"I"ll take care of Doll Girl. Give me a couple weeks. Can you take care of her for that long?"
Jarl"s eyes were filling with tears, and Azoth was afraid his would too. They called each other Jarl and Azoth now, not Jay-Oh and Azo.
Azoth said, "I"m going to tell Momma K how smart you are and see if she has work for you. You know, if things don"t work out with Two Fist."
"You"d do that for me?"
"Sure, Jay-Oh."
"Azo?" Jarl said.
"Yeah?"
Jarl hesitated, swallowed. "I just wish..."
"Me too, Jarl. Me too."
15
The price of disobedience is death. The words kept running through his head every day as Azoth planned his disobedience. The words kept running through his head every day as Azoth planned his disobedience.
Azoth"s training was brutally hard, but it wasn"t brutal. In the guilds, a Fist might beat you to make a point and make a mistake that left you permanently maimed. Master Blint never made mistakes. Azoth hurt exactly as much as Blint wanted him to. Usually, that was a lot.
But so what? Azoth had two meals a day. He could eat as much as he wanted, and Blint worked the soreness out of his muscles every day as they trained. Azoth had two meals a day. He could eat as much as he wanted, and Blint worked the soreness out of his muscles every day as they trained.
At first everything was curses and beatings. Azoth couldn"t do anything right. But curses were just air, and beatings were just momentary pain. Blint would never maim Azoth, and if he chose to kill him, there was nothing Azoth could do to stop him anyway.
It was the closest thing to safety he"d ever known.
Within weeks, he realized he liked the training. The sparring, the blunted practice weapons, the obstacle courses, even the herb lore. Learning reading with Momma K was hard. But so what? But so what? Two hours of frustration a day was nothing. Azoth"s life was good. Two hours of frustration a day was nothing. Azoth"s life was good.
Within a month, he realized that he was Talented. It wasn"t obvious, and if he hadn"t been so keyed in to Master Blint"s every mood and reaction, he would never have noticed, but now and then, he"d see a faint look of surprise as he mastered some new skill more quickly than Master Blint had expected.
It made him work all the harder, hoping to see that look not once a week, but once a day. For her part, Momma K made him decipher squiggles for longer than he could imagine. She had a way of smiling and saying just the right thing that it pulled him along through the hours. Words were power, she said. Words were another sword for the man who wielded them well. And he would need them if the world was to believe that he was Kylar Stern, so Momma K worked with him on his alternate ident.i.ty, quizzing him with likely questions other n.o.bles would ask, helping him come up with harmless stories about growing up in eastern Cenaria, and teaching him the rudiments of etiquette. She told him Count Drake would teach him the rest once he went to live with the Drakes. When Azoth walked in the Drakes" door, she said, he would be Kylar forever after. Blint would train him in a safe house on the east side. Momma K would meet with him in one of her homes on the east side. Only when he started accompanying Blint on jobs would he return to the Warrens. the rest once he went to live with the Drakes. When Azoth walked in the Drakes" door, she said, he would be Kylar forever after. Blint would train him in a safe house on the east side. Momma K would meet with him in one of her homes on the east side. Only when he started accompanying Blint on jobs would he return to the Warrens.
Azoth worked hard for her and without complaint except for one time when he got disgusted at his own stupidity and threw a book across the room. He worked in the h.e.l.l of Momma K"s displeasure for a week until he brought her some flowers he"d stolen and she forgave him.
He"d given Jarl plenty of money to take care of Doll Girl, but Jarl wouldn"t be able to just give her the money; someone would steal it. The worst part of it was that she was alone. Mute and with a horribly beaten face, she wouldn"t be making any friends, either.
The price of disobedience is death, Master Blint had said. And he"d forbidden him to see Doll Girl again. Ever.
Momma K told Azoth that Master Blint would eventually come to like him and trust him, but that when he said things like that, for now Azoth should take it as law. That made Azoth hopeful-until she clarified: street law, which was immutable and omnipotent; not the pathetic king"s law. It was a shame, because Azoth had to see Doll Girl one last time.
When he did get his chance, it was through no guile of his own. Master Blint had a job, so he simply left Azoth to his own devices. He left a list of ch.o.r.es, too, but Azoth knew that if he hurried, he could finish all the ch.o.r.es and still have several hours before he was supposed to meet with Momma K for his reading lesson.
