Volume 4, Chapter 70: Why are you such an expert
TL: flarewk
"Zhang Jian! Let"s have lunch together!"
"Mm, a luncheon huh, I have the same thinking as well."
"Same thinking as well? I somehow feel that today, you gave off a sort of.......formally polite kind of sensation..."
Due to that name-calling early in the morning, Ma Qing Xue was delighted until she over-lapsed many of my abnormal behavior, and Yè Zǐ being a person from ancient times, wanting her to say out modern-day language within a short period of time was still rather difficult, but luckily I normally wouldn"t speak my hometown"s dialect in front of them, if not Yè Zǐ would have a harder time acting.
"Don"t tell me that you didn"t like my this look of being rather knowledgeable?"
Yè Zǐ confusedly looked towards Ma Qing Xue, and blinked her eyes, I know about her way of thinking, in ancient times, a woman normally would either like smart scholars or manly-oozing rugged heroes.
"Nope, no matter what type you are, I always liked it all."
Ma Qing Xue gave off a smile, and grasped my hands as we went towards the exclusive canteen for the Student Council members.
This kind of situation right now, no matter how you view it me and Ma Qing Xue looked like a loving couple, and Yè Zǐ wasn"t shy at all, just like that flirted around casually with Ma Qing Xue all the way.....my G.o.d......
How am I supposed to explain today"s events to Ma Qing Xue tomorrow.....although I indeed had confessed to her, but I still hoped to be a little conservative in our relationship.
If it wasn"t for my old veteran"s status, just my behavior today would warrant me being immolated by the school"s male body for an improbable amount of times repeatedly already.
"Zhang Jian.....when you"re drinking water, why must you use your hand to cover your mouth....."
"About this.....please don"t mind me....."
The habits from ancient times still resided within Yè Zǐ"s body, and if this goes on I have no idea how much more of a fool I"m going to display, so it"s best that I"d hurry up on returning home then......
For the afternoon cla.s.ses, under my stern warning, it ended with Yè Zǐ not doing anything outrageous at all, and from the moment that the after-school bell rang, I deeply gave off a sigh of relief within my heart.
"Yè Zǐ, go back immediately, don"t hesitate.....through the back door!"
"Can I play outside for a little while...."
"No way, it"s not that you can"t feel what I"m feeling right now too!"
"Mm....."
I"ve endured the entire day of not going to the toilet.....and as for the reason, of course it"s because I"m quite shy! So, I don"t want to do anything else right now, only just wanting to hurry on home to let Yè Zǐ come out and allowing me to properly use the toilet.
Hastily rushing back home, right now my endurance was up to the point where I had to temporarily forget off my shame and ask Yè Zǐ to clutch it, but it so deliberately happens that.....my house door entrance stood an extremely big trouble.
"Yo, Jian ge, want to come over and eat......"
"Xia meimei, please hold on for a moment, I have something urgent, allow me to first enter here before saying....."
"Jian ge, today your brain"s been clipped by the door.....no, there"s not a day where your brain wasn"t being clipped by the door before, so today you must have been clipped especially badly, why did you start calling me Xia meimei....."
"Let"s.....let"s first leave it at that, I"ll go in first and explain to you later when I come out......."
I can"t already hold it in any longer, I"m extremely uncomfortable right now, and Yè Zǐ"s feelings probably were the same as me too, there"s no need for me to tell her anything, she herself was very anxious as well.
"Why are you clutching over there? Is it because you"re hiding some kind of thing....show me and I"ll let you in!"
Xiao Ling pointed at me who was clutching onto my pants, to be more accurately....it"s Yè Zǐ, if it wasn"t being clutched I had the feeling that it would be disastrous.....
"There"s nothing at all......."
"There must be, let me see!"
"There"s indeed nothing at all!"
"Then just let your hands go."
"No, if I let go...."
"Not letting go, right? Take a look on what"s this?"
Xiao Ling didn"t continue on bulls.h.i.tting, and straightaway took out a taser that she always carried around, and if I was to be tasered by it, my entire body would be paralyzed....once my tightly suppressed concentration is relaxed, the outcome would be.....a fountain, a waterfall!
"What"s this thing......"
Yè Zǐ evidently didn"t know what a taser is used for at all, I"d better quickly explain to her, if not Xiao Ling would really go on and taser me.
