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Chapter 4 ── Correct answer (Who are you?)
── It was something instantaneous.
But in that instant, hundreds of millions of memories flowed into Sora and s.h.i.+ro. For a human, it was something close to "Eternity". They were forced to experience such an absurd amount of time.
In a dream like state, ambiguously as if they were just dozing off…they saw.
■■■
Long, long ago, there was a lone girl. This was even before the world had formed, it was such a long time ago that it was overwhelming.
That girl was a "G.o.d".
But what is a G.o.d? And why was she born? The girl didn"t know. And since she was alone, there was no one who could answer her questions.
Knowledge didn"t exist in that world yet.
The girl had been born to ask "Why" in place of those with no awareness, those with no consciousness. To doubt everything. The girl carried the quintessence of doubt. She took her writing brush and kept asking:
What does it mean "To be"? What is the "World"? What was she then, since she asked those questions?... etc.
No matter what doubts she harbored, there was no one to ask. No matter what hypotheses she thought of, no one answered. She was just a philosopher that kept questioning everything in solitude for eternity. And since she was alone, she didn"t even know what loneliness was.
── She just kind of wanted someone to talk to. So she made 5 small machines.
Observation. a.n.a.lysis. Proof. Response. Four machines to perform those tasks, and one to manage and coordinate them.
In a world where knowledge didn"t exist yet, she decided to try and create knowledge. Her infinite doubts could now be answered by the machine that answered, that was what the girl wished for. However, the machine"s very own knowledge caused them to ask in return:
── What are we? What are you? What is to doubt? etc...
The machines had knowledge, however, even though they had knowledge, they lacked something that the girl had. And since she was alone, even though it was something that the girl had, it was something she couldn"t have known about.
That was why, in that primordial world, the first to have a "heart", the girl, despaired. She didn"t even know what a wish was, she was left without understanding even that. And, at the end of that even more eternal silence, the girl finally thought of a method to answer one of her endless doubts.
The lone girl doubted even her own existence, and in the end──
── She ended up negating herself, she pierced her own "Quintessence".
At the very least, she existed. That was her only answer. It was an answer she obtained in exchange for death, it was a precious answer she held close to her heart...
□□□
But on that day, even that answer was negated.
On a remote hill that would soon be called the "Eastern Federation", under a sky with a red moon that set the stage, in the dead of night, there was a golden fox child that looked like she would die at any time, and the one who doubted everything in this world. The Ten Pledges, the One True G.o.d, established tactics, the inevitable, she doubted anything and everything──
Even so, the lone girl, the girl that should have died, the girl whose "Quintessence" was dozing; asked the fox that had decided that "You can"t go against the established tactic" with a warped smile, a question:
── "Why?" The day she asked that was denied.
── The dozing girl guessed that she hadn"t been able to die.
She had negated herself and pierced her own "Quintessence" with as much power as possible, but even so it wasn"t "Erased", it was just separated──and temporarily deactivated. She despaired, but she wasn"t able to realize that while she dozed, so the girl kept piling on questions.
── "Answer me. What"s thy basis to conclude that thou canst not go against the established tactic?"
It was almost as if she was blaming the one who woke her up from her illusory, but satisfying dream──
The golden fox"s answer was her own condition, her history up to that point was her basis. The girl asked what was her proof that such an extrapolation fallacy was true. The golden fox"s answer was that proof was unnecessary for something as obvious as the strong trampling on the weak. The girl asked the definitions of weak and strong, and proof that proof is unnecessary for obvious things.
It was an endless and fruitless argument, however──
For some reason, even with a dying body, she was laughing. The golden fox daringly stood up, and interrupted her question.
"── This has become so stupid. Hey you, what"s your name?" The fox asked.
The girl thought and answered: "Unknown".
Even though the fox pointed and said "You", even her own self was in doubt. The girl talked about everything: her own "Quintessence", her endless questions, and how in the end she denied herself. Therefore, she never even thought about a name. When the girl finished talking, the fox answered:
"Oh, so you"re nameless then. Well, that doesn"t matter. Then──"
The golden fox deepened her smile as she said that. There was no despair on her face anymore.
"── It would be fine if I just proved proof, right?"
