aW-well, good. Then itas settled. Theyall be in Friday night and leave Sunday. Sat.u.r.day, Iam having the barbecue. Stop by in the afternoon. Anytime after two or so.a aOkay. Iall be there. Thanks.a *******
Toni saw Nick and Alana as she walked up the driveway. She thanked G.o.d, Nick looked as nervous as she did. Then Alana whispered something in his ear and kissed his cheek. Alana then gave him a gentle nudge, and he met Toni halfway.
aHi, Toni. Itas good to see you again.a He stuck out his hand.
Toni smiled as she took the offered hand. aYou look well, Nick. Howave you been?a She let out a deep relieved breath the same time Nick did. Both chuckled quietly.
aIam so sorry,a he said, still holding her hand.
aItas okay. I know how you felt. Sheas your mother, and youare a good son.a aThanks, but I shouldnat have done that. Let me get you a beer,a he offered with a grin. Toni nodded her thanks.
Alana walked up to Toni and stood on tiptoes to kiss her cheek. aOkay?a Toni nodded and held out her shaking hand to Alana. aI was as nervous as a cat.a aThank you.a Alana looked up and smiled.
Toni sported a confused look. aFor what?a aNothing, everything.a Alana c.o.c.ked her head and smiled. aYou mean a great deal to me. Youare kind and considerate. You know how much my children mean to me and you want them to accept you. Thank you.a For a moment, they just looked at each other. aAlana. Youaa aHere ya go!a Nick announced.
Alana grabbed Toni by the arm. aWhat? I what?a aMom, you keeping Guinness stocked in the fridge?a Nick asked with a raised eyebrow and handed Toni the black beer. ah.e.l.l, I forgot to get me one.a Toni took it and offered a slight smirk to Alana. aStocking my favorite beverage? Why thank you,a she whispered.
Alana tried to ignore the playful flirtation and looked to the heavens. She glanced at Toni and laughed. aKnock it off, OaHara.a aToni!a Jocelynas voice called out.
aAnd I want you to finish that statement later,a Alana insisted.
Toni laughed and turned to Jocelyn. aMy G.o.d, itas been four months. You look, well, you look twenty-one.a Toni reached in her jacket pocket and handed her a small gift-wrapped box.
aFor me?a Jocelyn asked.
aHappy birthday,a Toni said.
While Jocelyn tore open the small box, Toni knew Alana watched her with Jocelyn. She glanced and saw the happy smile, and Toni almost let out a deep contented sigh like a schoolgirl. She looked at Alana, who wiped tiny beads of perspiration from her forehead. She looked flushed.
aAre you having hot flashes?a Toni whispered. Alana tried not to grin as she glared.
aHair combs,a Jocelyn said. aToni, theyare beautiful. What design is this?a aCeltic. Itas a never-ending circle. I, well, your mother gave me the idea. She says youare always pulling your hair back and could never find something strong enough for your thick hair. I saw them in this shop on Belmont, and I just thought of you. You have thick hair like your motheras,a she said with a shrug.
Jocelyn had tears in her eyes. Nick watched and smiled as he drank his beer. aYouare just like Mom. So emotional.a Alanaas eyes grew misty, as well. It was then Toni realized just how emotional the last couple of months had been for Alana, her children, and for Paul. So much had happened in such a short time, she thought.
aThank you, Toni. Iam so glad Mom has you,a she blurted out and flung herself at Toni, who was stunned. She wrapped her arms around Tonias waist and held on, sobbing.
Nick rolled his eyes. aWomen,a he said and headed for the cooler.
Alana watched the tender display and wiped the tears away as she lightly slapped Nick in the back of the head as he walked by.
Toni hesitated for an instant, then wrapped her arms in a tender embrace around Jocelynas shoulders. aYouare welcome,a she said tenderly. aNow enough crying. If you get your mother going, Nick and I will have to leave.a Nick laughed, watching Jocelyn as she sniffed and pulled back. She reached up and kissed Tonias cheek.
aIam going to fix my hair,a she announced and ran into the house.
aYou amaze me, OaHara.a Toni searched Alanaas face. aI do?a aYep. Camon, you need a refill.a Nick manned the grill. Toni sat nearby, talking to Jocelyn about school. Alana escaped to the kitchen.
aSo whaddaya think about Mom busting up her hand?a Nick asked proudly.
aShe didnat really tell me how it happened,a Toni said honestly as she took a handful of peanuts.
Both siblings exchanged glances.
aShe didnat?a Jocelyn looked into the kitchen. They could hear Alana humming as she prepared the steaks.
