I’m not dropping this novel, but work is crazy busy so updates will be a bit irregular.
Double chapters for Lollee. Thank you for your wonderful review and sorry for the delay ..
Lollee .. you just got the two most angstiest chapters dedicated to you. Enjoy !! Come back for chapter 34 tomorrow, same time.
If you want chapters dedicated to you, the link for the review. But do be a bit patient for the dedicated chapters..
Chapter 33 – The end of fantasies
The aroma of the milk in the coffee hit my nose
Ling Ling had told me that lattes weren"t as bitter, but this was my first latte and it tasted really bitter…
But I liked the bitterness. Sometimes it could be refreshing.
I had studied psychology. How would I not get what Yu Yan was hinting at. This woman was really intelligent.
I put down the coffee cup and exhaled deeply." You mean he can lie so well that he can beat the polygraph?"
No matter whether Yu Yin"s words were true or false, to be able to beat a polygraph, a person had to be a psychopath; a person who was unable to feel love, emotional pain, even the warmth of a hug. I knew the man. He felt emotions alright.
Yu Yin just pursed her lips in answer
" Since you already believe him , I have nothing to say…"
I did not want to continue playing this kind of psychological game with her.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Go ahead."
" I can understand why Ye Zhengchen lied to me .." In order not to hurt her, I didn"t elaborate on my remark. I knew that he would lie to me because he cared about me and did not want to hurt me
" But why did you help him conceal the truth? On the very first day that we met at the convenience store, you could have apologized to me. Told me that Ye Zhengchen was your fiancé. Ask me to leave him. Why didn"t you ?"
" …" Yu Yin was speechless for a moment Then she sighed
" I have always seen you as a friend. But I know you did not. Your coming to the convenience store to buy things, you driving me to the hospital, taking care of me , taking me to your home for tea… none of these things are coincidental." I inhaled deeply to calm myself. Then I continued, " Why would you try to reveal the truth in such a complicated manner?"
She sipped her coffee, then started putting sugar in the cup, one spoon after another. When I was sure she would not answer, she opened her mouth.
" He has lost his mind. If I told you about our relationship, I wasn"t sure he would stay with me.." she paused, unable to complete the sentence.
" Before I fell in love with him, I already knew the kind of person he was. I expected that there would be such a day. I love him and will not force him to accept me."
Yu Yin"s answer really surprised me. Her loneliness and her sadness shattered the confidence I had.
I would rather she scolded me, asking me to leave Ye Zhengchen for good. I did not want to show her my confidence in our relationship when she was so fragile.
How deep was her love that she could keep smiling in front of the woman who had stolen her love?
How many tears had she shed behind this mask of a smiling face ?
She loved him much more than I did.
A strong sense of guilt a.s.sailed me
" What do you want me to do ?"
I expected her to say , " Leave him" or " give him back to me."
"I once read in a book that, from a purely physiological point of view, there is no such thing called love in this world. This so called love is just the secretion of a chemical that makes a man and a woman attractive to each other. But this chemical only lasts in the human body for a year."
A year, three hundred and sixty five days…
This time the coffee in my hand splashed a bit.
Yu Yin looked at my coffee cup and finally stopped putting sugar in her cup. She took another sip and continued, "One year isn"t long. I can afford it.."
But I could not.
I raised my eyes and looked at her.
" Bo Bing, I can give you a year. I will not bother you and I hope you will not bother me …"
She meant that she would give me her fiancé and that we would not interfere with each other
This was the first time I had heard of such a request.
Did she think we were members of the emperor"s harem, and she was the empress allowing the concubine some leeway ?
What did she think of herself ?
"I think I have finished what I had to say", Yu Yin stood up, ready to leave. I followed her.
"Why don"t you leave him? With your looks, you will get someone much better than him."
Yu Yin gave me a strange, pitying look. "One day, you will understand that sometimes a woman needs to open one eye and close the other."
