Rosemary put the book down, face to face at last with self-knowledge.
She would have torn down the flaming signal, but it was too late. If he were coming--and he never had failed to come--he would be there very soon.
Alden had closed his desk with a sigh as the last pair of restless little feet tumbled down the schoolhouse steps. Sc.r.a.ps of paper littered the floor and the room was musty and close in spite of two open windows. From where he sat, he could see the vineyard, with its perpetual demand upon him. Since his painful interview with his mother, he had shrunk, inwardly, from even the sight of the vineyard. It somehow seemed to have a malicious air about it. Mutely it challenged his manhood, menaced his soul.
[Sidenote: Uneventful Days]
He had accepted the inevitable but had not ceased to rebel. The coming years stretched out before him in a procession of grey, uneventful days.
Breakfast, school, luncheon, school, long evenings spent in reading to his mother, and, from Spring to frost, the vineyard, with its mult.i.tudinous necessities.
He felt, keenly, that his mother did not quite understand him. In fact, n.o.body did, unless it was Rosemary, whom he had not seen for weeks.
Brave little Rosemary, for whom life consisted wholly of deprivations!
How seldom she complained and how often she had soothed his discontent!
It was three years ago that she had come shyly to the schoolhouse and asked if she might borrow a book. He had known her, of course, before that, but had scarcely exchanged a dozen words with her. When he saw her, rarely, at church, Grandmother or Aunt Matilda was always with her, and the Starrs had had nothing to do with the Marshs for several years past, as Mrs. Marsh had been remiss in her social obligations.
[Sidenote: A Growing Interest]
At first, Rosemary had been purely negative to him, and he regarded her with kindly indifference. The girl"s personality seemed as ashen as her hair, as colourless as her face. Her dull eyes seemed to see nothing, to care for nothing. Within the last few months he had begun to wonder whether her cold and impa.s.sive exterior might not be the shield with which she protected an abnormal sensitiveness. Now and then he had longed to awaken the woman who dwelt securely within the forbidding fortress--to strike from the flint some stray gleams of soul.
Of late he had begun to miss her, and, each afternoon, to look with a little more conscious eagerness for the scarlet thread on the hill-top signalling against the grey sky beyond. His interest in her welfare was becoming more surely personal, not merely human. During the Winter, though he had seen her only twice, he had thought about her a great deal, and had written to her several times without expecting an answer.
The iron bars of circ.u.mstance which bound her, had, though less narrowly, imprisoned him also. It seemed permanent for them both, and, indeed, the way of escape was even more definitely closed for Rosemary than for him.
[Sidenote: A New Rosemary]
He sighed as he rose and brushed the chalk from his clothes. Through force of habit, he looked up to the crest of the Hill of the Muses as he locked the door. The red ribbon fluttered like an oriflamme against the blue-and-white of the April sky. His heart quickened its beat a little as he saw it, and his steps insensibly hastened as he began to climb the hill.
When he took her hand, with a word of friendly greeting, he noticed a change in her, though she had made a valiant effort to recover her composure. This was a new Rosemary, with eyes shining and the colour flaming in her cheeks and lips.
"Spring seems to have come to you, too," he said, seating himself on the log beside her. "How well you look!"
The deep crimson mounted to her temples, then as swiftly retreated.
"Better take down the ribbon," she suggested, practically.
"I"ve been watching a long time for this," he resumed, as he folded it and restored it to its place in the hollow tree. "What have you been doing?"
"All the usual dreary things, to which a mountain of sewing has been added."
"Is that a new gown?"
She laughed, mirthlessly. "It"s as new a gown as I"ll ever have," she returned, trying to keep her voice even. "My wardrobe consists of an endless parade of brown alpaca and brown gingham garments, all made exactly alike."
[Sidenote: Thwarted on All Sides]
"Like a dozen stage soldiers, marching in and out, to create the illusion of a procession?"
"I suppose so. You know I"ve never seen a stage, much less a stage soldier."
Alden"s heart softened with pity. He longed to take Rosemary to town and let her feast her eyes upon some gorgeous spectacle; to see her senses run riot, for once, with colour and light and sound.
"I feel sometimes," she was saying, "as though I had sold my soul for pretty things in some previous existence, and was paying the penalty for it now."
"You love pretty things, don"t you?"
She turned br.i.m.m.i.n.g eyes toward him. "Love them?" she repeated, brokenly. "There aren"t words enough to say how much!"
From a fresh point of view he saw her countless deprivations, binding her, thwarting her, oppressing her on all sides by continual denial. His own rebellion against circ.u.mstances seemed weak and unworthy.
"Whenever I think of you," he said, in a different tone, "I feel ashamed of myself. I have freedom, of a certain sort, and you"ve never had a chance to learn the meaning of the word. You"re dominated, body and soul, by a couple of old women who haven"t discovered, as yet, that the earth is round and not flat."
[Sidenote: Freedom]
"My soul isn"t bound," returned Rosemary, softly, "but it would have been, if it hadn"t been for you."
"I? Why, my dear girl, what have I done?"
"Everything. Think of all the books you"ve loaned me, all the candles you"ve given me--all the times you"ve climbed this steep hill just to talk to me for an hour and give me new strength to go on."
"It"s only selfishness, Rosemary. I knew you were here and I like to talk to you. Don"t forget that you"ve meant something to me, too. Why, you"re the only woman I know, except my mother."
"Your mother is lovely," she returned. "I wish I could go to see her once in a while. I like to look at her. Even her voice is different someway."
"Yes, mother is "different,"" he agreed, idly. "It"s astonishing, sometimes, how "different" she manages to be. We had it out the other day, about the vineyard, and I"m to stay here--all the rest of my life,"
he concluded bitterly.
"I don"t see why, if you don"t want to," she answered, half-fearfully.
"You"re a man, and men can do as they please."
"It probably seems so to you, but I a.s.sure you it"s very far from the truth. I wonder, now and then, if any of us ever really do as we please.
Freedom is the great gift."
[Sidenote: Choosing]
"And the great loneliness," she added, after a pause.
"You may be right," he sighed. "Still, I"d like to try it for a while.
It"s the one thing I"d choose. What would you take, if you could have anything you wanted?"
"Do you mean for just a little while, or for always?"
"For always. The one great gift you"d choose from all that Life has to give."
"I"d take love," she said, in a low tone. She was not looking at him now, but far across the valley where the vineyard lay. Her face was wistful in the half-light; the corners of her mouth quivered, ever so little.
Alden looked at her, then rubbed his eyes and looked at her again. In some subtle way she had changed, or he had, since they last met. Never before had he thought of her as a woman; she had been merely another individual to whom he liked to talk. To-day her womanhood carried its own appeal. She was not beautiful and no one would ever think her so, but she was sweet and wholesome and had a new, indefinable freshness about her that, in another woman, would have been called charm.