When he starts away the first thing in the morning, he takes a bit of cold meat and a piece of bread with him for his dinner; and generally he has to eat it in the shed, for he mustn"t leave his engine. You can understand how the jolting and shaking knocks a man up, after a bit. The insurance companies won"t take us at ordinary rates. We"re obliged to be Foresters, or Old Friends, or that sort of thing, where they ain"t so particular. The wages of a engine-driver average about eight shillings a day, but if he"s a good schemer with his coals-yes, I mean if he economises his coals-he"s allowed so much more. Some will make from five to ten shillings a week that way. I don"t complain of the wages particular; but it"s hard lines for such as us, to have to pay income-tax. The company gives an account of all our wages, and we have to pay. It"s a shame.
"Our domestic life-our life at home, you mean? Well, as to that, we don"t see much of our families. I leave home at half-past seven in the morning, and don"t get back again until half-past nine, or maybe later.
The children are not up when I leave, and they"ve gone to bed again before I come home. This is about my day:-Leave London at 8.45; drive for four hours and a half; cold snack on the engine step; see to engine; drive back again; clean engine; report myself; and home. Twelve hours"
hard and anxious work, and no comfortable victuals. Yes, our wives are anxious about us; for we never know when we go out, if we"ll ever come back again. We ought to go home the minute we leave the station, and report ourselves to those that are thinking on us and depending on us; but I"m afraid we don"t always. Perhaps we go first to the public-house, and perhaps you would, too, if you were in charge of a engine all day long. But the wives have a way of their own, of finding out if we"re all right. They inquire among each other. "Have you seen my Jim?" one says.
"No," says another, "but Jack see him coming out of the station half an hour ago." Then she knows that her Jim"s all right, and knows where to find him if she wants him. It"s a sad thing when any of us have to carry bad news to a mate"s wife. None of us likes that job. I remember when Jack Davidge was killed, none of us could face his poor missus with the news. She had seven children, poor thing, and two of "em, the youngest, was down with the fever. We got old Mrs. Berridge-Tom Berridge"s mother-to break it to her. But she knew summat was the matter, the minute the old woman went in, and, afore she spoke a word, fell down like as if she was dead. She lay all night like that, and never heard from mortal lips until next morning that her Jack was killed. But she knew it in her heart. It"s a pitch and toss kind of a life ours!
"And yet I never was nervous on a engine but once. I never think of my own life. You go in for staking that, when you begin, and you get used to the risk. I never think of the pa.s.sengers either. The thoughts of a engine-driver never go behind his engine. If he keeps his engine all right, the coaches behind will be all right, as far as the driver is concerned. But once I _did_ think of the pa.s.sengers. My little boy, Bill, was among them that morning. He was a poor little cripple fellow that we all loved more nor the others, because he _was_ a cripple, and so quiet, and wise-like. He was going down to his aunt in the country, who was to take care of him for a while. We thought the country air would do him good. I did think there were lives behind me that morning; at least, I thought hard of one little life that was in my hands. There were twenty coaches on; my little Bill seemed to me to be in every one of "em.
My hand trembled as I turned on the steam. I felt my heart thumping as we drew close to the pointsman"s box; as we neared the Junction, I was all in a cold sweat. At the end of the first fifty miles I was nearly eleven minutes behind time. "What"s the matter with you this morning?"
my stoker said. "Did you have a drop too much last night?" "Don"t speak to me, Fred," I said, "till we get to Peterborough; and keep a sharp look-out, there"s a good fellow." I never was so thankful in my life as when I shut off steam to enter the station at Peterborough. Little Bill"s aunt was waiting for him, and I saw her lift him out of the carriage. I called out to her to bring him to me, and I took him upon the engine and kissed him-ah, twenty times I should think-making him in such a mess with grease and coal-dust as you never saw.
"I was all right for the rest of the journey. And I do believe, sir, the pa.s.sengers were safer after little Bill was gone. It would never do, you see, for engine-drivers to know too much, or to feel too much."
