"Parnell, love, I"ll do you right."
54.Now in the next days, Parnell had more life to him. Whether it was Zelde, or the grieving done, or just plain healing, he looked better and moved better and took no pills at all. They shared the big bed for sleep and loving both, and after the first time he needed no favors from her to save his strength. Not that she couldn"t offer or that he didn"t sometimes accept-that, Zelde thought, was part of the fun. But it was nice he didn"t need coddling.
She"d had a sore thigh herself for a couple of days- because right away, after the first time, Parnell had Fesler, the medic, give her a contraceptive implant. Well, she"d never liked the ways the Kids had to use to keep from catching a baby.
Since the Escape fighting, a lot of damage-repair work had been held up, waiting for Parnell"s inspection. Now he was in shape to move around-climb up and down ladders to look at things-and make his decisions. Zelde saw the change in how officers and ratings behaved to him. Before she hadn"t known just what was wrong.
Now she saw it- he was full boss again, and n.o.body talked a little bit to one side of him, the way they"d been doing. All right-she"d keep that in mind, signs of trouble to watch out for.
Changing course for Terranova, Parnell had had to guess, some. Good guessing, it turned out, but not right on the nose. He and Dopples made corrections; every few days they reviewed their sightings, fed the numbers into the computer with time- dilation adjustments that she still didn"t understand at all, and made small changes to the Drive program.
The computer bothered Zelde. She"d got to where she understood, pretty well, what went into it and what came out-but when it came to operating the thing she was still shaky. Parnell was willing to answer questions, but she wasn"t making enough sense out of the operating manual to know what to ask. So-keep trying, was all. . . .
One day Parnell came into quarters with a fresh scab on his cheek, where his tattoo was missing the top segment. At her look, he said, "Dopples and I have put our story together, to use when we reach Terranova. So I need the full Captain"s tattoo-and Dopps has his own upped from Second Hat to First."
55."Pretty sore, is it?" She stopped her finger short of touching him there.
"Not much. This woman down in the maintenance shops-Henty Monteil-turned out to be an expert."
Zelde thought. "How about the new Hats-Tzane and Mauragin? Do they get the marks, too?"
He shook his head. "No. Promoted in s.p.a.ce, the story goes." He scratched near the scab"s edge. "I"ll be glad when this stops itching."
These days she wasn"t with Parnell all the time on duty-he didn"t need it, and there was other work she had to learn. So until he called her to come to quarters, she didn"t know about the accident.
He was lying down with his clothes on; by the looks of him, if he hadn"t been taking the pain pills again, he should have.
"What happened?"
"Up on a ladder, pushing at a cable so the splicer could get a look at the bad section-n.o.body else seemed to know what to do. Something fell on my bad shoulder- knocked me off balance, and then I fell on it."
Oh, s.h.i.t! "Anybody look at it yet?" Headshake. "So let me." Gently she got his shirt loose, and off him. Double s.h.i.t!
The bruise, bad as it looked, didn"t worry her. Something, though-something inside-was torn loose, because under and around one scar the flesh swelled and blackened. It had to be blood seeping in there. And at the back-she didn"t know what stretched the skin, punching outward, but she knew it didn"t belong there.
Through her teeth, breath hissed.
"Bad, is it?" He might have been asking was it dinner-time yet.
"Not good. Parnell-that Fesler-you need him again."
"Then call him. And-he"s all right now. I think we can trust him."
"If you say so." She called on the intercom. In a few minutes Fesler, carrying his equipment kit, arrived.
When she let him in, he nodded. "Ms. M"tana. The captain"s hurt?" She gestured toward Parnell. Fesler moved over to the bed, set his kit down, and gently touched the 56.injured shoulder. "I"ll have to open it up again. Captain- for this, you"d better be out."
"Whatever you say. Go ahead."
Fesler injected an ampoule into Parnell"s neck; Zelde watched while the man"s eyes closed and his breath slowed. Now the medic took a spraycan and shot mist over all the injured part; he handed the can to Zelde. "Get my hands, thoroughly-then each instrument as I hold it up to you." She nodded, and carefully did as he told her. Over the protrusion, he slit the skin; metal showed. "Broke the pin loose. I"ll have to do the whole job over." What he said next, she barely heard: "But this time, I"ll do it right."
Until he was done-the wound bandaged and his own hands clean-Zelde thought a lot, but didn"t talk. Then she pulled the bedcover up to Parnell"s chin, and stood facing the medic. "You said something." He looked at her. "That this time you"d do it right."
She gripped her knife hilt. He said, "Out loud? I hadn"t realized." He didn"t look scared. "I was crazy mad-bitter. My best friend killed during Escape, and the only reason we both weren"t in on it was that n.o.body asked us. So we were caught on the wrong side-Jerry killed, and me once or twice d.a.m.ned near it. And the way I thought, just then, it was Parnell"s doing." He shrugged. "A couple of days later, I saw reason. Too late. I just had to hope my patch-Work job would hold up, because I didn"t dare tell anyone."
