The question was so out of the blue that for few seconds my head stopped working. Why I chose Robbie? Because I loved him, I bonded to him because I wanted him to be a part of my life but of course never did I thought such a twist would happen in my life. And the reason I couldn"t chose Fred, even though, he loved me so much was because I didn"t want to hurt him. I couldn"t reciprocate his feelings and I felt it was unfair to be with him when I don"t feel the same for him. I felt he deserved better. But how do I explain all this to Tanya?She was looking at me with wide curious eyes like a kid. I sighed as I arranged my thoughts,
"Why do you ask? In fact, why do you even think Fred had anything for me?" I asked Tanya trying to change the topic
"Because I am not blind" Tanya laughed lightly, "I could see how Mr. D"Souza looks at you and how his eyes are always following you just like our CEO. You are lucky Tony to have two people who are so in love with you" Tanya said in a slightly bitter tone.
After hearing everything about Tanya and her past, I could understand where she was coming from. Everyone in this world wants to be loved. I was no exception and nor was Tanya. While Tanya might feel bitter about me being loved by two guys, I feel bitter that Tanya could have her parent"s love even after being tested Omega. It had been thirteen years since I was abandoned. I didn"t even have my parents or my siblings picture with me. I was starting to forget their faces. I know this empty s.p.a.ce of my life could never be filled as parents can"t be replaced. But Tanya could fill her emptiness in life.
"Are you jealous?" I asked her jokingly trying to lighten the mood, afterall, it was her birthday I didn"t want to spoil it.
"A little I guess" she answered, laughing sheepishly, "So was it because of the bonding with our CEO that you chose him?"
It looked like Tanya was not ready to let go of this topic. I smiled at her and said shortly,
"I couldn"t reciprocate Fred"s feelings"
Tanya blinked in surprise, "Didn"t you think of the possibility that you might start loving him if you spent more time with him?"
"I did but I didn"t want to risk Fred"s entire life"s happiness over my future uncertain feelings. My bonding with Robbie was another reason" I answered, looking at Twen, but not really looking at him
"I told you this before but you are too good for your own good Tony!" Tanya sighed, "What about your happiness? What about Twen? Did you really wanted to spend your entire life alone?"
I burst out laughing. I have thought about it several times but always ended up getting headache so I thought I"ll face the future as it comes. Worrying about ending up lonely, wouldn"t just magically make a guy appear in front of me who I can love.
"How can I be alone when I have Twen?" I said, partially lying, "The only thing I was worried about was Twen being deprived of his father"s love! It"s no easy task being a single parent!"
Tanya came to me and held my hand in hers as she said affectionately, "If there was no one, I would have filled in as another parent"
I looked at her wide eyed. I was not sure what she was trying to say but it sounded like a confession to me. Was I thinking too much?
"I know you are overthinking Tony" Tanya said, a playful smile spreading on her face, "You are so transperant that even a kid would know what your thinking" she laughed throwing her back before continuing through her laughter, "I am not saying I would have married you, I am saying as your friend I could have simply helped you take care of Twen as another parent"
I wanted to hit myself. What am I thinking? Of course, Tanya meant in a friendly way. I am such an over thinker. I quickly murmured a "sorry" to her but she waved it off saying it was also her fault for phrasing it in such a way. She let go of my hand and went to sit on the bed. She stretched her hand and gently messaged Twen"s forehead, continuing to speak
"I could tell that both CEO and Mr. D"Souza truly love you but I think it is our CEO who needs you more!"
I was smiling at her messaging Twen"s head when her words made me crease my brow,
"Need me? I am not getting you"
Tanya looked at me, her face showed a mix of thoughtfulness and serious expression, "Yes. Dad once told me that there were will be several people who would l.u.s.t for you, very few who would love you but only one who would find their home in you. I think our CEO has found his in you"
I was dumbfounded. What does she mean found his home? I looked at her blankly. She too looked at me tilting her head with a smile. She continued,
"I am sure you didn"t get it. I was just as blank as you when dad told it to me. But now I know what he meant! Have you heard that a person feels most protected, happy and comfortable in their home?"
I nodded trying to understand where this was going.
"Similarly, our CEO feels most protected, happy and comfortable when he is with you. That is he had found his home in you" Tanya said smiling at me
"Wh-what made you think so?" I said turning magenta.
Tanya laughed seeing my expression. She shrugged and said vaguely, "I am not sure but he seems like a different person with you. When he is with you, he looks so relaxed, happy and peaceful, as if he had no worries in the world, like being in our house, our most comfortable zone!"