A month after Yao Mama"s arrival, a notification came from the Palace. My wedding date with Xiao Junw.a.n.ge was determined by Bixia, based on the calculation of the Palace astrologer. In the middle of autumn or a month later, the wedding will be held.My father immediately held a meeting with members of the Yun family. They discuss what must be prepared in this very short time. We only have one month to prepare it. The time for preparing my wedding was shorter than the preparation time for Yun Jing Fei"s wedding.
As a result of the meeting, they will make a simple party. This was determined by considering short preparation time. Since the meeting was over, every member of my family became busy.
My father started contacting his close colleague in the government. Uncle Chen contacted his trading business colleague. My mother contacted fabric and jewelry merchants. My aunt contacted a food dealer. Uncle Zixin contacted the Yun branch family members.
Not only my uncle, my aunt and my parents became busy. My younger brother became busy too. He has the duty to arrange the arrangement of the event and ensure security. He had to meet Eunuch Zhu several times to ask for advice on the rituals of imperial marriage.
Seeing their hard work and effort, I was touched. I have disappointed them with my previous actions. However, for this marriage, they sacrificed a lot of their strength and time for me.
Even though I wasn"t enthusiastic, I finally got involved. At first I thought that the clothes for my wedding would be sewn by Royal tailor"s. However, they refused. Huanghou (Empress) gave instructions that I have to sew my own wedding clothes for myself and for Xiao Junw.a.n.gye.
Make two wedding clothes in one month? How can I do it in one month? The Royal Tailor must have difficulty for making wedding clothes in such a short time like that. Especially me!
Huanghou (Empress) seems give this instructions as her way to punish me. Of course she was angry because I tried to curse his son and daughter-in-law with my suicide attempt before. If the dress isn"t finished in one month, I"ll be even more humiliated. That"s punishment way sound great!
I think social sanctions such as humiliation, are more severe than physical sanctions. It"s better to be beaten until you can"t walk than to be humiliated by the society. However, I must not protest to Huanghou. I have to obey her words.
Finally, I asked Ling to help me sew and embroider my wedding clothes. Luckily my wedding clothes don"t require a lot of embroidery.
The wedding dress in our dynasty is modesty and solemn. The color is different from ages. Black and light red is the main color in this dynasty, while the ages are bright red. Bridegroom"s wedding dress called jue bian xuan duan and Bride wedding dress called chun yi xun ran.
To sew these two clothes, I lost my sleep time. Almost every night, I sleep in the middle of the night. Sometimes I sew it wrong so I have to repeat it again.
For the size of Xiao Junw.a.n.gye"s clothes, I sent a letter to Yao Mama to be able to meet Xiao Junw.a.n.gye and measure his body. However, Yao Mama refused my request. She said Xiao Junw.a.n.gye was busy and couldn"t meet me. Instead it, she sent Xiao Junw.a.n.gye"s clothes.
Actually I"m upset about this refusal. What made the useless prince busy? As far as I know, he doesn"t have an important role in the Palace. Bixia did not entrust a single task to his useless son. Is Xiao Junw.a.n.gye busy playing with other women? That thought made me feel disgusted.
But on the one hand, I feel happy not to meet him. If I meet him, my mood must be bad. There are many bad rumors about him. If we meet, I can see the rumor is true, then I will fall into the abyss of sadness before we get married.
I have been saddened by the marriage decree and the sentence of sewing this wedding dress. I don"t want to add to my sadness anymore.
Finally after three weeks of struggling to sew our wedding clothes, I sent bridegroom"s wedding dress to Yao Mama. Yao Mama replied it by sending a small wooden box containing jewelry for the wedding. The jewelry sent by Yao Mama looks simple and the price seems cheaper than my own jewelry. Even though I was disappointed to see the mode, I was forced to accept it and wear it on my wedding day.
I can only accept to this situation.
***
Mid-Autumn finally arrived. Today my wedding day. In fact, during this week, several times I intended to run away from Yun manor.
Imagining the unhappy life that I will live with Xiao Junw.a.n.gye, I want to run away. However, every time I intend to run away, my family"s face immediately rings in my mind.
If I run away, my family will receive Bixia"s punishment. This time is definitely heavier than the previous punishment.
Today, Ling and my mother helped me wear my wedding clothes. They also helped me make up myself. I wears xunran, which includes a light red underwear and a black outwear. Besides, I has bound the hair up with a 50cm hair band and a 25cm hairpin.
I chose a bright red lipstick to give a bright impression. My wedding clothes are black with red embroidery on the edges. If I"m not wearing the right makeup, I will look gloomy with my clothes.
After wearing my wedding clothes and my face dressing, my mother told Ling to go out from my room.
"Xia He, since you marry Xiao Junw.a.n.gye, you have to keep your husband"s reputation," my mother advised. I nodded my head. But in my heart, I reject her words. How do I keep someone"s reputation bad?
"You have to support his and made his reputation better," my mother said again. I nod my head. But, in my heart, I doubt her words. How do I make people"s reputation good? While I still can"t clear my name now.
"Xia He, on your first night maybe it will be difficult for you. You just have to surrender your self to your husband, "my mother said and her cheeks turned red. I did not understand her words, but I nodded my head.
"Furen, the groom has come," Ling suddenly entered the room. I could hear loud noises from outside. The sound of firecrackers being burned and the sound of cheerful music mixed in one time.
"The time has come," my mother said and smiled.
"Xia He, I"m sure you will be happy. When we marry you to someone, you are still a member of this family. If you need help, don"t feel embarra.s.sed to ask us, "my mother asked me. I nod my head.
My mother"s words calm me down. I once thought that this marriage would leave me and my family apart.
The old adage says, when married, a woman belongs to her husband and her husband"s family.
However, my mother"s words calmed me because I knew that my family was on my side.
"This is a hard time for a mother. Marrying a daughter, it feels heavier than marrying a boy. Finally I have to give my beloved daughter to someone else, "mother said and her tears fell.
I wiped his tears with the handkerchief I held. My mother smiled. She patted my shoulder softly to calm me down.
"Xia He, good luck forever," my mother said. She hugged me then took a red veil. She covered my face with the red veil. Inside the veil, I secretly cry.