Quietly the days pa.s.sed. Antic.i.p.ation, Anxiousness and Many other elements breaking my morale are all hitting up on me. ANXIOUSNESS?
Anxiousness because there is going to be reshuffling of the candidates of the first sem computer batch.
ANTIc.i.p.aTION?
Antic.i.p.ation of the fear which might come true.
No more practical cla.s.ses together. No more cla.s.ses together and we might get to being the same old stranger right at the beginning of the sem.
FEAR!!
Obviously, with so much ominous happenings one ought to be put back to the spot. I"m even afraid of losing Lacy"s warm company. But more afraid of losing his. I know it very well once we are separated we are done for. He won"t regard me as one of his friend even. Just my opinion. Because being a person of different gender things are not that simple as being of same gender. And why would he care to talk with me if his demands are met by someone else!
To this I really want to leave a note that no matter what happens I would really want to continue and move forward. But thinking of the new experiences we had I can"t possibly forget him. Not as easily as he doesn"t keep in touch with me since our exams ended. I remember him everyday. I even check his twitter account to find his favorites. I know it"s not a good to look into others things but when you fall in love you seem to forget all etiquettes and go mad like a hungry animal hunting for its food. I did the same to check his likes, his comments, his tweets, his replies, his friends everything almost to be exact but never once followed him. I"m just like secret admirer who doesn"t want to disrupt his life by simply making him realise that I view his profile. You bet it can be my time pa.s.s as well.
One reply to the tweet which made me jealous although I"m being a bit immature was an answer to a question. The question was, On your road trip with your fictional characters with which character do you want to spend your time with?
His reply:Hannah Baker.
It made me jealous. Of all why he needed to answer that question. I don"t mean I hate her. I had read the novel myself and have loved it very much. Especially her character. But why he had to write it.
Out of jealousy I too gave a quick reply to the tweet hosted by MediaBox.
My Reply was, Edward Cullen.
I don"t know why I had given the reply but it seemed alright to me at that time. But I don"t know why a big lump was pressing across my chest. It made me uneasy and depressed.
Another wonderful event happened on the night of the cricket match. I was replying to the cricket tweets. Was it an attempt to understand him more or something beyond that I started watching cricket. And in few days I started liking it. Finally when our country team t.i.tania won I got elated and quickly tweeted congratulations. As soon as I posted it I saw his tweet just below mine. Almost at the same time. It was really a meeting or not I don"t know. But the feel was not bad.
But thinking of tomorrow my chest sighs and is already torturing me. The Fear, Antic.i.p.ation and anxiousness is yet to be proved.