This window ... it had started falling a few minutes after someone insulted Gillian"s mother. n.o.body had heard it actually break, but it couldn"t have h appened too long ago.
The small hairs on the back of Gillian"s neck stirred and she felt a fluttering inside.
It couldn"t be. Angel hadn"t even appeared to her yet. . . .
But he"d said he was always with her. . . . An angel wouldn"t destroy thing s. . . . But Angel was a different kind of angel. (Ah, excuse me. h.e.l.lo? Do you want to share some thoughts with me?) (Angel!) For the first time since his soft voice had sounded in her ear, Gil lian felt a sense of- over-crowdedness. Of her own lack of privacy. The unea sy fluttering inside her increased. (Angel, I was just-just wondering . . .) And then the silent words burst out. (Angel, you wouldn"t-would you? You di dn"t do those things for my sake- "break the mirror and that window-?) A pause. And then, in her head, riotous laughter. Genuine laughter. Angel was whooping. Finally, the sounds died to mental hiccups. (Me?) Gillian was embarra.s.sed. (I shouldn"t have asked. It was just so weird. . . .) (Yeah, wasn"t it.) This time Angel sounded grimly amused. (Well, neve r mind; you"re already late for cla.s.s. The bell rang five minutes ago.) Gilli an coasted through her last two cla.s.ses in a daze. So much had happened today-she felt as if she"d led a full life betwe en waking up and now.
But the day wasn"t over yet.
In her last cla.s.s, studio art, she once again found herself talking to Daryl the Rich Girl. Daryl was the only one of that crowd that took art or journali sm. And in the last minutes before school ended, she regarded Gillian from un der drooping eyelashes.
"You know, there are other rumors going around about you. That you and Da vey-boy have something going behind Tanya"s back. That you meet secretly in the mornings and . . ." Daryl shrugged, pushing back frosted hair with a hand dripping with rings.
Gillian felt jolted awake. "So?"
"So you really should do something about it. Rumors spread fast, and they g row. I know. You want to either deny them, or"-Daryl"s lips .quirked in a s mile-"disarm them."
(Oh, yeah? And just how do I do that?) (Shut up and listen to her, kid. This is one smart cookie.) "If there"re parts that are true, it"s usually best to admit those in public. T hat takes some of the punch out. And it"s always helpful to track down the pers on starting the rumors-if you can."(Tell her you know that. And that you"re going to see Tanya after school.) (Tanya? You mean-?) (Just tell her.) Somehow Gillian gathered herself enough to repeat Angel"s words.
Daryl the Rich Girl looked at her with a new expression of respect. "You"re sharper than I thought. Maybe you didn"t need my help after all."
"No," Gillian said without Angel"s prompting. "I"m always glad for help. It"s- it"s a rough world."
"Isn"t it, though?" Daryl said and raised already arched eyebrows.
(So it was Tanya who spread that stuff about my mom.) Gillian almost stum bled as she trudged out of art cla.s.s. She was tired and bewildered. Someh ow, she"d have thought Tanya was above that.
(She had help. It takes a really efficient system to get a rumor to peak circula tion that fast. But she was the instigator. Turn left here.) (Where am I going?) (You"re gonna catch her coming out of marketing education. She"s alone in th ere right now. The teacher asked to see her after cla.s.s, then unexpectedly h ad to run to the bathroom.) Gillian felt distantly amused. She sensed Angel"s hand in these arrangements .
And when she poked her head inside the marketing ed room, she saw that Ta nya was indeed alone. The tall girl was standing by a cloudy green blackb oard.
"Tanya, we need to talk."
Tanya"s shoulders stiffened. Then she ran a hand across her already perfect dark hair and turned. She looked more like a future executive than ever, wit h her face set in cool lines and her exotic gray eyes running over Gillian i n appraisal. Without Angel, Gillian would have dried up and withered away un der that scrutiny.
Tanya said one word. "Talk."
What followed was more like a play than a conversation for Gillian. She re peated what Angel whispered to her, but she never had any idea what was co ming. The only way to survive was to give herself up completely to his dir ection.
"Look, I know you"re upset with me, Tanya. But I"d like to deal with this wit h a little maturity, okay?" She followed Angel"s instructions over to a desk and brushed absent fingers over its imitation-wood top. "I don"t think there"
s any need for us to act like children."
"And I don"t think I know what you"re talking about."
"Oh, really?" Gillian turned and looked Tanya in the face. "I think you know exactly what I"m talking about." (Angel, I feel just like one of those people in a soap opera-)"Well, you"re wrong. And, as a matter of fact, I happen to be busy-"
"I"m talking about the rumors, Tanya. I"m talking about the stories about my mom. And I"m talking about David."
Tanya stood perfectly still. For a moment she seemed surprised that Gillian was taking such a direct approach. Then her gray eyes hardened with the clea r light of battle.
"All right, let"s talk about David," she said in a pleasant voice, moving tig erishly toward Gillian, "I don"t know about any rumors, but I"d like to hear what you and David were doing this morning. Care to tell me?"
