Before Xing could control her thoughts, some more of Fei Lian"s Memory flooded inside her brain.Happiness...
As he watched over the little baby boy grow. He made contact with the little boy, he called "Little Yuan". And he got closer to his grandson who was fearless and with att.i.tude. He didn"t watch his daughter grow, so he will watch her son grow.
Bliss...
As he taught him everything he knew and took him everywhere he went not even heeding the advice of the heavenly emperor. He was really attached to his Little Yuan.
The Heavenly Emperor was interested in him too. He had the blood of three great G.o.ds flowing in his veins after all! He had a higher probability to become their Prince.
But since he showed no sign, he lost interest in little Yuan. And no one knew Little Yuan was Fei Lian"s grandson in the Heavens. ?
But Fei Lian didn"t lose interest .
He loved his grandson mre each pa.s.sing day.
Then there was despair...
The demons were trying to start a war with the G.o.ds and they got an easy target.
It was Fei Lian"s fault for getting too close to his descendant and they tracked his daughter.
It was his fault they got to her!
That day when he watched his daughter getting slaughtered by a bunch of demons.... All he needed to do was snap his fingers for those puny demons to perish but he wasn"t allowed to. And no other G.o.ds helped her too.
The Heavens didn"t allow his interference...
The Heavens didn"t want a war between demons and G.o.ds for an "abomination"
Yes! His daughter was an abomination. Because he broke the rules, he made his daughter an abomination. She was a pure hearted child but his sin was pushed onto her and she became an abomination.
It was his fault. Anyone breaking the Heavenly rules will face consequences.
So he obeyed, he watched....
He didn"t want to break more rules causing more harm.
He didn"t even blink his eyes and watched as his heart got ripped away watching his daughter getting slaughtered... His healthy grandsons being ripped out of his daughter"s belly and killed.... Those powerless demons.
Humans are so fragile. His daughter was one and she was tore to shreds by those demons.
He simply watched as was expected of him.
He should have felt better obeying his Emperor but he didn"t.
Little Yuan wanted revenge and he asked for the permission of the Heavenly Court as what was expected of him.
The descendants of G.o.ds will be protected by other G.o.ds.
Little Yuan was given a divine sword and was taught all the techniques needed.
He avenged his mother and Fei Lian was happy his daughter got avenged.
But what"s the use of revenge after everything is lost?
The proof of that night he spent with Mazu, his only daughter, didn"t comeback. Even after she was avenged.
When he learnt that the Heavens had different plans for his grandson, he just sneered.
Of course they let little Yuan handle the demons without dirtying their hands. Now there is no war between the G.o.ds and demons. The demons are controlled and defeated by a human too. They hit two birds with one stone...
Frustration....
He couldn"t face his Little Yuan anymore and he watched his blood l.u.s.t growing each pa.s.sing day. He became more of a monster each day spilling blood like water turning his hands Scarlet.
Fei Lian still sat on his hands...
It"s the rules! He cannot help his descendant!
He watched...
Then came that priestess... An angel who helped him... Little Yuan loved her and she loved him.
Everything was perfect... Until...
"Look Fei Lian! Your fault! You thought you could save your descendant? He chose a woman who is going to die early. He will die soon in despair. There will be no more of your descendants who are an abomination. Accept the will of heavens and mate with Zhu Rong"
It was the G.o.d of fate who spoke to him in a mocking tone. No one can outdo fate. Even G.o.ds.
Fei Lian tried to do nothing as it was expected of him.
Blood is thicker than water...
It is an obviously true proverb.
He couldn"t...
So he warned Little Yuan to stay away from that girl to protect his heart. But he didn"t listen.
He was his grandson and his rebel blood flowed in him and he didn"t listen to authority either.
Pain...
As he watched his Little Yuan growing distant from him. And then he did it!
Asking Old Rong"s help.
His enemy who vowed to end his descendants.
He watched as Little Yuan seeking that liar"s help.
Fei Lian stepped back.
What could he do..?
He cannot break Heavenly rules.
Time pa.s.sed. His grandson was cursed.
Fei Lian watched his descendants peris.h.i.+ng like May flies. As if their duty is to create the next generation, they died immediately after.
Fei Lian watched.
He thought it would get easier to see his descendants die one by one but no... It hurt more and more as he watched them die. Each pa.s.sing generation, his heart ached more.
What did I get following the Heavenly rules, again?
Despair!
Two centuries pa.s.sed.
Then there she was....
The one who changed it all....
Xing who was seeing and feeling everything Fei Lian saw and felt could feel the odd emotion. The emotion filled with pride and joy. Some emotion she had never known till now, maybe because it belonged to those who had seen their next generation flourish.
It was a cave...
Mingling?