NO. 3 BRANCH LINE THE COMPENSATION HOUSE
"There"s not a looking-gla.s.s in all the house, sir. It"s some peculiar fancy of my master"s. There isn"t one in any single room in the house."
It was a dark and gloomy-looking building, and had been purchased by this Company for an enlargement of their Goods Station. The value of the house had been referred to what was popularly called "a compensation jury," and the house was called, in consequence, The Compensation House.
It had become the Company"s property; but its tenant still remained in possession, pending the commencement of active building operations. My attention was originally drawn to this house because it stood directly in front of a collection of huge pieces of timber which lay near this part of the Line, and on which I sometimes sat for half an hour at a time, when I was tired by my wanderings about Mugby Junction.
It was square, cold, grey-looking, built of rough-hewn stone, and roofed with thin slabs of the same material. Its windows were few in number, and very small for the size of the building. In the great blank, grey broad-side, there were only four windows. The entrance-door was in the middle of the house; there was a window on either side of it, and there were two more in the single story above. The blinds were all closely drawn, and, when the door was shut, the dreary building gave no sign of life or occupation.
But the door was not always shut. Sometimes it was opened from within, with a great jingling of bolts and door-chains, and then a man would come forward and stand upon the door-step, snuffing the air as one might do who was ordinarily kept on rather a small allowance of that element. He was stout, thick-set, and perhaps fifty or sixty years old-a man whose hair was cut exceedingly close, who wore a large bushy beard, and whose eye had a sociable twinkle in it which was prepossessing. He was dressed, whenever I saw him, in a greenish-brown frock-coat made of some material which was not cloth, wore a waistcoat and trousers of light colour, and had a frill to his shirt-an ornament, by the way, which did not seem to go at all well with the beard, which was continually in contact with it. It was the custom of this worthy person, after standing for a short time on the threshold inhaling the air, to come forward into the road, and, after glancing at one of the upper windows in a half mechanical way, to cross over to the logs, and, leaning over the fence which guarded the railway, to look up and down the Line (it pa.s.sed before the house) with the air of a man accomplishing a self-imposed task of which nothing was expected to come. This done, he would cross the road again, and turning on the threshold to take a final sniff of air, disappeared once more within the house, bolting and chaining the door again as if there were no probability of its being reopened for at least a week. Yet half an hour had not pa.s.sed before he was out in the road again, sniffing the air and looking up and down the Line as before.
It was not very long before I managed to sc.r.a.pe acquaintance with this restless personage. I soon found out that my friend with the shirt-frill was the confidential servant, butler, valet, factotum, what you will, of a sick gentleman, a Mr. Oswald Strange, who had recently come to inhabit the house opposite, and concerning whose history my new acquaintance, whose name I ascertained was Masey, seemed disposed to be somewhat communicative. His master, it appeared, had come down to this place, partly for the sake of reducing his establishment-not, Mr. Masey was swift to inform me, on economical principles, but because the poor gentleman, for particular reasons, wished to have few dependents about him-partly in order that he might be near his old friend, Dr. Garden, who was established in the neighbourhood, and whose society and advice were necessary to Mr. Strange"s life. That life was, it appeared, held by this suffering gentleman on a precarious tenure. It was ebbing away fast with each pa.s.sing hour. The servant already spoke of his master in the past tense, describing him to me as a young gentleman not more than five-and-thirty years of age, with a young face, as far as the features and build of it went, but with an expression which had nothing of youth about it. This was the great peculiarity of the man. At a distance he looked younger than he was by many years, and strangers, at the time when he had been used to get about, always took him for a man of seven or eight-and-twenty, but they changed their minds on getting nearer to him.
Old Masey had a way of his own of summing up the peculiarities of his master, repeating twenty times over: "Sir, he was Strange by name, and Strange by nature, and Strange to look at into the bargain."