He threw himself into his work with a fury. He dusted the weapons room, climbing up on a ladder to reach the higher rows of weapons and the equipment out of his reach. He checked and cleaned the wood practice weapons. He oiled and cleaned the weapons Master Blint had used recently. He worked a different kind of oil into the leather targets and dummies that Master Blint made him attack by the hour. He checked the seams on the ones Master Blint himself had kicked, and finding several burst, sewed them shut again. He wasn"t very good with a needle, but Master Blint tolerated less than perfect work here-if nowhere else. He swept the floor, and as always, didn"t throw the dirt out into the street, but collected it in a small bin. Master Blint didn"t want him to leave the safe house. Not ever, unless he was under direct orders.
He found himself cleaning one of Blint"s daggers a second time. It was a long thin blade with tiny gold filigree. Through chance or age, the gold was thin in the grooves that had been etched for it, so blood had collected in every narrow groove of the filigree-Blint had used this blade recently, and he must have been in a hurry when he sheathed it. So Azoth found himself using the point of another fine dagger to pick out the blood. every narrow groove of the filigree-Blint had used this blade recently, and he must have been in a hurry when he sheathed it. So Azoth found himself using the point of another fine dagger to pick out the blood.
He should have soaked the blade in water and then scrubbed it vigorously, but this was his last ch.o.r.e. It was still three hours until he was supposed to be at Momma K"s. If he had to work on ch.o.r.es until then, it wouldn"t be his fault that he didn"t leave.
"What happens if you do nothing?" Blint had asked him. "Nothing. There"s a price and a terrible freedom to that, boy. Remember it." Master Blint had been speaking of making your move on a deader when things looked risky, but Azoth could feel the burden of those words now.
If I do something, what"s the worst that could happen? Master Blint kills me. That was pretty bad. The odds of it were low, though. Unlike other wetboys who might spend their whole lives in the Warrens, Master Blint only took jobs from people who could afford his prices. That usually meant n.o.bles. That always meant east side. So he"d be on the opposite side of the city from Azoth. That was pretty bad. The odds of it were low, though. Unlike other wetboys who might spend their whole lives in the Warrens, Master Blint only took jobs from people who could afford his prices. That usually meant n.o.bles. That always meant east side. So he"d be on the opposite side of the city from Azoth.
The real worst case if I do nothing? Doll Girl dies.
He put down the dagger with a grimace.
Finding Doll Girl was easier said than done. The Black Dragon guild had ceased to exist. It was just gone. Kylar went to their old territory and found that it had been swallowed by Red Hand, Burning Man, and Rusty Knife. The old Black Dragons scrawled on buildings and aqueducts were already fading. He wore a pair of daggers, but he didn"t have to use them. Once, he was stopped by some Burning Men, but one of the bigs used to be one of his lizards. The boy spoke a few words to the others who were about to try to rob Azoth, and they eased away. The lizard never said a word to him.
He crisscrossed their old territory half a dozen times, but he never found Doll Girl. Once, he thought he saw Corbin Fishill, someone he"d always known was important, and who he now knew-Master Blint had told him-was one of the Nine. But all the guild rats he saw kept their distance.
Time was running out when Azoth finally thought of the old bakery. Doll Girl was there, alone. She had her back to him, and for a moment, he paused, afraid to get her attention. Then she turned.
Rat"s sadism was evident. A month hadn"t been long enough for her wounds to heal. It had only been long enough to show both what her face must have looked like for the last weeks, and what it would look like for the rest of her life. Rat had beaten her first, just beat her into submission or unconsciousness. Then he"d taken a knife to her face.
One deep cut looped from the corner of her left eye to the corner of her mouth. It had been st.i.tched with dozens of tiny st.i.tches, but the resulting scar would tug the corner of Doll Girl"s mouth up into an unnatural grin forever. Her other cheek bore a broad X-shaped cut, which was matched again by a smaller X across her lips in front. Eating, smiling, frowning-moving her mouth at all must have been excruciating. One of her eyes was still swollen, and Azoth wasn"t sure if she"d ever be able to see out of it again. The rest of the wounds looked like they would fade. A scab on her forehead, the barest yellow around her other eye as the black faded, and a nose that must have been reset because Azoth was sure Rat had broken it. mouth. It had been st.i.tched with dozens of tiny st.i.tches, but the resulting scar would tug the corner of Doll Girl"s mouth up into an unnatural grin forever. Her other cheek bore a broad X-shaped cut, which was matched again by a smaller X across her lips in front. Eating, smiling, frowning-moving her mouth at all must have been excruciating. One of her eyes was still swollen, and Azoth wasn"t sure if she"d ever be able to see out of it again. The rest of the wounds looked like they would fade. A scab on her forehead, the barest yellow around her other eye as the black faded, and a nose that must have been reset because Azoth was sure Rat had broken it.
