"All is fair in s.e.x and o.r.g.a.s.ms."
Facing him, she looked into his eyes. "So we"re doing it." While she was thrilled by the idea of rolling in the sand with Adam, there was the mental apprehension over the ramifications of her actions. Empty s.e.x with strangers had never been her thing.
He nodded. "If that"s what you want."
Oh, she wanted. Especially after seeing all he had to offer. She really wanted. "I want."
"Me."
"You."
When his hand cupped the back of her neck and pulled her forward, she followed, completely forgetting the place and the denial of his attraction she was supposed to be harboring. His mouth brushed hers, his voice a whisper of feathers touching her lips. "No regrets."
Adam"s lips felt hot on her neck, making her shiver. "No regrets," she repeated the words just before his teeth sank into her shoulder.
Chapter Seven.
"Your heart and my heart are very old friends."
Rumi Quote Art "Welcome to the Vineyard! Leave your troubles behind and enjoy your stay on our beautiful island," the conductor announced as the ferry docked. This meant they were in Vineyard Haven, one of the main points of entry to the Vineyard. Lily breathed a silent thank you; her stomach had felt every ripple of the ocean.
Typically, this announcement shot excitement through her veins since it meant Adam was waiting for her. Today, she found herself chewing her nails several times. On each occasion, she"d forced herself to keep her hand from her mouth. It didn"t quite work, as she found himself chewing again barely a minute later.
Nerves. She drew a deep breath for strength. There was no delaying their reunion.
She remained seated by the window as visitors, lost in their excitement, walked by lazily down the stairs to the lower level to retrieve their cars or bikes. Reaching for her overnight bag, she rose to her feet and lined up behind a mother trying to control three high-energy boys while supporting a baby girl on her hip. The woman dropped her shoulders in defeat and walked ahead of the boys, as if she were leaving them behind, which they seemed to find amusing. The boys giggled and ran after their mother. The scene made Lily wonder if that was how it had been for her parents.
How the h.e.l.l did she miss the interaction between parents and children before?
That was birth control in itself. Pure, total abstinence; the best form of birth control because its effectiveness didn"t vary based on whether or not one was on antibiotics. Well, it was better late than never because she had officially sworn off s.e.x. No mas-no more.
Nauseous and lightheaded from it all, she made her way into the waiting area and scanned the room, ready to come face to face with her baby"s daddy. Only there was no sign of Adam. Lily reached through her purse and swiped the phone; no text. A pang of disappointment shot through her. She quickly reminded herself she was the one who ended things between them. Still, she hadn"t expected him to throw in the towel so easily.
"I convinced him to let me come instead."
Lily recognized the soft, feminine voice right away. Smiling, she turned and fell into the arms of her best friend. After a long moment of silence, she finally pulled away from Minka and focused on her friend. "Wow, you look amazing, and so freaking happy."
Minka wore a red motif shirtdress with high brown boots and a denim jacket. Her curls, pulled away from her glowing face, giving the world full access to the happiness sparkling in her hazel eyes. One would have never guessed, the woman standing before her spent most of her life struggling with self-esteem and body image issues.
"And you look like you just saw a ghost," Minka observed, concern now on full display on her pretty face. "Or is it disappointment since it"s me here and not Adam?"
Yes. No. Lily shook her head. "Maybe a little," she admitted. "But I"m so glad to see you."
Minka took the overnight bag from her. Which wasn"t necessary, but Lily didn"t argue. "Adam is at Vapor with Forrest. Jason is in Boston and due back late tonight," she said as they walked toward the door. "I was thinking we"d go back to the house, grab a bite, and you can tell me what"s wrong."
Lily nodded. "When are Blake and Keely coming back?" Keely was Minka"s fraternal twin who married Jason"s friend Blake last summer. The circle was tight. By default, she automatically felt welcomed by them.
"They"ll be back later in the week and Claire will arrive as well, but you know she has a busy schedule. Her visit will be short." Claire was Keely"s BFF, and was raised by Jason"s parents. Jason and Claire grew up like siblings in the same house.
