My Multiverse Trip

For the next few hours I"m vomiting and sweating out blood, impurities, and any other nasty thing that"s taken place in my body. My meridians and other cultivation pathways are all being cleared of any gunk from never having been used. all in all I look kind of like a tar monster and smell like a.s.s.

however my helpful ninja body has proceeded to spray me down like some roadside wh.o.r.e with water jutsu while jasmine laughs her a.s.s off in the background.

"Ha....Ha I can"t breathe..." She snorts out in between tears and laughter.

Little brat. The other girls from the kingdom have come to look at the new realm and join in on the mocking. I"ll get them all back later.

After a few more hours of this process and finally being clean. I firmly ignore the girls and go on to my second pill of the day. It"s a healing pill. When training there can always be some hidden injuries and such you never noticed from things like overworking yourself.

I don"t know if I have any but It never hurts to make sure. After that"s done next come the strengthening pill. It helps my bodies strengthen everything from blood production to my organs basic functions. A perfect functioning body is the key to a strong foundation.

Now some of you are probably asking why don"t I just use G.o.dly pills to skyrocket my cultivation after this.

That sir is how you get a s.h.i.tty foundation and end up being so strong you can"t walk without blowing up your shoes and colliding with the house.

We like"em all natural without medicine based cultivation. "oh but you can get pills to clean out the medicine side effects."

No. Those people are idiots.

If you don"t earn it with your own hard work it"s not a real cultivation. "but my favorite novel says..." I don"t care.

now that my body is in peak conditions I can finally start the basic breathing excercises and absorb that sweet pure energy.

it"s basically like a giant vortex sucking in ma.s.sive amounts of energy I could probably shoot through a realm or so if I wanted too.

Are we going to do that? Nope that leads to shakey foundations. "But you can always use some miraculous training moves and fix it like they say in the novels."

Why would I want to do that stupid s.h.i.t when I can just do it right the first time and not have hidden c.r.a.p they thought they fixed wandering around.

basically I"m going to sit my a.s.s here at foundation stage 1 for G.o.d knows how long and I"m going to strengthen absolutely everything. Oh my vessel for energy is full? strengthen my blood. My blood is saturated? Move onto my bones to increase their blood making skills and density. My bones are as tough as I can get them? Sweet.

Next up let"s work on strengthening our muscles. Then we move on to our organs. How can we ever forget our skin and nerves? What"s that little Billy? We"ve cultivated enough for a level 1 body refinement realm? No, no, little billy. We haven"t gotten to the basics of the world yet if you paid attention is science cla.s.s little Billy you"d learn everything is made up of cells. We are gunna strengthen them too. Now that we have strengthened everything we must be ready for level 2 and we can just pop on over right? Wrong.

We must condense and absorb as much as we can slowly strengthening our meridians and vessel. When everything is at the absolute limit of what our body can handle. We let it finally upgrade to foundation level 2 naturally of course.

Now that you"ve leveled up and feel like you can punch a hole in the sky and start wanting more power. The first thing you must do is mofu mofu kurumi"s soft fox tails and calm that s.h.i.t down. Remember don"t become arrogant.

Now your thinking I"m going to repeat the process and just continue getting stronger.

Wrong! I"m going to make dinner with the waifus and ask them how their day was. Then we are all going to sit in the living room and watch movies while we cuddle.

Just because your a cultivator doesn"t mean you have to rush everything and forget about what is really important. "Oh but cultivation is the path of the lonely always striving to be number 1 at the top."

Yeah screw that. Who wants to be that lonely guy at the top whanking off to his sword collection.

"But eventually your partners will grow old and die cause they aren"t cultivators." yeah I have a philosopher"s stone for that problem.

"How about when you grow older after so many years and just naturally fall apart from each other?" yeah we are all soul bound and our love feels as strong as ever. We can literally feel each others existences and crave each others company.

Any c.r.a.p anyone spews I"ll have you guys know I can bulls.h.i.t my way out of everything.

"But you have so many wife"s how can you keep them all happy?" Background stuff.

"But..." You wanna catch these hands little billy?!?! You wanna throw down right here and now?!?!

"..." I didn"t think so.

So after some nice wholesome family loving time with hidden character development and undying love for each other. We can finally move on and start our cultivation.