"Yè Zǐ, this is a modern weapon that can make me instantly lose my ability to retaliate!"
I rapidly explained to her within my mind.
"Xia meimei.....I"m begging you, please let me go in first, I"ll agree to anything you say later!"
"Yè Zǐ! What are you saying, quickly renege it! I"d rather leak out than to agree to Xiao Ling"s conditions, my life"s at stake here!"
Tch, Yè Zǐ spouted out nonsense once again, Xiao Ling"s conditions, there"s never a single good one from it!
"Jian ge, this was what you promised! Go in then....."
Xiao Ling expertly took out my house"s keys, and actually helped me to open my door; where"s my privacy?! I remembered that Ma Qing Xue also had my house"s keys, looks like I"ll need to change my door lock already!!
The instant I entered the door, I flew towards the balcony, and my hands went to touch the Han clothing according to what Yè Zǐ had explained earlier; what followed next was a lightening of my body, and I hastily dashed towards the toilet.
"Ahhhhh........"
A satisfied sound oozed out from my lips, this kind of feeling was as relaxing as being reborn once again, and I felt my entirety almost floating up to heaven in the process.
Finally resolving the big problem within my heart, I walked out of the toilet to discover Xiao Ling already sitting onto the sofa of the living room waiting for me. I guess that she probably wants to negotiate conditions with me......d.a.m.n it, hopefully it"s not a condition where I would really have to lose my life.
"Jian ge, when will you accompany me to visit my lao bà for a trip, he says that he wants to see you."
"Eeh....your lao bà wants to see me for what....."
"He says that any person who had the audacity to hit on his daughter must die."
"Then aren"t you just letting me go there to die!!!"
"No, I said that you"re a very outstanding person, so.....lao bà said that he wants to give you a short test, since it"s possible that you may become the organization"s head in the future."
"May I ask.....if I reject this......"
"Bang! Boom! Ka thunk! Ka chak! Ting dong!"
Xiao Ling only imitated a few sound expressions, and I already thought as much of ten ways to die......
"Xiao Ling..., um....what kind of person is your father like....."
"What kind of person.....lemme think.....it"s probably a very ka-boom! type of person."
"Very ka-boom! type of person.....what kind of ka-boom! way?"
"It"s very simple, if someone p.i.s.ses him off, that person"s ending normally would be ka-boom!!"
Xiao Ling did a posture of firing a rocket launcher, this is indeed rather ka-boom!......if I really had went on to visit, I"ll definitely be dead without a corpse.....
"Alright....when I finished my final examinations, and written finish my will, and finished preparing what"s left then we"ll go off then....."
"Mm, Jian ge, I can first help you to reserve a coffin~, do you want it to be gold phoebe or agarwood; I can help you to pay the coffin"s fees; where do you want it to be buried; what material of mourning-clothes do you prefer; what kind of wreath pattern would you like; and do you want a eastern funeral or a western funeral?"
"Also, if you book reservations right now there"s still luxurious wailing services provided as well!"
"Why are you such an expert, how many people have you buried before!"
"About that....hehee..."
Xiao Ling slyly gave off a laugh, and didn"t say a word, but this laughing gave me a series of gooseb.u.mps.
"Rest a.s.sured, Jian ge, I"ve calculated your chances of survival already, it"s still quite big, probably about ninety-eight percent roughly."
"I"m quite a.s.sured now since you"ve said that......"
"I haven"t finished my sentence yet, it"s ninety-eight percent of dying, and one percent of being permanently crippled, and the last remaining one percent would be your survival probability."
"Huhuh, just let me die right now then."
No matter how you think of it, whatever plays out I"ll definitely always be dead!
"But, since I"m around, if there"s anyone who wants to take Jian ge"s life, they would have to go across my.....my corpse....forget it, it"s not worth it, so it"s better off that you die."
"Don"t you think that"s too cruel to me already, Xiao Ling...."
"As long as Jian ge listens to what I say, I guarantee that nothing will go wrong.....but if you don"t, we"ll both know what would happen in the end....."
"Don"t say anymore, just let me first finish my exams, but I"m still finished for my exams anyway......"
"Do you want to make a reservation right now?"
"Just give me the most luxurious one then....."