It was during my second or third interview with the old fellow that he uttered the words quoted at the beginning of this plain narrative.
"Not such a thing as a looking-gla.s.s in all the house," the old man said, standing beside my piece of timber, and looking across reflectively at the house opposite. "Not one."
"In the sitting-rooms, I suppose you mean?"
"No, sir, I mean sitting-rooms and bedrooms both; there isn"t so much as a shaving-gla.s.s as big as the palm of your hand anywhere."
"But how is it?" I asked. "Why are there no looking-gla.s.ses in any of the rooms?"
"Ah, sir!" replied Masey, "that"s what none of us can ever tell. There is the mystery. It"s just a fancy on the part of my master. He had some strange fancies, and this was one of them. A pleasant gentleman he was to live with, as any servant could desire. A liberal gentleman, and one who gave but little trouble; always ready with a kind word, and a kind deed, too, for the matter of that. There was not a house in all the parish of St. George"s (in which we lived before we came down here) where the servants had more holidays or a better table kept; but, for all that, he had his queer ways and his fancies, as I may call them, and this was one of them. And the point he made of it, sir," the old man went on; "the extent to which that regulation was enforced, whenever a new servant was engaged; and the changes in the establishment it occasioned. In hiring a new servant, the very first stipulation made, was that about the looking-gla.s.ses. It was one of my duties to explain the thing, as far as it could be explained, before any servant was taken into the house.
"You"ll find it an easy place," I used to say, "with a liberal table, good wages, and a deal of leisure; but there"s one thing you must make up your mind to; you must do without looking-gla.s.ses while you"re here, for there isn"t one in the house, and, what"s more, there never will be.""
"But how did you know there never would be one?" I asked.
"Lor" bless you, sir! If you"d seen and heard all that I"d seen and heard, you could have no doubt about it. Why, only to take one instance:-I remember a particular day when my master had occasion to go into the housekeeper"s room where the cook lived, to see about some alterations that were making, and when a pretty scene took place. The cook-she was a very ugly woman, and awful vain-had left a little bit of looking-gla.s.s, about six inches square, upon the chimney-piece; she had got it _surreptious_, and kept it always locked up; but she"d left it out, being called away suddenly, while t.i.tivating her hair. I had seen the gla.s.s, and was making for the chimney-piece as fast as I could; but master came in front of it before I could get there, and it was all over in a moment. He gave one long piercing look into it, turned deadly pale, and seizing the gla.s.s, dashed it into a hundred pieces on the floor, and then stamped upon the fragments and ground them into powder with his feet. He shut himself up for the rest of that day in his own room, first ordering me to discharge the cook, then and there, at a moment"s notice."
"What an extraordinary thing!" I said, pondering.
"Ah, sir," continued the old man, "it was astonishing what trouble I had with those women-servants. It was difficult to get any that would take the place at all under the circ.u.mstances. "What not so much as a mossul to do one"s "air at?" they would say, and they"d go off, in spite of extra wages. Then those who did consent to come, what lies they would tell, to be sure! They would protest that they didn"t want to look in the gla.s.s, that they never had been in the habit of looking in the gla.s.s, and all the while that very wench would have her looking-gla.s.s of some kind or another, hid away among her clothes up-stairs. Sooner or later, she would bring it out too, and leave it about somewhere or other (just like the cook), where it was as likely as not that master might see it.
And then-for girls like that have no consciences, sir-when I had caught one of "em at it, she"d turn round as bold as bra.s.s, "And how am I to know whether my "air"s parted straight?" she"d say, just as if it hadn"t been considered in her wages that that was the very thing which she never _was_ to know while she lived in our house. A vain lot, sir, and the ugly ones always the vainest. There was no end to their dodges. They"d have looking-gla.s.ses in the interiors of their workbox-lids, where it was next to impossible that I could find "em, or inside the covers of hymn-books, or cookery-books, or in their caddies. I recollect one girl, a sly one she was, and marked with the small-pox terrible, who was always reading her prayer-book at odd times. Sometimes I used to think what a religious mind she"d got, and at other times (depending on the mood I was in) I would conclude that it was the marriage-service she was studying; but one day, when I got behind her to satisfy my doubts-lo and behold! it was the old story: a bit of gla.s.s, without a frame, fastened into the kiver with the outside edges of the sheets of postage-stamps. Dodges!
