She was sitting up in bed, still weak, but now she felt in control again. She hated being sniveling and helpless.
aYou still look pale as death,a Maggie said as she gently braided her hair. aBut since you looked like death itself just this morning, what you look like now is an improvement.a aThank you, Maggie.a aYou must eat some more of the barley soup Mr. Badger made for you. It should taste quite delicious to someone who nearly stuck her spoon in the wall but didnat, and thus should be grateful to be able to eat anything at all. I took a sip but it didnat suit me. Iam well, you see, not sickly like you, d.u.c.h.ess. I donat feel like Iam going to puke up my innards, not like you do.a aI donat think Iall be sick now, Maggie. The nausea is gone.a aWell, thatas a blessing. I donat fancy cleaning up that kind of sickness, mind you.a Marcus overheard the last of this and was hard-pressed not to smile. He lost the desire when he saw her face. She looked utterly defenseless. The aloof reserve was gone and in its place was a d.a.m.ned vulnerable look that made him flinch. Head never seen her this way before and he realized that it scared him witless. He realized with a start that he would prefer her yelling at him, calling him a b.a.s.t.a.r.d and a sod, even sticking that chin of hers in the air again, anything but staring silently at him as if he werenat worth the words to say to curse him with, as if, somehow, she were afraid of him. No, she couldnat be afraid of him. Soon, shead be as she had been and he knew it would take some getting used to, that pa.s.sion of hers, that very loud violent anger of hers, but he wanted to see it again, he wanted to see her face turn red, watch her change from the aloof, bloodless creature into a woman as pa.s.sionate out of bed as in it. Shead gotten in a quite good blow with that d.a.m.ned bridle.
And someone had struck her down. Someone in this household. And that someone had to be one of the d.a.m.ned Colonists. Aunt Wilhelmina was his prime candidate, the miserable old besom.
ah.e.l.lo,a he said, walking to her bed. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. He searched her eyes, saw that they were clear and that pleased him. aYou will appreciate that Badger and Spears together took Mr. Tivit beneath his arms and bodily a.s.sisted him from this room.a aI vaguely remember a fat little man with a red face and a loud voice. His black coat was dirty, wasnat it?a aYes, filthy. Iam glad you didnat see his hands. Thatas Mr. Tivit, and heas the local doctor, and a miserable one at that. Anyway, when he pulled out his bleeding instruments and brought over a basin to the bed, Badger told him to take his torture devices out of here and never show his face again. He appealed to me and I told him you were so weak now that if he took any blood from you, you would turn into a beautiful leaf and float away. He huffed, lamenting his wounded dignity all the way to the stables.a He lifted her hand, enclosing it in his large one. He felt warm, solid. aHe is an old fool. I wouldnat have let him near you but Trevor sent for him, not realizing that he was an ancient relic and even as a young man he was a half-wit.a aHas anyone said anything about what happened?a aDo you mean has Aunt Wilhelmina broken into tears and confessed all? Iam sorry, d.u.c.h.ess, no such luck. It turns out that James was downstairs on his way out the door to the stables. He had it in his mind that he would visit the ruins just at dawn, and search for the treasure. A romantic notion but one that would have probably just given him an inflammation of the lungs, given our damp mornings.
aPerhaps James struck you down and took the book and then raised the alarm. Perhaps he was afraid head killed you or that you would die without help. I donat know, d.u.c.h.ess.a He paused a moment, then looked directly into her eyes. aWhy did you leave your bedchamber?a aI didnat want to stay. I was afraid you would come.a aI see,a he said, his hackles rising, but he managed to keep both his voice and his expression calm. Head been stupid to ask her that question given her current condition. No, he would ask it again when she was once more fit and he could yell at her and then toss up her skirts and drive her wild with pleasure. Just maybe shead yell back at him and . . .
aWhy are you smiling, Marcus?a aHuh? Oh, I was just thinking about the obnoxious barley concoction Badger is right now mixing up for you. Esmee, my cat, even removed herself at the smell. That or it was Badgeras singing whilst he stirred the mess that made her run yowling from the kitchen.a He was lying but he was good at it, and she didnat really mind. Shead lied to him herself once or twice in the past five minutes.
aNow, tell me about the book and those final pages.a She did, describing in detail that gnarled ancient oak tree and those stones that were piled up, not just in piles but constructed with a purpose in mind. And the well, with that leather-bound old wooden bucket, surely it was very, very old. And there were men and women there and they looked Medieval, if she remembered correctly.