Toni looked at both children, who looked decidedly guilty. aOkay, you two, what gives? I donat know you all that well, but you both look guilty. Now whatas going on?a Jocelyn leaned in and took a drink of beer. Nick shrugged. aYou have a right to know, but you canat tell Mom.a Toni shook her head vehemently. aNope, nope, nope. I learned at Christmas to never ever lie to your mother. She scared the h.e.l.l out of me.a She looked at the giggling young adults. aIam serious.a aSheall get mad butaokay. Dad has his company, and before the divorce, Momas lawyer was going to ask for half,a Jocelyn started.
aSeems natural,a Toni offered as she ate the peanuts.
aRight, but Dad, well, he...a Nick continued for his floundering sister. aHe and Mom had already agreed on a settlement. But then Dadas lawyer spoke up and accused you and Mom of what I accused you of in your officea a Toni nearly choked on her peanut. She coughed and leaned forward and tried to catch her breath. aWhat is it with this family? I swear youare all trying to kill me.a She felt Nick slam her on the back. She spit up the wayward peanut and took a deep breath.
aWhy didnat she tell me that?a Toni hissed angrily.
Nick and Jocelyn pushed her back into the lawn chair.
aGeez! Keep it down, will ya? Sheall kill all of us,a he said nervously.
Jocelyn gently put her hand on Tonias arm. aI know my mother very well.a She stopped and laughed. aWell, not well enough apparently.a aWhat do you mean?a Toni suddenly felt uncomfortable, like she was on the witness stand.
aToni, look at it from Momas point of view. She didnat want any money. It was never a consideration. We talked about it. Nick and I are in his will, and Mom just didnat give a d.a.m.n.a aMom was always more about the feelings than the material. Itas the artist in her,a Nick said.
Toni noted the pride in his voice. He was right about Alana. She was a good woman with a good soul. Thatas what she loved about her. G.o.d, she said it. She loved her. She looked at the two adults wondering if they had any clue. h.e.l.l, she wondered if Alana had any clue.
aToni, donat be angry with her. She...she cares for you, and she wouldnat stand for Dadas lawyer threatening you overaa Jocelyn chuckled quietly. aWell, not for anything. So she got so angry with him, she slammed her hand on the table and nearly broke it. Her hand, not the table,a Jocelyn said dryly.
Toni chuckled at how much she sounded like her mother.
aSo thatas why she didnat call me for almost a month. Didnat return my messages.a Toni sighed and shook her head.
aShe was protecting us and you. She was protecting the people she loves,a Jocelyn finished in a soft voice.
For a long moment, she locked gazes with Jocelyn. Toni was overwhelmed and couldnat speak.
Nick chuckled quietly as he opened the cooler. aSo Mom stuck up for you,a he said, sounding so much older.
Toni looked away from Jocelyn and took the offered beer. For an instant, Nick did not let it go. Toni now searched Nickas hazel eyes, finding a good deal of maturity in them.
aI love my mother.a He looked at Jocelyn who smiled. aThe question is, do you?a Toni looked from sister to brother. aLook, kids. Your mom and Iaa She had absolutely no idea what to say next.
aAll Iam saying is youad better, as well.a Toni blinked as her heart pounded in her ears. Nick then grinned, and Toni started breathing again. aOr youall kick my a.s.s?a aOr Iall kick your a.s.s.a He held his bottle of beer near hers. aRight?a Toni nodded and lightly touched the bottle with her own. aRight.a Jocelyn, not wanting to be left out, reached her bottle in, as well.
aThe Three Musketeers!a she announced with a laugh.
aYou look more like the Three Stooges,a Alana called out.
After a wonderful afternoon, Allie walked Toni down the driveway.
aThanks, Alana. I had a great time.a Allie stopped by Tonias car and folded her arms across her chest. aYouare always welcome in my home.a Both women were silent for a moment. aJocelyn and Nick really like you,a Allie said.
Toni turned to her and smiled slightly. aThatas good because Iam fond of them, as well.a She leaned against her car. aIam a likable person,a she finished lightly.
Allie let out a genuine laugh and leaned against the car, as well.
aDo you like me?a Toni asked.
aYes,a she said quietly. aI do.a She looked down at her shoes, feeling the heat spread across her face. She was grateful for the moonlit night.
aAlana,a Toni started, then stopped. She absently kicked at the pavement. aThe other day, in the bathroomaa Allie felt her body tremble at the thought. aYes?a aI-Iam not sorry I nearly kissed you. I wanted to. I thought maybe you wanted to kiss me, as well. Thatas what I was going to say when I first got here.a aI donat know what Iam feeling. This is so foreign to me. I havenat thought of anything like this for so long.a aIall leave it alone if thatas what you want. Nothing is worth losing your friendship. I donat want anything to happen to that.a Allie looked up now. aNeither do I.a She took a deep breath. aI donat know what to think.a Toni nodded and reached over and pulled her into a warm hug. aI understand. Youave been through a tremendous amount of stress in the last few months. I wonat add to it. Now thanks for the day. Iall call you during the week. Good night,a she whispered and kissed the top of her head, then let her go.
