Lucky Pehr

Chapter 15

PEHR. That will be quite diverting. Admit the people!

VIZIER. The people? The people have nothing to do with the Government!

PEHR. But surely I shall have someone to rule over?

VIZIER. That is done in writing. [Takes out a few doc.u.ments.]

PEHR. Proceed!



VIZIER. In order to spare Your Royal Highness the weighty burdens of government on this, the first day of his reign, we have tabled all pet.i.tions but one, which can very easily be disposed of.

PEHR. That was stupid, but it can"t be helped now. Let"s hear it!

VIZIER. Aschmed Sheik, with face in the dust and with his heart"s prayers, begs that he may go over to the Sunnees" faith.

PEHR. What is the Sunnees" faith?

VIZIER. It is a sect, a dangerous sect.

PEHR. In what particular does it differ from the--ahem!--true doctrine?

VIZIER. A true Moslem greets Allah in this manner--[crosses hands on breast] but a sectarian does like this--[Pinches his nose and pokes his fingers into his ears.]

PEHR. [Laughing.] Well, can"t the man poke his fingers in his ears?

VIZIER. No; the laws of the land do not permit it.

PEHR. There is no religious liberty, then?

VIZIER. Yes, for the _true_ faith.

PEHR. But for the others?

VIZIER. There must be no others!

PEHR. Then I shall give them religious liberty!

VIZIER. That the Caliph can not do.

PEHR. Who can, then?

VIZIER. The Government alone.

PEHR. Who is the government?

[Vizier and all others present place a finger to mouth.]

PEHR. A secret?

VIZIER. That is the const.i.tutional despotism"s secret.

PEHR. But I had the liberty of changing the religion?

VIZIER. Politics is another matter!

PEHR. Then G.o.d save all peoples from politics! Must I begin my reign with the refusal of an humble pet.i.tion?

VIZIER. Your Highness cannot begin better than by strengthening the laws of the realm.

PEHR. But I"ll never sign!

VIZIER. It is not necessary; the Administration will attend to that.

The Cabinet is adjourned. Will it please Your Highness to lay aside his official attire and return to private life, with its petty diversions.

The Chamberlain is at Your Highness" service. [Goes.]

[The Chamberlain removes Caliph"s crown and sceptre and conducts him to divan. Enter Dancers, Singers and Poet Laureate. The Dance.]

PEHR. What is this company?

CHAMBERLAIN. This is the Court.

PEHR. Why do they wear such short dresses? I do not like that custom.

CHAMBERLAIN. It is the custom of the country, Your Highness.

PEHR. This at least is not politics.

CHAMBERLAIN. The first Court Singer begs that she may entertain Your Highness with an idealistic song written by the celebrated poet laureate, Hourgla.s.s-Link.

PEHR. Be good enough to entertain me!

SINGER. [With lute, sings.]

Then say farewell to Horaire, the march is already broken.

O army, hast thou the strength to say a farewell!

PEHR. Where"s the rhyme?

POET LAUREATE. There are no rhymes in this kind of poetry.

PEHR. That"s bad! Continue--

AMEER. [Aside to historian.] He"s not long for this place.

SINGER. Your Highness must pardon me, but I am indisposed to-day.

PEHR. Chamberlain, is there not something in the const.i.tution called bastinado?

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