He looked abstracted. He rose.
aWhere are you going?a He grinned down at her. aSo, my company is preferable to no one elseas, eh? No, donat worry, d.u.c.h.ess. Aunt Gweneth will be here shortly. Sheas very worried about you. Sheall not leave you until I return.a Not five minutes after Aunt Gweneth arrived, all gentle worry and soothing fingers to smooth away her headache, Aunt Wilhelmina came into the bedchamber, swathed in dark purple, her impressive bosom well in the foreground like the figurehead on a ship.
aOh dear,a Gweneth said, aI donat believe dear Marcus wants more than just one visitor at a time, Willie. The d.u.c.h.ess is still quite weak.a The d.u.c.h.ess opened her eyes and stared into a face that had once been quite pretty but was now filled with discontent, and bright, dark eyes that were filled with a savage sort of delight at seeing her lying here on her back. Willie? Surely that wasnat quite the right name for her aunt. Surely a Willie was warm and giggly and kindness itself. It was just as odd a name on her as Trevor was on her eldest son.
aSo, someone struck you down. What a pity.a aYes, as you see. To get the book, the same book that Mr. Burgess has.a aYouare lying. No one would strike you to get to that silly book.a aReally, Willie, the d.u.c.h.ess is ill. I beg you to leave now. She must rest.a aI wish she would die and good riddance to the wh.o.r.e.a Aunt Gweneth gasped. aWhat? What did you say, Willie?a aI said I could cry and that I pray thereall be no more.a The d.u.c.h.ess closed her eyes and turned her head away from Wilhelmina.
It required but the Twins and Ursula, and they poked their heads into the bedchamber not two moments later.
aMother, the d.u.c.h.ess must rest,a Ursula said in a firm adultas voice. aCome along now. f.a.n.n.y and Antonia want you to see the new bird feeder weave made. Mr. Oslo, the estate carpenter, helped us, but we did most of the work and we even painted it. It has the look of our house in Baltimore.a aOh, very well. Do rest, d.u.c.h.ess, maybe forever.a aWillie!a aWhat is wrong with you, Gweneth? I just told her to rest and get better.a aMama, please come along now.a When they were alone again, Aunt Gweneth said softly, aDo forgive her, d.u.c.h.ess. She isnat always a diplomatic woman and her life hasnat been all that easy.a aYou mean she was starving in a gutter drinking blue ruin when your brother married her? Or perhaps she was an orphan in a workhouse? I know, it was smallpox, wasnat it? Or do you mean that your brothera"my unclea"beat her?a aWell, no, not exactly. However, youave covered just about every possibility.a Gweneth paused a moment, a brow raised thoughtfully. aThat was well put, very well put indeed. You seem a bit different, d.u.c.h.ess. Ah, itas just that, wella"Wilhelmina isnat a very happy person.a aSheas a vicious harpy,a the d.u.c.h.ess said, then sighed deeply. aI want to rest now, Aunt Gweneth, thatas certain, but not forever.a aNo, dear, certainly not. Whatever medicine Badger gave you, keep taking it. I like the vinegar in you, dear. Itas such a change, but so invigorating, donat you think?a
20.
WHEN SHE AWOKE, it was late afternoon. Badger was sitting beside her. He immediately smiled down at her and gave her some water, holding her head gently in the crook of his arm.
aYou always know what to do. Thank you.a He merely nodded. aI heard about the invasion of that American person from Miss Antonia. Now, this person, who is only your aunt by marriage, will not be allowed to discomfit you again. Mr. Spears and I have worked out a schedule. Whenever his lordship isnat here, either Mr. Spears or Miss Maggie or I will be. You wonat be bothered again, d.u.c.h.ess.a aAnd when they arenat here, why I will be. How do you feel, d.u.c.h.ess?a She felt her spirits lift just at the sound of his voice. It was stupid of her, but true nonetheless. aIam fine now, Marcus. If you wish, you can relieve your spleen. You can yell at me again with good conscience.a He frowned at her. aNo, I shanat do that, particularly in front of Badger. Now, I will dine with you this evening, right here, then we will see tomorrow morning if youare ready to get out of bed.a He continued to Badger, aI understand you forced my poor Esmee to eat some of the barley mixture you made for the d.u.c.h.ess and she died. Is that true?a She laughed, a weak laugh, but still a laugh.
aThat d.a.m.ned selfish cat wouldnat offer herself up to try my barley soup,a Badger said. aMiserable beast, that Esmee. I thought Iad caught her, but she twitched her tail right out from between my fingers. Mr. Spears said she sleeps with you, when youare in your own bed, that is.a aItas been known to happen. Esmee is fickle, just as is the d.u.c.h.ess.a aEsmee slept with me last night,a she said. aRight in the bend behind my knees.a aShe prefers my chest when she deigns to visit me,a Marcus said. aShe likes to knead the hair, d.a.m.ned creature. As for her volunteering for that barley mixture, she wouldnat ever offer herself up.a He slept with her that night, stretching out naked beside her, completely at his ease, as if head slept there for the past twenty years. Esmee had come briefly into the bedchamber, stared silently at them, then, twitching her tail, she went through the open adjoining door into Marcusas bedchamber.