However──
"In order to destroy the established tactic, we"d have to go against that One True G.o.d b.a.s.t.a.r.d… we"d have to change the world itself so it keeps going against the established tactic forever ── I"ll create that world with my own hands as your proof." She wanted to remake the world.
The fox stood up full of enthusiasm, however, the girl didn"t care either way at all. She just wanted to sleep. After all, it was possible to disproof proofs infinitely. The girl made that clear, but the golden fox, displeased from the bottom of her heart, said:
"Are you trying to provoke me? Even if it"s against your will, I"ll be keeping you company"
"Why?" The girl tried to ask, but the fox boldly interrupted her.
She made an arrogant boast:
── She"d unite all the races, and make an "Established tactic" in which no one is sacrificed.
With that, she"d defeat the One True G.o.d, and attain his throne.
"So c"mon 【Aschente】" The fox said as she raised her hand.
────?
But the girl"s answer was just silence.
Both the end of the war and the ten pledges happened while she was inactive. What"s more, since the girl kept denying herself, she was just temporarily weakly active. At any moment, the girl could go into temporary inactivity once again, she didn"t even have her powers as an Old Deus. Past, present, and future; she has always been in a hazy slumber…
"Let me continue. How about we play a little game?"
But the fox kept talking:
"After you win, my body will be your medium until death."
And, with the fox"s big words, dawn came. She threw her body away because it had become useless for her.
"── But once you obtain the Throne of the One True G.o.d you"ll return it, without reservation"
When she heard those words, the girl was surprised. As expected, she didn"t know. The Throne of the One True G.o.d. That referred, without a doubt, to the Suniaster. The Great War in her faint memories had actually ended.
── The Suniaster. An all powerful, all knowing conceptual device.
Certainly, if she had that, even her infinite questions would be answered──
□□□
── And so,
"──── Uwaaaaa thou! Thou, thou, medium! Didst thou deceive me!?"
"Hahaha! The one who got deceived is at fault, that"s the current world"s common sense, right?"
That"s right, if the girl won, she"d use the fox"s body as a medium until she died. And thus, the girl won, however, it was her "Quintessence" what was bound inside the fox. Until the fox died, or perhaps──
"With this, you will remain inside me until I give you the Throne of the One True G.o.d ♪"
The girl"s thoughts were still in disarray, but the fox just kept laughing in a good mood.
── As expected, the girl didn"t realize.
She didn"t notice that she was expressing emotion for the first time.
The G.o.ddess of doubt couldn"t believe even in her own existence, yet encouraged the fox to go against the established tacting without meaning to. And so, both the fox and the girl made their first friend. They were forced to share a body, according to the Pledges, those two couldn"t be separated──
"... Relax, a loss is a loss. I will fulfill my promise." The fox said. It was an unprecedented cheat, she bound the girl"s Quintessence to her own body.
She was gazing at the giant chess pieces on the horizon with shrewd eyes.
"You can keep asking questions. I will tackle as many as possible"
… But for the girl, that was somehow not unpleasant.
"Until you obtain the Suniaster, and stop negating yourself, just watch from inside me."
Just by talking with someone else, she felt… something──
── And thus, the Eastern Federation was born.
But for that, they didn"t use the girl"s powers as an Old Deus, there was not even a need to.
Whenever the fox thought something was impossible, the girl asked why. That was all.
Whenever the fox thought that she couldn"t win against the other races, the girl would ask how she had come to that conclusion.
If the fox lamented about how being unable to use magic was a disadvantage, the girl would ask why that was a disadvantage.
── If the fox gave up on the idea of changing the world, the girl asked why she thought it couldn"t be changed.
The girl who kept asking why became the fox"s advisor, and they created a country in the blink of an eye.
── For a G.o.d, it was the blink of an eye, but for the fox it was something that required 60 years──
□□□
And so, the end came abruptly too.
"... It"s almost time. I"ll finally let you out, thank you for your patience." The once young golden fox said. This was the night after they took the Seiren capital. The golden fox was playing with the War Beast"s race piece in her finger when she made that declaration. The girl, of course, didn"t understand what she meant… but she had a hunch.
"Is it them── those Immanities?"
── The fox had previously apologized to the girl.
Because she didn"t think she"d be able to obtain the Suniaster before her lifespan ended.
