So, my Grandmother Frida became the emissary of peace in my family when she at long last convinced my parents, my mother in particular, to give up on useless dreams.
Now that I was home on spring break from UCLA, I was ready to relax and have some fun, and as always, was open to the possibility of finding love. A family reunion wasn"t exactly what I had in mind, although I was looking forward to some good home cooking. After too much Taco Bell, I had almost forgotten the pleasure of handmade flour tortillas.
Breakfast had been over for hours, but I had to help myself to one last warm tortilla and generously slathered it with b.u.t.ter. I took a huge bite, savoring the heady taste and textures combining in my mouth. Too much of this sort of thing might start expanding my backside to an uncomfortable point, but for now, I had a feminine plumpness that still turned the heads of both s.e.xes. What mattered to me most was the attention I received from soft butches. They were the s.e.xiest women on earth as far as I was concerned, and never failed to attract me.
My last girlfriend, Davila, had been femme like me. She was pretty in a cla.s.sic Latina way, full chest and mouth and not much of a backside. Her best feature were her dark chocolate-colored eyes framed by striking thin eyebrows like Greta Garbo"s. We met at the beginning of my first semester, breaking up amicably by the end of it when we decided we were better as friends than lovers. In our last conversation, we had talked about what we both wanted from a relationship and how we would never find it together.
"Emilia, I knew we wouldn"t last from the minute we first kissed,"
Davila had said.
"Why is that?" I asked.
"Remember how we looked at each other waiting for someone to make a move? You finally kissed me, and although it was enjoyable, I felt like you were taking on a role you really didn"t like."
"Well, that"s true. I don"t like to be the one who makes the first move. I like a woman who knows what she wants and then grabs it, especially when it"s me."
"Exactly. That"s why you will never be completely happy with a femme. You need a more butch woman. A woman who is more comfortable taking charge. I"m not that kind of a woman and neither are you."
"You make us sound completely helpless. I"m a strong, single- minded Chicana, like my mother and grandmother before her. It"s just that when it comes to intimacy, I like my lover to take control. There are enough other areas in life for me to exhibit power in the relationship.
Besides, control isn"t just physical, is it?"
"Emilia, I was never your match, but I do hope you find her someday."
"So do I. I hope we both find what we"re looking for."
Thinking back on our conversation made me feel vulnerable and melancholy. I wondered if I would ever find that missing link, that other half to make me complete. My mother bustled into the kitchen carrying several bags of groceries with my grandmother Frida following close behind.
"Are you going to sit there all day, mi hija? I have your sisters scrubbing the bathrooms, your father cleaning up the backyard, and your abuela is going to help me cut up meat and vegetables for the fajitas.
Maybe you can bring in the rest of the shopping bags," my mother said before she had set down a single bag of food.
My abuela smiled and winked at me conspiratorially. "Your mother has been barking orders all morning. I even saluted once," she said.
Her daughter sighed dramatically, hands on hips, until I nodded and went to bring in the last of the bags, wondering if we were planning on feeding the entire neighborhood. My mother continued to direct the family as if she were in command of an intricate military operation.
There was no choice but to go AWOL. I went upstairs and got ready for the reunion.
By the time I reemerged downstairs, the first of my relatives were arriving. I hugged favorite aunts, uncles, nieces, and nephews, needing to be introduced to many I hadn"t seen before or in a long time. My parents always made sure to mention proudly that I was home from college. The attention embarra.s.sed me a little, but it was nice to be bragged about. I wandered into the backyard, dug a soda out of the ice cooler, and sat down on a wicker chair. The warm weather bad been perfect for shorts but now I regretted the decision when the wicker fibers kept pinching the backs of my legs. I adjusted my shorts self-consciously. There was nothing to do but try to get through the long, boring night with as little pain as possible. I studied the stars, looked at the faraway tiny suns, and imagined my true love out there somewhere among the cosmos. A shooting star caught my attention and I thought about making a wish. Some cynical part of me resisted, though I gave in to my hopes and dreams and made it anyway.