Mother?
Xing"s eyes filled with tears watching her mother after a long time. She looked really young.
Wait...
There she was... A little limp baby in Fei Lian"s hands. Her lips were purple and her breathing was shallow.
It is me?
Then Xing sank into the memory.
Confusing noises we"re heard around.
"Not the one"
"No twin"
"kill her"
"Just a female"
"No use"
Fei Lian saw the little baby trying her best to live. She really looked like his daughter.
"abomination"
The G.o.ds were saying.
That word again!
Fei Lian sneered in his heart.
"Let"s take her life then"
The G.o.ds who were waiting around like vultures waiting for its prey to die, decided.
Xing could feel Fei Lian shudder as he heard it.
Kill her?
No way!
I"m not letting this child meet the same fate as my daughter.
I will protect her.
If rules aren"t giving me happiness, I will break them!
Xing could feel the soft feeling in Fei Lian"s hands.
It was her and she was so soft and so cute even though she was dying. Even if she knew it was her, she couldn"t believe it was her. Never in her life has she ever seen such a beautiful baby.
Then Fei Lian put that mark on her back and proclaimed that she is his pet and he wanted her alive.
Relief....
He broke the Heavenly rule for the first time while he was thinking straight and purposefully. And...
It felt good!
From then on he watched over her. He tried to keep his distance fearing he might cause her to end up the same way as Little Yuan. She had a lot of responsibilities as mandated by the Heavens. That made him scared.
Exhilaration!
Xing could feel it as his memory of their first meeting in close quarters.
Wow! I was a cute baby! She thought.
Then there were many skips. Everytime he felt the need to break the Heavenly rules for her. The way he cringed everytime some G.o.d mentioned that he was grooming a human child as his bride.
He wanted to scream out but he could not. For her... To protect her.
Then that day she asked "Would you have helped Master Yuan save his child?"
The emotions he felt.
He would have.... He did, didn"t he? He did. Because they were his descendants too.
Him relentlessly staying close to her not letting her push him away...
Him pausing the time for her...
His plight to rush to her when she was worrying about how to kill Old Rong....
The pride he felt when he saw her destroying Old Rong...
The hurt he felt when he learnt what Zhu Rong and Mazu did to her...
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Even recently.... The timely arrival of the Heavenly Emperor to the Audience hall of the Fire Kingdom. Even if it was slightly missed, Zhu Rong would have escaped, unscathed and she would have lost her trial.
The last thing she felt was Fei Lian"s parting message to her that was filled with kindness, gentleness, pride and thoughtfulness laced with a little sorrow.
"Do what you wish with your life, little one. You have me and Mazu to make sure you get all of your wishes granted. And remember even though you cannot meet me, I can watch over you"
"Thank you", Xing said as she could feel the effect of the spell wearing off.
Thank you Fei Lian!
Xing knelt on the muddy ground holding the urn in her hand.
That"s when she realised, she never have done anything worthwhile.
Everytime she did something, she was always watched. She always had a big safety net below her. Even if she failed, nothing bad would have happened.
Fei Lian was protecting her.... Her master was protecting her.... Chenglei was protecting her....
Did I achieve anything by myself?
All I ever did was just do as I wished.
Divine ruler?
What a joke I am!
But....
If I think the other way, I didn"t ask anyone of them to do anything for me, right? They all did what they did out of their own volition. They did what made them happy, right?
I was the only one who was forced to do what I didn"t want to do and I did it.
So, it is not my concern.
They all loved me.
They all... Chenglei too....
The thought of him made her sigh.
What more should I do for him to trust me? Will he believe me if I say it thousand and tenth time? That I love him. Him and only him? That I would give up my life as a G.o.d for him? That I would take the t.i.tle if someone else"s wife for him?
Ahhh!
I should return back to him.
That is what I always wanted and that is what I will do.
I will stay by his side, no matter what.
Even if he thinks I"m a wh*re. Even if he thinks I ran off to my lover. Even if he thinks I want to be superior to him.
But first I should bury Master Yuan with his wife.
Xing stood up and she saw a couple of dogs in front of her.
They were the big breed of hunter dogs they used to raise in the Imperial Palace and in high n.o.bles houses.
"What are you doing here?", she asked.
And they pleaded her to follow them and help their mistress who is in distress.
Who"d need my help now?
Xing wondered and she apologised to her Master for postponing his burial and followed the guard dogs.
It is ways best to help the living than fulfilling the wish of the dead.
They walked a distance and there she saw a small house in tee deep mountains.
"Who lives here? And why?"
Xing wondered but hearing cries of deep pain, she ran towards the house.
Upon entering, she saw the last person she thought she"d meet that day.
And what happened there made her scared to return to Chenglei.