She nodded, smiling. But, for some reasons vaguely defined, she was heavy-hearted. The city"s endless drama of squalor and pain was all about her; she could not understand, she could not help, she could not even lift her own little problem out of the great total of failures!
All day long the sense of impotence a.s.sailed her.
Wallace was at home, when they came back, heavily asleep across his bed. Martie, with firmly shut lips, helped him into bed, and made the strong coffee for which he longed. After drinking it, he gave her a resentful, painstaking account of his unexpected return. His face was flushed, his voice thick. She gathered that he had lost his position.
"He came right up to me before Young, d"ye see? He put it up to me.
"Nelson," I says, "Nelson, this isn"t a straight deal!" I says. "My stuff is my stuff," I says, "but this is something else again."
"Wallie," he says, "that may be right, too. But listen," he says. I says, "I"m going to do d.a.m.n little listening to you or Young!" I says, "Cut that talk about my missing rehearsals--""
The menacing, appealing voice went on and on. Martie watched him in something far beyond scorn or shame. He had not shaved recently, his face was blotched.
"What else could I do, Mart?" he asked presently. She answered with a long sigh:
"Nothing, I suppose, Wallace."
After a while he slept heavily. The afternoon was bra.s.sy hot. Women manipulated creaking clotheslines across the long double row of backyards; the day died on a long, gasping twilight. Martie let Teddy go to the candy store for ten cents" worth of ice cream for his supper.
She made herself iced tea, and deliberately forced herself to read.
To-night she would not think. After a while she wrote her letter of regret to George Curley.
The situation was far from desperate, after all. Wallace had a headache the next day, but on the day after that he shaved and dressed carefully, a.s.sured his wife that this experience should be the last of its type, and began to look for an engagement. He had some money, and he insisted upon buying her a thin, dark gown, loose and cool. He carried Teddy off for whole afternoons, leaving Martie to doze, read, and rest; and learning that she still had a bank account of something more than three hundred dollars--left from poker games and from her old bank account--she engaged a stupid, good-natured coloured girl to do the heavy work. Isabeau Eato was willing and strong, and for three dollars a week she did an unbelievable amount of drudgery. Martie felt herself fortunate, and listened to the crash of dishes, the running of water, and the swish of Isabeau"s broom with absolute satisfaction.
One broiling afternoon she was trying to read in the darkened dining room. Heat was beating against the prostrate city in metallic waves, but since noon there had been occasional distant flashes toward the west, and faint rumblings that predicted the coming storm. In an hour or two the streets would be awash, and white hats and flimsy gowns flying toward shelter; meanwhile, there was only endurance. She could only breathe the motionless leaden air, smell the dry, stale odours of the house, and listen to the thundering drays and cars in the streets.
Wallace had gone to Yonkers to see a moving picture manager; Isabeau had taken Teddy with her on a trip to the Park. Sitting back in a deep chair, with her back to the dazzling light of the window, Martie closed her book, shut her eyes, and fell into a reverie. Expense, pain, weakness, helplessness; she dreaded them all. She dreaded the doctor, the hospital, the brisk, indifferent nurses; she hated above all the puzzled realization that all this cost to her was so wasted; Wallace was not sorry for the child"s coming, nor was she; that was all. No one was glad. No one praised her for the slow loss of days and nights, for dependence, pain, and care. Her children might live to comfort her; they might not. She had been no particular comfort to her own father--her own mother--
Tears slipped through her closed lids, and for a moment her lips quivered. She struggled half-angrily for self-control, and opened her book.
"Martie?" said a voice from the doorway. She looked up to see John Dryden standing there.
The sight of the familiar crooked smile, and the half-daring, half-bashful eyes, stirred her heart with keen longing; she needed friendship, sympathy, understanding so desperately! She clung eagerly to his hands.
He sat down beside her, and rumpled his hair in furious embarra.s.sment and excitement, studying her with a wistful and puzzled smile. She did not realize how her pale face, loosely ma.s.sed hair, and black-rimmed eyes impressed him.
"John! I am so glad! Tell me everything; how are you, and how"s Adele?"
Adele was well. He was well. His wife"s sister, Mrs. Baker of Browning, Indiana, was visiting them. Things were much the same at the office. He had not been reading anything particularly good.
She laughed at his spa.r.s.e information.
"But, John--talk! Have you been to any lectures lately? What have you been doing?" she demanded.
"I"ve been thinking for days of what we should talk about when we saw each other," he said, laughing excitedly. "But now that I"m here I can"t remember them!"
The sense his presence always gave her, of being at ease, of being happily understood, was enveloping Martie. She was as comfortable with John as she might have been with Sally, as sure of his affection and interest. She suddenly realized that she had missed John of late, without quite knowing what it was she missed.
"You"re going on with your writing, John?"
"Oh"--he rumpled his hair again--"what"s the use?"
"Why, that"s no way to talk. Aren"t you doing ANYTHING?"
"Not much," he grinned boyishly.
"But, John, that"s sheer laziness! How do you ever expect to get out of the groove, if you don"t make a start?"
"Oh, d.a.m.n it all, Martie," he said mildly, with a whimsical smile, "what"s the use? I suppose there isn"t a furniture clerk in the city that doesn"t feel he is fit for great things!"
"You didn"t talk like this last year," Martie said, in disappointment and reproach. John looked at her uneasily, and then said boldly:
"How"s Ted?"
"Sweet." Martie laid one hand on her breast, and drew a short, stifled breath. "Isn"t it fearful?" she said, of the heat.
John nodded absently: she knew him singularly unaffected by anything so trivial as mere heat or cold. He was fingering a magazine carelessly, suddenly he flung it aside.
"I am writing something, of course!" he confessed. "But it seems sort of rotten, to me."
"But I"m glad!" she said, with shining eyes.
"I work at it in the office," John added. "And what is it?"
"You know what it is: you suggested it!"
"_I_ did?"
"You said it would make a good play."
Martie"s thin cheek dimpled, she widened her eyes.
"I don"t remember!"
"It was when I was reading Strickland"s "Queens." You said that this one"s life would make a good play."
"Oh, I do dimly remember!" She knotted her brows. "Mary--Mary Isabelle--an Italian girl?--wasn"t it?"
"Mary Beatrice," he corrected simply.
"Of course! And does it work up pretty well?"
"Fine!"
"How much have you done, John?"
"Oh, not much!"
"Oh, John, for heaven"s sake--you will drive me insane!" she laughed joyously, laying her hand over his. "Tell me about it." She laughed again when he drew some crumpled pages from his pocket. But he was presently garrulous, sketching his plan to her, reading a pa.s.sage here and there, firing her with his own interest and delight. He had as little thought of boring her as she of being bored, they fled together from the noise and heat of the city, and trod the Dover sands, and rode triumphant into the old city of London at the King"s side.
"I"m not a judge--I wish I was," she said finally. "But it seems to me extraordinary!"
He silently folded the sheets, and put them away. Glancing at his face, she saw that its thoughtful look was almost stern. Martie wondered if she had said something to offend him.