"You told me, just now. Why?"
"I didn"t know I did. Maybe I had to, was all."
"Why aren"t you scared? I"d be, in your shoes."
He shook his head. "If I"ve got it coming, I"ll get it. But now I have done the job right. It"s a bad break-multiple. He"ll always have trouble with that shoulder, I expect. But not by my doing-I swear it isn"t."
She moved back, out of his way, while he packed his kit and stood. As he walked past her, she said, "I"m not telling Parnell-that"s for you to do. But I"ll be on hand to hear it."
"Yes. That"s fair enough. Thank you." And he left It was three days before Zelde figured Parnell was in shape to decide things. Then, after Fesler changed the dressings, she nodded to the man and he told his story.
57.Parnell looked to Zelde. "You don"t seem surprised."
"He told me already."
"And what do you think?"
"That it"s up to you. He wouldn"t have had to tell, though."
Parnell smiled. "More to the point, apparently he did have to tell. All right, Fesler- the matter"s done with. Except for one thing." With his good arm, he gestured.
"The h.e.l.l of it, man, is that you would have been on the Escape team-we wanted you. But you were too close to Jerry Schadel, and neither Dopples nor Terihew trusted him. If we guessed wrong, I"m sorry-but you know the risks we were taking.
And I couldn"t overrule a majority in council."
"Jerry was safe as houses! But, I know-he did make noises, when Captain Czerner was around, as though UET was his mommy and daddy all put together. Well, he had to, you see-his brother was Welfared, and you know how they watch the family after that."
Fesler shrugged. "Well, it can"t be changed-not any of it, now. I guess I owe you thanks."
"We"re even." And when Fesler left, Parnell said, "Zelde? I"m surprised." She didn"t answer. "I mean, Fesler told you what he did-and you didn"t put a mark on him!"
"And not long back I"d of had a knife in him?" She grinned. "Maybe I"m learning a little." His laugh was easy, relaxed, so she said, "You feeling better, are you, Ragir?"
She saw him pause and consider; then he said, "Enough better, I think-if you don"t mind my being very, very lazy."
This time, Parnell recovered faster-and, if Zelde could judge by the way the pill bottle held up, with less pain. Certainly he got more movement in the shoulder. But from the way he moved sometimes, she thought the gut wound still bothered him.
During the first week he went back on duty, she stayed with him all through each watch. Then, as before, she branched out and worked with others.
The thin-faced, balding Dopples still puzzled her. She couldn"t get him to talk straight with her at all, and even trying to get answers from other people made her nervous if he was there. It wouldn"t have been so bad, except that he was First Hat, Parnell"s next-in-command.
58.One day after he"d cut her off cold-and d.a.m.n it, her question was in line of duty- she went off watch, headed for the galley, and found the new Second Hat, Lera Tzane, sitting alone at a table. Zelde stopped for a second, remembering what Parnell had said about the slim, quiet woman. "Lera"s capable, well trained. I wish she had more confidence, though-more sense of command." Maybe so, maybe not- Zelde got coffee and went to join her.
She was met with a smile. She said, "I swear, I don"t know what makes that Dopples tick!" Lera Tzane"s dark eyes widened, but she didn"t speak. "Won"t answer a simple question-you"d think words cost him money."
The woman"s hand smoothed the coil of hair-black, with the first streaks of gray- at the back of her head. She smiled. "You"re not the only one to have that problem.
Getting him to treat me like an officer instead of a rating is like pulling teeth. And Carlo"s having the same trouble." Carlo Mauragin, the new Third, was a young man in his bio-twenties; Zelde found him friendly enough, but not much help to her learning. He seemed to have a hard time handling his own new job. Zelde said so.
Now Tzane grinned; around her eyes, laugh wrinkles showed. "In Carlo"s old rating, he was bright enough to get by without any real study. He got lazy, and now it"s catching up to him. But I expect that he"ll make it." Over second cups of coffee they talked a little longer-but in the matter of Dopples, Lera Tzane had no advice to offer.
Asking Parnell, that was out. Somehow it would lose her the game-the game she had to play without knowing the rules. So she decided to ask Dopples himself.
To his face she"d never used the nickname-always it was "Mr. Adopolous." And when she knocked at his quarters, that"s what she called out.
Opening the door he wore no shirt. He was scarred nearly as much as Parnell was. He said, "What do you want?"
"To talk with you, sir."
He frowned, then said, "All right. Come on in." Two women-both blonde, looking like identical twins, and neither fully dressed-sat on the big bed. He said, "You two go take a bath or something," then turned back to Zelde. "What is it, M"tana?"
59.She waited until they were alone. "It"s-I"m trying to learn things-you know that.
So I can do more, and work at different jobs. Parnell wants that and so do I.
