Because he had successfully proposed to me, Raffles had become confident and courageous, able to act decisively in everything he did instead of cowering anxiously. However, now because of me, his situation didn"t seem too good.
I pinned Raffles down. His blush didn"t fade, his flickering eyes didn"t dare to look at me. This was the Raffles I was familiar with.
“Raffles, I"m sorry. I know that you gave up your experiments because of me. I also know that science is your life. If it was me who confused you, I"d rather you go ahead with the experiments. I don"t want to see you like this.”
I was really worried about him. He had been talking to himself every night. Although he had done that in the past too, he would still go to bed. The worst case scenario was that he would sleep with his eyes open. As of now, his behavior was extremely unusual.
“Sor-, sorry, I made you worried.” Raffles was just like before. He only knew to apologize to me.
“Raffles! Look at me!” I roared at him.
However, he kept avoiding meeting my eyes.
I gripped his chin and forced him to look at me. The very moment his gaze met mine, he immediately looked away.
“Raffles.” I was upset to see him behaving like this. We were all family and we liked each other. I didn"t want to see him like this.
He had his dream and he had his ambition. If he were to give it up for me and put himself in misery, it would be my fault. I was being selfish.
I slowly leaned closer to his face yet he still avoided my gaze. “What should I do to make you happy again? Does this work?” I leaned in and kissed him on his lips gently.
His body instantly stiffened. His lips quivered under mine. At once he looked at me, surprise in his trembling gaze. He was happy. This was what scientists called endorphin. He stared at me, thrilled with happiness.
The kiss that he"d planted on the day I left Noah City, he had mustered courage to do it. I could clearly remember that his lips had been s.h.i.+vering nervously when he"d kissed me then.
That"s why, that was the true Raffles.
I left his lips and looked at him. “This is you. Who was that just now?”
His eyes immediately shot open. His happiness and excitement earlier immediately vanished and was replaced with anxiety and panic. He shoved me away by my shoulders!
Raffles shoved me off.
“I, I"ve been confused recently.” Raffles began to stutter as he spoke. He was panicking. In terms of IQ, he absolutely surpa.s.sed us by countless folds. However, in terms of EQ, he could never cover or hide his expression. “I am afraid that you will hate me. I am afraid that I can"t be with you. Harry is so outstanding. You and him…” His voice grew sad, “...fell in love with each other. I began to feel like I am a third wheel...”
It turned out that it was because of the relations.h.i.+p between Harry and me. Harry"s impending return made Raffles feel threatened, resulting in him losing his confidence to stay by my side.
I immediately hugged him. “Raffles, don"t think like that. I am working hard for this. Can you work hard for this as well? You can"t give up.”
“Lil Bing.” He became emotional again. He held me tightly in his arms, his chest heaving up and down against mine.
“I don"t know how to make you feel at ease. If, if you have to do that, do that…” I blushed. “...with me and it will make you feel better, I, I, I can…”
“Lil Bing!” He exclaimed in shock. At that very moment, I felt something below begin to rise.
My face instantly blushed because I was sitting on Raffles, so it felt rather distinct.
“Lil Bing!”
*Bang!*
Raffles shoved me off him.
“Ah!” I fell and sat on the floor. It felt just like the countless timed Xing Chuan had tried to rape me and I"d shoved him off.
“Lil Bing!” Raffles blushed and came before me anxiously. He held my arm. “I"m sorry. I"m sorry. I, I…”
“Stop talking.” I blushed and hugged my knees.
“I, I don"t want to force you. But hearing you say that...” Raffles smiled bashfully and hugged me, his burning face leaning into my neck. “...I am happy. I am too sensitive, which is my own issue. Because my brain is too active. I won"t do it again.”
“Mm.” I felt relieved. “Raffles, as long as you don"t give up, I would never give you up!”
We stayed in each other"s embrace under the sunlight. When Raffles and I were together, it wasn"t as exciting or bright like sunflowers, like the love I felt with Harry.
His care, his gentleness, his compromise, instead made me feel a different kind of love and warmth. Maybe, this was a different kind of love?
There were various kinds of love. I didn"t want to leave him nor did he want to leave me. I didn"t want him to be sad nor did he want me to be sad, to the point he"d rather give up his dream. Could this not be love?
When Harry returned, the three of us would definitely be together happily, just like every other fairy tale.
Since then, Raffles returned to normal and I was always with him. Harry gave me a sense of security, but I realized that I gave Raffles a sense of security, like how I gave Xing Chuan a sense of security.
It was the first time I felt that a woman could give a man a sense of security. It was strange.
The frontline sent an update. Harry, He Lei and Xing Chuan had taken down the important cities on the three war routes. They would be back in no time for reorganization and celebration!
Harry is coming back!
I wondered if He Lei and Captain Chaksu would be back too.
The entire Silver Moon City was thrilled with excitement. The girls weren"t in the mood to attend cla.s.ses. Their lovers were coming back.
Raffles and I lay on our beds. Raffles was scribbling on his notebook, drawing a draft. It was my new outfit.
Because…
I told him that I was growing and my original outfit made me feel suffocated.
He understood and blushed.
Only when Raffles was there, would I dare to release my b.o.o.bs and let my constrained b.o.o.bs relax.
I lay on the bed and watched Raffles. He looked the most serious and the most handsome when he worked.
“Raffles, go to bed. Harry is coming back tomorrow.”
He continued to draw and smiled at me. “You go to bed first.” Then, he began drawing again.
But I couldn"t sleep because Harry was coming back the next day. My heart was racing the entire time.
I got up and Raffles gave me a confused look. I smiled at him. “Let me paint you.”
Raffles was dumbfounded. I pulled him along towards the drawing room, where I made him sit on the floor. “Just do your own thing.”