"Where is she now?"
"La.s.s! I dunnot know," said Mrs. Leigh, checking her sobs to communicate this addition to her distress. "Mrs. Lomax telled me she went--"
"Mrs. Lomax--what Mrs. Lomax?"
"Her as lives in Brabazon Street. She telled me my poor wench went to the workhouse fra there. I"ll not speak again the dead; but if her father would but ha" letten me--but he were one who had no notion--no, I"ll not say that; best say nought. He forgave her on his death-bed. I daresay I did na go th" right way to work."
"Will you hold the child for me one instant?" said Susan.
"Ay, if it will come to me. Childer used to be fond on me till I got the sad look on my face that scares them, I think."
But the little girl clung to Susan; so she carried it upstairs with her.
Mrs. Leigh sat by herself--how long she did not know.
Susan came down with a bundle of far-worn baby-clothes.
"You must listen to me a bit, and not think too much about what I"m going to tell you. Nanny is not my niece, nor any kin to me, that I know of. I used to go out working by the day. One night, as I came home, I thought some woman was following me; I turned to look. The woman, before I could see her face (for she turned it to one side), offered me something. I held out my arms by instinct; she dropped a bundle into them, with a bursting sob that went straight to my heart. It was a baby. I looked round again; but the woman was gone. She had run away as quick as lightning. There was a little packet of clothes--very few--and as if they were made out of its mother"s gowns, for they were large patterns to buy for a baby. I was always fond of babies; and I had not my wits about me, father says; for it was very cold, and when I"d seen as well as I could (for it was past ten) that there was no one in the street, I brought it in and warmed it. Father was very angry when he came, and said he"d take it to the workhouse the next morning, and flyted me sadly about it. But when morning came I could not bear to part with it; it had slept in my arms all night; and I"ve heard what workhouse bringing-up is.
So I told father I"d give up going out working and stay at home and keep school, if I might only keep the baby; and, after a while, he said if I earned enough for him to have his comforts, he"d let me; but he"s never taken to her. Now, don"t tremble so--I"ve but a little more to tell--and maybe I"m wrong in telling it; but I used to work next door to Mrs.
Lomax"s, in Brabazon Street, and the servants were all thick together; and I heard about Bessy (they called her) being sent away. I don"t know that ever I saw her; but the time would be about fitting to this child"s age, and I"ve sometimes fancied it was hers. And now, will you look at the little clothes that came with her--bless her!"
But Mrs. Leigh had fainted. The strange joy and shame, and gushing love for the little child, had overpowered her; it was some time before Susan could bring her round. There she was all trembling, sick with impatience to look at the little frocks. Among them was a slip of paper which Susan had forgotten to name, that had been pinned to the bundle. On it was scrawled in a round stiff hand--
"Call her Anne. She does not cry much, and takes a deal of notice. G.o.d bless you and forgive me."
The writing was no clue at all; the name "Anne," common though it was, seemed something to build upon. But Mrs. Leigh recognised one of the frocks instantly, as being made out of a part of a gown that she and her daughter had bought together in Rochdale.
She stood up, and stretched out her hands in the att.i.tude of blessing over Susan"s bent head.
"G.o.d bless you, and show you His mercy in your need, as you have shown it to this little child."
She took the little creature in her arms, and smoothed away her sad looks to a smile, and kissed it fondly, saying over and over again, "Nanny, Nanny, my little Nanny." At last the child was soothed, and looked in her face and smiled back again.
"It has her eyes," said she to Susan.
"I never saw her to the best of my knowledge. I think it must be hers by the frock. But where can she be?"
"G.o.d knows," said Mrs. Leigh; "I dare not think she"s dead. I"m sure she isn"t."
"No; she"s not dead. Every now and then a little packet is thrust in under our door, with, may be, two half-crowns in it; once it was half-a- sovereign. Altogether I"ve got seven-and-thirty shillings wrapped up for Nanny. I never touch it, but I"ve often thought the poor mother feels near to G.o.d when she brings this money. Father wanted to set the policeman to watch, but I said No; for I was afraid if she was watched she might not come, and it seemed such a holy thing to be checking her in, I could not find in my heart to do it."
"Oh, if we could but find her! I"d take her in my arms, and we"d just lie down and die together."
"Nay, don"t speak so!" said Susan, gently; "for all that"s come and gone, she may turn right at last. Mary Magdalen did, you know."
"Eh! but I were nearer right about thee than Will. He thought you would never look on him again if you knew about Lizzie. But thou"rt not a Pharisee."
"I"m sorry he thought I could be so hard," said Susan in a low voice, and colouring up. Then Mrs. Leigh was alarmed, and, in her motherly anxiety, she began to fear lest she had injured Will in Susan"s estimation.
"You see Will thinks so much of you--gold would not be good enough for you to walk on, in his eye. He said you"d never look at him as he was, let alone his being brother to my poor wench. He loves you so, it makes him think meanly on everything belonging to himself, as not fit to come near ye; but he"s a good lad, and a good son. Thou"lt be a happy woman if thou"lt have him, so don"t let my words go against him--don"t!"