Everybody else, nearly, helps if they can. You, though-you don"t even answer what I need to know, to do the job I"m on." He said nothing. "At least you could say why."
He moved to the bed and sat, leaving her to stand. "You"re all alike, you women who make your way in bed. First you carry messages for your man. Then you start speaking for him, and pretty soon you think you own a share of his authority. And the men-nothing against the skipper, you understand-they"re flattered, and let you get away with it. Captain"s doxies! More trouble, they cause. . . ." Then he shook his head. "Not all-I shouldn"t say that. The woman he lost in Escape-she was different.
But she held Chief Navigator rating before she ever met Parnell. You-" He looked her up and down. "You"re a green kid-on your way in a hurry, I suppose you think.
Well, I"m watching you-so don"t get out of line."
He spread his hands. "Now I suppose you"ll tell the skipper on me. Well, go ahead- he knows what I think and how I feel. You won"t give old Dopples much trouble, M"tana."
"Wasn"t figuring to." Breathing fast, she heard her voice come more shrill than she liked. "If I wanted Parnell in on this, I"d of went to him. I didn"t. This is between us- Dopples."
His eyes narrowed. She said, "You just called yourself that. I never did, before."
"And don"t again. But did you mean it-that you"re not intending to run and hide behind Ragir Parnell?"
"Me? Don"t hide behind n.o.body. Never did, never had to. You know what the Kids are? Wild Children, the Uties call us. I made my first kill before I had my first period." Well, almost. . . .
"Into threats now, are we, M"tana?"
She caught her breath, shook her head. "Didn"t mean to, no. Trying to tell you, is all-what I do on duty is just me, not Captain"s woman. I can keep it straight-why can"t you?"
His brows lowered; under them his eyes glinted, looking up. "You make it sound good-maybe you even think it could work that way." She started to talk; he motioned si- 60.lence. "All right! I"ll give it a try. Any question pertaining directly to the job you"re doing, ask and I"ll answer. As long as you keep your place. I" ll do that. Start using any of your man"s authority, though-and I mean any-and captain or no captain. I chew your skinny a.s.s right there and then. Do you understand me?"
"Just fine; we got us a deal. One thing, though."
"Yes?"
"Pretty rough, you put it." She frowned. "You say you"ll watch me. Good enough- I"ll watch you, too."
He looked puzzled. "For what?"
"To see, maybe, if you ever stomp so hard with your mouth, on anybody you don"t have so d.a.m.ned much rank on. Sir."
She gave him plenty of time to answer, but he didn"t. So she turned away and left.
Parnell glanced up when she came in. "Zelde. I looked around for you, but no one knew where you were."
He hadn"t asked where she"d been, so she didn"t say. "Something I had to straighten out, was all."
"Anything 1 could help with?"
"No." She shook her head. "Thanks-but you got to stay out of it."
Now he frowned. "That sounds as though it might be serious."
She went to him and kissed him-pulled his shirt loose, and moved her fingers on him. "Don"t you mind, Ragir. You ever need to know, I" ll tell you. Now you don"t."
He smiled, and joined in her game. "I"ve ordered up a dinner I think you"ll like.
But it won"t be here for a while."
"That"s good. I"m not hungry yet, anyway."
But sometimes when he moved she felt him wince. It had to be the gut wound-and what could she do about that!
Dopples kept his word. He still didn"t like her-Zelde could tell that-but now he didn"t brush off her questions. All right, good enough. If she needed friends, there were other people around.
Like Turk Kestler. Coming off watch, Zelde met Turk. The woman looked a lot better in clothes than out of them, and the slight, growing bulk of hair over her head helped, too. Zelde said, "How"s your strawboss job going?"
61.Turk"s grin was the same; it still needed a few teeth. "Fine, Zelde. Oh, I had to stamp on some nids who thought they had a free ride coming, but it"s all working pretty good now. Hey-you"re moving up in the world, the way I hear it."
Zelde shook her head. "Not so much. I"m on apprentice rating in Control, is all.
Trying to learn navigation, communications-maybe how to pilot, someday." She saw Turk"s brows raise, and said, "One part, you could have heard wrong. Living with Parnell-that makes me no rank, Turk."
"If you say so; I"d have thought different." Then: "Hey-you want to come see something?"
"What is it?"
"I"d rather show you." Well, why not? So Zelde followed her friend downship, along past Drive, to a maintenance shop where a small, older woman worked at a bench. "Henty Monteil, Zelde."
The two shook hands. Zelde said, "I heard of you. Yeah-you"re the one tattooed Parnell . . . and Dopples. Right?"
"Yes. If you feel like being decorated, come around." Zelde shook her head. "All right. Ready for the fitting, Turk?"
"Yes, I think so." Kestler fumbled at her left earlobe, taking out what first looked like a b.u.t.ton earring. But the post was thick, nearly three millimeters. A moment later, Turk unplugged the other lobe.