Sometimes, though, he regretted the reputation he"d gotten. It had been bad enough in the old days--the pre-1971 days when Malone had thought he was just lucky. Burris had called him a Boy Wonder then, when he"d cracked three difficult cases in a row. Being just lucky had made it a little tough to live with the Boy Wonder label--after all, Malone thought, it wasn"t actually as if he"d done anything.
But since 1971 and the case of the Telepathic Spy, things had gotten worse. Much worse. Now Malone wasn"t just lucky any more. Instead, he could teleport and he could even foretell the future a little, in a dim sort of way. He"d caught the Telepathic Spy that way, and when the case of the Teleporting Juvenile Delinquents had come up he"d been a.s.signed to that one too, and he"d cracked it. Now Burris seemed to think of him as a kind of G.o.d, and gave him all the tough dirty jobs.
And if he wasn"t just lucky any more, Malone couldn"t think of himself as a Fearless, Heroic FBI Agent, either. He just wasn"t the type. He was--well, talented. That was the word, he told himself: talented. He had all these talents and they made him look like something spectacular to Burris and the other FBI men. But he wasn"t, really. He hadn"t done anything really tough to get his talents; they"d just happened to him.
n.o.body, though, seemed to believe that. He heaved a little sigh and stepped into the waiting elevator.
There were, after all, he thought, compensations. He"d had some good times, and the talents did come in handy. And he did have his pick of the vacation schedule lately. And he"d met some lovely girls--
And besides, he told himself savagely as the elevator shot upward, he wasn"t going to do anything except return to his office and read some reports and listen to some tapes. And then he was going to go home and sleep all night, peacefully. And in the morning Mitch.e.l.l was going to call him up and tell him that the computer-secretaries needed nothing more than a little repair. He"d say they were getting old, and he"d be a little pathetic about it; but it wouldn"t be anything serious.
Malone would send out orders to get the machines repaired, and that would be that. And then the next case would be something both normal and exciting, like a bank robbery or a kidnapping involving a gorgeous blonde who would be so grateful to Malone that--
He had stepped out of the elevator and gone down the corridor without noticing it. He pushed at his own office door and walked into the outer room. The train of thought he had been following was very nice, and sounded very attractive indeed, he told himself.
Unfortunately, he didn"t believe it. His prescient ability, functioning with its usual efficient aplomb, told Malone that things would not be better, or simpler, in the morning. They would be worse, and more complicated.
They would be quite a lot worse.
And, as usual, that prescience was perfectly accurate.
II
The telephone, Malone realized belatedly, had had a particularly nasty-sounding ring. He might have known it would be bad news.
As a matter of fact, he told himself sadly, he had known.
"Nothing at all wrong?" he said into the mouthpiece. "Not with any of the computers?" He blinked. "Not even one of them?"
"Not a thing," Mitch.e.l.l said. "I"ll be sending a report up to you in a little while. You read it; we put them through every test, and it"s all detailed there."
"I"m sure you were very thorough," Malone said helplessly.
"Of course we were," Mitch.e.l.l said. "Of course. And the machines pa.s.sed every single test. Every one. Malone, it was beautiful."
"Goody," Malone said at random. "But there"s got to be something--"
"There is, Malone," Fred said. "There is. I think there"s definitely something odd going on. Something funny. I mean peculiar, not humorous."
"I thought so," Malone put in.
"Right," Fred said. "Malone, try and relax. This is a hard thing to say, and it must be even harder to hear. But--"
"Tell me," Malone said. "Who"s dead? Who"s been killed?"
"I know it"s tough, Malone," Fred went on.
"Is everybody dead?" Malone said. "It can"t be just one person, not from that tone in your voice. Has somebody a.s.sa.s.sinated the entire Senate? Or the President and his Cabinet? Or--"
"It"s nothing like that, Malone," Fred said, in a tone that implied that such occurrences were really rather minor. "It"s the machines."
"The machines?"
"That"s right," Fred said grimly. "After we checked them over and found they were in good shape, I asked for samples of both the input and the output of each machine. I wanted to do a thorough job."
"Congratulations," Malone said. "What happened?"
Fred took a deep breath. "They don"t agree," he said.
"They don"t?" Malone said. The phrase sounded as if it meant something momentous, but he couldn"t quite figure out what. In a minute, he thought confusedly, it would come to him. But did he want it to?
"They definitely do not agree," Fred was saying. "The correlation is erratic; it makes no statistical sense. Malone, there are two possibilities."
"Tell me about them," Malone said. He was beginning to feel relieved.
To Fred, the malfunction of a machine was more serious than the murder of the entire Congress. But Malone couldn"t quite bring himself to feel that way about things.
"First," Fred said in a tense tone, "it"s possible that the technicians feeding information to the machines are making all kinds of mistakes."
Malone nodded at the phone. "That sounds possible," he said. "Which ones?"
"All of them," Fred said. "They"re all making errors--and they"re all making about the same number of errors. There don"t seem to be any real peaks or valleys, Malone; everybody"s doing it."
Malone thought of the Varsity Drag and repressed the thought. "A bunch of fumbleb.u.ms," he said. "All fumbling alike. It does sound unlikely, but I guess it"s possible. We"ll get after them right away, and--"
"Wait," Fred said. "There is a second possibility."
"Oh," Malone said.
"Maybe they aren"t mistakes," Fred said. "Maybe the technicians are deliberately feeding the machine with wrong answers."
Malone hated to admit, even to himself, but that answer sounded a lot more probable. Machine technicians weren"t exactly picked off the streets at random; they were highly trained for their work, and the idea of a whole crew of them starting to fumble at once, in a big way, was a little hard to swallow.
The idea of all of them sabotaging the machines they worked on, Malone thought, was a tough one to take, too. But it had the advantage of making some sense. People, he told himself dully, will do nutty things deliberately. It"s harder to think of them doing the same nutty things without knowing it.
"Well," he said at last, "however it turns out, we"ll get to the bottom of it. Frankly, I think it"s being done on purpose."
"So do I," Fred said. "And when you find out just who"s making the technicians do such things--when you find out who gives them their orders--you let me know."
"Let you know?" Malone said. "But--"
"Any man who would give false data to a perfectly innocent computer,"
Fred said savagely, "would ... would--" For a second he was apparently lost for comparisons. Then he finished: "Would kill his own mother."
He paused a second and added, in an even more savage voice: "And then lie about it!"
The image on the screen snapped off, and Malone sat back in his chair and sighed. He spent a few minutes regretting that he hadn"t chosen, early in life, to be a missionary to the Fiji Islanders, or possibly simply a drunken b.u.m without any trouble, and then the report Mitch.e.l.l had mentioned arrived. Malone picked it up without much eagerness, and began going through it carefully.
It was beautifully typed and arranged; somebody on Mitch.e.l.l"s team had obviously been up all night at the job. Malone admired the work, without being able to get enthusiastic about the contents. Like all technical reports, it tended to be boring and just a trifle obscure to someone who wasn"t completely familiar with the field involved. Malone and cybernetics were not exactly bosom buddies, and by the time he finished reading through the report he was suffering from an extreme case of _ennui_.