CHAPTER 11 (Part two)
After the doctor departed, Mahnu got out of bed and slowly walked to the window. Her head still ached and she felt a little dizzy but she guessed it would all go back to normal again soon, since all her memories had returned. Mahnu sat down on the edge, peering out onto the street. The sufferings weren"t with her, silently, she hoped that they would not return. But, sometimes, she is able to hear thoughts, in which was becoming more often.
Watching a child run away from other children, Mahnu put into perspective of what she had paid for the box for two G.o.d"s. At first it was nearly everything, even her existence had been in danger. But, for quite some time, all she was, was mortal. Mahnu wondered if she had even become immortal again now, since she had received her memories and hearing thoughts of others.
Picking up a knife, Mahnu went to a candle and lit it. Putting the knife through the fire, she heard someone walk into the room.
"Mahnu? What are you doing?"
It was William.
Mahnu wasn"t surprised, knowing already that William would have been watching her like a hawk. Ever since he found her at Brackan, he"s rarely left her side.
"I am getting an answer." Mahnu said as she slightly sliced her arm.
William rushed towards her, putting his grip over the cut and looking for material to put over it.
"Wait. Please. I just need to see..." If it will heal, she thought.
She removed his hand and blood seemed to be still flowing from the cut. She looked at William, who had a piece of material now and put her arm out for him to strap it.
"Why did you do that?" He asked.
Mahnu looked on as he continued, "I wanted to know if it would heal. My memories have been restored. I am starting to hear others thoughts again...Wouldn"t you be just as eager, as I, to know if I could heal or not?"
He sighed, "No. I will get scolded now that you"ve been hurt."
"I will protect you."
"Mahnu!" He said, irritated. "You do not need to protect me or anyone else anymore! It"s time for you to relax. You have done enough!"
Mahnu sighed. "I am sorry for making you angry."
William let out a deep breath and went to the door. "I"m not angry. But...let us protect you now."
He went back to his post without looking back.
Mahnu was conflicted. She didn"t know any other way. For two years, she had lived without being a G.o.d but she had hardly been herself and it doesn"t even come close to the habit she had for over a thousand years! What...do I do with my existence now? What am I suppose to do?
Taking the strapped material around her arm off, she saw that it still hadn"t healed. Well it"s confirmed, I"m still mortal.
William took her arm forcefully and strapped it again, silently. She hadn"t even realized he had come back into the room again.
Do you want to be immortal again? Do you miss it? His thoughts made her wonder.
"I don"t know..."
When William finished, he left again. Guess I can"t blame her for being confused, he thought.
Mahnu walked towards the door and leaned on the frame. "I will try and not be a bother to you. But will you do me a favour?"
William turned to her willingly, "What would you like, Your..."
"Stop!" Mahnu was not in the mood to be called, "Your Highness." It was just a stupid t.i.tle. She much preferred her own name.
"My name is Mahnu, William! You will not call me otherwise! Do you understand?"
William was taken aback...Is this how the doctor had felt like just before!
Mahnu sighed.
"Yes, Mahnu. How can I help you?"
"Please bring me some food."
"Food?"
"Yes, I"m hungry."
It was the first time Mahnu had ever asked for food, she was still being reminded to eat and drink often before now...After a short, stunned, silence, he answered, "Straight away, I will do as you ask...Is there a preference to something you would like?"
Mahnu shook her head slowly, "No, not really."
"Right. I will return shortly."
Mahnu sighed again and smiled. Putting on another coat of clothing, she stepped outside the door.
She didn"t have the intention to run away, instead, Mahnu walked towards a nearby garden. It wasn"t big, only three different flowers and a small hedge but she felt a little more freedom. Now that she remembers who she is, it was like she had awoken for the second time. There seemed to be some things she had to talk to Richard about. One was the t.i.tle that she wasn"t going to repeat inside of her head again. Her name had rarely ever been spoken as it was! Is it wrong to like having people call me by my name?
Mahnu sat on the garden side chair and watched mindlessly as a b.u.t.terfly fluttered by. I"m not a weak little thing to cage up either.
For the first time, she missed her G.o.dly strength that would let her jump from tree to rooftop.
I...don"t want to be stranded in a palace. Mahnu sighed and closed her eyes, knowing all too well that Richard will want to keep her beside him. It"s not like I want to leave him, but...Mahnu looked around and found herself feeling boxed in.