I was in the midst of a large gulp of soda when the most attractive woman I had ever seen came into the backyard. My throat closed up and I coughed and sputtered loudly, causing her to turn and look at me. I felt my face blossoming into a sunburned shade of red as I wiped my eyes and tried to smile. She was devastatingly gorgeous.
The stranger wore tight blue jeans and a blouse with its long sleeves rolled up. She wasn"t wearing a bra; her small bust didn"t need it, though what gave her away were adorable, pert nipples that insisted on pushing through the blouse"s flimsy material. Her dark hair was very straight and short, reaching only the nape of her neck, but it seemed shorter because she had both sides tucked behind her ears. She had soft, honey-colored skin tone that matched my own and large, almond-shaped eyes. The firmness in her jawline intrigued me the most, as it gave strength to her face along with a boyish handsomeness. My legs trembled and for once I was glad to be sitting in that uncomfortable wicker chair. The backs of my knees were sweating at the same rate that the heat and moistness grew insistently between them.
She looked at me and our eyes locked as the intensity with which I had stared at her was equally returned. I wondered for a morose second if maybe she was a cousin or niece and thought about the possibility I might be contemplating incest with a close relative. Such an awkward complication must be considered when anyone falls into l.u.s.t with an appealing visitor at a family reunion. As she approached, I drank my soda as if dying of thirst.
"Do you mind if I sit down here?" she asked, motioning to the chair next to me.
I was trying not to imagine the places where I wanted her to sit, preferably naked, so I simply shook my head in the negative.
After all that staring, we now both couldn"t make eye contact, even though I was sure she was looking at me whenever I glanced away. She opened her can of soda as I gazed at her hands. They were large and smooth. There wasn"t any jewelry on her fingers, though she wore a slender leather bracelet on one wrist. She also had a necklace with a single charm of the letter L. L for lesbian, perhaps?
I finished the last of my soda and before I set the can down, she stood up.
"Would you like another one? I"ll go get you one," she said before I answered. I watched her walk away, staring at her tantalizing backside, so perfectly framed in those tight pants. There was a confidence in her step, a certain glide I had often noted in butch women that made my insides tingle and my ears itch. On her way back I noticed her eyes on my bare legs, so I crossed them as s.e.xily as I could. She tripped, stumbled, and dropped right into my lap. Exactly what I wanted, although not in front of all my family members. The wicker chair rocked dangerously, then tilted backward as we both fell in a heap on the soft gra.s.s. I laughed, huge bursts of giggles that broke the tension.
"I"m sorry, I"m sorry," she kept saying until she realized we weren"t hurt, then joined in my laughter.
"Let"s get out of here," I said as I noticed some of my relatives watching. I grabbed her wrist and led her out a side gate into the front yard where it was quiet. We went over to the sidewalk and sat down on the curb.
"My name"s Emilia," I said.
"I"m Louisa. But you can call me Lou."
I leaned in very close, obviously startling her, although she didn"t pull back. I noticed her lips parting as if expecting me to kiss her. I didn"t.
"What are you doing?" she finally asked.
"I"m trying to see if there"s a resemblance or anything to my side of the family."
She laughed lightly. "You won"t find one. Although you"re very beautiful and I wouldn"t mind looking like you, I"m not related to you."
I was so abuzz over her compliment that it took a moment to register what else she had said. "We"re not relatives?"
"Well, technically maybe, though not by blood. I"m the half sister of your cousin Ricky"s ex-wife."
"So, you mean there"s no chance of our children being born with two heads?"
""Not a chance." Lou grinned and tilted toward me as if searching for something. My lips parted slightly but she didn"t back off as I had done. Instead she looked around quickly, then cupped my chin with one hand and kissed me once, firmly. Our tongues barely touched, but the thrill of contact made my p.u.s.s.y contract.
"I don"t usually kiss strangers," I said playfully.
