After a fun day out I"m back at the house with my new roomate who insists on sleeping in my closet.However right now she is in front of me with a sketch pad.
"Ahem I think it"s about time for me to explain your new soul reaper duties since you will be filling in for me." She raises up her notepad and shows off some of the most childish drawings I"ve ever seen.
"This is you." She points to a yellow bunny. "This is the monster we fought yesterday." A black bunny with a frowny mask.
She flips over the page.
"Your job is to kill off all the hollows and help spirits pa.s.s on." the yellow bunny is standing over what appears to be a dead bunny with black x"s for eyes. next to that is the yellow bunny turning a blue bunny into a bunny with angel wings as it flies off to heaven or soul society. I had long since made it so spirits in this area get sucked into my kingdom for proper reincarnation.
"Any questions?" She asks.
"What child did you steal the crayons from and did you learn to draw from same said child?" I say with a serious face.
"What are you talking about I bought this art kit from the store." she pulls out one of those fancy art cases with like 300 different drawing items in it. "And my art skills are all self taught I"d be happy to teach you. Any other questions?"
"Why do men buy nudes when there are billions of free pictures and videos online?" i ask seriously curious.
"Who knows." She shrugs putting her doodle pad away.
Maybe one day the world would know, me being a man still doesn"t understand how it works. Why buy a picture of t.i.tties when I can spend the same amount on a delicious taco box from tacobell and be even happier.
It"s questions like these that keep me up at night.
Well back to the task at hand. Most of the hollows don"t show up much more since I keep my spirit energy contained I mean there are still some as the town has quite a bit of spiritual energy floating around.
However that is easily taken care of by the visoreds if you promise them 5 dollars per hollow killed off suddenly the town is squeeky clean of hollows.
Speaking of that do soul reapers even get paid? I ask rukia.
"Yes depending on our seat in the squad we get paid monthly." she tell me.
"And how much is that?"
"Uh about 100 dollars. I think." she says counting.
Poor suckers are working for peanuts.
Since they have spirit energy they don"t really need food and they are provided clothing when they join up.
"What about the lower people who aren"t given seats?"
"Salary is 20$ a month it"s been that for almost a thousand years." she says oblivious to her being suckered into cheap work.
"You know most people working now make a minimum of like $7.25 an hour right?"
"impossible." She says with a face that clearly says I"m joking.
I just shrug this is what you get for having a leader who is 1000 years old and from a different time I"m surprised they even have indoor plumbing....do they?
"Do you guys have indoor plumbing?"
"You mean like hotsprings?" She replies clearly confused.
"how do you get your drinking water?"
"Wells?" she asks clearly more confused.
"Do you have toilets?" I start getting desperate.
"Yes." She finally gets it.
"With flushable water?"
"Yes."
Ah good they have plumbing. For a second there I almost started plotting soul society destruction.
"We aren"t cavemen we have some technology too." She says unhappy that I"m looking down on them.
"yet you still don"t use computers to do paperwork?" this shuts her up.
"Well soul reaper jobs sound pretty easy I"ll be sure to look out for lost souls and I"m sure you have a hollow detector right?" I ask her.
"Yes I"ll let you know if any show up." of course this won"t happen as visoreds are greedy for money.
"until then let me show you the wonderful world of video games." I throw in some first person shooters and watch as she gets violently destroyed all day it brings a little happiness to my soul for some reason.
Dinner is the same with the whole family getting nice steaks and fries. I didn"t like j.a.panese food as most of it was seafood based. I do however enjoy rice and chicken dishes.
After that rukia became a part of the group she made friends with everyone got to live the life of a regular girl. But there"s always douchebags who like to spoil the fun for everyone else.
Those douchebags happened to be her older brother byakkuya and renji who on orders from the higher ups had come to retrieve her for breaking soul society rules.
They appeared in one of the soul gates near the city. instantly alerting most of the people in the city.
Standing there looking like a total douchebag was her big brother and her school friend.
"Rukia you are hereby arrested for breaking soul society law you will be given a trial and your fate decided from then." her brother said in a cold voice. she just meekly walks over.
"Wow how strict either die or give someone her powers for a while only to get punished how harsh." I say from the distance.
Byakkuya looks at me. "Who are you?"
"The person she gave her powers too." I saw with a smile.
"Then your fate is death." He says firing off a kido at my heart.
I just smack it away.
"Well I guess soul society wants to go to war with me?" I say with a darker smile.
Byakkuya narrows his eyes towards me.
"Who are you to be able to declare war on soul society your just a single person and I can"t even feel spiritual pressure from you." he mocks.
I point my finger towards my neck as he looks at me in confusion and reaches his hand up to only meet a blade.
"Byakkuya boy are you making problems for my love?" comes Yoruichis voice.
More powerful spirit energies converge on the location. none weaker than himself.
"You may go back to soul society only to spread the message to that old man that I"ll be paying a visit. Along with some friends. And if a single hair on that girls head is harmed I"ll ma.s.sacre all of soul society." I say with a sweet smile.
"Even with this much you wouldn"t be able to bring down soul society on your own." he says in the same cold voice.
"Then what about the traitors inside the walls already. I"ve already invaded and you didn"t even know it."
His face scrunches up. before he makes his way back to the soul society gate with renji and Rukia in tow.
Before the gate closes I blast a chunk out of his shoulder with a kido attack.
"little s.h.i.t."