He reached out and took her hand in his. She could feel the heat from his body. She felt safer than she ever had in her life.
aAll this excitement left me with a gray hair, d.u.c.h.ess. I ask you to keep to your bed after this and not go searching out clues in the middle of the night.a aI donat believe you, Marcus. Let me see this gray hair.a aNo, I shanat light a candle and have you poking about my scalp. You can find it in the morning.a aDid you discover anything?a aNo. Everyone claims to have been soundly in the arms of Morpheus. Also, I might add, the Wyndhams have excelled at the art of falsehood for centuries. None of us ever flinch or even blink an eyelid when spilling out a lie. Even you, d.u.c.h.ess.a Her fingers tightened over his. aYou must be exaggerating, Marcus.a aNary a bit. Now, I find this a mite interesting. Here we are side by side in bed like a good married couple should be, and I will admit that Iam harder than the bricks on the fireplace, but I wonat attack you, not even when I know you like it so much.a Before she would have been silent as a tombstone. But now she giggled and bent back his thumb until he yelped.
aYou become physical again. But my thumb, d.u.c.h.ess? Would you like me to give you pleasure?a aNo. Be quiet, Marcus. My head hurts.a He laughed. aAh, the excuse of wives for centuries, or so my father told me. However, in your case, it just might be the truth. As I recall, my mother hit his arm when he said it. Good night, my dear.a aDid you go to the abbey ruins?a aYes. Trevor and James were there poking around, the d.a.m.ned sods. Even Ursula arrived shortly to do her own poking. It was a merry family, all wanting to find anything at all and keep it from the others. I donat like any of this, d.u.c.h.ess.a aExcept for Ursula. She would run to you with anything she found. She idolizes you, both she and f.a.n.n.y. Youall grow abominably conceited with all this guileless female attention.a aNo, I wonat accept that. Believe me, f.a.n.n.yas infatuation is quite enough. One young girl fluttering her eyelashes at my poor self is unnerving enough. And here my wife is lying in her bed unable to protect me. And now you would protect me, wouldnat you? Or would you perceive that I was a bounder despite my innocence, and come after me with another weapon?a aI would try to be fair. Now, you can rest easy. Ursula is very fond of me, so she wouldnat dream of trying to take you away from me.a aA relief. A right b.l.o.o.d.y relief.a The relief lasted for a full day and a half. She rested and mended and the lump behind her left ear disappeared. Maggie even washed her hair, removing all the oily salve Badger had made for the lump and Spears had remorselessly rubbed in three times that first day. On the second night, Marcus came into her bedchamber wearing only his dressing gown and she knew he was naked beneath it, but then again, why shouldnat he be?
She remembered how shead left her bedchamber because shead not wanted to face him. Well, she wouldnat ever leave again. Let him do his worst. She grinned at that. Just let him try to treat her like a vessel again, a vessel that he scorned.
ah.e.l.lo, Marcus,a she called out to him. aI am quite well tonight. Do you intend to exercise your marital rights? Will you heave over me? When youave had enough of me will you leave again and spill yourself on my belly?a She saw him clearly in her mindas eye, lifting himself over her, saw the intense determination on his face, saw him spilling his seed on her belly, not inside her, no, never there because he hated his uncle so much for his betrayal.
He paused, staring at her. Shead startled him yet again. He shook his head. He doubted he would ever get used to this new side of her.
She changed then before his eyes, now she was serious, dead serious, saying as he came to stand beside her bed, aYou must have an heir, Marcus. Your pride mustnat get in the way of providing a male child for the next generation of Wyndhams. Why donat you just forget my father and what he did. It isnat important. It doesnat touch us.a aOh yes, it does and it always will.a Then he smiled at her. She wouldnat control him, no matter how her mind shifted and played and danced around him. He said easily, aOnce you and your d.a.m.ned cohorts forced me to wed with you, you removed many of my options, d.u.c.h.ess. But not all. Letas get that nightgown off you. Iam tired of waiting.a In that moment, something deep inside her uncoiled and began to fill her. She felt herself growing cold and colder still, all of it inside her, deep inside.
aVery well,a she said, and all that coldness she felt was in her voice, in her eyes as she stared up at him.
She said nothing more to him. Besides, he didnat want to talk, he wanted his pleasure and hers as well because shead come to realize that it gratified his male vanity to make her cry out despite herself. He was gentle and insistent at first, then his mouth was on her mouth, then on her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and her belly, until finally he was caressing her, pushing her to pleasure. But there wasnat any. She lay there, and this time she did suffer him. She hadnat realized how very empty this lovemaking could be when she was not part of it, not part of him. But there he was, isolated from her, and she saw his growing pa.s.sion mix with his frustration because he couldnat arouse her, and she didnat care. She just lay there, her arms beside her flat on the bed. She didnat even feel anger, just a numbness, just a waiting for him to finish.
He stopped finally, coming up to look down at her. Head left the candlelight so he could see her face and her body, for both pleased him, he had told her several times before, then he would speak softly to her, going into vast detail and laughing softly when she would flush at the shocking words, words surely too intimate, and then he would carry his words into action.
This time he said nothing. And now he was looking down at her, studying her face, looking at her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and her belly. His face was flushed, his breath coming deep and heavy. He was swelled and ready for her. He started to speak, then shook his head at himself. Suddenly, he pulled her open to him and, lifting her in his big hands, went into her deep and hard.
She gasped at the feel of him but he didnat hurt her for head softened her, she couldnat deny that, but still she felt him deep inside her with none of the pleasure, just his differentness, the hardness of him, and his heaving over her, and she hated it, this separateness from him. She simply waited, not moving.
