""Of course," the nurse said, smiling. "He"ll be waiting right outside the room in which you"re having the baby. You"ll see him as soon as you come out."
They moved the gumey out into the hall and Daniel walked alongside, still holding Tess"s hand. In the elevator going up, she looked up at him. "I feel funny," she said. "Like I"m floating, dizzy-like."
"That^s normal," the nurse rea.s.sured her. "It"s the Pentothal. Don"t fight it. Just relax and drift with it. Its just like sleeping. And when you wake up you"ll be a mother."
They came out of the elevator and went down another corridor. The nurse stopped the gurney in front of the operating room. "Here"s where we leave you," she said to Daniel. "There"s a waiting room just at the end of the hall. The doctor will see you there afterward."
Tess turned her face toward him. "Promise me, Daniel. If anythin" happens to me. That you"ll take care of the baby."
"Nothing will happen to you."
Her voice was insistent. "Promise me."
"I promise," he said.
She seemed to relax. "I love you. You won"t forget that, will you?"
"Just you don"t forget that I love you," he said. He bent over the gumey and kissed her. He watched them push the gumey through the swinging doors, then went down the corridor to the waiting room.
It seemed longer, but it was less than an hour later that the doctor came into the waiting room. He held out his hand, smiling. "Congratulations, Mr. Huggins. You have a son. A big boy, like yourself. Ten pounds four ounces."
Daniel grinned, shaking the doctor"s hand enthusiastically. ""I can"t believe it."
""You"ll believe it when you see him," the doctor said, smiling.
""And Tess-is she okay?"
"Just fine," the doctor said. "She"s in the recovery room right now. She should be back downstairs in about two hours. That will give you time to go out and get ^ box of cigars and make a few calls. When you come back, you"ll be able to see the two of them."
Daniel let out a deep breath. "Thank you, Doctor."
He crossed the street in front of the hospital to the restaurant and bar on the opposite comer. No one was in the place when he entered except the man behind the bar, who was busy polishing gla.s.ses. Daniel stepped up to the bar. "Double Jack Daniels straight, water back."
Expertly the bartender poured the whiskey and placed it in front of him. With his other hand he brought a gla.s.s of water up from beneath the bar. "What was it?" he asked. "A boy or a girl?"
"A boy." Daniel stared at him. "How did you know?"
The bartender laughejd. "The only customers we get here at nine o"clock in the morning are from the hospital across the street." His hand went down behind the bar and came up with a cigar. "Congratulations. Compliments of the management."
"Thank you." Daniel looked at the cigar. It had a gold-imprinted wrapper. IT"S A BOY!
"We also sell them by the box of twenty-five," the bartender said. "Two dollars."
"I"ll take a box," Daniel said. "And let me buy you a drink,"
The bartender grinned at him. "I make it a rule never to take a drink before twelve o"clock. But this time I"ll make an exception. I"m from New York, any- way, and it"s twelve there already." He poured himself a shot and put the box of cigars on the bar all in the same motion. ""What"s the kid"s name?"
""Daniel. Daniel B. Huggins, Junior."
The bartender raised his gla.s.s. "Here"s to him."
They put away their drinks. Daniel ordered a refill. He drank half, then chased it down with some water.
"If you want to make any calls," the bartender said, "there"s a phone booth in the comer."
Daniel looked down the room, then shook his head. "I"ve got time," he said, picking up his gla.s.s. "Give me another. You have one too."
The bartender shook his head. "No, thanks, Mr. Huggins. I still have another eight hours to go. If I begin putting them away now, FU never make it through lunch hour."
Daniel nodded. He pulled the wrapper off the cigar and lit it. He blew a cloud of smoke toward the ceiling. It wasn"t bad. "Good cigar."
"The kitchen"s open if you"d like some breakfast," the bartender said.
Suddenly, Daniel realized he was famished. "Steak and eggs with hash browns."
The bartender smiled and turned, yelling, toward the kitchen in the back. "Hey, Charlie! Getcha a.s.s out here and set a table. We got a live one."
