"That"s not going to happen."
Tori looked at Madoc. "She knows she"ll die, too. I"ve sensed the knowledge inside her. When things were bada"when the blood they fed me nearly killed mea"I sensed her fear of death."
"Is it true?" Madoc asked Nika. "Will you die if you"re with Tori when she dies?"
"If she dies. She doesn"t know that will happen."
"You"re evading my question. Will you die, too?"
Nika bowed her head. "Yes. I think so."
Madoc pulled her against his side, holding her close. Even within this nonphysical s.p.a.ce, she still felt comforted by his touch. That comfort allowed her the strength to keep fighting for her sister.
"What if I were to promise to leave your mind before the baby comes?"
"It"s not a baby," snarled Tori, whirling around and baring her teeth. "It"s a thing. A monster."
Nika held up her hands and kept her voice calm. "I"m sorry. I didn"t understand."
Madoc"s grip had tightened and his stance had shifted so that he was between Tori and Nika. "I agree with Tori that you can"t risk your life, but what if there"s another way?"
"What way?"
"Did you see anything the night they took you? Street signs, buildings, landmarks of any kind?"
"A few, maybe."
He looked to Nika. "If I can see those memories, I might be able to figure out where she went."
"How?"
"I"ve roamed this country for years. I remember everything I see. I might be able to recognize something in her memories."
"It"s worth a shot," said Nika. "What do you think, Tori? Will you let him try?"
Tori stepped closer. Madoc pushed Nika behind him as if he needed to protect her from her own sister.
Nika moved out of his reach and saw Tori"s dirty hand press over Madoc"s brow.
A second later, the room exploded in a million shards of light, and Nika and Madoc were flung out of Tori"s mind.
Tori shivered in the cold dark. She kept her eyes closed for as long as possible, holding on to the memory of that sunrise. She could almost feel the heat of it on her skin, the way it had driven back the tainted blood they"d shoved into her.
For a moment, Tori had almost felt like a real person again, rather than a thing to be used.
Tears leaked out from behind her closed lids, their warmth startling against her chilled skin. She missed Nika so much. Having her in her mind had been so nice. So comforting.
She couldn"t let it happen again. If birthing the thing inside her didn"t kill her, she knew what would happen. She didn"t want Nika there when Zillah hurt her againa"put another thing inside her.
Before, wishing for death had been easy. She"d had nothing to live for but more pain and loneliness. But now, thanks to Madoc, she found herself craving the sun and its warmth.
She wanted to live long enough to feel sunlight on her skin for real, just one more time.
If Zillah ever found out, he"d see that desire as a weakness to use against her. He"d taunt her with it, dangle it in front of her in an effort to gain her cooperation, then take away all hope of her ever having it.
Tori wasn"t going to let him have this, too. She was going to bury Madoc"s gift deep, locking it away where Zillah would never sense it. And then, when she felt death coming for her, she"d pull the memory out and wrap it around her so she wouldn"t have to die alone in the darkness.
Chapter 16.
Madoc felt like someone had snapped a giant rubber band against his brain.
He was back inside his real body, crumpled in a heap on the floor with Nika. His stomach heaved dangerously. He tried to extract himself from her so he wouldn"t throw up on her, but before he could, his stomach settled and his head"s spinning began to slow.
Madoc let out a low moan, unable to stop the unmanly noise from escaping.
Nika was panting. "Sorry. It"s not usually that rough."
Madoc helped Nika sit up until her back was propped against the couch. "I would really prefer it if we never did that again."
"I"ll try to warn you next time," she said.
At least then he could brace himself.
"Do you know where Tori is?" she asked.
Tori had sent a barrage of images into his head a split second before shoving him and Nika away. Those images were there, in his mind, but were too much of a jumbled mess to make sense of. "I"m going to have to sort out the images first. It may take a while."
"You know we don"t have much time."
"I know. But I also know that we"re not going to rescue her and the others alone. We need to gather the mena"go in with everyone we can find. We"ll go back to Dabyr and talk to Joseph so we can plan our attack." He wasn"t sure if Joseph would let him come along or not. He might simply lock him in a cell beneath Dabyr until Nika"s new Theronai was found.
The idea of being imprisoned like that made something dark and dangerous rise up in him. His soul might not have completely died, but he clearly wasn"t rid of the blackness that had nearly consumed him. He was going to have to fight it back and struggle to do what he knew was right.
Maybe he could convince Joseph to let him go on this one last mission. They would need all the help they could get, and there weren"t many men alive who were better with a blade than he was.
"I told you I"m not going back there," said Nika.
"I"m not going to imprison you. I really wish you"d stop worrying about it."
"I have to worry. There"s too much at stake."
She was right about that. She just didn"t know how right yet. "We"re just going back to gather the men."
"You won"t try to make me stay there while you go after her?" Her voice sounded uncertain, untrusting.
"If we need you, you"ll be right by my side."
"Exactly. If you need me. You won"t. You don"t think you need anyone."
"I need you," he said. "Without you I die. Isn"t that enough?"
"No. Not even close. I want what Helen and Drake have. What Paul and Andra have."
"We can have that, too," he lied, unwilling to crush her dreams just yet. She"d have thema"just not with him. "It"s going to take some time. I can"t risk your life now, while you still have so much to learn. You don"t even know how to protect yourself."