Allie wrapped her arms around her waist and held on for a moment, surprised at the wave of contentment that swept through her as Tonias warm arms tightened around her shoulders. As Allie breathed in the subtle fragrance of Tonias perfume, she realized she had let out a deep sigh. Contentment gave way to inexplicable emptiness when Toni stepped back.
Confused by her feelings, Allie smiled slightly and stepped back, as well. aGood night, Toni. Drive safe. Iaa She stopped herself. She wanted to say, aI love you,a as she had before, but now, it quite possibly meant something altogether different, something more, and she didnat know what to do about it.
Toni sported a lopsided grin. aI do, too.a She gently touched her soft cheek, then quickly got into her car and drove away, giving the horn a short honk as she waved out the window.
Allie chuckled and waved back until the car was out of sight. The empty feeling lingered as she walked up the driveway.
Chapter 22.
aTracy and Hepburn or Bogey and Bacall?a Alana asked as the batter struck out. She pulled her big jacket around her.
Toni contemplated as she sucked on a peanut sh.e.l.l. aTracy and Hepburn,a she said with a definite nod. She looked over at Alana, huddled in her big down jacket. It was opening day at Wrigley Field. Toni got the tickets from her lieutenant friend and could think of no one else to invite but the schoolmarm.
aHmm. Okay, Tracy and Hepburn or Gable and Lombard?a Alana gave Toni a smug grin. aArenat you freezing?a she asked, then grimaced as the wet peanut sh.e.l.l found its way to the ground.
aNope. I have thick blood. And Gable and Lombard never made a movie together. Canat use them.a Toni returned the grin.
Alana stuck her tongue out.
aDonat do that unless youare gonna use it,a she said with a sly grin. Alana immediately sucked the tongue back in its home with a furious blush.
aChicken,a Toni whispered into her beer.
aYou child.a Allie grabbed a peanut.
Behind them, the same man shook his head and leaned in. aArenat you the same women who were talking about your weight last summer? Canat you just watch the game?a Toni turned in her seat. aYou have a good memory, pal.a She motioned for him to come closer. aStay tuned. Weare going to talk about menstruating and menopause in a minute.a The guy quickly sat back and drank his beer. Toni laughed when she saw the stern look from Alana. aWhat?a aThis was nice of you, Toni. Iave never been to opening day.a Allie sighed happily and shivered.
Toni took the blanket and spread it across Alanaas knees. aYouare welcome. Iall be right back,a she said and scooted out of her seat.
She ran up to the vendor and returned to see Alana shivering. aHere, youare freezing and youare making me cold just looking at you.a Toni handed her the huge cup of hot chocolate.
aAhh, thanks. Hey, you remembered the tiny marshmallows,a she exclaimed, and they heard the man grunt behind them.
aWell, at least they won,a Alana said with a shiver. aI hope the heat in your car works. Where to?a Toni slid in and turned on the heat. aMy place if you donat mind. You never made dinner for me the last time you were there. You were a bit um, preoccupied.a aBut you took care of me.a Alana looked out the window.
Toni said nothing as she drove. Yes, she thought, and shead been fighting the love shead felt for Alana ever since. When she woke up the next morning to find Alana in her bed, she was as content, albeit shocked, and happy as she had ever been in her life. She knew Alana just needed to be close to someone at the time, and Toni could not deny her the comfort. She never expected to fall in love.
aToni?a Alana was saying.
aOh, sorryawhat?a aI asked what you wanted for dinner. What do you have in your house? Iam afraid to ask.a aHey. I went shopping yesterday, and my refrigerator is full, so donat get sa.s.sy, schoolmarm,a Toni said with a grin.
aYou went food shopping? So you a.s.sumed Iad make dinner for you, huh?a Alana asked with a playful glare.
aNo, I only hoped,a Toni said honestly as she stole a glance at Alanaas blushing face.
aToni OaHara, you have a way of catching me off-guard with your sincere comments. Itas lucky for you I like to cook,a she said as Toni pulled into her driveway.
aItas truly my lucky day.a aG.o.d, Iam freezing. Itas April and I bet we get snow. We were just barbecuing, werenat we?a Toni listened to Alana, who seemed nervous, hence her rambling. Toni remembered the last and only time Alana was in this apartment. She had just seen her ex-husband in an intimate exchange with the woman he was probably now going to marry. Toni did take care of Alana that night. Though Alana really didnat remember crawling into Tonias bed, she wondered if Alana had thought about it. When she woke, did her body tingle the way Tonias did? She hoped so.
aGood grief, woman, quit yakking. I have the fireplace going. Iall make coffee. If youad get in the kitchen and start cooking, youad warm up,a Toni said with a playful grin.