She met Claire last year at Jason"s photography show. They had immediately sparked a friendship. But other than that initial meeting, their paths had not crossed. The African-American/Asian singer and designer was always on the road. Their communication had been primarily through emails and text messages. "Yes, she mentioned she"s on location shooting her movie."
"South America," Minka chided. "She"s filming a romantic comedy and having a real romance with her co-star, according to the tabloids."
She tried to listen as Minka chatted about Claire"s possible hot romance, but her mind drifted. South America sounded nice right about now. Sunny. Far away. She could run there and raise her baby, but the thought of Adam chasing her down made her shiver.
"How did she find time to design your dress?" Claire had also designed Keely"s dress. Which made sense, since the ladies were BFFs. And from meeting her last year, it was obvious the woman had a heart of gold.
Minka pointed to her parked black Audi; side by side they walked over to the car. "She finds a way."
"Please tell me she finished your dress."
Minka smiled. "All done. She"s bringing it this week for a final fitting."
Lily grinned with happiness. "Wonderful! I can"t wait."
As they slid into the sleek car, Minka"s face reflected all the happiness Lily knew her friend had found by falling in love with Jason and coming to terms with who she was.
"I"m excited," Minka announced with a huge grin.
Lily smiled, feeling her friend"s excitement. In two days, this was the first time she was able to stop dwelling on her impending motherhood and not worry for one full minute. "You"re going to be the most beautiful bride ever."
Minka slipped her arm in the crook of Lily"s. "I asked Adam to give us a few hours. I literally had to beg."
The thought of Minka begging Adam for a bit of time to get to the bottom of things warmed her.
"But he"s coming tonight to pick you up."
"I"m pregnant." The words left her mouth and made the whole situation real. Well, more real than ever. She watched the shock registered on her friend"s face and let out a nervous laugh. "Yup. Knocked up. A bun in the oven. I"m having a baby." She choked on the words.
Minka slammed on her brakes and slid the car into a parking spot. Thank G.o.d the summer rush on the island had long dwindled; otherwise, they would have taken at least three lives. After a long pause, her friend turned and faced her. Lily smiled weakly.
"You and Adam are having a baby, not just you."
Lily tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Does he know?"
She shook her head.
"You will have to tell him, Lily. He"ll do the right thing."
It was the right thing that caused the muscles in her stomach to close in like tightening coils. "I don"t intend on keeping him away. I just don"t want to sleep with him anymore."
"If you weren"t pregnant, would you still be sleeping with him?"
She didn"t need to think about it. The answer was h.e.l.l-to-the-f.u.c.king-yes. "You know I would. He"s..." She paused, searching her brain for the right word.
"Non-committal," Minka finished for her.
"Yes."
"Fun and dangerously s.e.xy."
Lily couldn"t help but chuckle. Only a year ago, she had spoken similar words to her friend. Now the role was reversed. "There"s an irony here," she said with a smile.
Minka released her hand and chuckled, understanding the reference to her own situation with Jason only a year ago. She sat back and started the engine and started driving. "Do you want a commitment from Adam?"
"No," she answered just a bit too quickly. "I don"t." She tried to sound a little more convincing this time.
"Why?"
"That"s not what our relationship is based on."
"Jason and I started as f.u.c.k buddies."
Good point. But Lily was more pleased that Minka was now comfortable saying f.u.c.k. "You said f.u.c.k."
The blush on her friend"s cheek told her Minka was still adjusting. "Jason likes when I say it," she admitted in a low tone.
And that made Lily laugh a little louder than she intended. She didn"t care. She was relaxed with Minka and felt like herself again. Like coming home. She leaned back and adjusted her seat belt. Minka pulled out her phone and with quick fingers sent a text to someone. Adam.
"What did you tell him?"
"That I am stealing you for the night. And I"ll bring you to him tomorrow."
Lily"s heart squeezed. "Thank you."
Minka dismissed the words with a wave of her hand. "Tonight, we drink seltzer water and talk about babies."
"I"d rather talk about your wedding day."