He bought a bouquet of spring flowers on the way back to the hospital. The door was closed as he came down the corridor. Cautiously he turned the k.n.o.b and opened it.
Tess was lying in the bed, propped up by the pillows behind her. She had already put on some makeup and lipstick, but her skin seemed pale and almost translucent beneath it. Her eyes were closed and she seemed to be resting, not paying attention to the nurse on the other side of the bed who was straightening the sheets.
He tiptoed quietly across the. room and stood at the side of the bed, looking down at her. She opened her eyes. He smiled, holding the flowers toward her. "Congratulations, Mother."
She looked at the flowers. "They"re beautiful," she said. Her voice seemed to have no strength.
He kissed her. "How do you feel?"
"Okay," she said. "Weak. I can"t catch my breath. It"s like there"s a band across my chest."
"You"ll be all right after you get some rest," the nurse said. "Sometimes the bandages we have around your abdomen make you feel like that." She turned to Daniel. "I"ll put the flowers in a vase for you, Mr. Huggins."
Daniel gave her the flowers, and they watched as she took a vase from the closet, filled it with water from the sink and arranged the flowers in it.
"Did you see the baby yet?" Tess asked.
"No," Daniel answered. "Did you?"
She shook her head.
"The doctor said he"s a big one," Daniel said. "Ten pounds four ounces."
"My brothers were all ten pounds or more," Tess said. She looked at the nurse. "Can we?"
The nurse smiled. "That"s just what I was about to do. I"ll be back with your son in just a minute." She closed the door behind her.
Daniel pulled a chair to the side of the bed and took her hand. "I bought a box of cigars. Look." He held one up. "See the band? It says, "It"s a boy." "
She smiled wanly. "Were you here this momin" before I went upstairs?"
"Of course I was-don"t you remember? I even walked you upstairs to the operating room."
"I thought maybe you did, but everything was so fuzzy. They gave me a shot before I went upstairs and I don"t remember too good." She looked at him cautiously. "Did I say anything bad?"
He shook his head. "No. Only that you loved me. Maybe you think that was bad."
"That was good." She pressed his hand. ""I do love you. You"ve always been so good to me."
He laughed. ""You didn"t treat me too bad either."
The door behind him opened and the nurse came in carrying the baby, all covered with a blanket. She went around the bed across from Daniel. She lifted the cover from the baby"s head and held the infant toward Tess. "Mrs. Huggins, your son."
Wonderingly, Tess took the baby. Gingerly, she moved him close to her and peered into his tiny face. She looked up at Daniel, a radiant smile on her face. "Oh, Daniel, he"s so beautiful. He looks just like ..."
A sudden agony contorted her face. "Daniel!" she screamed. "Oh, my G.o.d!" The baby began to slip from her nerveless fingers, and Daniel caught it just as she slumped back against the pillows, a light froth bubbling from her mouth. She turned to look at him, her eyes bright and staring. Her lips moved as if she were trying to speak. Then her eyes went blank and her face fell sideways on the pillow, her eyes staring into eternity, her mouth open with the words she would never speak.
The nurse tore around the bed to his side, roughly pushing him out of the way as she hit a b.u.t.ton on the wall. A bell began to ring in the hall outside the room. A moment later the room was filled with nurses and doctors; oxygen tanks were being rolled in with other machinery.
Daniel stood against the wall, watching them for a moment. The niirse looked up, catching his eye for a : moment. He shook his head. "It won"t do any good,"
he said to no one in particular in a flat voice. "She"s gone."
Then gently he hid the baby"s face in the blanket. "Come, my son," he said, carrying the child with him into the hall.
on which the coffin had been resting, then began to lower it into the open grave until it settled with a ^quishy sound on the already water-soaked bottom. They reached for the shovels.
"I"ll do it," Daniel said, stepping forward. In answer to the questioning looks: "Back home, we always buried our own."