My future is completely a bleak patch of darkness....being brought overseas by Xiao Yu may unexpectedly be not a bad choice at all, like countries such as Germany, if something gone wrong it would be timely to have emergency treatment.
(TL: this "Germany" gag subtly refers to a famous real CN story of a wincest, where the brother had his leg broken by his dad after their affair was being exposed, and after deciding on prices of bone reparation online, he chose the reputable Germany doctors, before fully healing his leg injury.
Now the proverb is used to term brave knights who were fearless to being caught of wincest, daring to go Germany to have their legs repaired.)
After Xiao Ling had left, I started to think about the issue of my final examinations; letting Yè Zǐ continue possessing me wasn"t a wise choice after all, so I might as well ask her if she had any other ideas......
"Yè Zǐ, are you around? Are you heree....."
Walking around the house in a circle, I called out her name.
"Here."
I turned around to look, and she currently was standing by the balcony, with the cool night summer wind blowing onto her, as she curiously looked at the pa.s.serbys who walked about downstairs.
"Is there any other ways that can allow you to be awake during the day together with me...."
"There is, you can put on the Han clothing, and remember not to let it be exposed to under the sun will do."
"Can you attach onto any other things?"
"Sure I can....but it must be something that can last quite long, and objects that have spirituality within them."
"What"s spirituality?"
"It"s probably something that you"ll be able to differentiate it out from all the other similar items at a glance."
"Then does this count!"
I took one of my absolute best collection out, maybe it"s because I had carried this book around with me for a long period of time, that I had the nagging feeling that this book of collection slightly differed from other books of collection.
"It"s counts....but, you plan to let me attach to within this? Zhang childe, this....."
"Just make do for the time being...."
"No way, absolutely no way, this go against my family"s teachings!"
She rejected me righteously, wasn"t it just possessing my book for a short while, what"s the big deal about it....
"Then how about this piece of jade....."
"It"s extremely good, to us, this kind of natural jade are actually one of the best choice to attach onto."
This piece of jade was one of my collections from my lao bà, at that time I found it to be rather nice-looking, so I exerted a huge amount of effort to want it from him, and it unexpectedly ended up being useful right now.
"Let this piece of jade be shined on more by the moonlight, and when you bring it out tomorrow, just don"t let it be shined on by the sun will do."
"Mm, got it."
So I"ve probably resolved my exam"s problems, and after the exams, I"ll be able to have a delightful and youth vitality-br.i.m.m.i.n.g holidays, and be able to play around everywhere with Ma Qing Xue....... a pity, this exists only within my imagination.
The real scenario would be a rather gun-smokey holidays, since there"s still stuffs regarding Xiao Ling...
The few days afterwards, I once again returned back to my normal performance in cla.s.s, only that Ma Qing Xue kept lingering onto the few days back then, and just to explain the situation to her I spent quite a strenuous amount of effort to do so. During these few days I also didn"t see Liu Xiong and Jiang Tian looking for me to play as well, everyone"s been busying studying, and at this moment, I suddenly remembered there"s still w.a.n.g Yi who"s still far abroad at my hometown, so he"s considered to be finished.
"Zhang Jian, please do me a favor, this is Ma Qing Xue"s home address, she called to inform that she forgot her keys at the Student Council, go and help deliver this to her, I still have something on, plus you also seemed to be the most relaxed person among all of us too."
After school had ended, I"ve just walked out of the school gates when I was being stopped by Prez, and after she hurriedly finished her sentence she handed over a set of keys plus a note to me and ran back to the Student Council once more.
Really, that Ma Qing Xue, being so careless, forget it....I"ll just deliver this to her then, and Prez was right too, anyway I"m quite free as well.
I entered the address from the note into my phone"s navigation, and checked about the route to there, afterwhich I proceeded towards Ma Qing Xue"s house.
-ch 70 end-
(3073 words to tl)
Footnotes:
clipped = Xia Ling refers to it like when your hand get clipped by the door; this was the closest word I can find....
Glossary:
old veteran = it refers to Zj being very experienced, in the field of knowledge of x.x.x.
meimei = a suffix, "younger sister"
-ge = a suffix, "elder brother", shortcutted for affectionateness
lao bà = very informal and close way of calling "father"
-childe = a suffix, this is an ancient way to call someone "young master"Share
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