She scanned the woods nearby, keeping watch for unwanted company. "Tynan said he will probably be able to tell if there"s any relation between the body this bone came from and our family."
Madoc climbed out of the hole and started filling it back in again. He was covered in dirt from head to toe, sweaty despite the cold wind, and cranky. He hadn"t done nearly enough killing or f.u.c.king tonight to suit him, making the pain behind his eyes throb and swell until it shoved its way down his throat and made it hard to breathe.
"I"m sure they"ll tell you whatever you want to hear if you let them have your blood," he said.
"I need their honesty."
Madoc snorted. "Good luck with that."
Dawn was only an hour or so away, and by the time it got here, Madoc needed to have them out of the cemetery before the human police came by and started asking questions. If he was lucky, he could drop Nika off at Dabyr and be plowing some wh.o.r.e before lunchtime. The white wig he paid his hookers to wear was in the back of his truck, ready to go.
"You believe me, don"t you?" she asked.
"Believe what?"
"That Tori is still alive."
"I believe you believe it. Course, you"re f.u.c.ked in the head, so what do you know?"
"She won"t let me in."
Madoc tossed another shovelful of dirt into the grave. "She won"t let you in where?"
"Her thoughts. She"s keeping me out even though I know she"s afraid." Nika looked up at him, her blue eyes bright with concern.
Something deep inside Madoc swelled as he watched her. It made him feel full and whole even as it threatened to make him burst apart. He had no idea what it was about her that did that, but it didn"t seem to go away.
He wished like h.e.l.l he could find a way to make it stop, that he could find a way to fix what was broken inside her so he could stop worrying about her.
He couldn"t do either, so he offered the only explanation that came to mind. "Maybe she doesn"t want to scare you."
Nika c.o.c.ked her head to the side and her white hair fell forward, caressing her cheek. The urge to reach out and slide it back behind her ear was nearly overwhelming. Madoc had to grip the shovel tight to keep his dirty hands where they belonged.
"I hadn"t thought about that. Maybe you"re right. I"m going to talk to her about it."
"How?" asked Madoc, but it was too late.
Nika lay down, and like a switch was flipped, she was gone. Her body went limp, her eyes rolled back into her head, and all the life slipped from her, leaving her looking fake and plastic, like a mannequin.
A surge of panic caught Madoc off guard, slamming into his gut until he couldn"t breathe. "Nika?"
She didn"t respond. She didn"t so much as twitch.
Madoc dropped the shovel and scrambled to get to her. He pressed his fingers to the side of her neck, frantic to feel a pulse. He left smudges of dirt on her pale skin, but beneath his index finger, he felt the beat of her heart, strong and steady.
Her chest lifted, shifting the leather of his jacket. She was breathing.
He pulled her into his arms and held her against his body, rocking her. He flung his thanks out into the universe, letting whoever was in charge hear it. He didn"t much believe in G.o.d, but if there was one, the fact that Nika was alive after all she"d been through was about as close to proof as he could imagine.
Her slender frame fit against his too well. The rise and fall of her breathing pressed her b.r.e.a.s.t.s against his chest. He shouldn"t have been able to feel them through the bulk of all her clothing, but he could. Just like he could feel the curve of her hip and the sleek length of her legs dangling over his thighs.
Her eyes fluttered open, so blue they nearly blinded him. So prettya"just like the skies he remembered from his childhood.
"She won"t let me in," whispered Nika. "I can"t talk to her. I"ll have to try again later."
"Don"t you ever do that to me again," he demanded. "You scared the h.e.l.l out of me."
Relief weighed Madoc down, pinning him there on the cold ground. He knew he should get up. He knew he should move away from her and put so much distance between them she wasn"t even in his sight.
She reached up and pressed her chilly hand against his cheek. "You"re cute when you"re scared."
"Cute?" No one had ever dared call him cute. At least, not to his face.
"Your forehead gets all scrunchy like one of those wrinkled puppies."