Then, just as suddenly as the first time, he pulled out of her and pressed himself against her belly.
And when he was done, he went back onto his heels between her legs.
She said, cold as the North Sea during winter solstice, aAre you now through with me? Ah, certainly you are. May I have a handkerchief, Marcus? I dislike your seed sprayed on me. No, donat worry, there are no weapons for me about to take to you though you deserve to be beaten quite thoroughly. No, just give me a handkerchief and take yourself off.a Shead begun sounding as unemotional as a stick and he wanted to yell at her. But now she was mocking him, laughing at him, and he didnat know what he wanted to do. Shead been utterly still beneath him. Head wanted desperately to bring her to him but she hadnat responded. He hated it. He looked down at his seed on her belly. So she hated his seed on her, did she? He looked to her face. She looked utterly composed, no, more than that, she looked b.l.o.o.d.y amused now, but it was cold, that amus.e.m.e.nt of hers. She looked as if she didnat give a good d.a.m.n. She looked indifferent. She could castrate him with her indifference. He hated her at that moment, hated her for being as pa.s.sionate as he was before, hated her for making him as wild as a young boy, all the while lying there, thinking about nothing in particular, perhaps even wondering about characters in the novel shead been reading that afternoon, or perhaps about Esmee, but not thinking of him, just lying there, enduring him, waiting for him to finish with her. He rocked back on his heels with rage, striking his fist on his thigh.
aI donat believe this. Iad rather have you shrieking at me like you did in the tack room. You lost complete control. Youave good strong lungs. The good Lord knows I never wanted you for a wife and believe me, d.u.c.h.ess, I will use you only until I return to London. Then you wonat have to suffer me further.a He was off her bed in moments, jerked up his dressing gown and was gone from her room, slamming the adjoining door behind him.
She rose and washed him off herself. She slowly pulled her nightgown over her head and smoothed it down. She tied the ribbons at her shoulders. When she was back in her bed, she moved to the far edge, for she fancied she could still feel the heat of him. And she was cold, for the deep rage was banked. Perhaps she should fetch one of her fatheras dueling pistols from the estate room. Perhaps she should simply be prepared. She could never outguess Marcus. Yes, she would be wise to be prepared.
The d.u.c.h.ess climbed over the low fence, careful not to rip her riding skirt. She looked about her, studying the details of the landscape. The Fenlow moor was off to the west, rugged and barren even in the lush warmth of summer. To the east was a dense copse of trees, firs and beeches, mostly. But directly in front of her were farms, spread out like richly embroidered squares, rich with growing crops under the summer sun, one after another, their boundaries stone fences or lines of carefully planted trees. There were small hillocks dotting here and there and trees and several small streams. It was a beautiful prospect, but she didnat care. It was a puzzle. These were just pieces and she didnat yet know which pieces fit where.
She just wanted to find that ancient gnarled oak tree, and thus shead walked from a different direction today. She stopped and studied the stone fences slashing gray and thick across the horizon, most of them well maintained by the farmers, but some falling into disrepair.
She shook out her skirts and walked forward. Where the devil was that oak tree?
She reached the ruins of St. Swaleas Abbey after a brisk twenty-minute walk. Shead been here every day now for a week and a half, looking through the rubble, searching, for what, she had no idea.
As to who had struck her down and taken the book, she didnat know that either. Nor did Marcus. Nor did Spears or Badger or Maggie, who refused to let her out of their collective sight. Even Mr. Crittaker and Sampson had joined their ranks. She was never alone in the house, never. Now her guard believed her to be resting as they believed her to have been resting for the past week and a half at this particular time. And that was why she was on foot. The stable lads were loyal to Marcus. Lambkin would have a fit if he saw her near the stables. If she took Birdie out, Marcus would know it within ten minutes.
She was on her knees in what she was certain had been a monkas cell, studying a small etched drawing low on one of the stones in the wall when suddenly from behind her, he said, furious, aWhat the devil are you doing here? d.a.m.n you, d.u.c.h.ess, youare supposed to be resting.a She turned slowly, unaware that there was a smudge of dirt on her cheek and that her hair was coming down, a thick plait curling over her shoulder. aMarcus,a she said only.
aWhat are you doing here?a aLooking around.a She shrugged. aCome look at this etching. Itas very faint, but I can still make out the lines. This is a monkas cell, Iam sure of that. Come on your knees and look.a He didnat. He grabbed her arm and hauled her upright. aYou have b.l.o.o.d.y lied to everyone, havenat you?a He shook her. aYou havenat been the feminine little lady reclining on her bed napping, have you? No, youave been here, digging about and wandering around alone, d.a.m.n you.a He shook her again for good measure. aSay something, anything. Shriek at me or yell. Yowl like Esmee when sheas in a snit.a Suddenly, she turned perfectly white. aMarcus,a she said, utterly disbelieving, alet me go. Iam going to be ill.a He was so surprised, he released her immediately. He watched as she fell to her knees and wretched. Soon she was dry heaving, for she hadnat eaten much. He knelt beside her, pulling back her hair, steadying her, for she was trembling now from the effort, weak from vomiting. He felt a shaft of guilt, sharp as an arrow. aI told you that you should be resting. Look what comes of it. d.a.m.nation, youare still ill from that blow. No wonder you didnat yell at me, or flail at me with your shrewas tongue, you were too busy swallowing your bile, and you failed.a He took out his handkerchief and handed it to her. She wiped her mouth, then crumpled it in her hand when her body shook with more heaves that left her sweating and shaky.
