She drew a breath. "It"s an old picture. From college. My hair was longer,for one thing, and I was much thinner."
Of course Jimmy would remember his mommy, she rea.s.sured herself as she jumpedup to return to the window.
"Maybe I should have had you pick up a hamburger when you went out forgroceries," she murmured, leaning closer to the window in an effort to seeheadlights at the far end of the block. "Jimmy always liked hamburgers-" Shebroke off, her heart taking off suddenly as a dark-colored pickup trucksuddenly came into view below. Even before it slowed she knew.
"Oh, G.o.d, they"re here," she whispered, her gaze riveted to the truck turninginto the residents" parking lot.
Flynn surged to his feet and hurried to join her by the window. Her heartthumping wildly, she watched Grady park next to Flynn"s vintage XKE, thenclimb out. He paused to grab a couple of bags from the back, then circledaround to open the pa.s.senger door.
Her breath dammed in her throat. "There he is," she exclaimed eagerly as aboy climbed down. "Flynn, it"s Jimmy. Oh G.o.d, it"s really my baby." Shepressed closer, desperate to see her child"s face. But she was too far away tomake out his features. "He"s gotten so tall." Her voice broke, and she bit herlip. "He"s all arms and legs."
Beside her, Flynn cleared his throat. "Looks like the kid hates haircuts asmuch as his old man does."
Riachoked out a laugh, but her gaze remained glued to the man and the boy walking toward the entrance to the building. They were so much alike, bothlong and lanky, with the same wide shoulders and loping walk.
"I"m so scared, Flynn," she whispered when they disappeared from view.
He slipped a brotherly arm around her shoulders and gave her a quick squeezebefore he let her go again. In unison they turned to face the front door.
Grady had never been insideRia"s new place. Never even driven by, althoughhe"d had the new address scrawled in his Rolodex next to her new phone number.A couple of times when he"d found himself in the area, he"d been tempted tostop by, just to make sure she was settling in.
Like she would actually let him in, he thought bitterly. It was a decentneighborhood, a mix of town houses and single-family, moderately expensivehomes. The area had average crime stats, mostly break and enter. Just in case,he"d had a quiet talk with the desk sergeant in charge of scheduling, and, inthe way of cops everywhere, had let it be known he"d consider it a personalfavor if the guys on the street kept a close watch on this particular complex.Specifically the pretty, dark-haired lady in Unit B in Building 2. And in theway of cops, the sergeant had understood that in granting that favor he wasent.i.tled to a favor in return.
So far Sgt.Gruen hadn"t called in the marker. Maybe he never would. Copsdidn"t take kindly to attacks on one of their own.
"Nice place, huh?" he said as he guided the reluctant child up the steps tothe second floor. "Real cla.s.sy."
Jimmy grunted something unintelligible, his gaze fixed on the carpetedrisers. Talk about stubborn; this scruffy six-year-old with hot, angry eyescould give lessons to a barnyard mule. In the three days since Grady hadwalked into that small pink bungalow in Calexico-and d.a.m.n near lost it infront of a roomful of strangers when he"d recognized his son-Jimmy hadn"tvoluntarily said more than a couple of dozen words to him. This from the kidwho had once started his day chattering about everything and anything, rarelystopping until he fell into bed at night.
He glanced down at the unhappy little boy. "Your mom is pretty emotional, soshe"s probably going to cry all over you," he told the boy as they headed upthe carpeted stairs leading to the second floor. "When you"re older, you"llrealize women do that a lot. Sometimes at the darnedest times. Best thing todo is just suck it up and let her vent."
The boy flicked him a sullen look. "She"s not my mom," he grumbled in a surlytone that set Grady"s teeth on edge. "I don"t know why I have to be in thisstupid old place, anyway."
"Because this is where you belong."
At least part of the time. They hadn"t worked out a custody agreement in thedivorce settlement. He"d had to fight to getRia to accept half of theira.s.sets, though he would have willingly given her everything he owned. But noway would he give up access to his son.
When they reached the landing, Grady put a hand on the boy"s shoulder anddrew him to a stop. When he had the kid"s undivided attention, he croucheddown so they were face-to-face, eye to eye.