This conversation was headed to a bad place fast. "Clearly, it"s time to get moving."
"I like being out in the dark like this, alone with you. It"s peaceful. You always make me feel safe."
Madoc wasn"t touching that comment. Not even if his life depended on it. She had no idea just how unsafe she was at the momenta"how much he wanted to do things to her. His l.u.s.t for her mingled too closely with all the violent urges running through him. In some of his dreams, he"d f.u.c.ked her and made her cry out in pleasure, but in others, he"d pushed her down and forced her. Raped her. She"d begged him to stop and he hadn"t.
He had no business being anywhere near her. Already, his hands were tightening on her body like he didn"t want to let go. If he didn"t put some distance between them fast, he had no idea what he might do.
He asked, "Can you stand?"
"Sure. I"m fine."
"You"re not fine. You pa.s.sed out."
Nika climbed to her feet, holding the bone close to her chest so it wouldn"t fall. "No, I didn"t. I just slipped out of my body for a minute. I do it all the time."
"I don"t like it."
"You didn"t complain when I brought Cain back."
"What are you talking about?"
"After he was hurt. I went inside him and helped him find the way back. I helped him wake up."
Madoc had been there after it happened, but he hadn"t realized what she"d done. He wasn"t sure he wanted to know now. The idea of her being inside the mind of another man was just about more than he could stand. It made him feel territorial, when he knew he should be grateful to her for what she"d done. "We"re leaving."
"What about the rest of the dirt?"
"f.u.c.k the dirt."
She flinched as if his words hurt her.
"What?" he demanded.
Nika shook her head, making her hair sway. "Nothing. I have my bone. We can go. I need some money, though."
"What for?"
"Gas. The car"s almost empty."
A slow, deep anger simmered inside him as the implication of her words sank in. "Are you telling me that you drove out here all alone with no money to even fill the f.u.c.king tank?"
"I forgot."
"Forgot?"
Her chin went up and her stance widened and became defensive. "It"s not like I"m used to any of this. I had to learn to drive the hard way before I could leave. I was so worried I wouldn"t be able to do it, I forgot to bring money."
"Wait. What do you mean, the hard way?" he asked, even though he knew he probably wasn"t going to like the answer.
"I mean I had to borrow someone else"s mind for a while so I could learn. You know."
"No. I most definitely don"t know anything about borrowing someone else"s mind."
Nika turned away, striding toward the vehicles. "You"re not like me, Madoc. That doesn"t mean that I"m wrong, though. I get things done my own way. If you don"t like it, don"t watch."
Madoc caught up with her and, despite his better judgment, wrapped his fingers around her arm and pulled her to a stop. She was so delicate, all he"d have to do was tighten his fist and crush her bones, so he paid close attention to the pressure he exerted.
"You"re not driving back using borrowed knowledge of how to operate a car," he told her.
"Watch me."
She shouldn"t push him. He knew how close he was to the edgea"how fast he could lose control. But she didn"t know. She"d never seen one of his rages. She"d never seen what he could do when provoked. He"d been able to turn all that rage on the Synestryn, but right now, there were none to be found. He was out here alone with Nika with no one to witness a thing.
His fingers tightened around her arm. His blood was running hot. The dark side of him urged him to show her just how dangerous he could be. Maybe then she"d leave him alone.
A sharp jab to his chest startled him. She"d poked him with her finger and was scowling up at him. "Stop being a bully. I don"t like it."
"What makes you think I care what you like?"
"I know you. I"ve felt the thing growing inside you. It"s big and it"s ugly, but you"re stronger than it is. You"re a good man."
Madoc let out a humorless bark of laughter. He couldn"t help it. "I"m a lot of things, little girl, but there isn"t a single part left of me that"s good."
Nika grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down until he was at eye level with her. He let her do it. He knew better, but the closer she pulled him to her, the more willing he was to let her have her way. He"d let her scream at him all she liked; then he"d put her in his truck and take her home. As long as he didn"t give in to his urge to toss her to the cold ground and f.u.c.k her, she was relatively safe.