He cursed even as he lifted her into his arms. He was silent as a midnight moon as he managed to mount Stanley with her in his arms. He settled her in the crook of his arm, then kicked Stanley in his fat sides. To her surprise, he didnat ride back to the Park. Instead, after some minutes, he halted his stallion beside a slender thread of a stream bordered with thick water reeds.
He lifted her down and eased her onto her knees. He cupped the water in his hands and let her wash out her mouth. She then swallowed some of the water, clear and so cold that it made her lips blue. The water hit her belly and nausea struck her again. She moaned, clutching her arms around herself.
He ripped off the hem of her petticoat, wet it, and wiped her face. He carried her to the shade of a maple tree, eased down and pulled her back against him, settling her between his legs. aHold still. Is your belly settling now?a aI donat know.a aYou feel weak and shaky. Itas understandable. Just lie against me and keep quiet for a while. Iam tired of your d.a.m.ned protestations.a She didnat remember protesting anything. She closed her eyes.
He felt her ease, heard her breathing slow and deepen. He stared over the top of her head to the stream then beyond it, realized he wasnat seeing anything at all, and tightened his hold around her, leaning his head back against the trunk of the tree. It was warm. Bees buzzed about. He could hear larks singing.
He heard a cow mooing in the distance. Stanley was eating water reeds not many feet away, chewing noisily. He closed his eyes. When he awoke, the sun had moved a goodly distance toward the west. He must have twitched upon awakening, for she was now awake too.
aDonat move. First tell me how you feel.a aIam fine now, truly. Thank you for helping me, Marcus.a aI saw you leaving the house and I followed you. Why the devil didnat you at least ride Birdie?a aThe stable lads would have told you immediately. Lambkin would probably have refused to saddle her.a aYou have done this before today?a aYes, for over a week now. I want to find that oak tree with the well beneath it. It should be near the abbey, but I couldnat find it. But it must be around here, Marcus, someplace close. Iave been so frustrated.a Very slowly, he lifted her onto his thighs and turned her to face him. aListen to me. Hasnat it occurred to you that the person who struck you down in the library just might be interested in striking you down again?a aWhy? The person saw that book and I was in the way. I was struck only because of the book, Marcus.a aYou canat possibly know that. Now, weare going back to the Park. No, donat try to move yourself. Iall carry you.a As he walked to Stanley, who was chewing vigorously, and ignored them, he said, aAre you still having headaches as well as belly nausea?a aNo, and I havenat felt ill before today, I promise you. It is odd.a aYou will climb into your bed when we get home. No, donat stiffen up like a frightened virgin or draw in your breath to scream at me for my interference like a Milanese soprano. I have no intention of climbing into your bed beside you. I will come to you tonight though, so donat go haring off to another bedchamber. If you do, Iall search you out and I wonat be pleased with you. Another thing, there will be no more lying there, wishing me dead or impotent, which would be worse.a aWhy donat you just go back to London? To Celeste? Or you could have Lisette come to you here.a aYes, I could, couldnat I?a aYou could try it,a she said, chin up, eyes lighting for battle, for the nausea was gone now, thank G.o.d. aI wonder if you would be so stupid.a His eyes glinted and he was slavering to goad her but good, saying in a drawl that could match Trevoras, it was so slow and taunting in its slowness, aDo I take it that you are threatening me, woman? Are you saying that you would gullet me if I touch another woman?a aRight now I am saying that you would be very sorry if you brought one of your women here. If you touched another womana"I will think about that and let you know. I believe a man should understand his options.a She said not another word, but she was smiling, curse those mysterious eyes of hers. He insisted on carrying her through the entrance hall for all to see, then upstairs to her bedchamber, where he made a grand production of seeing to her care.
21.
aI WISH YOU WOULD lose all your hair.a aHuh? What did you say?a His hold around her tightened.
aI said,a the d.u.c.h.ess said sweetly, smiling at him, athat I wished you would call for a chair. Surely youare uncomfortable just standing there like that.a He grinned down at her. aThat wasnat bad, but youare no compet.i.tion for Aunt Wilhelmina. Perhaps you simply havenat any talent for well-turned rhymes.a aEnough talent so I didnat starve!a She stared at him, clamping her hand over her mouth. She was a fool. It was the first time in her life head goaded her into unwise speech. In the past two weeks, head not goaded her in anything. Shead said just what shead wanted, but now. She wanted to bite her tongue off.
