With her thigh between his, Lily tried not to make too much of the way her heart swelled. Of course he liked her. Even if their relationship was only on a physical level, she"d always known he cared.
In the night, she listened to Adam"s even breathing, fast asleep next to her. She touched his chest and his arm automatically tightened around her. Lily smiled in amazement at how a person who was once a stranger could suddenly, without warning, become her entire world.
When she stirred and opened her eyes, it was morning and she was in Adam"s arm. She peeked at him, still asleep. She slipped out of his grip and as quietly as possible, pulled one of his T-shirts out of the dresser and over her body. She glanced back at him; still sleeping. She walked over to his side of the bed and appraised his appearance. His hair wildly tousled and stubble darkened his jaw. He looked disheveled, feral, sensuous, a perfect reflection of their night together. She lifted a hand to touch him but stopped. Her chest tightened with guilt and her stomach flooded with nausea.
s.h.i.t. Morning sickness. Lily turned toward the adjacent bathroom but quickly realized that was too close for comfort and rushed down the stairs. She walked-ran hastily down the hallway, hands over her mouth to the closest bathroom and heaved.
Clinging the porcelain toilet, she hurled again and again. Infinitely grateful that Adam was fast asleep, she took her time coming to her feet. Splashed some cold water over her face and rinsed her mouth. She needed to sit down and reflect, better yet, find her purse, take her pre-natal and think of a way to tell Adam the truth.
She pulled in and then slowly released a deep breath, opened the door and gasped as she almost b.u.mped into Adam. He stood there in low slung jeans, his face a dark mask, holding her hostage at the threshold.
"Adam."
He tilted his head. "None other."
The coldness in his eyes chilled her to the bone. He leaned back and she walked past him, refusing to look at him. She made her way to the family room and located her purse. She knew he followed. His presence was not something she could ignore. Still, she tried.
"I"m going to give you two minutes to tell me what I"ve finally figured out."
Heart in her throat, she found the pre-natal bottle and palmed it in her hand.
"I need water," she said and escaped into the kitchen. To her relief, he didn"t follow. After swallowing the pill, she pulled out her phone and scrolled to Minka"s name.
Hey Minka, I"ll be over soon.
Her friend texted back.
Tell him.
She placed the phone on the counter, took a deep breath and squared her shoulders as she walked into the family room. She found Adam standing by the large window overlooking the private beach, his back ramrod-straight.
"It crossed my mind last night," he said, his back to her. "Your b.r.e.a.s.t.s are different. Fuller."
d.a.m.n. She hadn"t given much thought to the slight changes of her body. Truth be told, she didn"t think he"d noticed.
"I know every inch of your body, Liliana, probably better than I know my own."
The hitch in his voice tore through her. Pain...she paused, a.n.a.lyzing the sound; disappointment, that"s what it was. She"d disappointed him. Unsure of what she should do, Lily wrapped her arms over her chest.
"I"m pregnant," she said softly, her heart hurting with each word for not telling him right away. "Starting my seventh week."
He turned to face her, his gaze cold and unyielding. "When were you planning on telling me? Or was that not part of your equation?"
No. He had it all wrong. Of course she wanted to tell him. She started to take a step forward but stopped. Tension crackled in the air. Everything about him told her not to dare come too close. "I tried..."
He sneered. "When did you try? Was it the time you broke things off via a f.u.c.king text?"
He looked at her, rage in his eyes, skin bloodless beneath his tan. She looked away.
"Or maybe the other night at Vapor? G.o.d d.a.m.n it, Lily! You"ve had how many opportunities to tell me?"
The sound of her shortened name cut her. She could count on one hand the times he had addressed her by it. They had disagreements before, but over mundane things. Her heart pulsated against her chest. The last thing she wanted to do was to cause him grief.
"I"m sorry, Adam. I had every intention of telling you. I just needed...some time to sort things out."
"And did you sort them out? Was us f.u.c.king all night part of the sorting out?"