But Susan hung her head, and made no answer. She had not known until now that Will thought so earnestly and seriously about her; and even now she felt afraid that Mrs. Leigh"s words promised her too much happiness, and that they could not be true. At any rate, the instinct of modesty made her shrink from saying anything which might seem like a confession of her own feelings to a third person. Accordingly she turned the conversation on the child.
"I am sure he could not help loving Nanny," said she. "There never was such a good little darling; don"t you think she"d win his heart if he knew she was his niece, and perhaps bring him to think kindly on his sister?"
"I dunnot know," said Mrs. Leigh, shaking her head. "He has a turn in his eye like his father, that makes me--He"s right down good though. But you see, I"ve never been a good one at managing folk; one severe look turns me sick, and then I say just the wrong thing, I"m so fluttered. Now I should like nothing better than to take Nancy home with me, but Tom knows nothing but that his sister is dead, and I"ve not the knack of speaking rightly to Will. I dare not do it, and that"s the truth. But you mun not think badly of Will. He"s so good hissel, that he can"t understand how any one can do wrong; and, above all, I"m sure he loves you dearly."
"I don"t think I could part with Nancy," said Susan, anxious to stop this revelation of Will"s attachment to herself. "He"ll come round to her soon; he can"t fail; and I"ll keep a sharp look-out after the poor mother, and try and catch her the next time she comes with her little parcels of money."
"Ay, la.s.s; we mun get hold of her; my Lizzie. I love thee dearly for thy kindness to her child: but, if thou canst catch her for me, I"ll pray for thee when I"m too near my death to speak words; and, while I live, I"ll serve thee next to her--she mun come first, thou know"st. G.o.d bless thee, la.s.s. My heart is lighter by a deal than it was when I comed in.
Them lads will be looking for me home, and I mun go, and leave this little sweet one" (kissing it). "If I can take courage, I"ll tell Will all that has come and gone between us two. He may come and see thee, mayn"t he?"
"Father will be very glad to see him, I"m sure," replied Susan. The way in which this was spoken satisfied Mrs. Leigh"s anxious heart that she had done Will no harm by what she had said; and, with many a kiss to the little one, and one more fervent tearful blessing on Susan, she went homewards.
CHAPTER III.
That night Mrs. Leigh stopped at home--that only night for many months.
Even Tom, the scholar, looked up from his books in amazement; but then he remembered that Will had not been well, and that his mother"s attention having been called to the circ.u.mstance, it was only natural she should stay to watch him. And no watching could be more tender, or more complete. Her loving eyes seemed never averted from his face--his grave, sad, careworn face. When Tom went to bed the mother left her seat, and going up to Will, where he sat looking at the fire, but not seeing it, she kissed his forehead, and said--"Will! lad, I"ve been to see Susan Palmer!"
She felt the start under her hand which was placed on his shoulder, but he was silent for a minute or two. Then he said,--
"What took you there, mother?"
"Why, my lad, it was likely I should wish to see one you cared for; I did not put myself forward. I put on my Sunday clothes, and tried to behave as yo"d ha" liked me. At least, I remember trying at first; but after, I forgot all."
She rather wished that he would question her as to what made her forget all. But he only said--
"How was she looking, mother?"
"Well, thou seest I never set eyes on her before; but she"s a good, gentle-looking creature; and I love her dearly, as I"ve reason to."
Will looked up with momentary surprise, for his mother was too shy to be usually taken with strangers. But, after all, it was naturally in this case, for who could look at Susan without loving her? So still he did not ask any questions, and his poor mother had to take courage, and try again to introduce the subject near to her heart. But how?
"Will!" said she (jerking it out in sudden despair of her own powers to lead to what she wanted to say), "I telled her all."
"Mother! you"ve ruined me," said he, standing up, and standing opposite to her with a stern white look of affright on his face.
"No! my own dear lad; dunnot look so scared; I have not ruined you!" she exclaimed, placing her two hands on his shoulders, and looking fondly into his face. "She"s not one to harden her heart against a mother"s sorrow. My own lad, she"s too good for that. She"s not one to judge and scorn the sinner. She"s too deep read in her New Testament for that.
Take courage, Will; and thou mayst, for I watched her well, though it is not for one woman to let out another"s secret. Sit thee down, lad, for thou look"st very white."
He sat down. His mother drew a stool towards him, and sat at his feet.
"Did you tell her about Lizzie, then?" asked he, hoa.r.s.e and low.
"I did; I telled her all! and she fell a-crying over my deep sorrow, and the poor wench"s sin. And then a light comed into her face, trembling and quivering with some new glad thought; and what dost thou think it was, Will, lad? Nay, I"ll not mis...o...b.. but that thy heart will give thanks as mine did, afore G.o.d and His angels, for her great goodness.
That little Nanny is not her niece, she"s our Lizzie"s own child, my little grandchild." She could no longer restrain her tears; and they fell hot and fast, but still she looked into his face.