Li Chuntao could barely hear what the doctor was telling her but she understood what he said anyway. With her eyes fixated to her twin sister, her hand tightened its grasp on Li Xiuying"s hand. Not only did her sister lose her baby but she suffered several bone fractures and a head trauma like Song Zexi who was also in an ICU room still in critical condition. Li Xiuying also had a cardiac arrest and while the doctors managed to keep her alive the damage on her brain hadn"t been avoided.
"I"m sorry, Miss Li. We did everything we could but…" His voice trailed off.
The doctor gave her a look of sympathy. He didn"t need to elaborate on what this could mean for Li Chuntao. Li Xiuying"s brain activity was so low that even if she lived, she would be bedridden for the rest of her life.
The machines attached to her were the ones keeping her alive. Her heart might still be beating but she was clinically dead. There was no way they would be able to restore her in perfect condition unless a miracle happened which was a rarity.
Li Chuntao shut her eyes. A single tear managed to roll down her cheeks. She was visibly shaking from the news. How could this happen to Ying? This wasn"t supposed to happen at all!
This couldn"t be happening. She told herself over and over again. Everything was just a bad dream and that dream would be over as soon as she opened her eyes.
Yes, that must be it! She must have been exhausted from her long s.h.i.+ft at work and had fallen asleep somewhere. It wasn"t the first time she pa.s.sed out from exhaustion anyway. Her twin sister couldn"t possibly be involved in an accident and now lying on her deathbed.
However, her reality was just cruel. Too cruel. Li Chuntao just couldn"t get away from it.
As she opened her eyes again, the nightmare wasn"t disappearing and she could still see Ying"s pale face with a bruise darkening on her collarbone. She couldn"t imagine how hard it was for Ying to be submerged in cold water for too long, wondering if someone would rescue her.
She fell on her knees as the tears she"d been trying to keep at bay burst from her. Her vision became blurry as she cried out for her twin sister. The pain on her chest hurt so much that she had to grip the sheets on the bed for support.
She had seen this scene countless times, whether on dramas she was watching or in her workplace but Li Chuntao never thought that she would also experience the same heart-wrenching pain of seeing a loved one in this state.
"Chuntao!" Zheng Yue gasped as she saw her niece broke down. She rushed and knelt down beside Li Chuntao. She covered her mouth with both hands as she cried alongside her niece.
They had already expected that Li Chuntao would be devastated from the news but seeing her like this, they weren"t prepared for it.
"Ying! How can you do this to me?! You promised me! You promised me!" She wailed, as she held her sister"s hand.
"I also advise you to consider allowing us to unplug her life a.s.sistance…" The doctor announced, which felt like a stab directly on Li Chuntao"s chest.
As if the pain she was suffering wasn"t enough, the doctor gave them Ying"s prognosis.
"She wouldn"t be the same if she lived through this.."
This was the scene Shen Zichen found when he came to visit the private room where Li Xiuying was. He silently closed the door behind him and didn"t dare to utter a single word. The doctor a.s.signed to Li Xiuying gave him a nod and excused himself from the Li family.
The scene was heartbreaking for those who"d witnessed it that even the cold and stern Li Yuren couldn"t stop shedding tears for his nieces.
"Sister, I have failed you," he thought, but it was also hard for him to make a decision right now.
If he allowed the doctors to pull out Ying"s life support, Chuntao wouldn"t be able to take it but if he continued to keep Ying in this state, there was no a.s.surance that she would come back to them.
"Ying, please wake up..."
Although Li Chuntao knew of the possibility that her twin sister would never wake up again, she still wasn"t ready to give her up yet. No, not like this. She wasn"t ready to lose her yet! She didn"t want to have the last memory of her sister lying on her deathbed as the doctor asks them for permission to cease her own suffering.
"How could you do this to me?" She continued to wail beside Ying, "We made plans…are you going to ditch me again? Didn"t you promise you would never leave me alone?"
If she didn"t have Ying by her side when their parents pa.s.sed away, Li Chuntao didn"t think she would be able to overcome the pain and grief alone. Li Xiuying had been her support all this time, the one who constantly supports her, loves her as no other could.
How would she be able to live knowing that a part of her was missing?
They were born at the same time, swore that they would be best friends forever, that no matter where they were, they would always be connected. The loss of a twin hurts longer, and more intensely than the loss of nearly anyone else. There was no grief so shattering as losing your twin.
"If I promise you to call you my Ying Jie, would you wake up?" It was a silly attempt for her to bargain at her half-dead sister. "Ying, please… please…"
Her words made Zheng Yue cry harder. Li Xiuying had always teased her younger twin about it, always pestering Chuntao to call her Ying Jie while the latter refused to agree every time.
However, Li Xiuying remained unresponsive. No matter how many times Li Chuntao spoke to her and called her name, it was simply futile. As she watched her sister"s form, Li Chuntao felt a profound sense of loss. She"d already lost her parents, what would happen to her if she also loses Ying now?
Li Chuntao knew that she would be nothing without her twin sister, that she wouldn"t be able to forgive herself for living while knowing her twin sister had departed this world to join their parents.
She felt like there"s n.o.body in the world who can compare to the relations.h.i.+p she had with Ying. n.o.body could understand the pain of a twinless twin unless he or she experienced the same loss.
Shen Zichen lowered his head, trying to hide the tears and guilt on his face. He was about to lose Li Xiuying and he couldn"t do anything to stop it from happening. He clenched his fist on his side and could feel his nails digging on his palm but the pain wasn"t comparable to what Chuntao was having right now.
Li Chuntao released her sister"s hand and curled on the floor as she continued to cry her heart out. She couldn"t stand the pain anymore. She would rather die with Ying than to be left behind.