He hated the defiance he saw there, but he understoodit. Maybe he evenrespected it. In Jimmy"s world, he was the bad guy, the stranger who"d takenhim away from the parents he loved. The boy was fighting back the only way hecould.
"No matter what anyone has said, youare my son. All you have to do is look atmy face, then look in the mirror. Your name isn"t Steven Wilson. It"s Jimmy.Jimmy Hardin." He kept his voice soft, but with enough bite to make the pointstick. "Maybe you don"t want to believe that, but it"s as true as true canbe."
Jimmy"s eyes flashed. "It"s not! My mom and dad wouldn"t lie to me! You"rethe one who"s lying. You put them in jail, and Ihate you!" He tried to jerkaway, but Grady wrapped a hand around the boy"s bony shoulder to keep himrooted.
"Think a minute, son. I"ve explained about the man who had you kidnapped andwhy. Tomorrow, your mom and I will show you the videos we took of you when youwere a baby." The memories he"d locked away came flooding out. "After we tookyou to the circus on your third birthday, you announced that you were going tobe a clown when you grew up. Clowns made people happy, you said. And happy wasa good thing. You said your name wasn"t Jimmy anymore because that wasn"t aclown"s name. So your mom and I started calling youJimbo ."
Something flickered in the boy"s eyes before he dropped his gaze. "My name isSteven Allen Wilson. You can"t make me say it isn"t."
In spite of the bravado, his lower lip trembled a little, and he clamped itstill between his teeth. Grady had to clench his jaw to keep from begging theboy to forgive him for pushing too hard too fast. Patience, he remindedhimself. He andRee had gotten their son through colic and a h.e.l.lish series ofear infections, and they"d get through this.
"It"s okay to be scared, and it"s okay to be mad at me. You can even hate meif it makes you feel better-although I hope you won"t, because I love you."
Jimmy started at that, his eyes widening visibly, as though the concept wasforeign to him. d.a.m.n, Grady thought, clamping down hard on the need to swearlong and hard. Couldn"t those pieces of human garbage have spared a fewminutes to show a lonely little boy some affection?
"I love you," he repeated more softly, and with more force, just in case theboy was having trouble getting his mind around the idea. "And your mom lovesyou, too. So much she was like to die of grief when you were taken from us.Which is why I want you to be real polite when you meet her."
He waited a beat while the boy absorbed that. While he waited, he toldhimself it would be all right. He andRia had had Jimmy for three solid years.Sweet, happy years when the big old house was filled with laughter. Somewherein the boy"s psyche the memories of those years were waiting.
Still, he wasn"t about to kid himself. It was going to take time to get pastthe lies theWilsons had fed him.
Set limits of acceptable behavior and stick to them,the therapist hadadvised. Children needed boundaries. Especially children dealing withlife-altering situations. When everything else was shifting and changingaround them, a child needed a lifeline to hang on to. Something solid andreliable. And safe.
Grady had to admit it made a weird sort of sense. He"d been heading down along road to some serious trouble until his father had laid down the law. Insome perverse way he and his dad had been closer after that.
But d.a.m.n it was hard. Instead of playing hardball with the boy, he wanted tos.n.a.t.c.h up his son and hold tight.
"Are we straight on this, son?" he asked quietly when, finally, Jimmy met hissteady gaze again.
It wasn"t really a nod, more like a flicker of his eyelashes, but pressingthe boy for more would only serve to dent the kid"s pride. Most likely it waspretty stiff. Had to be, he decided as he stood. The boy was a Hardin, wasn"the?
Chapter 4.
Riaheard voices outside her door, then an impatient knock. Her heart startedslamming like crazy, and her knees jellied.
"Oh, G.o.d, I thought I was handling this so well, but now ... I"m petrified,"she whispered, clutching Flynn"s arm.
"Hang in, Sis. It"ll be okay." Flynn gave her another quick squeeze, an evenquicker grin, and then strode quickly to the door. He paused, braced hisshoulders and opened the door.
Flynn was betweenRia and the boy, so all she saw were the frayed hems offaded jeans and boy-size, scuffed high-tops that looked much too big for herbaby. Suddenly she couldn"t seem to breathe.
"Hey, Bro, welcome back," Flynn said, his voice rough.