"Hey, I thought we were familia."
I laughed, breathing in her scent, a rich woodsy freshness that intoxicated me. I felt lost in her aura and wondered if perhaps I was falling in love. It was as if I had found my true mirror image, the femme counterpart of myself reflected within her butch masculinity. She had the potential to be everything my ex, Davila, could never be or hope to be. I wanted Louisa like I had never wanted any woman. But what did she want of me? Maybe just a quick exchange of fluids and then adios?
"I still don"t know anything about you," I said breathlessly.
""Ok, let"s see. I"m twenty-eight. Single. Chicana, of course. I"m a nursing student at USC in my final year. And most important, I think I"m falling in love with you."
I kept finding it difficult to focus. Her eyes were alight with intelligence, and something more, love? A part of me was afraid of moving too quickly, afraid of being disappointed.
"Well, you don"t know anything about me," I countered.
"You"re wrong. Your grandmother, Frida, filled me in when I first arrived. She cornered me in the living room and told me all about you. I have to say I agree with her. I happen to think we would be perfect together, too."
I stared at her with my mouth open, which she took as a signal to move in for another kiss. This time when our lips met, our tongues had time to explore and taste each other. When we parted, both of us breathing fast, I said, "Come with me."
I took her inside, past several staring relatives in the living room, including my smiling Abuelita Frida, up the stairs, and into my bedroom. The moment I turned the lock in place, Louisa had me in her arms in a tight embrace. I secured my fingers behind the back of her neck, entangled in the thick silky hair as our lips met and parted in a lingering, wet kiss. We devoured each other"s mouths while our bodies pressed together, my generous curves yielding to her leaner, firmer build. Her large hands, which I had so admired earlier, were now smoothing themselves over the contours of my heavy b.r.e.a.s.t.s, down the soft swell of my belly and backside. Every place she touched rocked me with desire, and I perceived a similar need building within her as well.
She abruptly pulled her mouth away, gasping in an effort to catch her breath.
"I want to make love to you, Emilia. If you don"t want to, we should stop now. You"re driving me wild. I know this is crazy but I feel like I"ll die if I don"t have you right now."
I opened my eyes, my mouth still pursed in motion of a kiss. Every nerve was on fire, as if I might go up in flames ignited by nothing more than the warmth of her breath on me. Only her touch could quench the overwhelming yearning inside of me. I answered her by unb.u.t.toning her shirt. With each b.u.t.ton I released, I kissed the soft, warm flesh I exposed. I had been right earlier. She wasn"t wearing a bra. My efforts eventually uncovered two small, pert b.r.e.a.s.t.s with large erect nipples. I licked each one teasingly as she panted and reached for my top, pulling it up over my head. Before she could get hold of my bra strap, I undid it myself more easily and my full b.r.e.a.s.t.s came tumbling into view. She buried her face in them, drawing me closer, her soft moans echoing my own. I noticed her intention of catching one of my hard nipples within her mouth, but I stopped her by backing away toward the bed. There was a look of l.u.s.ty determination in her smile as she took off the rest of her clothing while I did the same.
She wrapped her arms around me and carried me to the bed, then settled in next to me. I watched the joy on her face as she scanned me from head to toe, all the while running her hand down the length of my body. My juices were overflowing by the time she reached my warm mound. Her gentle fingers spread its lips, exploring the liquid desire she found. As her fingertips brushed against my hard c.l.i.t, she withdrew them and put them in her mouth, smiling at the taste. She kissed me again, hard, her lips bruising mine, as I too shared in the essence of my inner folds. Our bodies crushed against one another, burning flesh rubbing, squeezing until she ended up on top of me. My thighs opened and at last, our aching p.u.s.s.ies converged, the heat and wetness we generated mingling together. She released my mouth to give her full attention to my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, pausing just briefly within the valley between them and then flicking over my right nipple with tongue and teeth until she finally drew it completely into her mouth. She sucked greedily and steadily, first one and then the other as I writhed in delight.
