"Their memories adjust. They forget their friends, their relatives, their husbands and wives in the old world line. They remember what man is king or president or chairman in the new. But not us. You and I are different. I can recognize the rare ones."
"Because you can read minds." Sarcastically. Part of me still disbelieved; yet . . . it fit too well. The brown-haired man talked like a mathematics professor because he was talking to me, and I was a mathematics professor, and he was reading my mind.
He looked thoughtfully into his gla.s.s. "It"s funny, how many sense the truth. They won"t walk or drive in the fog if they can help it. At the bottom of their minds, they know that they might return home to find a Romish camp, or a Druidic dancing ground, or the center of a city, or a sand dune. You knew it yourself. The top of your mind thinks I"m an entertaining liar. The deepest part of you knew it all before I spoke."
"I just don"t like fog," I said. I looked out the window, toward my hotel, which was just across the street. I saw only wet gray chaos and a swirling motion.
"Wait until it clears."
"Maybe I will. Refill?"
"Thanks."
Somehow, I found myself doing most of the talking. The brown-haired man listened, nodded occasionally, asked questions from time to time.
We did not mention fog.
"I need an ordered universe," I said at one point. "Why else would I have studied math? There"s never an ambiguity in mathematics."
"Whereas in interpersonal relationships..."
"Yes! Exactly!"
"But mathematics is a game. Abstract mathematics doesn"t connect with the real universe except by coincidence or convenience. Like the imaginary number system: it"s used in circuit design, but it certainly wasn"t intended for that."
"No, of course not."
"So that"s why you never got married?"
"Right," I said sadly. "Ordered universe. Hey, I never knew that. Did I?"
The fog cleared about one o"clock. My brown-haired friend accompanied me out.
"Mathematics doesn"t fit reality," he was saying. "No more than a game of bridge. The real universe is chaotic."
"Like in-ter-personal re-lationships."
"Maybe you"ll find them easier now."
"Like fog. Well, maybe I will. I know some new things about myself Where"s my hotel?"
There was no hotel across the street.
Suddenly I was cold sober, and cold scared.
"So," said my drinking partner. "You must have lost it earlier. Was it foggy when you crossed?"
"Thick as paste. Oh, brother. Now what do I do?"
"I think the fog"s starting to roll in again. Why not wait? The bar won"t close until four."
"They close at two in my world." In my world In my world. When I admitted that, I made it real.
"Then maybe you should stay in this one. At least the bartender took your money. Which reminds me. Here." He handed me my wallet.
He must have picked my pocket earlier. "For services rendered," he said. "But it looks like you"ll need the money."
I was too worried to be angry. "My money pa.s.ses, but my checks won"t. I"ve got half a term of teaching to finish at Berkeley. . . Tenure, dammit! I"ve got to get back."
"I"m going to run for it," said the brown-haired man. "Try the fog if you like. You might find your way home." And off he went, running to beat the fog. It was drifting in in gray tendrils as I went back into the bar.
An hour later the fog was a cubic mile of cotton, as they say. I walked into it.
I intended to circle the block where I had left my hotel. But there was no way to get my bearings, and the outlines of the block would not hold still. Sight was gone, sound was strangely altered and m.u.f.fled. I walked blind and half-deaf, with my arms outstretched to protect my face, treading lightly for fear of being tripped.
One thing, at least, the brown-haired man had failed to warn me about.
I walked up to a pedestrian-sized gray blur to ask directions, and when I reached it it wasn"t human. It watched me dispa.s.sionately as I sidled off.
I might have drifted away from the area. The hotel varied from an ancient barrow to a hot springs (I smelled warm pungent steam) to a gla.s.s-sided skysc.r.a.per to a vertical slab of black basalt to an enormous pit with red-glowing rock at the bottom. It never became a hotel.
The mist was turning white with dawn. I heard something coming near: the putt-putt-putt of a motor scooter, but distorted. Distorted to the clop-clop-clop of a horse"s hooves . . . and still approaching. It became a pad-pad-pad-pad, the sound of something heavy and catlike. I stood frozen. . .
The fog blew clear, and the sound was two sets of footsteps, two oddly dressed men walking toward me. It was dawn, and the fog was gone, and I was stranded.
In eerie silence the men took me by the elbows, turned me about and walked me into the building which had been my hotel. It had become a kind of hospital.
At first it was very bad. The attendants spoke an artificial language, very simple and unambiguous, like deaf-mute sign language. Until I learned it, I thought I had been booked into a mental hospital.
It was a retraining center for people who can"t read minds.
I was inside for a month, and then an outpatient for another six. Quick progress, they say; but then, I hadn"t suffered organic brain damage. Most patients are there because of damage to the right parietal lobe.
It was no trouble to pay the hospital fees. I hold patents on the pressure spray can and the butane lighter. Now I"m trying to design a stapler.
And when the fog is a cubic mile of cotton, as we say, I stay put until it goes away.
Chint.i.thpit-mang remembered the man"s rib cage sagging under his foot. It thrashed and clawed and finally stopped moving ... It didn"t know how to surrender. They didn"t know how to surrender. Bad. Bad.
FOOTFALL, 1985.
THE MEDDLER.
"The Meddler" began as satire. The Mickey Spillane school of writing was still alive and well in those days. What I learned was that if I set out to satirize a school of writing, I must know how to use it too. "The Meddler" is detective fiction; I was forced to make it a fair puzzle. satire. The Mickey Spillane school of writing was still alive and well in those days. What I learned was that if I set out to satirize a school of writing, I must know how to use it too. "The Meddler" is detective fiction; I was forced to make it a fair puzzle.
Someone was in my room.
