ARTHUR WALTER: "Oh, it"s a long story! Perhaps relations quarrel because they are too much alike."
MARGOT: "You are not in the least like the Tennants!"
ARTHUR WALTER: "What makes you say that? Do you know them?"
MARGOT: "Yes, I do."
ARTHUR WALTER: "In that case perhaps you could take me to see the picture."
MARGOT: "Oh, certainly! ... And I know Mr. Gladstone too!"
ARTHUR WALTER: "What a fortunate young lady! Perhaps you could manage to take me to see him also."
MARGOT: "All right. If you will let me drive you away from lunch in my phaeton, I will show you the Gladstone picture."
ARTHUR WALTER: "Are you serious? Do you know them well enough?"
MARGOT (nodding confidently): "Yes, yes, don"t you fret!"
After lunch I drove him to 40 Grosvenor Square and, when I let myself in with my latch-key, he guessed who I was, but any interest he might have felt in this discovery was swamped by what followed.
I opened the library door. Mr. Gladstone was sitting talking to my parents under his own portrait. After the introduction he conversed with interest and courtesy to my new relation about the Times newspaper, its founder and its great editor, Delane.
What I really enjoyed most in London was riding in the Row. I bought a beautiful hack for myself at Tattersalls, 15.2, bright bay with black points and so well-balanced that if I had ridden it with my face to its tail I should hardly have known the difference. I called it Tatts; it was bold as a lion, vain as a peac.o.c.k and extremely moody. One day, when I was mounted to ride in the Row, my papa kept me waiting so long at the door of 40 Grosvenor Square that I thought I would ride Tatts into the front hall and give him a call; it only meant going up one step from the pavement to the porch and another through the double doors held open by the footman. Unluckily, after a somewhat cautious approach by Tatts up the last step into the marble hall, he caught his reflection in a mirror. At this he instantly stood erect upon his hind legs, crashing my tall hat into the crystal chandelier. His four legs all gave way on the polished floor and down we went with a noise like thunder, the pony on the top of me, the chandelier on the top of him and my father and the footman helpless spectators.
I was up and on Tatts" head in a moment, but not before he had kicked a fine old English chest into a jelly. This misadventure upset my father"s temper and my pony"s nerve, as well as preventing me from dancing for several days.
My second sc.r.a.pe was more serious. I engaged myself to be married.
If any young "miss" reads this autobiography and wants a little advice from a very old hand, I will say to her, when a man threatens to commit suicide after you have refused him, you may be quite sure that he is a vain, petty fellow or a great goose; if you felt any doubts about your decision before, you need have none after this and under no circ.u.mstances must you give way. To marry a man out of pity is folly; and, if you think you are going to influence the kind of fellow who has "never had a chance, poor devil," you are profoundly mistaken. One can only influence the strong characters in life, not the weak; and it is the height of vanity to suppose that you can make an honest man of any one. My fiance was neither petty nor a goose, but a humorist; I do not think he meant me to take him seriously, but in spite of my high spirits I was very serious, and he was certainly more in love with me than any one had ever been before. He was a fine rider and gave me a mount with the Beaufort hounds.
When I told my mother of my engagement, she sank upon a settee, put a handkerchief to her eyes, and said:
"You might as well marry your groom!"
I struggled very hard to show her how worldly she was. Who wanted money? Who wanted position? Who wanted brains? Nothing in fact was wanted, except my will!
I was much surprised, a few days later, to hear from G., whom I met riding in the Row, that he had called every day of the week but been told by the footman that I was out. The under-butler, who was devoted to me, said sadly, when I complained:
"I am afraid, miss, your young gentleman has been forbidden the house."
Forbidden the house! I rushed to my sister Charty and found her even more upset than my mother. She pointed out with some truth that Lucy"s marriage and the obstinacy with which she had pursued it had gone far towards spoiling her early life; but "the squire,"
as Graham Smith was called, although a character-part, was a man of perfect education and charming manners. He had beaten all the boys at Harrow, won a hundred steeplechases and loved books; whereas my young man knew little about anything but horses and, she added, would be no companion to me when I was ill or old.
I flounced about the room and said that forbidding him the house was grotesque and made me ridiculous in the eyes of the servants.
