Chapter 41: True Feelings, False Intentions
Translator: Atlas Studios Editor: Atlas Studios
“Chu Lui, let go of me, please.” She’d rather let him be cruel. His occasional kindness gave her hope, hope that he destroyed again with his own hands.
If he wanted to hate, then hate her completely without showing any gentleness, for she could not take any of it.
‘We’re both lonely.” Chu Lui’s arms tightened. She was in a daze, and she almost felt as if both hearts became closer.
Lonely. She had always been lonely. And it seemed that he was, too.
He seemed to be at the top of the world, but he was in fact, truly alone.
Her lips slightly moved, but she did not say anything in the end.
They were like two cactus, wanting to, but scared to be close. Just a little bit closer and either one would get pierced with the thorns. They would end up with a body of bruises.
Chu Lui narrowed his eyes and lowered his head onto Xia Ruoxin’s shoulders, and it stunned her. She was indirectly blaming him for his cruelty, but really, who was being the cruel one here?
“I have always been this merciless.” He placed his hand on her face, gliding across gently. “If I am not cruel to others, I will be the one to die. I have everything, but the reality is that all I have is nothing. You don’t know how long I’ve waited for Yixuan. After all these years, she was the only one who could make me feel like I’m living.”
“She was the one I had chosen since I was young. She was extremely adorable then, and so the moment I laid eyes on her, I decided that she was to be my future wife.”
“I waited and waited until she was old enough, and yet she still left me after she had grown older. Xia Ruoxin, I am cruel to you, but aren’t you the crueler one here? Do you know how I continued living after losing Yixuan? Hating you have become my life. If I don’t hate you, how can I bear the pain of losing Yixuan?”
He placed his hand on her lips at last. “Xia Ruoxin, don’t blame me. You’re not innocent. You killed my beloved Yixuan and hence, I will make you pay.”
Then he lowered his head and pressed his lips on hers. “Why aren’t you showing any resistance? I can’t bear hurting you if you’re like this.”
Suddenly, all Xia Ruoxin heard was him saying he could not bear hurting her. Her already ice-cold heart started beating again. He could not bear to hurt her?
Chu Lui tasted her tears between his lips—salty and bitter—the most genuine of tears.
“Xia Ruoxin, what kind of woman are you? Why can’t I see any trace of guilt, fear, and regret on you? You can even sleep in my matrimonial bedroom with Yixuan. What exactly are you thinking?”
He looked up, straight at her eyes—they were s.h.i.+ning brighter and brighter. These eyes were so clear, so beautiful, yet why did she have such a wicked heart?
“You love me so much you won’t even spare your own sister?” He murmured. His voice was light in her ears but it pierced harshly through her heart.
She had already said that she did not kill anyone, and yet was there anyone who would believe her all this while?
‘Xia Ruoxin, if I send you to h.e.l.l, I wonder if you’ll hate me instead of love me?’ His lips gently ma.s.saged her own pair until she opened them. Those were the only words he never said.