"Thanks, kid." Grady cleared his throat. "Jim, this big ugly guy here is yourUncle Flynn."
"Hi-ya,Jimbo ." Flynn"s voice was very gentle, very gruff. "I sure am happyto see you."
The boy mumbled something she didn"t catch. Apparently Flynn did, however,because she saw him exchange a quick look with Grady who shook his head.
"d.a.m.ned if he doesn"t look exactly like the picture you sent out," Flynnmuttered, rubbing the back of his neck. "Mom is gonna be flat-out amazed."
"Hear that, Jim? Uncle Flynn here thinks you and me look alike."
"Don"t, neither. I look like my grandpa Wilson. Mama said."
Mama? she thought as she took a few steps forward. As though sensing herapproach, Flynn stepped away from the door. Grady dropped a hand on the boy"sshoulder and guided him over the threshold.
Joy burst inside her as she whispered his name. The boy jerked his head inher direction.
"h.e.l.lo, baby." Her voice was a thread.
"Say h.e.l.lo to your mom, Jim." Though Grady addressed his son, his gaze was onher.
Instead of speaking, Jimmy dropped his gaze, determined, it seemed, to ignoreher. She understood his feeling all too well. She"d been deposited on hershare of doorsteps in the middle of the night, too. As she"d done then, he wa.s.shutting out what he couldn"t change.
"Are you hungry?" Mindful of her own miserable unhappiness whenever she"d hadto adjust to a new set of foster parents, she kept her tone light and hervoice quiet. "I can fix you a peanut b.u.t.ter sandwich or maybe some cocoa andcookies. I have oatmeal with icing." Those had been his favorites. Maybe theystill were.
He looked at her then, his expression closed, his eyes sullen. "You got abathroom? I gotta take a leak."
"Remind me to have a talk with you about your language," Grady mutteredbeforeRia had a chance to reply. Beside her, Flynn made a valiant effort tostifle a grin.
Riaignored them both. "Through that door there and down the hall, sweetie.Second door on the left. The light switch is on your right."
Jimmy flicked her a wary glance before heading off down the hall. In thesudden silence, she heard the door close and the lock click.
"Reminds me of the time you got your mouth washed out with soap for sayingsomething graphic in front of Great Aunt Marvel," Flynn mused, his grin thedevil"s own. "Mom said you foamed at the mouth for a week."
"Mom"s pulling your chain, Little Brother," Grady muttered before turning toclose the front door.
Tension radiated from him like a dark, smoldering aura.Ria felt it, too,sizzling along her nerve endings, like the feeling she had when a suddensummer storm rumbled in over the lake. It was always that way now, when thetwo of them were in the same room, which was one of the reasons she turneddown more invitations to family gatherings than she accepted.
As though he felt it, too, Flynn glanced her way and winked. Katie was wrong,she thought. Grady"s brother was anything but shallow.
She thanked him with a shaky grin, but the nervous energy that had beenbuilding for hours was making her feel light-headed. So much had happened sofast.
"Ready for that wine now, Sis?"
She rarely drank, preferring to experience life exactly as it came her way.It was a fear of losing touch with reality, she suspected. Deeply ingrained byyears of watching her mother"s slow, painful spiral into a world of blacknightmares and euphoric delusions. At the moment, however, a little blurringalong the edges of that reality couldn"t hurt.
"A small gla.s.s," she decided aloud. "There"s an open bottle of white in thefridge. Callie left it the last time she came to dinner."
"Gotcha." He shifted his gaze to Grady, who had left bags next to the frontdoor. "What about you, slick? I"m pouring, in case you"re interested."
"Maybe later."
Flynn nodded. "One small white winecomin " up for the lady," he said beforeheading toward the kitchen, which was at the other end of the long, narrowliving room.
"Sorry we"re later than I figured," Grady said when they were alone. "Took mea while to get the truck out of long-term parking. Some joker had stolen mybattery."
Her smile trembled before she compressed her lips. "It"s okay. Flynn kept mecompany. I don"t know what I would have done without him."
"Yeah, he"s a real thoughtful guy, my brother. He always sends hisgirlfriends flowers before he dumps "em." He rolled his shoulders, thenglanced around, more instinct than curiosity, she suspected.