I ended a pa.s.sionate protest by telling her gravely that if I changed my mind he would undoubtedly commit suicide. This awful news was received with an hilarity which nettled me.
CHARTY: "I should have thought you had too much sense of humour and Mr. G. too much common sense for either of you to believe this. He must think you very vain. ..."
I did not know at all what she meant and said with the utmost gravity:
"The terrible thing is I believe that I have given him a false impression of my feelings for him; for, though I love him very much, I would never have promised to marry him if he had not said he was going to kill himself." Clasping my two hands together and greatly moved, I concluded, "If I break it off now and ANYTHING SHOULD happen, my life is over and I shall feel as if I had murdered him."
CHARTY (looking at me with a tender smile): "I should risk it, darling."
A propos of vanity, in the interests of my publisher I must here digress and relate the two greatest compliments that I ever had paid to me. Although I cannot listen to reading out loud, I have always been fond of sermons and constantly went to hear Canon Eyton, a great preacher, who collected large and attentive congregations in his church in Sloane Street. I nearly always went alone, as my family preferred listening to Stopford Brooke or going to our pew in St. George"s, Hanover Square.
One of my earliest recollections is of my mother and father taking me to hear Liddon preach; I remember nothing at all about it except that I swallowed a hook and eye during the service: not a very flattering tribute to the great divine!
Eyton was a striking preacher and his church was always crowded. I had to stand a long time before I could ever get a seat. One morning I received this letter:
DEAR MISS TENNANT,
I hope you will excuse this written by a stranger. I have often observed you listening to the sermon in our church. My wife and I are going abroad, so we offer you our pew; you appear to admire Eyton"s preaching as much as we do--we shall be very glad if you can use it.
Yours truly,
FRANCIS BUXTON.
The other compliment was also a letter from a stranger. It was dirty and misspelt, and enclosed a bill from an undertaker; the bill came to seven pounds and the letter ran as follows:
Honoured Miss father pa.s.sed away quite peaceful last Sat.u.r.day, he set store by his funeral and often told us as much sweeping a crossing had paid him pretty regular, but he left nothing as one might speak of, and so we was put to it for the funeral, as it throws back so on a house not to bury your father proper, I remember you and all he thought of you and told the undertaker to go ahead with the thing for as you was my fathers friend I hoped you would understand and excuse me.
This was from the son of our one-legged crossing-sweeper, and I need hardly say I owed him a great deal more than seven pounds. He had taken all our love-letters, presents and messages to and fro from morning till night for years past and was a man who thoroughly understood life.
To return to my fiance, I knew things could not go on as they were; scenes bored me and I was quite incapable of sustaining a campaign of white lies; so I rea.s.sured my friends and relieved my relations by telling the young man that I could not marry him. He gave me his beautiful mare, Molly Bawn, sold all his hunters and went to Australia. His hair when he returned to England two years later was grey. I have heard of this happening, but have only known of it twice in my life, once on this occasion and the other time when the boiler of the Thunderer burst in her trial trip; the engine was the first Government order ever given to my father"s firm of Humphreys & Tennant and the accident made a great sensation. My father told me that several men had been killed and that young Humphreys" hair had turned white. I remember this incident very well, as when I gave Papa the telegram in the billiard room at Glen he covered his face with his hands and sank on the sofa in tears.
About this time Sir William Miller, a friend of the family, suggested to my parents that his eldest son--a charming young fellow, since dead--should marry me. I doubt if the young man knew me by sight, but in spite of this we were invited to stay at Manderston, much to my father"s delight.
On the evening of our arrival my host said to me in his broad Scottish accent:
"Margy, will you marry my son Jim?"
"My dear Sir William," I replied, "your son Jim has never spoken to me in his life!"
SIR WILLIAM: "He is shy."
I a.s.sured him that this was not so and that I thought his son might be allowed to choose for himself, adding:
"You are like my father, Sir William, and think every one wants to marry."
SIR WILLIAM: "So they do, don"t they?" (With a sly look.) "I am sure they all want to marry you."
MARGOT (mischievously): "I wonder!"
SIR WILLIAM: "Margy, would you rather marry me or break your leg?"
MARGOT: Break both, Sir William."
After this promising beginning I was introduced to the young man.