But he didnat understand, at least he didnat realize what shead just let slip. aSo, weare back to the mythical man who supported you at Pipwell Cottage again.a aNo, weare not. But just perhaps I was lying, as all Wyndhams lie, so youave told me. So perhaps there was a man. What do you think, Marcus?a If head been a dog, he would have growled, but he got a hold on himself immediately, saying in that easy way of his that made her want to strike him and kiss him at the same time, aWell, I know he wasnat your protector. If you convinced some fool to give you money with no return with your favors, who am I to cavil? No, come on now, d.u.c.h.ess, I wasnat really serious.a He gave her an unrepentant grin. aShall I undress you? Where are your nightgowns?a aIall see to her, my lord,a Maggie said, coming into the room like a queen ready to fire off her troops. aYou just leave the d.u.c.h.ess be. Look how flushed she is. Youave been scolding her, havenat you, or teasing her? That canat be good for her, though, I, like everyone else, saw you bringing her in. We all believed you to be resting, d.u.c.h.ess. It wasnat well done of you to go off by yourself. That monster who struck you down just might have done it again.a aFrom the mouths of maids,a Marcus murmured.
The d.u.c.h.ess closed her eyes. She wondered if she should tell Maggie that she was flushed with utter delightful anger. But she didnat. To her surprise, she felt fatigue wash over her. She was asleep within moments.
Marcus was true to his word. That evening after solicitously seeing her to her bedchamber and handing her over to Maggie, he took himself to his own bedchamber. He opened the adjoining door a half an hour later.
She was sitting in an overly plump chair in front of the small fireplace, staring into the sluggishly burning flames.
ah.e.l.lo,a he said. aHere I am just as I promised.a She spared him a glance. aGo away, Marcus.a aOh no. I only just wrote to Celeste this afternoon. She wonat be arriving for another four days. I will have to make do with you until then.a aYouave been warned,a she said, nothing more, just that. Then she folded her hands in her lap and ignored him, an enraging, indifferent, aloof act that the old d.u.c.h.ess would have performed.
He gave a martyras sigh, leaned down, and scooped her up in his arms. He kissed her as she turned her head and touched her neck. aYou smell wonderful, but then you always do.a aThank you. Go away, Marcus. I will not be your vessel of the moment. I wonat suffer the boredom of you in my bed. Go dream of Celeste.a a aVessel of the moment.a That sounds mighty odd, d.u.c.h.ess.a He set her on her feet beside her bed, then, without fuss or more words, stripped off her dressing gown and nightgown. He set her away from him. aThe good Lord constructed you quite nicely,a he said, stroking his fingertips over his chin as he looked her up and down. aHe had me in mind, obviously, for the size of you, and the shape of you, is just to my liking.a She looked indifferent, merely standing there, looking away from him, not moving. She sucked in her breath when he reached out his hand and lightly caressed her left breast. aYes, youare made of beautiful shapes. This is very intriguing, d.u.c.h.ess. You are silent as the d.u.c.h.ess of yore, then youare not. I never know what to expect from you now.a aYou never will know, Marcus, you d.a.m.ned sod.a He laughed even as his hand stroked over her ribs and her belly. She took a step back, then gave a sharp cry. She looked at him, her eyes wide and bewildered. Then she turned and ran from him.
ad.u.c.h.ess.a He took a step after her, then frowned himself in consternation when she dropped to her knees and retched into the chamber pot. He went down on his knees beside her, holding her steady. aThis is familiar,a he said, pulling her hair back from her face. aI donat like it. You were ill this afternoon and now youare ill again. There is a physician in Darlington who has a fine reputation. I believe I will have him come here to the Park now, tonight in fact.a She was shuddering, huddling in on herself. He rose and fetched her dressing gown, wrapping it around her. He put her in bed, then said, aYou lie still. I mean it, d.u.c.h.ess. Just lie still until I return.a He did return and in only five minutes. With him were Spears, Badger, and Maggie, wearing a gown of teal-blue satin with a dcolletage that would send a vicar into shock. Marcus was saying as he entered the bedchamber, aShe vomited this afternoon and again now. I know of this physician in Darlington. I want you, Badger, to go fetch him.a Badger cleared his throat and stared at his pale huddled mistress in the large bed.
Spears closely studied the small cl.u.s.ters of grapes carved into the edges of the mantel.
Maggie smoothed the luscious teal-blue satin over her hips.
Marcus frowned. aWhat the devil is going on here? Badger?a Spears said to the d.u.c.h.ess, aMaggie will fetch you a biscuit to nibble on. It will help settle your stomach.a aHow the h.e.l.l do you know that?a aNow, my lord,a Spears said in an odious avuncular voice, athere is naught to worry about. We have all discussed the situation and there is nothing to concern us and therefore nothing to concern you. Her ladyship is performing a natural function.a aWhat b.l.o.o.d.y natural function? Do you so conveniently forget that she was struck down not two weeks ago?a Badger said, aThe d.u.c.h.ess is breeding, my lord. She is carrying the heir. The nausea and vomiting are natural. It will pa.s.s within a short time. Mr. Spears says another three weeks and sheall be perfectly fine again. Well, perhaps longer, but we know sheas superior and thus the three weeks will apply to her.a There was utter silence in the room. From a great distance, Marcus heard the d.u.c.h.ess say, aI am fine, Spears. Please, Badger, Maggie, please leave now. Itas important. Please leave.a The three marched out, but their pace was slow.