All in all, her face was, and was supposed to be, a testament to cruelty. Rat wanted anyone who ever looked at Doll Girl to know that she hadn"t just had an accident. He wanted everyone to know that this had been done deliberately. For a moment, Azoth wished Rat"s death had been even more horrible.
Then time seemed to start again. He was staring at Doll Girl, staring at his friend"s face with open horror. Her eyes, that had been so full of surprise and sudden hope, brimmed full with tears. She covered herself and turned away, crying silently, her thin shoulders shaking.
He sat next to her. "I came as soon as I could. I"ve got a master now and I had to disobey him just to be here, but I couldn"t leave you here. Things have been bad, huh?" She started sobbing.
He could just imagine the names they must have called her. Sometimes he wanted to kill everyone in the Warrens. How could they make fun of Doll Girl? How could they hurt her? It was a miracle she was still alive. A miracle, and Jarl. Jarl must have risked his life a dozen times.
Azoth scooted over and pulled her close. She turned and clung to him as if her tears would wash her away. He held her and cried.
Time pa.s.sed. Azoth felt like he"d been squeezed dry. He wasn"t sure how long he"d held her, but he knew it had been too long. "I have good news," he told her.
She looked up at him with those big brown eyes.
"Come with me," he said.
Doll Girl followed him out of the Warrens, over the Vanden Bridge, and to Count Drake"s. Her eyes widened as they headed toward the count"s house, and further when the old porter opened the door for Azoth and showed them in.
Count Drake was in his office. He rose and ushered them in, somehow not even registering surprise at how awful Doll Girl"s face looked. He was a better person than Azoth.
"Has Azoth told you why you"re here, young lady?" the count asked. The name was a deliberate choice, Azoth saw. Doll Girl was part of Azoth"s life-she wouldn"t be part of Kylar"s. She wasn"t going to know his new name. name was a deliberate choice, Azoth saw. Doll Girl was part of Azoth"s life-she wouldn"t be part of Kylar"s. She wasn"t going to know his new name.
Doll Girl shook her head shyly, clinging to Azoth.
"We"ve found a family for you, Doll Girl," Count Drake said. "They want you to come and be their daughter. They"re going to take care of you. You"ll never have to sleep on the streets again. They serve in a house here on the east side. If you don"t want to, you never have to go back to the Warrens ever again."
Of course, it had all been a little more involved than that. Count Drake had known the family for some time. They had taken in other slaveborn orphans over the years, but couldn"t afford to feed another. So Azoth had sworn that he would provide for her out of his wages, which were already generous, and which Master Blint had told him would increase as he became more useful. Count Drake hadn"t been enamored of keeping any secret from Master Blint, but after Azoth had explained what had happened, he"d been willing to help.
Doll Girl clung to Azoth, either not understanding or not believing what the count had just said.
Count Drake stood. "Well, I"m sure you have some things you probably wish to tell her, and I need to get the coach in order, so if you"ll excuse me?" He left them alone, and Doll Girl looked at Azoth with accusing eyes.
"You never were dumb," he said.
She squeezed his hand, hard.
"My master ordered me not to see you. Today is the last time we ever get to see each other." She tugged on his hand, face pugnacious. "Yes, ever," he said. "I don"t want it to be this way, but he"ll kill me if he finds out I defied him even this much. I"m sorry. Please don"t be mad at me."
She was crying again and there was nothing he could do.
"I have to go now. He might be back any time. I"m sorry." He tore his eyes from her and stepped toward the door.
"Don"t leave me."
The voice sent a lance of ice down his spine. He turned, incredulous. It was a little girl voice, exactly like you"d expect if you didn"t know Doll Girl was a mute.
