hopeless woman with one stolen touch and a few life-transforming words.