But Nika didn"t yell. Instead, before he could figure out what she was going to do, before he could stop her, she pressed her lips to his in a sweet, chaste kiss.
Desire flared to life, eclipsing everything else. He couldn"t remember the last time a woman had kissed hima"he always took his wh.o.r.es from behinda"but even if he could remember, those memories would have faded to meaninglessness inside this moment.
Nika"s mouth was soft and warm, her touch so brief and light, it was over before he"d even gotten a real taste of her.
He wanted more. The darkness inside him rose up, demanding more. She was sweetness and light and he wanted to consume her so that that sweetness was all his, forever.
He took her head in his hands, holding her still. He was going to give her a real kissa"one that staked a claim and showed her just what she"d gotten herself into. He"d warned her to stay away. Repeatedly. She hadn"t, and this was exactly what she deserved.
Her soft breath feathered out across his cheek. "I always wondered what that would be like. Thank you."
"For what?" he managed to grate out through his clenched jaw.
"My first kiss."
No. f.u.c.k no. He did not just hear that. "First?" It hadn"t even been a real kiss, just a peck.
He felt her try to nod, but his grip was too tight to let it happen.
First kiss. Too innocent. Too trusting. He had to let go of her. He couldn"t make her cry like he did in his nightmares.
It felt like he was stripping off his own skin, but he managed to move his hands away from the softness of her skin and hair. Smudges of mud from his hands dirtied her wherever they touched.
He stepped back, his chest billowing like he"d been running for days. His heart pounded hard against his ribs, and with every beat, the pressure in his head grew.
Nika reached for him. He took another long step back, evading her touch. If she touched him again, he"d lose control. The darkness would take him and Nika would pay the price.
He reached into his wallet, pulled out several bills, and tossed them on the ground at her feet. "Go," he told her. "Go home and don"t try to follow me."
"Where are you going?"
To find as many Synestryn or hookers as fast as he could. "None of your f.u.c.king business. Leave. I got the d.a.m.n bone for you. Don"t make me regret it."
She picked up the money, never taking her eyes from him. "You need me. One of these days I"ll be able to show you I"m not crazya"at least, not about that."
"Go. Now." Before he stopped her.
"I"ll wait for you at home. If you don"t come back so we can talk, I will come find you."
Her promise fell heavily on his shoulders as she turned and left.
Madoc waited until she was out of sight before he dared to move. The sun was nearly up, making the chances of finding any snarlies slim. He had the number of a wh.o.r.e in Omaha he"d used before. He only hoped he"d get to her before the pain ripped him apart.
Connal rushed to the meeting spot, ten minutes late. He"d already had to change the time, thanks to that paltry scratch on Nika"s hand. If he didn"t get there soon, he was afraid his food would no longer be waiting for him.
He pulled up to the vacant building and hurried to the door. It swung open easily, and the smell of filth a.s.saulted his nose. He allowed a trickle of power to aid his vision, forcing the darkness to dissipate.
This building was clearly a place where the homeless hid from the cold. Three stained, discarded mattresses lined one wall. A meager pile of belongings filled a rusted shopping cart. A battered metal drum held the remains of a fire left untended for too long.
On two of those three mattresses lay a human corpse. One was missing a leg. Another was still being fed on by small cat-sized Synestryn with barbed heads and spines. The wet sound of their feasting made Connal"s stomach turn.
Across the room, handcuffed to a metal pipe jutting from the wall, was the woman he"d been feeding from for months. In front of her was a trio of Synestryn guards.
Each of the guards was tall and spindlya"their shape disturbingly humanoid. Their skin was gray and looked slick, almost reptilian. Their mouths had no lips, only sharp rows of teeth left constantly visible. Saliva slid down their chins, adding to the shine of the skin along their too-long necks.
The guard in front blinked with odd, sideways eyelids, then stepped out of Connal"s way, indicating he could go to the woman to feed.