(Angel, she"s actually enjoying this. Look at her! And she"s bigger than me.) (Trust me, kid.) "We weren"t doing anything," Gillian said. She had to tip her chin up to look Tanya in the face. Then she looked aside and shook her head. "All right. I"l l be honest about that. I like David, Tanya. I have ever since he moved in. H e"s good and he"s n.o.ble and he"s honest and he"s sweet. But that doesn"t mean I want to take him away from you. In fact, it"s just the opposite."
She turned and walked away, looking into the distance. "I think David dese rves the best. And I know he really cares about you. And that"s what happe ned this morning-he told me you guys had made a promise to each other. So you see, you"ve got no reason to be suspicious."
Tanya"s eyes were glittering. "Don"t try to pull that. All this ..." She waved a hand to indicate Gillian"s dress and hair. "In one day you turn from Little Miss Invisible to this. And you start prancing around the school like you own it. You can"t pretend you"re not trying to get him."
"Tanya, the way I dress has nothing at all to do with David." Gillian told the lie calmly, facing the chalk-misted blackboard again. "It"s just-something I needed to do. I was-tired of being invisible." She turned her head slightly, n ot enough to see Tanya. "But that"s beside the point. The real issue here is w hat"s best for David. And I think you"re best for him-as long as you treat him fairly."
"And what is that supposed to mean?" Tanya was losing her legendary cool.
She sounded venomous, almost shrill.
"It means no more fooling around with Bruce Faber." (Oh, my G.o.d, Angel!
Bruce Faber? Bruce the Athlete? She"s been fooling around with Bruce Fab er?) Tanya"s voice cracked like a whip. "What are you talking about? What do you know?"
"I"m talking about those nights at the pool parties last summer in Macon"s cabana. While David was up north at his grandma"s. I"m talking about what h appened in Bruce"s car after the Halloween dance." (In a cabana?) There was a silence. When Tanya spoke again, her voice was a sort of icy e xplosion. "How did you find out?"Gillian shrugged. "People who"re good at spreading rumors can be a two-ed ged sword."
"I thought so. That brat Kim! Her and her mouth . . ." Then Tanya"s voice c hanged. It became a voice with claws and Gillian could tell she was moving closer. "I suppose you"re planning to tell David about this?"
"Huh?" For a moment Gillian was too confused to follow Angel"s directions. T hen she got hold of herself. "Oh, of course I"m not going to tell David. Tha t"s why I"m telling you. I just want you to promise that you"re not going to do anything like that anymore. And I"d appreciate it if you"d stop telling people things about my mom-"
"I"ll do worse than that!" Suddenly Tanya was standing right behind Gillian.
Her voice was a yelling hiss. "You have no idea what I"ll do if you try to mess with me, you snotty little midget. You are going to be so sorry-"
"No, I think you"ve done plenty already."
The voice came from the door. Gillian heard it, and in that instant she under stood everything.
CHAPTER 9.
It was David, of course.
Gillian turned around and stared at him, blinking. He was standing just insi de the doorway, his jacket slung over one shoulder, the other hand in his po cket. His jaw was tight, his eyes dark. He was looking at Tanya.
There was a silence.
(How long? How long has he been there, Angel?) (Uhhh, I"d say since round about . . . the beginning.) (Oh, my.) So that"s why Gillian had been so low key and n.o.ble and let Tany a do all the yelling and threatening. They must have come off like Dorothy and the Wicked Witch.
A sense of justice stirred inside Gillian. She made a hesitant move toward D avid.
"David-you don"t understand-"
David shook his head. "I understand just fine. Don"t try to cover for her. It"s better for me to find out."
(Yeah, shut up, minibrain! Now look mildly distressed, slightly awkward. Y ou guess they want to be alone now.) "Uh, I guess you guys want to be alone now."
(Anyway, you have to hurry to get your ride.) "Anyway, I have to hurry to get my ride."
(These aren"t the droids you"re looking for.) "These aren"t-" (I"m going to kill you, Angel!) Fl.u.s.tered, Gillian made one l ast gesture of apology and almost ran for the door.
Outside, she walked blindly. (Angel!)(Sorry, I couldn"t resist. But look at you, kid! Do you know what you"ve don e?) (I guess ... I got rid of Tanya.) As the adrenaline of battle faded, the truth of this was slowly beginning to dawn on her. It brought a hint of glorious wa rmth, a sparkling promise of future happiness.
(Smart kid!) (And-I did it fairly. It was all true, wasn"t it, Angel? She"s really been mes sing around with Bruce?) (Everybody"s been messing around with Bruce. Yes, it was all true.) (And what about Kim? Is she the one who spreads rumors about people?) (Like b.u.t.ter on Eggos.) (I just-she seemed so sweet. When we talked about rumors in the cafeteria s he patted my hand.) (Sure, she"s sweet-to your face. Turn left here.) Gillian found herself emerging from the school building. As she went down the steps she saw three or four cars parked casually in the roundabout. Ma con"s BMW convertible was one. He looked up at her and gave an inviting no d toward the car.
