"No matter how attractive a person"s potential may be, you have to date their reality."
Mandy Hale Tired and weary after her fourth trip to the bathroom to heave, Lily had hoped the shower would help. It didn"t. She slipped into another of Adam"s T-shirts, stepped inside the sunlit bedroom and came to an abrupt halt. There sat Adam on the bed, with his back against the ecru upholstered headboard, one leg hanging off the edge with the other planted on the floor. He vibrated tension and looked morose, a complete contrast to the room"s relaxed, sophisticated atmosphere.
His gaze swept her from head to toe, rested on her bare thighs, then went back to her face. For a brief moment, she caught a glimpse of the pa.s.sion that existed between them, but it was quickly masked as he brought her attention to the dress in his hands, the one she wore last night. At some point, he"d torn it from her body, she just couldn"t remember exactly when that occurred.
"I"m sorry about your dress," he apologized, his voice quiet. "It looked good on you."
Tension filled the room, not the good s.e.xual kind. More like, s.h.i.t you"re pregnant with my child kind of tension. It made her uncomfortable. Not quite sure how to react, Lily walked over and took the dress from his hands. "It"s not a big deal."
"Liliana."
The way his voice rippled her name in that seductive accent caused her insides to quiver with apprehension and she clutched the dress for comfort.
"I a.s.sume you"ve been to the doctor."
She nodded, her posture rigid.
"I am going to ask Forrest to stop by later to check up on you."
"Adam, I"m fine."
But his fingers were already typing away on his phone.
He looked her over once more. "You look pale." He noted. "Let him check your blood pressure or something." He put up a hand to stop any incoming argument. "For my own sanity."
This made her smile. "Okay, if it will keep you sane." She walked over to the battered Ludlow trunk at the end of the bed and placed the dress on top of a mocha-colored cable-knit throw. "But you do realize Forrest is a family doctor." She glanced over at him, a small smile touched his lips and her heart squeezed a little.
"Did you cancel the room you booked at Martha"s Way?"
Lily shook her head and his jaws clenched.
"What do you want from me, Adam?" she asked after a moment of silence. It was time to address the big elephant in the room. He did say he wanted to talk, so might as well get to it. "I mean, I won"t keep you away from our child. That was never my intention."
"Then what is your intention?"
She shrugged because really she had no clue. "I don"t want to be the one to turn you into someone you"re not."
"And what is that someone?"
"A father, a husband," she answered without a beat.
He rose from the bed, walked to where she stood, cupped her face in his hands and kissed her fully on the lips, rocking her universe and claiming her and their child in the process. Automatically, her hands thrust into the silky strands of his hair and Lily opened her mouth to urge him in. When he finally broke for air, she leaned into him, craving his touch.
"As of today, we are officially dating," he said, with his arms around her.
Caught off guard, her body stiffened and she squeezed her eyes shut. Once again, Adam was taking over and mentally she was too weak to fight. s.p.a.ce. She needed to put s.p.a.ce between them so she could think clearly. With a little shove, she broke away from his hold and walked to the opposite side of the room and sat on the bed.
"You said no marriage," he continued, "so I will not push. But we deserve a chance to see if we like each other. I"m asking that we try."
"Would you have suggested that if I wasn"t pregnant?"
Adam glanced at her and she met his gaze straight on.
"Probably not," he answered. "But," he quickly added, "It"s not because I don"t like you, Liliana." He paused. "It"s because I"m not the type of man a woman dates, falls in love with, or marries, for that matter."
"From what I can see, you"re pretty dateable."
"You don"t know me," he answered, his expression etched in stone.
The words floated in her head and pulled at her heart. There was something in his voice, if she didn"t know better, she could label as pain but dismissed it. From the outside looking in, Adam had the perfect life, rich, carefree with doting parents, and a wonderful group of friends. For the first time, she wondered if there were more layers to the man she had been sleeping with.
"Are you still hung up on that cheating a.s.shole?" he asked when she didn"t speak.
The question surprised her so much that she almost laughed. "It"s been over a year. I think it"s fair to say I"m over the whole disaster."
"I"m your rebound," he reminded her.
From the bed, she glanced at him and was surprise to read the seriousness on his face. Maybe that night on the beach he had been, but somewhere along the way he"d stopped playing that role. "You"re not my rebound," she said gently.
He shoved his fingers through his hair then came to sit next to her, his thighs brushed against hers. His hand reached for hers and netted their fingers. "I will stay committed to you."
She chuckled because he didn"t have a clue how fast he made her heart race. "You make it all sound like a business deal."
He shook his head, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "No, this is the start of our story."
Had it been up to her, Lily would have never opened herself to another man again. Been there, done that with Nate, the two-timing b.a.s.t.a.r.d. There was no need to end up with another engagement ring in the ocean. And this time, there would be no Adam to turn to, make love to; he"d be the reason for her heartbreak. Not that she was afraid to take a stab at love again, maybe just afraid of getting hurt all over. The pain would be more intense this time around, and it scared the c.r.a.p out of her because there wasn"t one person in the world she wanted more than the man holding her hands.
Loving him terrified her.
Still, she was more afraid of the idea of walking away without giving them a chance.
With their fingers laced together, she glanced at her left ring finger and exhaled. Maybe there were no right moments, right guys, right answers...maybe sometimes one just had to say what the heart was feeling.
"All right," she said quietly. "I will date you, Adam."
