Listening there in the shadow, she heard, and flushed in her flesh and rejoiced in her innermost being. So he had _not_ forgotten her, which is the true and real infidelity that never can be forgiven, at any rate, by a woman. So she was still something in his life, although he had not answered her letter years ago.
Then she grew angry with herself. What did it matter to her what he was, or thought, or did? It was absurd that she could be dependent morally upon anyone, who must rely in life or death upon herself alone and on the strong soul within her. She was wroth with G.o.dfrey for exciting such disturbance in--what was it--her spirit or her body?
Nonsense, she had no spirit. That was a phantasy. Therefore it must be in her body which was her own particular property that should remain uninfluenced by any other body.
So it came about that the first words she spoke to him were somewhat rough in their texture. She stepped forward out of the shadow of the Georgian tomb and confronted him with a defiant air, her head thrown back, looking, to tell the truth, rather stately.
"I hoped that by this time you had given up talking to yourself, G.o.dfrey, which, as I always told you, is a bad habit. I did not hear much of what you were mumbling, but I understood you to say that you thought I was here. Well, why shouldn"t I be here?"
He stared at her blankly and answered:
"G.o.d knows, I don"t! But since you ask the question, _why_ are you here, Isobel? It is Isobel, isn"t it, or am I still dreaming? Let me touch you and I shall know."
She drew back a little way, quite three inches.
"Of course it is Isobel, don"t your senses tell you that without wanting to touch me? Why, I knew it was you from the end of the church.
But you ask me why I am here. I wish you would tell me. I was pa.s.sing, and something drew me into this place. I suppose it was you, and if so, I say at once that I resent it; you have no right----"
"No, no, certainly not, but do let me touch you to make sure that you are Isobel."
"Very well," she said, and stretched out a hand towards him.
He caught it with his left which was nearest, and then with his right hand reached forward and seized her other hand. With a masterful movement he draw her towards him, and though she was a strong woman she seemed to have no power to resist. She thought that he was going to kiss her and did not care greatly if he did.
But he checked himself in time, and instead of pressing his lips upon hers, only kissed her hands, first one and then the other, for quite a long while: nor did she attempt to deny him, perhaps because a wild impulse took possession of her to kiss his in answer. Yes, his hands, or his lips, or even his coat or anything about him. Oh! it made her very angry, but there it was, for something rushed up in her which she had never felt before, something mad and wild and sweet.
She wrenched herself away at last and began to scold him again.
"What have you been doing all these years? Why did you never write to me?"
"Because I was too proud, as you never wrote to me."
"Too proud! Pride will be your ruin; it goes before every sort of fall.
Besides, I did write to you. I can show you a copy of the letter, if I haven"t torn it up."
"I never got it; did you post it yourself?"
"Yes, that is I took it to the Abbey House and left it to be addressed there."
"Oh! then perhaps it is there still," and he looked at her.
"Nonsense, no one could have been so mean, not even----"
He shrugged his shoulders, a trick he had learned abroad, then said:
"Well, it doesn"t matter now, does it, Isobel?"
"Yes, it matters a lot. Years of misunderstanding and doubt and loss, when life is so short. I might have married or all sorts of things."
"What has my not receiving your letter got to do with that?" he asked, astonished.
"Nothing at all. Why do you ask such silly questions? I only meant that if I had married I should not have been here, and we should never have met again."
"Well, you are here and we have met in this church, where we parted."
"Yes, it"s odd, isn"t it? I wish it had been somewhere else. I don"t like this gloomy old place with its atmosphere of death. Come outside."
They went, and when they were through the churchyard gates walked at hazard towards the stream which ran through the grounds of Hawk"s Hall.
Here they sat down upon a fallen willow, watching the swallows skim over the surface of the placid waters, and for a while were silent.
They had so much to say to each other that it seemed as though scarcely they knew where to commence.
"Tell me," she said at length, "were you in the square garden on the night of that dance at which I came out? Oh! I see by your look that you were. Then why did you not speak to me instead of standing behind a bush, watching in that mean fashion?"
"I wasn"t properly dressed for parties, and--and--you seemed to be--very much engaged--with a rose and a knight in armour."
"Engaged! It was only part of a game. I wrote and told you all about it in the letter you did not get. Did you never kiss a flower for a joke and give it to someone, not knowing that you were being watched?"
G.o.dfrey coloured and shifted uneasily on his log.
"Well, as a matter of fact," he said, "it is odd that you should have guessed--for something of the sort did once happen quite by accident.
Also I _was_ watched."
"I!--you mean _we_. One doesn"t kiss flowers by oneself and give them to the air. It would be more ridiculous even than the other thing."
"I will tell you all about it if you like," he stammered confusedly.
She looked at him with her large, steady grey eyes, and answered in a cold voice:
"No, thank you, I don"t like. Nothing bores me so much as other people"s silly love affairs."
Baffled in defence, G.o.dfrey resorted to attack.
"What has become of the knight in armour?" he asked.
"He is married and has twins. I saw the announcement of their birth in the paper yesterday. And what has become of the lady with the flower?
For since there was a flower, there must have been a lady; I suppose the same whom you pulled up the precipice."
"She is married also, to her cousin, but I don"t know that she has any children yet, and I never pulled her up any precipice. It was a man I pulled, a very heavy one. My arm isn"t quite right yet."
"Oh!" said Isobel. Then with another sudden change of voice she went on. "Now tell me all about yourself, G.o.dfrey. There must be such lots to say, and I long to hear."
So he told her, and she told him of herself, and they talked and talked till the shadows of advancing night began to close around them.
Suddenly G.o.dfrey looked at his watch, of which he could only just see the hands.
"My goodness!" he said, "it is half-past seven."
"Well, what about it? It doesn"t matter when I dine, for I have come down alone here for a few days, a week perhaps, to get the house ready for my father and his friends."
"Yes, but my father dines at seven, and if there is one thing he hates it is being kept waiting for dinner."