Putting her feet onto the chair, she hugged her knees and put her head down. What do I want to do now? She asked herself honestly. Without the sufferings leading her life now, all she had was Richard. He definitely made her happy but why do I feel like I"m an unfinished puzzle?
"Mahnu?"
William"s voice startled her and she saw that he had brought a plate full of food. "Thank you."
William stared at her and asked, "Are you...crying?"
Mahnu was startled again. She had rarely ever cried in her entire existence and now it seemed to happen a lot more regularly. Wiping at her eyes, she hurriedly said, "No!"
William nodded to her but didn"t leave. He watched her pick up some food and eat it. Mahnu...His thoughts again, are you perhaps...Pregnant?
Mahnu looked up at him in shock, dropping her food. "Why would you think that!?"
William took a moment to collect himself and said, "Oh, you had never asked for food before now and I"ve never seen you cry so much."
"How does?..."
He looked away, "Uh! It"s nothing...The doctor would have known if you were pregnant and he never said such a thing. So forget what I said."
Mahnu was silent for a moment and nodded. "Okay."
William wondered if the doctor had got it wrong but Mahnu interrupted further thoughts by saying, "Enough William! Go far away now, please."
He put his head down and walked away.
Being alone, Mahnu picked at the food in front of her. She wanted to find out why she felt like an unfinished puzzle. Also, she didn"t want to depend on Richard. But the more she thought about it, the more confused she became.
Sighing, Mahnu tried to make her thoughts more simple. What is it that I want to do? Well, I used to help the humans, do I intend to continue doing so? Mahnu admitted that there was still things left to do to finish what she had started. The tablet...Mahnu nodded to herself. The tablet needed to be found.
But...she wasn"t a G.o.d anymore. Her strength is only that of a female human...She remembers what the monk had taught her centuries ago but doing those actions now would be different, she was sure of it. Feeling herself slowly become renewed, that she had found a purpose, she continued to wonder how to get strength...To help finish what she had started.
***
The King returned in the early afternoon to see Mahnu at the windowsill. "Have you been resting well?" He asked after kissing her head.
"I feel fine now."
King Richard felt something strange as he saw that she hadn"t even turned to him.
Was she in a bad mood? Did I do something wrong? He wondered.
"Yes! Don"t make people call me by a t.i.tle. I have a name!"
The King didn"t know how to respond. "They call you that because..."
"Yes, I know. Make it stop, please."
But, it"s tradition to call a King"s woman, Your Highness, he thought.
"I will not answer to it!"
The King found himself a little scared. Her voice sounded monotonous and she still had yet to turn and look at him. Including of what she was demanding, King Richard felt like there was something wrong. "Mahnu? What"s wrong?"
Mahnu finally turned to him and he saw a bandage around her arm. "Are you hurt?!"
"Stop it!"
The King stopped. Something was desperately wrong. "Mahnu?"
"That"s right!" She sniffed, a tear running down her cheek. "That"s my name! Please don"t take it away from me!"
Then she went into his arms and started to cry. He patted her head and rocked her. My sweet, beloved Mahnu, I will never forget your name.
Mahnu stopped crying as his warmth filled her. Had she always found comfort in his embrace?
Now that he was here, Mahnu felt herself calm down. Had she got mad because she missed him? It seemed so strange to her that she no longer was mad or sad. "I"m sorry but I feel better now." Mahnu sat back and wiped her eyes. "I"ve felt strange today. Maybe I"m having withdrawals from being a G.o.d...Or too much has happened too fast..."
The King picked up her arm, to investigate her wound, but said, "Did the doctor give you medicine?"
Why is she hurt?
"Don"t get mad at anyone. I did that, it looks like I am still mortal and I told the doctor to not worry about medicine."
Swearing under his breath, he stood up but Mahnu stopped him. "I told you not to get mad."
The King sighed and said, "Then what am I suppose to do!?"
Mahnu continued to stare at him. "The doctor only found that my temperature was a little higher but that nothing else was wrong. I told him I felt healthy."
Closing his eyes, the King slowly breathed out, "But he is to check you again tomorrow."
Mahnu smiled and nodded.
"And this?" He put her arm gently in front of her, demanding an explanation. "Are you..."
King Richard put his other hand to his mouth, unable to utter another word.