Marcus very slowly closed the bedchamber door. He then turned the key in the lock. aAre you going to be ill again? Do you need something to eat?a She shook her head.
It was then he realized that she was utterly without color, her eyes dilated, her body hunched over itself.
aDid you know?a he asked, his voice as quiet as a leaf quivering in a breeze.
aNo.a aHow can I believe you?a aYou canat. You said yourself that all Wyndhams were excellent liars, myself included.a aYou are carrying my child. That isnat possible. The three meddling idiots must be wrong. You vomited because of that blow to your head.a aVery well, it isnat possible. But for the sake of argument, letas say itas true. Now, is it to be an immaculate conception or have I cuckolded you? Ah, donat forget my generous lover at Pipwell Cottage.a He sliced his hand through the air. He looked bewildered, disbelieving; he looked like a man whoad just been shot but didnat yet feel the pain. aI donat understand this. Itas true I took you a few times, a very few times, and I didnat have the fort.i.tude to withdraw from you as I do now, but it takes much longer to impregnate a woman, surely it must take many, many times and many, many months.a aEvidently not.a He began to pace. She looked at his flapping dressing gown, his black hairy legs, his bare feet. He was beautiful, this man who didnat want her to have his child. Ah, she was pregnant. Her body had accepted his seed. On their wedding night? That second night head come to her? She wanted to sing and shout and dance. Instead she felt a stirring of the nausea and began to breathe deeply and slowly.
aYou didnat have your monthly flow after we were married in Paris?a She shook her head.
aYouare a d.a.m.ned woman. Didnat it occur to you that something might be different? Namely, me, the man who spilled his seed inside you?a aIam not always as predictable as many women.a aYou mean in that oblique way of yours that your monthly flow doesnat occur necessarily when you expect it to?a She nodded, staring him straight in the eye.
aI donat want this child and you d.a.m.n well know it!a She held silent, though the words were near to breaking through, but she was concentrating too hard on not throwing up to speak.
aYou did this on purpose.a Ah, head finally swung his axe. The look on her face was bleak and accepting, then just as quickly shifted to utter red-faced rage. Even then the old d.u.c.h.ess peeked through as she shrugged saying, aI wondered how long it would take you to fix the blame firmly on my head. My mother told me several times that a man couldnat bear to be in the wrong. She said a man would say whatever he had to say in order to put the woman in the wrong instead.a Then, miraculously, even the rage disappeared. She actually smiled at him. aYou will be a father, Marcus, and I will be a mother. I am pregnant with a child, our child.a aI refuse to accept that your b.a.s.t.a.r.d father has won. Forgive me. Youare the b.a.s.t.a.r.d, but only by birth. He is one in mind and in act. I wonat accept it, d.u.c.h.ess. Do you hear me? I donat accept that youare pregnant.a He slapped his palm to his forehead. aI have done nothing to deserve this, nothing, dammit. I was quite happily going about my life when your father died and I had to be the heir, there was no choice for anyone. Then because heas bitter and twisted, he unleashed his venom on me. He hated me and he proved it, stripping me of all means to maintain and support all the Wyndham estates and properties, unless I married you, his precious b.a.s.t.a.r.d. You, the one woman in the b.l.o.o.d.y world I never wanted, or if I did want you from the time I was fourteen years old and randy as a young stoat, I wouldnat have any longer than it took him to humiliate me to my soul. And yet you forced me to take you.
aI want my life back in my control. I want you and your d.a.m.ned child out of it.a He stomped toward the adjoining door, only to draw up at her quiet voice. aI see. Do you wish me to leave tomorrow, Marcus?a aI would that you leave tonight, right this b.l.o.o.d.y instant, but that would be cruel. You would probably faint on the front steps.a He slammed the adjoining door behind him.
She stared for a long moment at that closed door. Then, slowly, she lightly touched her stomach. She was flat, but inside her womb was her child, their child.
She was lying there, staring up at the ceiling, when there was a knock on the door. She rose and unlocked it. Badger, Spears, and Maggie stood there, Maggie with a small covered plate in her hands.
They said nothing, merely came into the bedchamber when she stepped back.
aHere, d.u.c.h.ess, eat there,a Maggie said as she guided her to the chair in front of the fireplace.
The three of them took position about her, saying nothing until she began to nibble on one of Badgeras fresh scones.
aI made them with small apple slices,a he said. aAnd fresh cream. It is my Aunt Mildredas recipe.a aTheyare delicious.a aYour stomach is settling?a Maggie asked.
The d.u.c.h.ess nodded and continued to chew slowly as she stared into the fire.