── The fox said that she hadn"t been able to find something to end the established tactic, and that she was leaving the match to someone else, however the girl intentionally didn"t mind it, she didn"t understand why she was apologized to either.
Since the beginning, it"s not like she thought that just by controlling all the races she could win against the One True G.o.d. But since those Immanities appeared the fox changed. That"s what the girl thought.
No, did she just go back to how she was in the past? When she thought that she could actually obtain the Suniaster.
"That"s right. It"s not like I"ll "cohabitate" with you forever." She said, and laughed while playing with the Warbeasts" piece.
"In truth, since the designated representatives of the Warbeasts are both you and I, I can"t bet the race piece."
However, the following words were meant to go beyond the girl"s expectations, they surprised her:
"... It"s enough if I die by myself, I will entrust this to the next ones."
"....................."
Did the fox really intend to hand over the Suniaster?
If her lifespan wasn"t enough, the fox would entrust it to someone else, however, the Pledge with the girl was to "be your medium until death". Neither the fox nor the girl had the right to annul that, but what if the fox"s lifespan approached its end──?
"That"s why, before that happens let"s overwrite that Pledge… let"s play one last game"
She proposed to play a game with someone else before the girl disappeared together with the fox"s life, and let them succeed her Pledge. However, the girl refused. The one who promised to find the truth was the fox after all.
However──
"── In that case, I"ll end my life right now."
────
"... I won"t let you die, by any means necessary…"
The fox said with her head hung low, but the girl thought in secret:
── Inside the fox, the girl just existed with no power, however, according to the pledge, for her Quintessence to be succeeded, the fox needed to die. With the fox"s death, the chains of the Pledges would be broken, and the girl would go back to being temporarily inactive due to her self-negation. But after being released from the Pledges, she"d have a bit of time. During that time, she could use her powers as an Old Deus to hold the fox"s soul, think of a way to grant her eternal life, and then return her soul.
In that case, they"d play a game as the fox proposed, and once the girl won, she"d use the Pledges once more to house her Quintessence inside the fox.
"... I shall accept… However, I won"t accept thy death, medium."
And that was why the girl accepted the game, and declared that she"d use all her power in it. What she didn"t say was that she didn"t have any intention to hand over her Quintessence to anyone else but the fox────
□□□
And thus, the girl was finally released from the chains of the Pledges.
So with the girl"s advent, or in other words, with the fox"s death, her G.o.dly powers were released. Then, the Immanities, the Dhampir, and each of the fox"s companions were deciding the rules according to their own circ.u.mstances. It was there that the girl realized.
── After the pledge ended, and she grasped the girl"s life, she realized that she was in an unfavorable match, and she couldn"t even get out of it.
Then the girl understood.
── Since the very beginning, the fox had absolutely no intention to die nor to hand to hand over her Quintessence to anyone else.
She simply wanted to throw the girl away. The girl was betrayed once again.
The betrayal was:
That if someone reached the top, then the girl"s Quintessence would be erased instead.
That she made the partic.i.p.ants bet a Race Piece each, and…
"... You were very patient. Even so, I believe in you" The soul the girl was holding said.
"Thou would say that even as thou are plotting to betray me. Is believing just a joke to thou?"
And that whether she won or lost, there were rules protecting the fox… that was all.
── The girl didn"t understand why she"d do such a thing, however:
"I"ll have you think that… It"s about time you stood up by yourself."
That"s right, using this game, she"d make her think that proofs are a joke.
In other words:
"Believing in the Traitor… It"s about time you also realize that doubting and believing are equal."
── If she was able to make the Traitor reach the goal, her Quintessence wouldn"t be erased. But either way, she"d probably just go back to being temporarily inactive.
And so, the girl was watching those that started the game, those that"d try to kill her… or rather some of them, and thinks about her doubts:
── Just where did she go wrong? However, she understood.
The Suniaster. The all-knowing vessel that can only be obtained by gathering all the Race Pieces and winning against the One True G.o.d.