It had to be one of Sinc"s boys. He"d been stupid. I"d left the lights off. The yellow light now seeping under the door was all the warning I needed.
He hadn"t used the door: the threads were still there. That left the fire escape outside the bedroom window.
I pulled my gun, moved back a little in the corridor to get elbow room. Then- I"d practiced it often enough to drive the management crazy- I kicked the door open and was into the room in one smooth motion.
He should have been behind the door, or crouching behind a table, or hidden in the closet with his eye to the keyhole. Instead he was right out in the middle of the living room, facing the wrong way. He"d barely started to turn when I pumped four GyroJet slugs into him. I saw the impacts twitching his shirt. One over the heart.
He was finished.
So I didn"t slow down to watch him fall. I crossed the living-room rug in a diving run and landed behind the couch. He couldn"t be alone. There had to be others. If one had been behind the couch he might have gotten me, but there wasn"t. I scanned the wall behind me, but there was nothing to bide under. So I froze, waiting, listening.
Where were they? The one I"d shot couldn"t have come alone.
I was peeved at Sinc. As long as he"d sent goons to waylay me, he might have sent a few who knew what they were doing. The one I"d shot hadn"t had time to know he was in a fight.
"Why did you do that?"
Impossibly, the voice came from the middle of the living room, where I"d left a falling corpse. I risked a quick look and brought my head down fast. The afterimage: He hadn"t moved. There was no blood on him. No gun visible, but I hadn"t seen his right hand.
Bulletproof vest? Sinc"s boys had no rep for that kind of thing, but that had to be it. I stood up suddenly and fired, aiming between the eyes.
The slug smashed his right eye, off by an inch, and I knew he"d shaken me. I dropped back and tried to cool off.
No noises. Still no sign that he wasn"t alone.
"I said, "Why did you do that?""
Mild curiosity colored his high-pitched voice. He didn"t move as I stood up, and there was no hole in either eye.
"Why did I do what?" I asked cleverly.
"Why did you make holes in me? My grat.i.tude for the gift of metal, of course, but-" He stopped suddenly, like he"d said too much and knew it. But I had other worries.
"Anyone else here?"
"Only we two are present. I beg pardon for invasion of privacy, and will indemnify-" He stopped again, as suddenly, and started over. "Who were you expecting?"
"Sinc"s boys. I guess they haven"t caught on yet. Sinc"s boys want to make holes in me me."
"Why?"
Could he be this stupid? "To turn me off! To kill me!"
He looked surprised, then furious. He was so mad he gurgled. "I should have been informed! Someone has been unforgivably sloppy!"
"Yeah. Me. I thought you must be with Sinc. I shouldn"t have shot at you. Sorry."
"Nothing," he smiled, instantly calm again.
"But I ruined your suit ..." I trailed off. Holes showed in his jacket and shirt, but no blood. "Just what are are you?" you?"
He stood about five feet four, a round little man in an old-fashioned brown one-b.u.t.ton suit. There was not a hair on him, not even eyelashes. No warts, no wrinkles, no character lines. A nebbish, one of these guys whose edges are all round, like someone forgot to put in the fine details.
He spread smoothly manicured hands. "I am a man like yourself."
"Nuts."
"Well," he said angrily, "you would have thought so if the preliminary investigation team had done their work properly!"
"You"re a- martian?"
"I am not not a martian. I am-" He gurgled. "Also I am an anthropologist. Your world. I am here to study your species." a martian. I am-" He gurgled. "Also I am an anthropologist. Your world. I am here to study your species."
"You"re from outer s.p.a.ce?"
"Very. The direction and distance are secret, of course. My very existence should have been secret." He scowled deeply. Rubber face, I thought, not knowing the half of it yet.
"I won"t talk," I rea.s.sured him. "But you came it a bad time. Any minute now, Sinc"s going to figure out who it is that"s on his tail. Then he"ll be on mine, and this dump"ll be ground zero. I hate to brush you. I"ve never met a ... whatever."
"I too must terminate this interview, since you know me for what I am. But first, tell me of your quarrel. Why does Sinc want to make holes in you?"
"His name is Lester Dunhaven Sinclair the third. He runs every racket in this city. Look, we"ve got time for a drink-maybe. I"ve got scotch, bourbon-"
He shuddered. "No, I thank you."
"Just trying to set you at ease." I was a little miffed.
"Then perhaps I may adapt a more comfortable form, while you drink- whatever you choose. If you don"t mind."
"Please yourself." I went to the rolling bar and poured bourbon and tap water, no ice. The apartment house was dead quiet. I wasn"t surprised. I"ve lived here a couple of years now, and the other tenants have learned the routine. When guns go off, they hide under their beds and stay there.
"You won"t be shocked?" My visitor seemed anxious. "If you are shocked, please say so at once."
And he melted. I stood there with the paper cup to my lip and watched him flow out of his one-b.u.t.ton suit and take the compact shape of a half-deflated gray beach ball.
I downed the bourbon and poured more, no water. My hands stayed steady.
"I"m a private cop," I told the martian. He"d extruded a convoluted something I decided was an ear. "When Sinc showed up about three years ago and started taking over the rackets, I stayed out of his way. He was the law"s business, I figured. Then he bought the law, and that was okay too. I"m no crusader."
"Crusader?" His voice had changed. Now it was deep, and it sounded like something bubbling up from a tar pit.
"Never mind. I tried to stay clear of Sinc, but it didn"t work. Sinc had a client of mine killed. Morrison, his name was. I was following Morrison"s wife, getting evidence for a divorce. She was shacking up with a guy named Adler. I had all the evidence I needed when Morrison disappeared.