I had heard this sentence before in a popular TV series. "To maintain your love, you need to open both eyes. To maintain your marriage, sometimes you need to close one eye and keep one eye open."
Why did this sentence suddenly come to my mind?
While I was still pondering over this, Yu Yin had left. Maybe because she had left in a hurry, she had left behind a file.
I had no intention of spying on anyone else"s private stuff, but intuitively, I knew that this was no ordinary file. Yu Yin had left it behind so I would see it.
After hesitating for a while, I went ahead and opened it.
Immediately I wished I had never done so.
A bright red marriage certificate, almost the color of blood, fluttered out of my nerveless fingers to the ground below
The other doc.u.ments, visa doc.u.ments, bank papers, mobile phone contracts - all with the s.p.a.ces in "husband" and "wife" filled up scattered to the ground as well.
I was sitting on the chair like a statue, but there was an earthquake happening in my mind, destroying everything I have ever trusted and valued, leaving only debris behind
There were no tears. No anger. Under extreme circ.u.mstances, people just became numb..
A pair of purple high heels appeared within the sphere of my vision. Slender hands picked up the papers and rearranged them in the file
I opened my mouth, trying hard to say something but nothing came out.
Finally, I spoke. " This isn"t true and I will not believe this."
" If that makes you feel better, go ahead"
Yu Yin straightened up after picking the papers.
I looked up and saw a hazy image of Yu Yin. I wasn"t sure if this was my illusion, but she seemed to laugh. Her laugh was a pleasant sound
Before leaving, she said one sentence, " I dont want to lie to you. He has genuinely fallen in love with you. For you, he would do anything, including filing for divorce. I had no choice…"
I dont remember how long it took for me to walk out of the cafe. Twilight had fallen, but in my vision, everything was pitch dark.
My phone rang. I searched in my bag for a long time before I could find it.
It was Ye Zhengchen, calling me because he wanted to take me out to dinner as agreed.
I didnt say anything. He said, " I"m waiting downstairs for you."
…… …
Just outside the door of the medical department, a man was standing under the Gingko tree, his posture as straight as the tree.
His eyes locked on me. The unruly wind tore at his shirt.
I looked at him closely till I recognised the man. I went running to him
Under the stars, his image was difficult to recognise
A wave of emotion undulated through my heart and I stretched out my arms and clung to him tightly.
I buried my face in his warm chest..
Momentarily caught offguard, he finally reached out and patted my back.
" What happened? Did the professor scold you again?"
Yu Yin was wrong, He was very empathetic. So much so that he was a man any woman would find difficult to resist.
I looked up to him and silently shook my head
He bowed down to touch my lips and although I could see it coming , I didnt avoid it this time
Surrounded by the aroma of Gingko , he took me in his arms and kissed me lightly on my forehead.
The moon fell on his face and I could see that he was smiling happily.
I smiled back at him.
" While coming here, I kept asking myself to what end would I compromise for the sake of love.."
He couldn"t understand where I was going and listened carefully.
" If you have a fiancé, I can forgive you, I can wait for you. If you took her to bed, I can justify to myself that it was a moment of impulse. Even if you love her, I think I wouldn"t accuse you of anything. But what I cannot forgive…"
I was afraid that he would not let me continue, so I slowly said, " ..that you are married."
His smile disappeared. I couldn"t tell if his face actually paled or whether it was just a trick of light.
I waited for some explanation from him. I waited for him to tell me that he had no relationship with Yu Yin
But this time, he was silent
When I most wanted him to lie to me, he decided he didnt want to fool me anymore..
" Why aren"t you saying anything?" I looked up at him and grabbed his arm tightly.
" Tell me this isn"t true. Tell me you aren"t married."
If he told me this, I had made up my mind that I would believe him.
I would believe that the certificate was a forgery, and that all the other doc.u.ments were faked.
As long as he told me , " I am not married to Yu Yin."
"I"m sorry!"
Darkness engulfed my vision.