Other people shouted. "Hey, Jill, need a ride?" "We wouldn"t want you to ge t lost in the woods again!"
Gillian stood, feeling like a southern belle. So many people wanting her-it made her giddy. Angel was grandly indifferent (Pick anybody!) and she coul d see Amy"s Geo a little distance away. Amy and Eugene were standing by it, looking up at her. But getting in a car with Eugene Elfred would be disast rous to her new status.
She picked Cory the Party Guy, and the ride home was filled with his nonsto p talk about Macon"s party on Sat.u.r.day. She had trouble getting rid of him at the door. Once she did, she walked up to her bedroom and fell on her bed , arms out. She stared at the ceiling.
(Phew!) It had been the most incredible day of her life.
She lay and listened to the quiet house and tried to gather her thoughts.
The warmth was still percolating inside her, although it was mixed with a c ertain amount of anxiety. She wanted to see David again. She wanted to know how things had tu rned out with Tanya. She couldn"t let herself feel happy until she was sure . . .
"Relax, would you?"
Gillian sat up. The voice wasn"t in her ear, it was beside the bed. Angel was s itting there.
The sight hit her like a physical blow.
She hadn"t seen him since that morning and she"d forgotten how beautiful he was.
His hair was dark golden with paler gold lights shimmering in it. His face was -well-cla.s.sic perfection. Absolutely pure, denned like a sculpture in marble.
His eyes were a violet so glorious it actually hurt to look at it. His express ion was rapt and uplifted . . . until he winked. Then it dissolved into mischi ef.
"Uh, hi," Gillian whispered huskily.
"Hi, kid. Tired?"
"Yeah. I feel . . . used up."
"Well, take a nap, why don"t you? I"ve got places to go anyway."
Gillian blinked. Places? "Angel... I never asked you. What"s heaven like? I m ean, with angels like you, it"s got to be different from most people"s idea.
That meadow I saw-that wasn"t it, was it?"
"No, that wasn"t it. Heaven-well, it"s hard to explain. It"s all in the oscill ation of the spatial-temporal harmonics, you know-what you"d call the inherent vibration of the plane. At a higher vibration everything a.s.sumes a much more complicated harmonic theme. ..." "
You"re making this up, aren"t you?" "Yeah. Actually it"s cla.s.sified. Why do n"t you get some sleep?" Gillian already had her eyes shut.
She was happy when she woke up to smell dinner. But when she got downsta irs, she found only her mother.
"Dad"s not home?"
"No. He called, honey, and left a message for you. He"ll be out of town on bu siness for a while."
"But he"ll be back for Christmas. Won"t he?"
"I"m sure he will."
Gillian didn"t say anything else. She ate the hamburger ca.s.serole her mother served-and noticed that her mother didn"t eat. Afterward, she sat in the kitc hen and played with a fork.
(You okay?) The voice in her ear was a welcome relief. (Angel. Yeah, I"m all right. I was just thinking . . . about how everything started with Mom. It wasn"t always li ke this. She was a teacher at the junior college. . . .) (I know.) (And then-I think it was about five years ago- things just started happening . She started acting crazy. And then she was seeing things-what did I know a bout drinking then? I just thought she was nuts. It wasn"t until Dad started finding empty bottles . . .) (I know.) (I just wish . . . that things could be different.) A pause. (Angel? Do you t hink maybe they could be?) Another pause. Then Angel"s voice was quiet. (I"ll work on it, kid. But, yeah, I think maybe they could be.) Gillian shut her eyes.
After a moment she opened them again. (Angel-how can I thank you? The things you"re doing for me ... I can"t even start to tell you ...) (Don"t mention it. And don"t cry. A cheery face is worth triple A bonds. Bes ides, you have to answer the phone.) (What phone?) The phone rang.
(That phone.) Gillian blew her nose and said a practice "h.e.l.lo" to make sure her voice wa sn"t shaky. Then she took a deep breath and picked up the receiver.
"Gillian?"
Her fingers clenched on the phone. "Hi, David."
"Look, I just wanted to make , sure you were okay. I didn"t even ask you th at when-you know, this afternoon."
"Sure, I"m okay." Gillian didn"t need Angel to tell her what to say to this.
"I can handle myself, you know."
"Yeah. But Tanya can be pretty intense sometimes. After you left she was-wel l, forget that."
He doesn"t want to say anything bad about her, Gillian thought. She said, "I"
m fine."
"It"s just-" She could almost feel the frustration building on the other side of the line. And then David burst out as if something had snapped, "I didn"t k now!"
"What?"
"I didn"t know she was-like that! I mean, she runs the teen helpline and she "s on the Centralia relief committee and the Food Cupboard project and .. .
Anyway, I thought she was different. A good person."
Conscience twinged. "David, I think she is some of the things you thought.