── That"s just perfect. In that case, she"d start by obtaining the Race Pieces of five races. She"d a.s.sume the Throne of the One True G.o.d, and obtain the answers to all her questions… If she did that──
If, she… did that──
"... I should understand… why she threw me away…" The girl thought, but she didn"t understand what that meant. Nor the meaning of her shaking hands, or the meaning of her crestfallen expression, or the true character of the ones in the spiral──
What is to believe? There"s no way you can prove anything. If you say that you can, if you say that you can answer then──
── She thought like that even now, that was the answer she was satisfied with.
"If you can show me… then show me." Even that way of thinking too──
■■■
── And, as if they were waking up from a daydream, with their thought still not completely separated, Sora and s.h.i.+ro looked at their surroundings. Looking once around they, and Miko who was standing next to them, saw the same thing. The magnificent land that spiraled to the heavens just a little while ago, was nowhere to be found. It was just a dark room.
It was a small, gloomy, cold, mechanical ── they were in the center of a s.p.a.ce that seemed to reject everything in the world. And there was a lonely, nameless Old Deus hugging her knees.
In there… in that, the siblings saw a familiar place, a familiar scenery.
It was that place, their previous world.
They were pretending they didn"t see anything. Neither the room they were trapped in nor those two peas in a pod.
"Ye boaster who answered with "doubt" when asked what believing was…." She said in a frightened, trembling voice. It was an appearance that was quite far from the majesty of a G.o.d.
But Sora and s.h.i.+ro… knew.
──That this was this Old Deus" true form.
By watching that memory ── No, even if they hadn"t watched it, Sora and s.h.i.+ro would have known.
When the game started ── The first time they saw her, Sora and s.h.i.+ro knew.
They knew because when both Sora and s.h.i.+ro peeked into her eyes, they realized they were very familiar. Those familiar eyes really didn"t suit the transcendental race ── the Old Dei. That was because they were the eyes that both Sora and s.h.i.+ro saw in the mirror in the past.
What was there was neither a person nor a G.o.d, but someone who got betrayed, hurt… They were the eyes of someone that no matter how hard they struggled, they didn"t know what to do, or how to live. Therefore:
"── Just what is a G.o.d…" She simply asked. It was like she was begging, imploring, or perhaps, blaming them.
── She was born without understanding anything. Without desiring anything.
Not knowing anything, she was forced to ask questions eternally.
She lived without knowing anything, she died to try to know something.
She was awakened without knowing anything, she was used, tricked, deceived, betrayed...
And what she was told in the end, what she was missing was that: "Doubting is believing" ? In that case, what was the meaning of the G.o.ddess of Doubt?
She was asking the persons that seemed to be having fun, as if she resented them. That was why she had those eyes,
"Hmm… Well you see it"s something that s.h.i.+ro… No, it would be better if you heard it from Miko-san"
Sora cannot help but look away, towards her sister, and towards Miko.
"We came this far, but I have a confession to make: There were always things that we didn"t know." Sora said, and glared at Miko with reproachful eyes.
Indeed, Sora had seen through the real victory conditions of this game. The things that they hadn"t been able to read through, the basic mistakes, and even that loss had been mostly explained already.
But even so──
"Why did the Old Deus play this game?. This is the only thing we never understood."
──Well, originally Sora thought that a reason to play the game, or even an objective were unnecessary.
Prizes, money or even a simple trophy, they"d play a game simply because they wanted to, nothing more, nothing less. If there was an opportunity to play a game with a literally G.o.dly gamer, and they didn"t take it, they"d rather ask the meaning and objective of not playing.
However, maybe that was not the prevailing view. That thought became more prevalent these last few days, until the conceited Sora finally started to doubt.
He realized that Miko had set up the Old Deus and forced her to play the game.
── In that case, what did she use as bait to set her up?
The only thing he didn"t understand was why the reason they seeked such a large scale game, however──
"... I think it"s unlikely, but…" Sora takes a breath.
"── My friend betrayed and shamelessly said: "Even so, I still believe", but what"s up with that!? Believe, even though she hurt me so much!? What is believing!? I cannot believe, if you say that you can, then prove it with your lives!! If not, then I"ll become all-knowing and all-powerful and get the answer myself────!!"
He even mixed in body language and hand gestures, it was a true to life performance──
And so, he changed back.
"... Or something like that. I think it"s unlikely, but was it really just something like that?"