She just had to stick to her initial decision and not let him convince her into a loveless marriage. But h.e.l.l, at least there"d be guaranteed great s.e.x.
Adam tried to focus on anything but the relief that hit him like a gush of cold air. Only his mind went flying to how hot she looked and how easy he could have her naked. With one swift movement he could tear off the small barrier of clothing between them and jump her. s.h.i.t. Semi-hard, he jerked upright and released her hand. He needed to have another talk with his conscience.
"You said you"ve been to the doctor," he repeated the words from earlier; baby talk should do the trick.
Her eyes narrowed. "Yes."
"Ultrasound to make sure..." His voice trailed off the last words. Just the possibility of not discovering a heartbeat gave him agita.
"All done."
"By yourself?"
Staring at him, she shook her head. "No. One of the nurses stayed with me. She"s a friend."
But her voice trembled and Adam cursed himself for letting her go through such an ordeal technically alone. "From now on I go to all doctor appointments with you. Is that understood?"
She gave him a faint smile. "I live in New Jersey, Adam. How do you intend to do that from here or wherever you may be?"
"I"ll be there. Just tell me and I"ll be there."
She held his gaze. "You"ll drop everything to be by my side for our child?"
"Yes."
She stood up and came to stand in front of him. His friends" words echoed in his mind. During the drive back to the house, the sudden thought had hit him like a s...o...b..ll made of granite-no more s.e.x between them. He needed to quench his desire to own every inch of her and connect on a deeper level besides the physical intimacy. Whatever the f.u.c.k that meant in guy-land.
Just to be on the safe side, he took a step back but Lily was already pressing her sweet s.e.xy body against him. She kissed his ear. He could hear her breath as she did so, making things more intense.
"Let"s use the next few days to discover each other."
Her voice carried implications as she wrapped her arms around him. For a brief second, he thought about going at it once more. What was once more? He sucked in air and released her arms from his neck. A frown crossed her face.
"We have one rule though."
Her head fell back. Eyebrows squished together, lips pursed, she gave him a look. "So no more any-strings-attached-but-exclusive rule. That"s out the window, right?"
"Right."
"But there"s a new rule to us dating?"
"Yes."
She rolled her pretty brown eyes, tucked a handful of hair behind her ear and laughed. She never looked more beautiful to him. And everything about her was screaming take me. He ached for her. This was going to be harder than he thought.
"Liliana." He tried to sound curt but failed.
She cleared her throat. "Oh boy, I"m scared. You look serious." One delicate hand touched her flushed face. A sigh slipped through her lips. "Okay, give it to me."
"No more s.e.x."
Her eyes widened in shock. "What?"
"Liliana." He reached for her hands but she swiped him away.
"Don"t call me that."
"That"s your name."
"Yeah, but..." she let out an exasperated sigh. "When you say it in that s.e.xy Italian drawl, I immediately get wet. And now you"re saying no s.e.x." She paused, crossed her arms over her chest. "What do you mean no s.e.x?"
"s.e.x will cloud our judgment." Yeah, even in his own ears his excuse sounded weak.
Her teeth caught her bottom lip, mulling over his words.
So he decided it was the best time to lay the ground rules. "We"ve been having s.e.x for over a year now and barely know each other. All I"m asking is for a chance for us to do that."
Who the f.u.c.k was this person talking? Adam wanted to know. And while at it, he"d like to get his b.a.l.l.s back.
"And after that?" she asked in a low voice, filled with suspicion.
"We continue as we were." And I intend to kidnap you to an island and keep you there until you become Mrs. Aquilani. But she didn"t have to know that.
"Continue having s.e.x, you mean."
He huffed. s.h.i.t, he was beginning to feel like the one being used. "Yes, continue to have s.e.x if that"s what you want, but you"ll be pregnant and all."
"So."
He stared at her.
She tossed up her hands. "Pregnant women still have a s.e.x drive, Adam. As a matter of fact, it increases."
That"s right; he read about that once somewhere. "Like now?"
She nodded. "Yes." She released a deep breath. "Thank G.o.d I brought Bob."
Now he was lost. "Who the f.u.c.k is Bob?"
With a jutting chin she deliberately raised her eyebrows. "Battery Operated Boyfriend, also known as BOB," she spat out the words.
He frowned, his muscles and veins straining against his skin. Lily had a d.i.l.d.o. How the h.e.l.l did he not know about that? His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer. "You have a d.i.l.d.o."
It was a statement, but she smiled and gave him a dismissive nod. "You"re not always around. A girl has needs."
"Okay, then play with your d.i.l.d.o. But-" He stopped and stared at her. "I get to watch."
She shrugged. Whatever. Crossed her arms over her chest, gave him another uneasy look before dropping her sweet a.s.s on the bed and turned her back to him. From any other woman, he would have found the act irritating and annoyed the s.h.i.t out of him. But not with Lily. For a minute, he studied her, sighed and put both hands on his forehead. He was torn between the devil and the angel sitting on his shoulders; one wanted to remind her a f.u.c.king d.i.l.d.o couldn"t do the job, not like he could, and the other wanted to take care of her. Finally, he walked out of the room and didn"t look back until he was by the door.
"You and I are going on a date tomorrow," he announced.
She didn"t answer. Adam swore under his breath before closing the door behind him. Thoughts of Lily pleasuring herself in the room burned his brain. His friends were idiots, which made him an even bigger idiot for believing he could be around her and not want s.e.x.
Chapter Fifteen.