There was a strange note in his voice. In spite of her pain, she smiled. "No. We f.u.c.ked because you"re my weakness," she admitted. "A weakness that I was trying to overcome." She waited for him to interject. When he didn"t she continued. "You touch me and set my body on fire. I want you in the worst way, your taste and the feel of your skin next to mine. You"re not the only one who is addicted, Adam, but physical attraction is not enough to raise a child." Lily exhaled. "That"s why I didn"t tell you."
He just looked at her for what seemed like eternity, his eyes blazing. "There"s something else. Tell me what it is. Tell me the whole truth before I lose my f.u.c.king mind."
"I knew if I told you, you"d want to marry me. I don"t want to marry you."
Chapter Thirteen.
"It is much easier to become a father than to be one."
Kent Nerburn The silence in the room was deafening. Lily braced herself for the explosion, the questions, maybe even accusations. What she found was even worse-a stoic expression, revealing nothing. Adam stood there, his posture stiff. The only hint of some sort of reaction was the way his rigid bicep muscles flexed involuntarily.
He didn"t say anything, but she felt the tension vibrating from his body. She"d hurt him. The realization made her queasy because honestly, she hadn"t realized she could cause him any type of anguish.
"I"m pregnant." Her voice cracked on the word this time.
After what seemed like eternity, he let out a short breath and ran a hand over his face. His palm moved to his corded neck and stayed there for a beat. The act was unintentionally s.e.xy and just so totally Adam. Her heart twisted.
"I had every intention of telling you," she said quietly.
His eyes flicked through the room then moved back to her face. The hardness in them sent chills down her spine. He took a step forward, she shuffled back.
"I found out two days before I arrived here."
He said nothing.
For good measure, she added. "And he"s yours." Somehow, it seemed fitting to refer to their baby as he. A version of the man standing before her.
"I don"t believe I questioned you about that." His voice was deceptively calm.
She didn"t trust it. The way his jaw flexed, eyes sharp and cold just like the rest of his facial features, told her he was fired up and ready for war.
An awkward silence settled in the room while they stared at each other. Lily eventually looked away, grabbed her purse and turned to walk out of the room. As she brushed past him, one hand caught her waist and held her still. The movement caused his T-shirt she wore to ride up a bit, exposing her bare thighs.
"Where are you going?"
She cleared her throat. "To get dressed. I booked a room at Martha"s Way."
"Cancel it."
"Adam..."
"We"re not done," he said in a menacing whisper. "I let you speak; now you"re going to listen."
Lily swallowed, her gut clenched with antic.i.p.ation. His hand fell away from her waist, but he was still standing way too close.
"We are getting married," he said, his voice low and definitive. "It is not about what you want. You"re pregnant with my child. We get married. End of story."
What? No. And just like that her temper flared. "I told you I don"t want-"
He cut her off. "I told you, this is not a choice to be made. Not for you or for me."
Because she needed all the strength she possessed, Lily stepped back, tilted her head up and looked at him. He was totally serious, not a hint of amus.e.m.e.nt on his handsome face. This couldn"t be happening. "You"re willing to be miserable for the rest of your life for the sake of a child." It wasn"t a question; this had been her fear all along.
He looked unperturbed. If anything, she caught a hint of a smile. "We won"t be miserable. The s.e.x is good."
She let out a chuckle, not of amus.e.m.e.nt, more out of the ridiculousness of their conversation. "We"re over, Adam, and now you know why."
A do-not-f.u.c.k-with-me look crossed his face. "We"re not over. We are just beginning."
The finality of his words made her stomach hurt, but more than that, it made her mad. If Adam wanted a fight, then he"d get one. One of the many things she learned growing up with three pain-in-the-a.s.s brothers was a woman needed to grow a pair once in a while. Chin up, she walked right to him and stabbed a finger into his hard chest. "You don"t get to tell me what to do," she said between clenched teeth. "We"re over." She turned on her heels and walked past him.