Why they"d keep their looking-gla.s.ses in the scullery or the coal-cellar, or leave them in charge of the servants next door, or with the milk-woman round the corner; but have "em they would. And I don"t mind confessing, sir," said the old man, bringing his long speech to an end, "that it _was_ an inconveniency not to have so much as a sc.r.a.p to shave before. I used to go to the barber"s at first, but I soon gave that up, and took to wearing my beard as my master did; likewise to keeping my hair"-Mr. Masey touched his head as he spoke-"so short, that it didn"t require any parting, before or behind."
I sat for some time lost in amazement, and staring at my companion. My curiosity was powerfully stimulated, and the desire to learn more was very strong within me.
"Had your master any personal defect," I inquired, "which might have made it distressing to him to see his own image reflected?"
"By no means, sir," said the old man. "He was as handsome a gentleman as you would wish to see: a little delicate-looking and careworn, perhaps, with a very pale face; but as free from any deformity as you or I, sir.
No, sir, no; it was nothing of that."
"Then what was it? What is it?" I asked, desperately. "Is there no one who is, or has been, in your master"s confidence?"
"Yes, sir," said the old fellow, with his eyes turning to that window opposite. "There is one person who knows all my master"s secrets, and this secret among the rest."
"And who is that?"
The old man turned round and looked at me fixedly. "The doctor here," he said. "Dr. Garden. My master"s very old friend."
"I should like to speak with this gentleman," I said, involuntarily.
"He is with my master now," answered Masey. "He will be coming out presently, and I think I may say he will answer any question you may like to put to him." As the old man spoke, the door of the house opened, and a middle-aged gentleman, who was tall and thin, but who lost something of his height by a habit of stooping, appeared on the step. Old Masey left me in a moment. He muttered something about taking the doctor"s directions, and hastened across the road. The tall gentleman spoke to him for a minute or two very seriously, probably about the patient up-stairs, and it then seemed to me from their gestures that I myself was the subject of some further conversation between them. At all events, when old Masey retired into the house, the doctor came across to where I was standing, and addressed me with a very agreeable smile.
"John Masey tells me that you are interested in the case of my poor friend, sir. I am now going back to my house, and if you don"t mind the trouble of walking with me, I shall be happy to enlighten you as far as I am able."
I hastened to make my apologies and express my acknowledgments, and we set off together. When we had reached the doctor"s house and were seated in his study, I ventured to inquire after the health of this poor gentleman.
"I am afraid there is no amendment, nor any prospect of amendment," said the doctor. "Old Masey has told you something of his strange condition, has he not?"
"Yes, he has told me something," I answered, "and he says you know all about it."
Dr. Garden looked very grave. "I don"t know all about it. I only know what happens when he comes into the presence of a looking-gla.s.s. But as to the circ.u.mstances which have led to his being haunted in the strangest fashion that I ever heard of, I know no more of them than you do."
"Haunted?" I repeated. "And in the strangest fashion that you ever heard of?"
Dr. Garden smiled at my eagerness, seemed to be collecting his thoughts, and presently went on:
"I made the acquaintance of Mr. Oswald Strange in a curious way. It was on board of an Italian steamer, bound from Civita Vecchia to Ma.r.s.eilles.