Spears cleared his throat. aHis lordship is a pa.s.sionate man. He is a natural leader, a man of action. He despises dithering about. In all the battles he fought, his men trusted him above G.o.d. He protected them, drove them relentlessly, and they knew he would willingly die for any of them. They knew this and gave him their best.a Badger continued, aHe is hotheaded, always has been, Mr. Spears tells me, even as a boy. Besides a leader, he is a man who is loyal to his bones. Sometimes, however, he isnat a cool thinker, not what you would call a measured scholar of philosophy. He reacts, then thinks. He can curse some of the most amazing composites Iave ever heard. Then heas calm again and laughing.a aThey say that we women are the ones to lose our calm and spit out whatever comes into our minds,a Maggie said, hands on her silk-covered hips, abut it isnat necessarily true. Just look at you, d.u.c.h.ess, quiet and still as a clam. You never lose your head and scream foolishness. Youare just the opposite of his lordship.a Maggie frowned, then shrugged. aAt least you used to be his opposite. Itas strange, youare different, all of us have noticed it.a Spears said, aIt is true that his lordship occasionally loses his temper and thus control of his tongue, but he will come around, d.u.c.h.ess. Even though you appear to have lost your magnificent reticence, at least when you now choose to lose it, you canat come near to his lordship in sheer undignified temper. He isnat an unfair man, heas justa"a aI know,a she said. aHeas just pa.s.sionate and hotheaded and easily driven over the brink. But know this, all of you. He doesnat want the child. Heas said that often enough, it isnat just something he decided tonight.a aHe is a man. However, he isnat stupid,a Maggie said, frowning. aWell yes, he is, for he is a man, after all, and all men must . . . well, thatas not important here and now, is it? Now, his lordship must realize that babes follow lovemaking. Even as he cursed and ranted, he knew it would be natural for you to become pregnant, for his lordship is a l.u.s.ty mana"a aExactly,a Badger said. aHis temper, his insistence that he doesnat want an heir doesnat make sense. As Maggie said, he isnat stupid.a The d.u.c.h.ess became utterly white and still. aYou donat understand.a The three of them looked baffled.
aYou donat understand,a she said again, slowly, then clamped her mouth shut.
aWell, regardless,a Maggie said, aI know men, d.u.c.h.ess, and his lordship may be proud to the point of you wanting to strangle him, but he will come around. He will come to understand what is right.a aHe will moderate his stand,a Badger said.
aHe will moderate his stand, or we will have to take action,a Spears said, and Badger and Maggie nodded.
She looked at each of them in turn. Finally, she said, aYes, perhaps we will have to take action.a aYou wonat run away, will you, d.u.c.h.ess?a Badger said.
She looked at him thoughtfully.
22.
MARCUS CAME TO an abrupt halt at the bottom of the huge staircase that spilled onto the grand entrance hall of Chase Park. There in front of the front double doors were three valises and beside them stood Maggie, all trimmed out in a flaming red bonnet with a curling ostrich feather curving around to her chin and wearing a dark blue cloak. She was tapping an elegantly shod foot, tap, tap, tap. She was obviously waiting.
She was waiting for the d.u.c.h.ess.
He bellowed, aWhere the h.e.l.l is she, Maggie?a Maggie turned very slowly and gave the earl a deep curtsy. aMy lord, who the h.e.l.l is she?a aDonat you twit my nose, girl, or Ialla"a aThat is quite enough, Marcus. Actually, I am here, but for just the next moment, then Maggie and I are away from Chase Park.a aYou arenat going anywhere, d.a.m.n you.a aBut you were quite clear in your wishes. You wanted me gone immediately, but were afraid your consequence would suffer if it became known that you kicked out your pregnant wife in the middle of the night.a aIt wasnat the b.l.o.o.d.y middle of the night. Nowa"a aThus, in the spirit of bonhomie, I waited until this morning. Good-bye, Marcus.a She turned on her heel, her chin in the air, as regal as the d.a.m.ned d.u.c.h.ess head named her so long ago. Then, she tripped on one of the valises and went crashing down on her side.
He reached her in an instant, hauling her into his arms. aAre you all right? Say something, you d.a.m.ned scourge.a aIam all right. How very embarra.s.sing to be felled in the midst of such an excellent exit.a aYes, thatas what happens when your chin is in the air. However, I wonat laugh, at least not just yet. Now heed me, d.u.c.h.ess. You arenat going anywhere. This is your home and here youall stay.a He shook her. aDo you understand me?a aIam not certain, Marcus. Perhaps youad best shake me again. It makes me think more clearly.a He hauled her to her feet and stared down at her, his look as black and brooding as one of the quixotic Lord Byronas heroes.
aWhy is Chase Park now my home? Why are you singing a different tune this morning? Truly, I donat understand you, my lord.a aIt is your home until I tell you it is not, and even then perhaps it will still be your home, as arguments follow from the night unto the morning and things change in the hours in between. Do you now understand?a aI will never understand you.a aI am a man. Men are not easily fathomed. Our feelings arenat sitting in the middle of a plate for all to comment upon and taste, not like you b.l.o.o.d.y women.a Maggie snorted behind him.
aOh dear,a the d.u.c.h.ess said in that tone of voice he now recognized very well, and he let her go without any hesitation whatsoever.
She ran out the door, down the deep wide marble steps, past a startled gardener who dropped his spade, fell to her knees, and vomited in the rosebushes.