"It was...I was checking, it"s not deep and I treated it." Mahnu didn"t understand why he was so saddened. She wasn"t dead.
"Please, no more checking if you are mortal or not." His voice was thick of emotion and Mahnu found herself nodding because of it.
He hugged her then and Mahnu hugged him back, "I"m sorry." She realized that she had been apologising a lot lately.
She heard him let out a breath and say, "It"s okay...You really know how to stop my heart though..."
Marcus turned and walked towards William. "Speak!"
Upon hearing the King"s and Mahnu"s last conversation, Marcus was alarmed.
William openly told his leader everything that had transpired while they had been away. Marcus laid out punishment for William and returned back to his Majesty.
They were laughing and giggling like fools. Marcus took that time to re evaluate what William had told him.
First, the doctor. He decided he will get another, for a second opinion. Then, the demand for her name instead of the t.i.tle...All he could do was, while he was alone with her, he will do as she pleases but otherwise he could not. Mahnu asking for food for the first time and her crying...Marcus wondered if her moods were fluctuating, withdrawals or, maybe, depression? Marcus decided to speak to the new doctor prior to Mahnu"s next examination. Hurting herself was a problem and Marcus could not let that happen again. Turning, he spoke to William again, "She is not to even be scratched, understand!?"
William got down on a knee and put a hand to his heart, "I will guard her with my life!"
Marcus knew he meant it, then added, "Find another doctor and report back to me."
"Yes, Sir!"
Even though the King became increasingly busy, with memorials from the capital, Mahnu stayed beside him. They were on the bed and one of his hands were within both of hers. Mahnu had fallen asleep but King Richard did not pull his hand free from hers. It was really nice that he could be with her, even though he was busy. Concentrating wasn"t as hard as he had expected it to be!
Dropping down the page in front of him, Marcus looked at the King and said, "Your Majesty?"
"I will need more ink for this reply."
Marcus helped straight away, taking a glance in Mahnu"s direction, he asked, "Should I perhaps move her?"
"What?" King Richard looked at Marcus. "No. She is no bother to me."
Marcus sighed but became silent again.
"She will accompany us tomorrow to see Governor Sedric."
"Your Majesty!?"
The King put his free hand up to his lips angrily. "Shh!"
Marcus bowed and apologized in a lower voice.
Silence filled the room and Marcus could feel himself get angry. It was scary to him on how much power she had. To change a King so easily was unnerving and Marcus wondered if her being beside him would hinder the future of Kralaide.
"Marcus."
Looking up at the King"s voice, he replied, "Yes, Your Majesty?"
"...If I were to disappear, what would you do?"
His question astonished Marcus into silence.
King Richard looked up at him and continued, "Would you perhaps stay as the leader of the Loyal Royal Knights?"
"I...don"t...Why are you speaking of such things, Your Majesty?"
The King looked down at Mahnu, then sighed. "My beloved had a long day. But she made some decisions...Even though I wish she would included me more." He looked at Marcus again. "What I asked you, I wanted you to understand something."
Marcus was confused.
The King continued, "She knows things have changed now. She knows that she is no longer a G.o.d that doesn"t die but wants to make sure that everything will come to an end. Mahnu asked for my a.s.sistance to aid her with the tablet and wanted to know the box containing the two G.o.d"s will be well buried forever."
Thinking about the box, Marcus answered, "Tomorrow I will send someone for the news about the box."
"Please do." The King said. "And once we retrieve the tablet...It will be destroyed into unreadable pieces."
Marcus stared, wide eyed, at the King. "Your Majesty?"
"It was Mahnu"s idea and I agree with her."
"But the history..."
"Mahnu has consented to talk about her past and have it written down. But the locations of both, The Chest of the G.o.d"s and the box will not be written down, nor will information be give about whether they exist or not. People may eventually come to think of it as just a story, which is what I would prefer. We will also not put this history in the library for quite some time, just in case."
Marcus took a moment but nodded, "It is a wise plan, Your Majesty."
"You can thank Mahnu for that."
Marcus looked at her and admitted that she had thought that out well.
"So, you will a.s.sist in her protection, as she finishes her journey as a G.o.d. I can"t deny her of my help...Just like you, I"d a.s.sume you would continue being the leader of the Loyal Royal Knights, if something happened to me."
Marcus finally understood. The King wanted him to know that Mahnu had unfinished business.
***