Lost In Character: Transmigration Chronicles Of A Nameless Heroine

His face looking grim, Leal nodded. "That would mean it"s Baron Harmin in there."

Hilde breathed a secret sigh of relief that it wasn"t the Lord Viscount. The very next moment, though, she felt guilty for it. It did not make the situation any better just because it wasn"t the man she was closer to who was in immediate danger. Certainly, to Leal, there was no difference at all.

Now she felt a strong need to apologize again -- for her own slips, for her people"s various hostile behaviors -- but she recalled that this all happened because the Lyseans have come when they shouldn"t have. She then felt equal parts angry at them for the problems they"d caused and ashamed that she"s blaming them when Arnicans were clearly very much at fault too.

She was spiralling again, and she knew it. With conscious effort, she closed her eyes and began inhaling slowly.

"Stop, Hilde," she told herself. Her inner voice sounded like her, but as she began to pay more attention to her breathing to calm her raging thoughts and emotions, she recognized the influence of her past ident.i.ty in the way she actively speaks to herself. "That"s right, breathe. All of it"s already happened; it"s done. Just deal with the present. "Now" is what you can still influence."

Hilde opened her eyes to a largely unchanged scene. Leal had also fallen deep in thought. His resolve to let the situation stand regardless of which group was being mobbed -- of refraining from acting until those who could still reach safety had done so -- was clearly under fire.

Now unruffled and in full possession of herself, Hilde asked the soldier, "Do you think your comrades are in danger of being overwhelmed? How bad are the attacks?"

With a last look at the Prince, the older female shook her head and answered, "The situation on the ground is being contained by the palace guards, Princess, more or less. But there"s this stubborn group of around a dozen men, and they"d been using the roofs and adjacent buildings to try entering through the upper floors. Most windows seem well boarded from the inside -- the few that were breached are well defended. The..."

She hesitated, swallowing before training her eyes full of worry first towards Hilde, then towards Leal, who"d begun listening in at some point. Finally, she looked to the ground.

"Please continue," said Hilde in a gentle but firm tone.

The soldier swallowed again. "The only real danger is that the building might be torched." At this, despite her self-enforced calmness, Hilde"s heart slammed against her ribcage. "No soldier has drawn their sword yet, Princess, not even my fellows. I think that has helped keep the aggression minimal. Still..."

She was once again unable to continue, but Hilde could guess what she might be getting at.

"If someone gets it into his head to set fire to the place -- to lure them out or to kill them outright..."

Now, she too was put in a difficult spot. A part of her was proud in an admiring way that the women were defending well without using deadly force. She didn"t even know if that was still her order being followed or if someone else had given the same one. If things were to escalate...

Her first choice would always be to not let the blood of their citizens spill, but at what cost?

For the moment, she was freed from having to decide because Leal had made his own choice first.

"We shall await word that Viscount Renard is safe."

The soldier barely managed to hold in her protest. Her worry was for her comrades, and it was likely that she couldn"t care less about the Lyseans in their charge. After all, the Viscount"s status was unknown -- there was half a chance he was alright. On the other hand, it was certain that the Baron and those with him were in danger. Why risk the latter even more, and her fellows with him?

Before her confusion could morph into contempt, Leal went on, "Please continue to observe the situation -- from higher ground, if you can, but try to stay close by. As soon as things take the slightest turn for the worst, alert us." He paused in order to put weight on his next words. "Use your own judgment again in this. Call us in when you think there"s no other choice."

The soldier nodded solemnly and wasted no time setting to her task.

"I did not get to ask for her permission," Hilde said under her breath. She touched the lower part of her borrowed armor absently as she watched the soldier"s figure diminis.h.i.+ng towards the long alley"s well-lit end.
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"I did not get to ask for her name," Leal echoed, rectifying that at once by turning to his remaining escorts to ask for all of theirs.

Under the steel covering it, Hilde"s stomach clenched and contracted in the oddest manner. She glanced down at it with a frown and thought, "I must be monstrously hungry again."

They were doomed to once again do nothing but wait. This time, there was no relaxing for any of them. One way or another, things would soon come to a head.

However, while even the youngest among the Prince"s Guards seem experienced with this kind of sustained, high-tension state, Leal was neither a soldier nor an ordinary man.

Sitting opposite him, Hilde drew her knees against her chest and hugged them. She then said, "Won"t you continue what you were telling before?"

Everyone else who"d heard her raised their brows; she saw from the corner of her eyes how dubiously they were glancing at her.

"Right now, Princess?" asked Leal, voicing what the others thought.

Although she couldn"t distinguish the color of his complexion, his features had been looking painfully tense since the female soldier left.

In those moments, for the first time, it fully sank in with her that the foreign prince and his lords had been thrown into a place whose landscape they were unfamiliar with. But while the older men might have the advantage of age and experience, this was likely the first time Leal was dealing with something of this scale. He was also doing his level best to navigate the unforeseen twists and turns, but in the end, he also wasn"t certain of his every action and decision. He also didn"t have all the answers.

"Come to think of it, I don"t believe anyone does."

She put on a slightly sheepish smile, allowing tension to show in her eyes as well before answering, "Do excuse me, I"m in need of a little distraction."

That seemed to get through to Leal. Some of the knots in his forehead began to ease.

"I see..." he said with a distracted nod. "So it"s that..."

While he collected himself and perhaps rearranged his thoughts, Hilde"s expression also eased into a more relaxed and natural state.

"Not really..." she thought, settling down to actually pay attention to what he might impart. "Or rather, not just me -- it isn"t just me who needs distracting."