"Please?" Doll Girl said. It was a pretty voice, incongruous coming out of a beaten mask of a face Rat had left her.
Azoth"s eyes filled with tears again, and he ran out the door- Straight into someone tall and lean and as hard as if he"d been cut out of solid rock. Azoth fell on his b.u.t.t and stared up in horror.
Master Blint"s face was purple with fury. "You dare?" he shouted. "After all I"ve done for you, you defy me? I just killed one of the Nine and what do you do? You walk around the killing ground for two hours, so everyone knows Blint"s apprentice was there. You may have cost me everything!" all I"ve done for you, you defy me? I just killed one of the Nine and what do you do? You walk around the killing ground for two hours, so everyone knows Blint"s apprentice was there. You may have cost me everything!"
He swept Azoth off the ground as if he were a kitten and hit him. Azoth"s tunic tore in Blint"s hand as he fell back from the force of the blow. But Blint came forward, and this time his closed fist crashed against Azoth"s jaw.
Azoth"s face rebounded off the count"s floor and he barely saw Doll Girl flying at Master Blint as the huge black sword cleared its sheath.
"Don"t hurt her!" Azoth shouted. Insanely, he threw himself at Blint and grabbed Retribution"s blade, but Blint was a force of nature. He didn"t even slow as he scooped Doll Girl up and deposited her in the hall. He locked the door, unlocked it, and relocked it in rapid succession. He turned back to Azoth, but whatever he was about to say died. The great black sword was still locked in Azoth"s hands, cutting to the bone. Except that now it wasn"t black. The blade was glowing blue.
Incandescent blue fire surrounded Azoth"s hand, burning cold into his cut fingers, spreading down the blade- "No, not that! It"s mine!" Blint cried. He flung the sword aside as if it were an adder, away from both of them. If there had been fury in his eyes before, now it turned to absolute unreasoning rage. Azoth didn"t even see the first blow. He didn"t even know how he"d reached the floor again. Something wet and sticky was blocking out his vision.
Then the world faded into repeated heavy blows and exploding light and pain and the sharp garlicky breath of Master Blint and distant shouting and banging on a door that seemed further and further away.
16
Durzo gazed into the frothy brown ale as if it held answers. It didn"t, and he had a choice to make. The usual forced gaiety of the brothel swirled around him, but n.o.body male or female bothered him. Perhaps it was Retribution unsheathed on the table in front of him. Perhaps it was merely the look on his face.
Don"t hurt her! Azoth had yelled. As if Durzo would murder some Azoth had yelled. As if Durzo would murder some seven-year-old girl. What kind of a monster did the boy think he was? Then he remembered beating the s.h.i.t out of the boy, artlessly pounding that yielding child flesh, beating him unconscious before Count Drake broke the door down and grabbed him. He"d almost killed Count Drake for that, he"d been so wild. The count had fixed such a look on Durzo-d.a.m.n Count Drake and his d.a.m.n holy eyes. seven-year-old girl. What kind of a monster did the boy think he was? Then he remembered beating the s.h.i.t out of the boy, artlessly pounding that yielding child flesh, beating him unconscious before Count Drake broke the door down and grabbed him. He"d almost killed Count Drake for that, he"d been so wild. The count had fixed such a look on Durzo-d.a.m.n Count Drake and his d.a.m.n holy eyes.
That incandescent blue. d.a.m.n it. d.a.m.n all magic. In that flash of blue on Retribution, he"d seen his hope die. The hope had been dying since Vonda died, but that blue was a door slamming shut forever. It meant Azoth was worthy as Durzo was not, as if all of Durzo"s years of service were worth nothing. The boy was taking from him all that made him special. What did that leave for Durzo Blint?
Ashes. Ashes, and blood, and nothing more.
Suddenly the sword Retribution before him seemed a mockery. Retribution? Giving people what they deserve? If I really did that, I"d shove that d.a.m.n blade down my own throat. Retribution? Giving people what they deserve? If I really did that, I"d shove that d.a.m.n blade down my own throat.
The last time he"d been so close to madness had been when Vonda died, four months and six days ago. Sighing, he swirled the ale around in the gla.s.s, but he didn"t drink. Time enough for that later. Later, after he made his decision, he"d need a drink. He"d need twelve, no matter what he decided.