We had been travelling all night. In the morning I was shaving myself in the cabin, when suddenly this man came behind me, glanced for a moment into the small mirror before which I was standing, and then, without a word of warning, tore it from the nail, and dashed it to pieces at my feet. His face was at first livid with pa.s.sion-it seemed to me rather the pa.s.sion of fear than of anger-but it changed after a moment, and he seemed ashamed of what he had done. Well," continued the doctor, relapsing for a moment into a smile, "of course I was in a devil of a rage. I was operating on my under-jaw, and the start the thing gave me caused me to cut myself. Besides, altogether it seemed an outrageous and insolent thing, and I gave it to poor Strange in a style of language which I am sorry to think of now, but which, I hope, was excusable at the time. As to the offender himself, his confusion and regret, now that his pa.s.sion was at an end, disarmed me. He sent for the steward, and paid most liberally for the damage done to the steam-boat property, explaining to him, and to some other pa.s.sengers who were present in the cabin, that what had happened had been accidental. For me, however, he had another explanation. Perhaps he felt that I must know it to have been no accident-perhaps he really wished to confide in some one. At all events, he owned to me that what he had done was done under the influence of an uncontrollable impulse-a seizure which took him, he said, at times-something like a fit. He begged my pardon, and entreated that I would endeavour to disa.s.sociate him personally from this action, of which he was heartily ashamed. Then he attempted a sickly joke, poor fellow, about his wearing a beard, and feeling a little spiteful, in consequence, when he saw other people taking the trouble to shave; but he said nothing about any infirmity or delusion, and shortly after left me.
"In my professional capacity I could not help taking some interest in Mr.
Strange. I did not altogether lose sight of him after our sea-journey to Ma.r.s.eilles was over. I found him a pleasant companion up to a certain point; but I always felt that there was a reserve about him. He was uncommunicative about his past life, and especially would never allude to anything connected with his travels or his residence in Italy, which, however, I could make out had been a long one. He spoke Italian well, and seemed familiar with the country, but disliked to talk about it.
"During the time we spent together there were seasons when he was so little himself, that I, with a pretty large experience, was almost afraid to be with him. His attacks were violent and sudden in the last degree; and there was one most extraordinary feature connected with them all:-some horrible a.s.sociation of ideas took possession of him whenever he found himself before a looking-gla.s.s. And after we had travelled together for a time, I dreaded the sight of a mirror hanging harmlessly against a wall, or a toilet-gla.s.s standing on a dressing-table, almost as much as he did.
"Poor Strange was not always affected in the same manner by a looking-gla.s.s. Sometimes it seemed to madden him with fury; at other times, it appeared to turn him to stone: remaining motionless and speechless as if attacked by catalepsy. One night-the worst things always happen at night, and oftener than one would think on stormy nights-we arrived at a small town in the central district of Auvergne: a place but little known, out of the line of railways, and to which we had been drawn, partly by the antiquarian attractions which the place possessed, and partly by the beauty of the scenery. The weather had been rather against us. The day had been dull and murky, the heat stifling, and the sky had threatened mischief since the morning. At sundown, these threats were fulfilled. The thunderstorm, which had been all day coming up-as it seemed to us, against the wind-burst over the place where we were lodged, with very great violence.
"There are some practical-minded persons with strong const.i.tutions, who deny roundly that their fellow-creatures are, or can be, affected, in mind or body, by atmospheric influences. I am not a disciple of that school, simply because I cannot believe that those changes of weather, which have so much effect upon animals, and even on inanimate objects, can fail to have some influence on a piece of machinery so sensitive and intricate as the human frame. I think, then, that it was in part owing to the disturbed state of the atmosphere that, on this particular evening I felt nervous and depressed. When my new friend Strange and I parted for the night, I felt as little disposed to go to rest as I ever did in my life. The thunder was still lingering among the mountains in the midst of which our inn was placed. Sometimes it seemed nearer, and at other times further off; but it never left off altogether, except for a few minutes at a time. I was quite unable to shake off a succession of painful ideas which persistently besieged my mind.
"It is hardly necessary to add that I thought from time to time of my travelling-companion in the next room. His image was almost continually before me. He had been dull and depressed all the evening, and when we parted for the night there was a look in his eyes which I could not get out of my memory.