Dinner was heavenly. Roasted chicken and mashed potatoes, asparagus, and hollandaise. Toni purred like the well-fed cat she was as she stretched out in front of the fireplace.
aI cannot believe how good that was.a Toni sighed, and she turned on her side and looked at the chef. Alana drank her coffee and seemed lost in her thoughts. aWhatcha thinking about?a Alana grinned. aTwo things. First, everything that happened in the past few months. How my life is completely changedaa aFor the better,a Toni interjected.
aYes, definitely for the better. Iam completely content that the divorce didnat affect Jocelyn and Nick. I just thank G.o.d theyare grown up with their own lives. It would kill me if anything ever happened to them.a Her voice was low as she contemplated the possibility.
aBut nothing happened to them. You and Paul handled the whole thing with grace. I admire you for that. Iam sorry your marriage didnat work out, but you have so much life ahead of you,a Toni said earnestly as she propped her head up on her hand. aNow whatas the second thing?a Alana blushed deeply, which intrigued Toni. aIam not sure I should say.a Toni snorted. aOh, now you have to. You know I wonat let this go. Now give.a aI was thinking about the night Iaa aCrawled into my bed?a Alana buried her face in her hands. Toni laughed at the m.u.f.fled cry. aYes.a aAndaa Alana took her hands away. aAnd while I may not have remembered getting into your bed, I remember feeling very warm and contented.a aThatas good. I admit it was a shocker but a very pleasant shock. Very pleasant.a Alana sighed and chuckled, running her fingers through her hair. aIawhat do you want to do? I mean after the fire department? There is life after that, isnat there?a aOdd segue, but Iall bite.a Toni watched Alana blush once again. aThis is going to sound stupid. Remember when I said I used to go to the coffee shops when I was a kid?a Alana nodded and continued listening.
aWell, I thought maybe Iad have one and theread be someplace for teenagers to go without heading to the streets. Maybe theyad find safety and peace, even if itas just for an hour or soaa She shrugged again, glancing at Alana to gauge her reaction. aItas dumb, I know.a aI donat think itas stupid at all. I think itas a wonderful idea,a Alana said in earnest.
aYeah? IaveaI have an idea of the place, but Iam just waiting for the right time. I have a few years left to work,a Toni said, suddenly enthusiastic. She then sat back and grinned. aIam glad you agree.a Toni then c.o.c.ked her head. aWhat about you? Are you going to continue to teach?a aI suppose. I enjoy it, though Iad like to paint more. I miss it, and lately, Iave just had the itch to start again anda"a Toni laughed openly and stood. She offered Alana her hand, which she took with a wary look and allowed Toni to lead her to the front door. They walked down the small hall to an adjacent door.
aWhat are you doing?a aKeep still and wait.a Toni fished the key out of her pocket. She opened the door and flipped on the light.
Alana walked in with a tentative air. It was a large studio situated behind Tonias apartment. She watched Alana as she gazed at the hardwood floors and floor-to-ceiling windows on the south and west side. It looked enormous only because of the landscaping windows.
aWow, what a view,a Alana said. aAnd another deck outside.a aI know. Thatas why I bought it. I didnat know what to do with it. I thought storage, but itas too nice just to store my junk. I had no idea what to do until I thought of you.a aMe? What are you talking about?a Alana asked completely confused.
Toni felt like a kid on Christmas morning. aAn art studio,a she announced happily. She walked into the room and turned around in a circle. aCanat you just see yourself painting away in this?a Alana looked stupefied. She slowly walked into the room. aAn art studio? I canat. This is yours. No.a aYes.a Tonias crooked grin spread across her face.
aToni, no,a Alana insisted as she looked around.
aAlana, yes.a aNo.a When Alana grinned, then shook her head, then smiled again, Toni knew Alana struggled with the idea.
aIf it makes you feel better, you can rent it. Iall charge you a buck.a aIa"a aTell me you canat see yourself in this room. Wait until you see the sunlight that streams in here during the day and the sunset at night. Geez, itas begging for an artist.a Toni nearly pleaded, and Alana laughed nervously. aYou donat have to make a decision now. Itas yours if you want. No pressure.a Alan walked away from her and stood by the huge windows. She looked around at the city below and the lake off in the distance. Toni quietly followed her and stood behind her.