His rough-hewn textures were the same as before-the chiseled-from-stone jaw,the arrogant cheekbones, the aggressive mouth with the subtle hint ofsensuality few woman could resist. The blatant, in-your-face masculinity wasthe same, too. As fiercely powerful as it had ever been on that sun-washedautumn day when he"d first leveled that beautifully intense gaze in herdirection. Yet he was different, too, she realized as his mouth slanted into abrief half smile.
His thick sun-streaked hair with the unruly waves that taxed the skills ofeven the most skillful barber was now dusted with silver at the temples. Thefaint worry lines above the strong bridge of his nose had deepened topermanent creases. Beneath the c.o.c.ky sweep of this brows, the nut-brown eyesthat had once twinkled with irresistible mischief were somber, even guarded,with hints of bitterness and an inward-turning anger in the dark pupils. Itwas the face of a man who had suffered, and suffered deeply.
"Are you okay?" he asked gruffly after bringing his gaze back to her face.
"A little dazed by the suddenness of this all," she admitted. "But it"s agood feeling." She laughed a little and hugged herself. "No, it"s agreatfeeling." She took a stuttering breath. "Oh, Grady, he"s so beautiful, isn"the? And so tall. Of course, we knew he"d be above average in height, even withmy shrimp size pulling down the mean." She laughed, again, then sobered asFlynn"s gentle warning replayed in her mind. "He really doesn"t remember us?"
"Doesn"t seem to." Grady directed a quick look toward the hall. "He"sscared,Ree . He"ll be more relaxed tomorrow."
"It"ll take time, I know that. But we have that now, thank G.o.d."
"Yeah, thank G.o.d."
He lifted a hand to rub at a spot on his belly just above the waistband ofhis low-slung jeans. Beneath the soft cotton of a dark blue T-shirt, his bodywas still impressively conditioned. A virile, attractive man in his prime. Fora moment she forgot she no longer loved him.
"He"s pretty whipped," he said, dropping his hand to his side. "A storm overthe Rockies made us late into O"Hare and we had to run for it to make the flight to Indianapolis. Otherwise I would have called you from Chicago. Givenyou more notice."
"Why didn"t you call before you left California?" It was one of the questionsthat had been nagging at her since she"d heard his voice on the machine.
"I figured it would be easier on you if you only had to obsess for a coupleof hours instead of five or six. More, if we got hung up or had a flightcanceled."
"I don"t-" She broke off to smile ruefully. "I suppose you"re right," sheadmitted, darting a glance in the direction of the hall. "What"s keeping thatchild, anyway?"
"Want me to check on him?"
"No." She frowned. "Give him another minute or so."
He nodded, then stifled a yawn. "Sorry about that. I"ve been bunking on acouch belonging to the DEA agent who scared up the lead. d.a.m.n near wrecked myback. I was working up an excuse for moving to a motel when the okay camethrough from Children"s Services to release Jimmy in my custody. Three nightsof that torture was about all I could handle."
Grady knew he"d blown it even before her face went still and her eyesclouded. Just when he"d begun to think they could get through a conversationwithout cutting at each other, he"d screwed up.
"Threenights?" Her voice was deceptively casual. "When,exactly, did you findout about Jimmy?"
He had a feeling he wasn"t going to enjoy the next few minutes worth a d.a.m.n."Late Monday afternoon."
She reflected, then narrowed her gaze. "Let me get this straight. You"resaying you deliberately kept my son from me forthree days?"
"Ourson. And there were reasons,Ree . Good reasons."
"What kind of reason could possibly justify that kind of cruelty?" shechallenged in a low, angry voice that had Flynn stopping dead in his trackshalfway across the living room, a gla.s.s of wine in each hand. A quick warningglance from Grady had him retreating to the kitchen without a word.
"You can rip at me all you want when we"re alone, but right now our sondoesn"t need any more uproar in his life," Grady said when they were aloneagain.
"You"re right. What matters now is the welfare of our son and-" She heard thebathroom door open, and broke off.
Side by side, yet anything but united, they watched the child they"d createdin an explosion of mutual pleasure edge into the room.Ria gave a little cry ofalarm when she saw the boy"s face. He wasn"t just pale. He was green. Drops ofsweat as large as tears stood out on his forehead.