Silently, they stepped back and watched him. The feel of the shovel was good in his hands; it took him back in time. He was just a boy, and the mines were dark. He looked into the grave as the first shovelful of dirt fell upon the coffin and scattered over the flowers lying upon its closed cover. Soon she too would be covered by the dark. The rhythm picked up. The earth was rain-soaked and heavy, and soon he felt the sweat coming up under his clothing and with it a sense of lightness and strength. Suddenly he was once again together with the earth. Then, almost before he knew it, it was over, the earth lying neatly in a mound over the grave.
He handed the shovel to one of the men. *"Thank you," he said. The man nodded without answeiing.
The minister walked back to the car with him. At the door of the car Daniel stopped and took a twenty-dollar bill from his pocket.
""You don"t have to do that," the minister said. "Forest Lawn has already included my services."
"Take it anyway," Daniel said. "I"m sure that someone in your parish could use the help."
"Thank you," the minister said. Daniel got behind the wheel of the car. "Don"t be bitter, my son," he said.
"I"m not bitter, Reverend," Daniel answered, starting the engine. "Death and I are not strangers. Nor will we ever be."
He had to pull around the big black limousine parked against the curb in order to get into the drive- way between his house and the next. He glanced at the chauffeur sitting imperturbably behind the wheel of the limousine, then ran through the rain to his open doorway.
There were neatly closed and tied cardboard boxes in the living room, stacked as if awaiting pickup. He walked through the empty room to the bedroom. Chris was there together with another woman-middle-aged, heavy set, with blond hair pulled neatly back on her head in a bun. They turned as they heard his footsteps.
Chris"s voice was without surprise. "There"s afresh bottle of bourbon on the table," she said. "Help yourself to a drink. We"ll be through here in a minute."
He looked at her for a moment, his eyes falling to the open drawer of the dresser and the cardboard box next to it. The last bits and pieces of Tess"s clothing were being packed. Without speaking, he went back into the living room.
When she came into the room, he was standing at the window, staring into the rain, half-empty gla.s.s of whiskey in his hand. "Someone had to do it," she said.
"You know, it was raining the first day we came to California," he said. He turned to look at her. "Seems only fitting it"s raining now."
"The Goodwill truck should be here in about a half-hour to pick up the things," she said. "I"ve also ordered some new furniture for the baby"s room and a new convertible couch for the living room, one that turns into abed."
"I was the only one at the cemetery," he said. "I never knew any of the friends she made while she was working, so I didn"t know whom to call. I never knew where any of her family back home were either."
"The painters will be here first thing in the morning. They said they"ll need only a day. The new furniture will be delivered the day after."
"She had n.o.body but me," he said.
"" Daniel," she said sharply.
He looked at her.
"She had a son. Your son. But now she"s gone and there"s nothing that can be done about it. So get off it. You have a responsibility toward your son and you have to plan for it."
There was pain in his eyes. "I"m scared. I don"t know where to begin."
"I"ll help you," she said. "That"s why I had Mrs. Torgersen come out here."
"Mrs. Torgersen?"
"The woman in there. She"s an experienced baby nurse and nanny. She will take care of the child for you."
He looked at her with a growing respect. "Chris."
She smiled.
"Thank you."
She stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek. "I love you. And that"s more than just f.u.c.king."
He looked into her eyes for a moment, then nodded slowly. "I"m learning." He reached for the bottle and poured more whiskey into his gla.s.s. "But I have other problems. I don"t know whether I can afford all this. I may have to take the job out here that Bioff and Browne offered me."
"But you said they were crooks."
"That doesn"t mean I have to be one."
"You know better than that," she said. "At least be honest with yourself. If you"re going to jump the fence, jump clean over it. Take a job with Uncle Tom. Don"t climb halfway up and try to straddle it."
"Maybe I"d be better off if I brought the baby back East with me."
"Don"t be stupid," she said. "What will you do? Keep the baby in a suitcase? And how will you take care of him?"
He didn"t answer.
"You have a perfectly good home here, and it"s a comfortable place for a child to grow up. And the way you move around, there"s no way for you to take care of the child. The best thing for you to do is go with Mrs. Torgersen. She"s got the experience to deal with all the things you know nothing about. She took care of my sister"s kids for years."