He"d drunk a lot with Vonda. It p.i.s.sed her sister off. Of course, the whole relationship had p.i.s.sed Momma K off. She"d forbidden Durzo to see her innocent little sister. She"d forbidden Vonda to see the wetboy. Momma K, so smart in other matters, had probably done more to get their relationship going than anything. Surrounded by easy flesh, whether he paid for it or not, Gwinvere"s little sister was suddenly intriguing. He wanted to know if the virginal bit was an act.
It was. He"d been disappointed but had hidden it. It was hypocrisy, anyway, and she"d had plenty of other mysteries. Vonda didn"t always treat him well, but at least she didn"t fear him. He didn"t think she understood him enough to fear him. She seemed to just glide along on the surface of life while others had to plunge into the sewer water. Durzo hadn"t understood her, and it had entranced him.
After their affair started, he might have kept it secret. He could have; he knew Gwinvere"s schedule well enough that they could have kept things going for years. Even with Gwinvere"s insight, Durzo knew how to be inscrutable. But it hadn"t happened. Vonda had told her. Probably announced it immediately, if Durzo knew Vonda. It might have been a little callous, but Vonda didn"t know what she was doing.
"End this now, Durzo Blint," Gwinvere had told him, quite calmly. "She"ll destroy you. I love my sister, but she will be your ruin." It had all been words. Words to get Gwinvere"s way, as always. With all her power, it infuriated her that she couldn"t run the lives of those she really wanted to. "She"ll destroy you. I love my sister, but she will be your ruin." It had all been words. Words to get Gwinvere"s way, as always. With all her power, it infuriated her that she couldn"t run the lives of those she really wanted to.
She"d been right, of course. Maybe not in the way she had meant it, but she"d been right. Gwinvere always had understood him better than anyone else, and he"d understood her. They were mirrors to each other. Gwinvere Kirena would have been perfect for him-if he could love what he saw in the mirror.
Why am I thinking about this? It"s all old s.h.i.t. It"s all finished. There was a choice to be made: did he raise the boy and hope, or did he kill him now? There was a choice to be made: did he raise the boy and hope, or did he kill him now?
Hope. Right. Hope is the lies we tell ourselves about the future. He"d hoped before. Dared to dream about a different life, but when it came time- He"d hoped before. Dared to dream about a different life, but when it came time- "You look pensive, Gaelan Starfire," a Ladeshian bard said, seating himself across from Durzo without waiting to be asked.
"I"m deciding who to kill. Call me that again and you jump to the front of the list, Aristarchos."
The bard smiled with the confidence of a man who knows he has perfect white teeth that only set off a handsome face. By the Night Angels.
"We"ve been awfully curious about what"s been happening for the last few months."
"You and the Society can go to h.e.l.l," Durzo said.
"I think you like the attention, Durzo Blint. Durzo Blint. If you wanted us dead, we"d be dead. Or are you really bound by this code of retribution? It"s of considerable debate in the society." If you wanted us dead, we"d be dead. Or are you really bound by this code of retribution? It"s of considerable debate in the society."
"Still fighting over the same questions, huh? Don"t you all have anything better to do? Talk talk talk. Why don"t you do something productive for once?"
"We"re trying, Durzo. In fact, that"s why I"m here. I want to help you."
"How kind."
"You"ve lost it, haven"t you?" Aristarchos asked. "Have you lost it, or has it abandoned you? Do the stones really choose their own masters?"
Durzo noticed he was spinning the knife from finger to finger again. It wasn"t to intimidate the Ladeshian-who laudably enough didn"t even glance at it-it just kept his hands busy. It was nothing. He stopped it. "Here"s why I"ve never been friends with any of you, Aristarchos: I don"t know if your little circle has ever been interested in me, or if it"s only interested in my power. Once, I was almost convinced to share some of my mysteries, but I realized that what I share with one of you, I share with all of you. So tell me, why would I give my enemies such power?"
"Is that what we"ve come to?" Aristarchos asked. "Enemies? Why then do you not wipe us from the face of the earth? You"re uniquely suited to such a task." do you not wipe us from the face of the earth? You"re uniquely suited to such a task."
"I don"t kill without cause. Fear isn"t enough to motivate me. It may be beyond your comprehension, but I can hold power without using it."