I reached down between her thighs and spread her warm p.u.s.s.y with my hand, her slippery wetness allowing my fingers to move with ease up and down her engorged c.l.i.t. She was forced to release my nipples as she tried to m.u.f.fle her groans by burying her face between my b.r.e.a.s.t.s. No longer able to stand the pleasure my hand produced, she grasped both of my wrists and held them above my bead as she stared at me, her face aglow with love and longing. She kissed me once more, then traveled her way down my body, ending her journey between my p.u.s.s.y lips, kissing them open with her face. Her soft groans matched my own as she teased my c.l.i.t with her tongue in steady, demanding flicks. I was already so wet it didn"t take long before a huge o.r.g.a.s.m erupted over me, and I grabbed a pillow to m.u.f.fle my scream of release while I rode the waves of bliss.
Afterward, Louisa lay next to me, again rubbing my belly as I slowly came back to my senses. Desire and hunger still gleamed in her eyes, needs that hadn"t been quenched yet. I moved on top of her, my b.r.e.a.s.t.s and long hair spilling onto her chest as she wrapped her arm around my waist.
"Wait, what are you doing?"
"It"s your turn," I said, sliding down her body. She stopped me with shaky hands.
"You don"t have to do that. I"m happy just making you happy."
I shook my head. "It"s not going to work like that Don"t you see? I want you the same way you want me. To me it"s not making love unless we both are satisfied."
She gave me a strange look as if she"d never thought about it that way or never had the opportunity to and slowly, reluctantly parted her legs, her p.u.s.s.y opening like an exotic flower. I dived in like a bee drawn to nectar as I explored her inner warmth, licking and sucking until, trembling, she strove to open them even farther apart for me. I was relentless in my pursuit of both of our pleasures, capturing her c.l.i.t between my gentle teeth and strong tongue until she began to buck wildly against my mouth with her hips. Her hands clawed the sheets as she shook with the force of her o.r.g.a.s.m"s onslaught that made her call out, "Emilia, mi amor!"
I lapped up the last traces of her sweetness, kissed her now- reposing flower, then reclined beside her. Her eyes were closed as I searched her face, feeling a sense of contentment that I had pleased her so fully. When she opened them to meet my eyes, the depth of love I saw reflected there was almost overpowering. Louisa gathered me into her arms and we held each other tightly, both of us giving silent prayers of thanks that our years of longing had finally been a.s.suaged.
Since that first night, we have been inseparable. It wasn"t long after spring break that we moved in together in an off-campus apartment, both of us intent on finishing school. Last year we celebrated our fifth anniversary in my parents" backyard where we had first met. We decided to have a small commitment ceremony and invited the family for another reunion. Even though some members didn"t show up, my parents and sisters were there. My mother insisted on calling it simply a family reunion, but Abuela Frida made sure everyone remembered what it truly was by throwing rice and singing her version of "I Love You Truly" in Spanish. It wasn"t just a family gathering, but a ceremony celebrating the union of Louisa and me. For me, it was a true reunion with the lost part of myself, mi otra mitad, Louisa, my other half, who had been missing for so long and was found at last.
BONUS NIGHT.
RADCLYFFE.
e"re causing a stir," Allie murmured as she and Ryan waited for the elevator in the lobby of the Four Seasons W Hotel. A woman in a floor-length gown and dripping with diamonds stared at them with an expression of distaste. Allie supposed it wasn"t every day that the guests of the five-star hotel saw two women dressed in leather from head to foot. Allie ran her gaze over Ryan"s long, rangy body. As always, she was dressed totally in black: tight T-shirt, studded belt, motorcycle pants and boots, and-Allie knew from personal experience-a thick black c.o.c.k strapped around her lean hips.
Allie smiled and jutted her hips so that her already short black leather skirt rode dangerously close to her crotch. "You are just too hot to go unnoticed."