"Hahaha…. Right? She"s really a difficult child huh?" Miko answered with a foolish laugh, so Sora and s.h.i.+ro directed a freezing gaze towards her.
── No, the question was rhetorical, but Sora also understood. The game had already ended, the memories that were levied before had already returned. According to those memories, before the game she had certainly asked: "What is to believe?".
… Not knowing what they were being asked, they naturally answered with: "to doubt". They were saying that doubt and trust were the same thing, but for some reason, they were asked to prove it.
It seemed that she intended to use the prisoner"s dilemma to disprove it. Sora read through that, and he himself proposed:
"How about not erasing the Quintessence if the Traitor reaches the goal?"
── In the first place, it was a game built on the premise that they"d betray each other.
The prisoner"s dilemma originally was meant just to make fun of a shrewd move, but──
Who"d have thought. The Detective"s true motive was just to test the Prisoner"s trust! Normally that"d be unthinkable──!!
Like that, and with eyes resembling those of a dead fish, Sora sighs.
"... Adults are really geniuses, making the world so complicated"
"Right? One can only be amazed～ kuhahaha!"
"Why are you laughing?!! Miko-san, you are also part of the side making things complicated, right!?"
"... In the first place… this was all… Miko-san"s fault… right?"
Sora and s.h.i.+ro cannot help but scream, Miko lowers her eyes with self-depreciation, and laughs.
"... That"s right. The ones making things complicated are hopeless boring people like me."
── As if it was responding to that masochism, that dark place creaked. And, once that creak echoed once, the master of that s.p.a.ce, the squatting girl, swayed once. She was flickering like a candle"s flame, she was becoming faint and indistinct.
"... C"mon, I think I told you already, but the real thing starts now."
── Since Sora and s.h.i.+ro had seen the girl"s memories, they knew what was happening. Since her pledge with Miko had been severed, she was negating herself again. Her temporarily released, limited G.o.dly powers, were decaying without end.
"The Quintessence that was tied to me by the Pledges, returned to that child. However──"
At this rate, she"s become temporarily inactive again… she"d be a sacrifice. With this, Miko calmly "threatens" them with a warped smile:
"Even if we were the ones who made it complicated, you were the ones who released it ── It looks like we lost to you♪"
"── I know that I shouldn"t be the one to say this, but Miko-san, you have a really bad personality…"
"Gamers should have bad personalities, and what"s more, I"m a fox… However──"
But, she changed her att.i.tude. She lowered her voice and her eyes, and continued:
"I made a mistake… But, I don"t know what I should have done, even now"
So that was it, as long as the Old Deus remained inside Miko, she wouldn"t disappear. However, in the end that was just because she was bound by the Pledges. The girl didn"t have any awareness, she didn"t obtain any answers, she didn"t even notice anything── and when the chains of the Pledges were broken just now, this happened.
The two of them are one. That part resembled them, Sora and s.h.i.+ro thought.
But there"s also one part that is definitely different.
"── Even so, I want to save that girl"
Did she still have the qualifications to call herself her friend? She doesn"t know, but Miko says:
"Even though I held her hand, I want that girl to be able to choose to grasp someone"s hand by her own will. If I don"t know the way to do that… If I cannot do that──"
And, inside the s.p.a.ce that was finally cracking, Miko decisively announced:
"── I"ll still do it, even if I have to use someone who can. Even if I have to involve unrelated people."
Even if the hand she grasped was not her own──
"If I can"t even throw away such stubbornness, I won"t become an adult, I"ll be just some blockhead── well, say what you will"
── Even if they cursed at her, even if they despised her, even so, there was one thing she wouldn"t concede.
If she believed that there was someone able to do it, then it didn"t matter what they thought. When they saw Miko say that, Sora and s.h.i.+ro just made a wry smile.
"In that case, I"ll say it as many times as necessary: Don"t underestimate us. It"s but an easy task."
"... For not throwing away… that temper stubbornness… I send you… my compliments."
── Since the very beginning, Sora and s.h.i.+ro had absolutely no intention of letting the Old Deus die. There is no need to threaten, and also, no need to ask.
Or rather…
"Is it really fine for such an easy game to be the final game? This is so disorganized～!"
Sora and s.h.i.+ro sighed, amazedly as they approached the girl────