Lily reached the doorway when Adam caught her hands. The whole thing happened too fast. His fingers laced in hers, chests pressing against one another. With his weight he directed her to the wall, raised her arms up over her head, and caged her in. Not one to cower, she looked straight into his eyes.
"You don"t love me," she whispered.
His jaw tightened, but he made no attempt to dispute otherwise. Her heart scattered in tiny little pieces. She hadn"t expected a declaration of undying love, but the reality still stung.
"I need love, Adam. That mad, pa.s.sionate love. It should be experienced at least once in a lifetime." She examined his stoic expression, and her posture sagged. The fact she was forever bonded to a man who didn"t love her smacked her in the face. It shouldn"t. She already knew that. But...still, reality sucked. "That"s not who we are."
She waited for him to speak.
He didn"t. Instead he sent her a long, pained look then slowly released his grip and put some distance between them.
Lily swallowed hard, her heartbeat slowing to a grinding thud. This was her life, pregnant and in love with a man who wanted to marry her for the sake of their unborn child. Feeling small, weak, and defeated, she turned to leave.
"What about you, Liliana?"
The question ripped through her. She stopped, but didn"t dare look at him. Still, she felt him move to erase the distance between them once again. His hands gently grabbed her arms and turned her to him.
"Look at me."
Slowly, she tilted her head and met his gaze.
"You"ve told me how I feel." His gaze swept over her face. "But you haven"t told me how you feel."
The heart had a way of wanting what it wanted. Of aching to override reason and common sense. Even now, wounded, dulled with sadness, hers still ached for Adam. Hearts were wild creatures that way.
I"m in love with you.
The pain in her chest hurt like a deep gash. She took a deep, laboring breath and tried to get a grip of her emotions, but the liquid sadness flowed down her cheeks, leaving a wet trail in the path.
Oh, d.a.m.n. Adam could taste the tears as if they were his own. And true enough they were rolling down her cheeks. He could handle a lot from a woman but tears; yeah, he was f.u.c.ked. He reached for her, but Lily turned on her heels and ran down the hall. Seconds later, the door slammed, hitting him like a sucker punch.
All of a sudden the room felt too large. He stood there feeling smaller and smaller as he searched for the right words, the right action, and the right way to feel. A cannon ball had blown through him and left a gaping hole in his stomach. He was going to be a father. Dad. Padre. Pere. Vater. It didn"t matter what language he translated it into, it was scary as h.e.l.l. They had to marry. No ifs, ands, or buts about it, but bringing Lily around to the idea was clearly going to take some work. His gaze landed on his cellular phone on the coffee table. He picked it up and pressed on the names of the three men he viewed as brothers.
Meet at Vapor in twenty.
Within seconds the phone buzzed back. He scanned their responses.
Can"t...patients. Full day today.
Forrest"s office was always busy with so-called "sick" patients.
Blake"s text followed.
In a meeting with Jason and his father. Sorry, bro.
Adam responded.
Twenty.
Blake and Forrest responded almost simultaneously.
Noon.
Jason added.
This better be good, a.s.shole.
Adam checked the time on his cell. He had less than two hours to kill. His thoughts on auto drive, he started toward the bedroom and stopped. A vision of Lily"s quivering lips still fresh in his mind. He"d give her time. h.e.l.l, he needed time. Changing direction, he made his way down the stairs to the laundry room. From the clean bin, he pulled out a wrinkled, long-sleeved T-shirt and changed into sweats. Tension caused his leg muscles to tighten. A good run and a cold shower should bring him some relief.
At exactly noon, the four men sat at the round table on the far left of the bar. Other than a few stragglers left for the last wave of the foliage, the place was empty. Maxie placed chilled beers on the table.
"Thanks, Maxie," Adam muttered.
"Want some food?"
All four shook their heads. She smiled at them then walked away leaving the three other men waiting for Adam to explain. He took a swallow of cold beer then let out a breath.
"You look like you just saw death," Jason was the first to speak. "Want to spill it?"