"I think it"s more likely to be you, babe." Grinning, Ryan traced an index finger down the center of Allie"s chest, dipping inside the deeply scooped Lycra top to skim over her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. A gasp of outrage was audible behind them, and Ryan laughed.
"I love you when you misbehave, but I"m not so sure about the rest of this," Allie said as the elevator opened and they stepped into the empty car. Not surprisingly, the woman waiting with them did not get on. "What if the client isn"t happy about me coming along?"
Ryan leaned her shoulder against the wall. "Trust me, I know her."
"She might just see another top as compet.i.tion."
"She"s hinted at things. She"ll like it."
"Well, we know she likes you," Allie said, "since she calls you every time she"s in town."
"Jealous?" Ryan teased.
"If I got jealous every time you went out on a call, I wouldn"t have time for anything else." Allie leaned close and cupped Ryan"s crotch.
""Considering how popular you are."
Ryan murmured in approval but the tiniest bit of unease flickered in her eyes. "It"s just work. You know that, right?"
"I"ve known since the first night we met that women pay to top you, baby," Allie said, "since that"s how we met." She laughed. "I still can"t believe Cindy and Jeri hired you to be my slave for the night. I"ll never be able to repay them for that little present."
""Neither will I." Ryan nuzzled Allie"s neck, sucking hard enough on the soft skin at the base of her throat to elicit a groan.
"I don"t remember hearing you ask if you could do that," Allie said in a dangerously soft tone of voice, pressing her palm flat against Ryan"s chest and pushing her back against the wall. "Have you already forgotten that tonight you"ll still be a slave?" She edged her thigh between Ryan"s and quickly drove her knee into Ryan"s c.o.c.k. "Hers and mine."
Ryan stiffened from the unexpected pain and the pleasure that followed immediately from the pressure on her c.l.i.t. "I"m sorry."
""Not as sorry as you"ll be if you forget your manners, especially in front of another mistress,"
"She"s not my mistress," Ryan whispered.
"For however long she pays you to be, she is," Allie said sternly.
Then she kissed Ryan softly and stroked the thick lock of dark hair that fell over her forehead back from her face. "You have my permission to please her in any way she requires."
"Yes, Allie."
The elevator opened into a quiet hallway, dimly lit with sconces at intervals along the corridor. They made their way to the corner suite, where Ryan knocked. A moment later, the door opened and a woman with collar-length, honey blond hair regarded them silently. Allie judged her to be somewhere in her late forties or early fifties. She was Ryan"s height and several inches taller than Allie, statuesque in a cla.s.sic way.
Her full b.r.e.a.s.t.s were evident beneath a black silk shirt, the top three b.u.t.tons of which were open to reveal creamy cleavage. Her waist, circled by a thin black belt, was not narrow, but appeared solid beneath tailored charcoal trousers. Her hands, one of which rested loosely on the doork.n.o.b, were large and elegant.
"Ryan." she said by way of greeting before her gaze shifted to Allie and traveled slowly over her body. "I didn"t realize we were having company."
"If it pleases you," Ryan said softly, "Allie will see that you are well served."
"Really," the blonde said with interest. She turned her cool blue eyes to Allie. "Is she yours, then?"
"Yes."
"May I ask why you"re willing to share?"
"I"ve never seen her work. I"d enjoy that."
The blonde nodded thoughtfully, then held the door open wide.
"I"m Deirdre. Please come in."
Deirdre led the way through the suite, to where an iced bottle of champagne stood in a gold-plated cooler beside a king-sized bed. A platter of cheese, fruit, and crackers had been placed on a nearby table, next to which was an oversized silk-upholstered chair. She indicated the food with a sweep of her arm. """Please, help yourself."
Ryan stood next to the chair while Allie poured a gla.s.s of champagne and handed it to Deirdre. Then she poured one of her own and lifted a plump ripe strawberry to her lips. She bit into the strawberry, then sipped the champagne, noting the hungry look in Deirdre"s eyes as she stared at Ryan.