"I"ll learn."
"Before Tori"s baby is born?"
"Yes. I"ll go into Gilda"s mind. Learn from her."
Madoc lifted her hand, pointing to her burned fingers. "Looks like you tried that with Helen and it didn"t exactly work out, did it?"
"I need to do this, Madoc. She"s my sister. I promise I won"t take any unnecessary risks."
As she uttered the words, Madoc felt them settle over his shoulders, their weight rea.s.suring.
Maybe this was one of those times when he needed to give in. Compromise. She"d promised to be careful and was now bound to abide by that promise. Maybe this partnership thing meant he needed to give her something in return. It might be the last thing he ever gave her.
Playing nice wasn"t his strong suit, but a lot had changed in the past few hours. For Nika, he had to try to be a better man.
"I promise that we"re only going back to Dabyr long enough to gather our forces and to figure out where Tori is. If I leave to fight, you can come with me. Okay?" It still gave him an out. If Joseph locked him up, Nika would have to stay at Dabyr, where she"d be safe.
Nika nodded. "That wasn"t exactly a promise never to imprison me, but I"ll take what I can get for now. Tori has to come first."
"Good. Then it"s settled. Let"s grab Drake and Helen and head home."
John woke to an empty bed.
It wasn"t the first time it had happened, but it had never before hurt like it did now. He and Meghan spent yesterday together talking, laughing and getting to know each other while road crews worked to clear the highways. Her rental car had been towed so it could be repaired. John had thought she"d stay with him at least until it was done. Especially after last night, after making love so many times he swore he"d be able to tell the difference between her and a thousand other women simply by the way she breathed, by the feel of her skin.
Apparently, he"d been wrong.
The note she"d left on her pillow said she"d taken a cab to the airport. She had to get home, back to her life.
What about his life?
It seemed so empty and bleak without her in it. She"d brought music to his world, and now that she was gone, everything was gray silence.
John wasn"t about to let it end like this. John had met countless women, but Meghan was the first one who made him consider what his future could be like if he shared it with someone else. For the first time, the idea of forever with the same person was not an alien concept he couldn"t wrap his head around.
The only problem was, John had to find her.
She hadn"t left her phone number, and a quick search online for her name turned up no listed number. He did, however, remember her mentioning the name of the place where she worked.
Phoenix was a h.e.l.l of a long way away, but not nearly as far as he was willing to go for a woman like Meghan. Besides, it was too d.a.m.n cold here, anyway.
John showered, packed a bag, and was on his way to the airport less than fifteen minutes later.
Madoc struggled with the images Tori had put in his head while Helen drove the four of them back to Dabyr. Drake was on the phone, speaking to Nicholas about rallying the Theronai. Apparently, Joseph was gone and unable to issue the order to have those who were out return.
It also meant that he couldn"t sentence Madoc yet.
Whatever. Madoc couldn"t do anything about that, and if he didn"t unscramble the thoughts Tori had put in his brain, it wouldn"t matter whether the men were ready to go into battle. They wouldn"t know where to go.
Nika sat in silence beside him in the back of the car, staring out the window at the sun as it rose overhead.
"I can"t imagine what it would be like to live without the sun, can you?" she asked him.
"The Sanguinar seem to be okay with it," said Madoc, hoping to distract Nika from worrying about her sister. Seeing the pain on her face broke his heart, and he wanted to do whatever it took to wipe it away.
Nika shifted in her seat, turning toward him. Her eyes matched the color of the sky behind her, and for a moment, Madoc forgot all about their job.
She was so pretty. So delicate. He had no idea how he"d gotten lucky enough to have her for his own, but he knew for certain that he would do whatever it took to keep her safe and make her happy for as long as she was his.
Once they found Tori, he"d convince Nika to stay at Dabyr with him. They"d keep each other company, make up for lost time, and find comfort in each other.
He only wished that he"d be free to go out and hunt down the creature who"d raped Tori and who knew how many other girls, and choke him to death on his own d.i.c.k.
As he allowed the notion of what she must have endured to enter his thoughts, rage pounded through him, making the confines of the car seem too small.
Nika"s hand fluttered to her throat, trembling as she touched the luceria. "I don"t know what you"re thinking over there," she said, "but I don"t like it."
Immediately Madoc squelched the thought and focused instead on the scenery pa.s.sing by them. "Sorry. I"ll be more careful."
He was going to have to learn to control himself better. He couldn"t allow the link he now had with Nika to upset her.
Madoc pulled in a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down. One thing at a time. First, he had to untangle the mess Tori had given him and make sense of it. That was step number one. After that would come finding Tori and facing his sentence.
Nika touched his hand. "You"re frustrated. Angry. Afraid. I"ve never seen you afraid before."
"I"ll get over it."
"Have you figured out where we"re going yet?" asked Drake from the front seat.
"I"m working on it."
"Work faster. Nicholas is calling everyone in, but they won"t stay long. You know how it is."
Madoc did. In addition to hunting and killing every Synestryn they could get their hands on, the men were also all searching for the women they knew were out there. Besides Toria"who was thought to be deada"there was at least one more female Theronai roaming the world. Jackie, daughter of Lucien, who"d fathered both Helen and Lexi.
It was a race to see who could find her first, and the only thing giving hope to his fellow Theronai.