"We can talk about my wedding day and your little bun in the oven," she said wrinkling her nose. "By the way, weren"t you on the pill?"
"Did you know antibiotics weaken the effect of the pill?"
Minka nodded. Well, d.a.m.n; apparently everyone had gotten the memo but her.
"What if Adam wants more than just a role in the child"s life?"
Lily"s heart kicked. Only one thing would make her consider permanence and that was the big L-O-V-E word, which was not part of the game she"d been playing with Adam. They had an agreement, and that word wasn"t part of the equation. Nothing serious were the words they both used to describe their relationship.
"What do you mean?" she asked her friend.
"What if he wants a relationship with you?"
"Adam doesn"t do relationships, remember?"
"He"s been with you for a year."
"Just for s.e.x, Minka."
Minka glanced briefly at her. "What about you, is it just the s.e.x for you too?"
The whole thing stopped being s.e.x for her a long time ago. She just never chose to dwell on it. Instead, she carried on and pretended she was not emotionally available, didn"t trust men. Lily brushed away non-existent lint from her jeans and turned her attention to the road.
"Do I need to answer that?"
Really she didn"t have to. Her friend knew her well enough. But to admit, say the words would make everything she felt more tangible.
"No."
With only remnants of the heavy summer traffic, the car slid onto Main Street with ease. Having visited the island on various occasions during the year, she knew after the wine festival, the island would become a ghost town with only the locals staying behind. Even some of the inns would close for the winter or open for a wedding here and there.
She rather enjoyed visiting during the season when there were fewer people around. Adam usually went to Europe for a week or two then stayed on the island. She visited often last winter; a lot of long weekends that should have tired her but instead made her feel alive.
They drove in silence, and for that she was grateful. Lily focused her attention on the road and admired the impressive private homes with sweeping ocean views. Adam"s house in Chillmark was similar in setting. They turned on Beach Road and drove through Oak Bluffs, the town Blake grew up in and probably the trendiest of them all, with a very So-Ho like feel.
A smile settled on her lips as her gaze fixated on Jaws Bridge. The landmark was famous for visitors to jump into the ocean, something she had done several times with Adam. Adrenaline pumped through her veins as she recalled the icy rush of the water, the feel of Adam"s cold flesh slick against her own. She swallowed hard and pushed the memories away. There wasn"t a part of this island that didn"t remind her of him. She needed to get away. Far. Far. Away.
"By the way, Rafa called today."
Lily simply nodded. She already figured out what her brothers were up to. She only wished they didn"t try to ruin her best friend"s wedding. Her stomach turned at the thought.
"Let me guess, suddenly my three brothers are available to attend your wedding."
"He figured it out, huh?"
"And he thinks whoever is responsible for my fall from grace lives here."
Minka let out a soft chuckle. "Very perceptive."
"I won"t let them ruin your wedding day."
Again, Minka waved her hand and dismissed Lily"s concern. "Your brothers would never do that. They"re gentlemen."
The words barely escaped Minka"s lips before the car was filled with laughter. Her brothers were smart, fun, and successful. Some of her friends had even labeled them as s.e.xy. But gentlemen? Nope. Not the Serrano brothers. And if they weren"t the type to kill and ask questions later, Adam would probably fit right in with them.
Adam"s eyes rested on the silhouette outlined by the down comforter. Fast asleep in true Lily sleeping state, the comforter pulled just below her chin. He ignored the immediate tightness in his chest and clenched his teeth. He"d been growing increasingly impatient since he"d received that crazy text. His mind had been spinning since he"d received her last text, he"d been frantic to see her. To feel their connection and make it real again. To find out what was wrong and fix it.
Yet here she was, completely relaxed, sleeping like a baby. As if he didn"t exist at all, as if they"d never existed. Closing the door behind him, he invaded her s.p.a.ce and walked into the bedroom. Now close enough to examine every detail of her face, he noticed a few lines under her eyes. Her usual honey complexion with the permanent glow she seemed to possess was replaced with an unhealthy hue. Adam"s immediate reaction was to run the pad of his thumb against her cheek. He watched her stir.