"Why is your face so clouded, Miss Annie?" he asked. "You are not given to Mrs. Tuggar"s style of "solemn joy"?"
"What a perplexing mystery life is after all!" she replied, absently.
"I really think poor old Daddy Tuggar speaks truly. He is a "well-meaning" man, but he and many others remind me of one not having the slightest ear for music trying to catch a difficult harmony."
"Why is the harmony so difficult?" asked Gregory, bitterly.
"Perhaps it were better to ask, Why has humanity so disabled itself?"
"I do not think it matters much how you put the case. It amounts to the same thing. Something is required of us beyond our strength. The idea of punishing that old man for being what he is, when in the first place he inherited evil from his parents, and then was taught it by precept and example. I think he deserves more credit than blame."
"The trouble is, Mr. Gregory, evil carries its own punishment along with it every day. But I admit that we are surrounded by mystery on every side. Humanity, left to itself, is a hopeless problem. But one thing is certain: we are not responsible for questions beyond our ken.
Moreover, many things that were complete mysteries to me as a child are now plain, and I ever hope to be taught something new every day. You and I at least have much to be grateful for in the fact that we neither inherited evil nor were taught it in any such degree as our poor neighbor."
"And you quietly prove, Miss Walton, by your last remark, that I am much more worthy of blame than your poor old neighbor."
"Then I said more than I meant," she answered, eagerly. "It is not for me to judge or condemn any one. The thought in my mind was how favored we have been in our parentage--our start in existence, as it were."
"But suppose one loses that vantage-ground?"
"I do not wish to suppose anything of the kind."
"But one can lose it utterly."
"I fear some can and do. But why dwell on a subject so unutterably sad and painful? You have not lost it, and, as I said before to-day, I will not dwell upon the disagreeable any more than I can help."
"Your opinion of me is poor enough already, Miss Walton, so I, too, will drop the subject."
They had now reached the house, and did ample justice to the supper awaiting them.
Between meals people can be very sentimental, morbid, and tragical.
They can stare at life"s deep mysteries and shudder or scoff, sigh or rejoice, according to their moral conditions. They can even grow cold with dread, as did Gregory, realizing that he had "lost his vantage-ground," his good start in the endless career. "She is steering across unknown seas to a peaceful, happy sh.o.r.e. I am drifting on those same mysterious waters I know not whither," he thought. But a few minutes after entering the cheerfully lighted dining-room he was giving his whole soul to m.u.f.fins.
These homely and ever-recurring duties and pleasures of life have no doubt saved mult.i.tudes from madness. It would almost seem that they have also been the innocent cause of the destruction of many. There are times when the mind is almost evenly balanced between good and evil.
Some powerful appeal or startling providence has aroused the sleeping spirit, or some vivifying truth has pierced the armor of indifference or prejudice, and quivered like an arrow in the soul, and the man remembers that he is a man, and not a brute that perishes. But just then the dinner-bell sounds. After the several courses, any physician can predict how the powers of that human organization must of necessity be employed the next few hours, and the partially awakened soul is like one who starts out of a doze and sleeps again. If the spiritual nature had only become sufficiently aroused to realize the situation, _life_ might have been secured. Thought and feeling in some emergencies will do more than the grandest pulpit eloquence quenched by a Sunday dinner.
CHAPTER XV
MISS WALTON"S DREAM
The hickory fire burned cheerily in the parlor after tea, and all drew gladly around its welcome blaze. But even the delights of roasting chestnuts from the abundant spoils of the afternoon could not keep the heads of the children from drooping early.
Gregory was greatly fatigued, and soon went to his room also.
Sabbath morning dawned dim and uncertain, and by the time they had gathered at the breakfast-table, a northeast rain-storm had set in with a driving gale.
"I suppose you will go to church "in sperit" this morning, as Mr.
Tuggar would say," said Gregory, addressing Annie.
"If I were on the sick list I should, but I have no such excuse."
"You seriously do not mean to ride two miles in such a storm as this?"
"No, not seriously, but very cheerfully and gladly."
"I do not think it is required of you, Miss Walton. Even your Bible states, "I will have mercy and not sacrifice.""
"The "sacrifice" in my case would be in staying at home. I like to be out in a storm, and have plenty of warm blood to resist its chilling effects. But even were it otherwise, what hardship is there in my wrapping myself up in a waterproof and riding a few miles to a comfortable church? I shall come back with a grand appet.i.te and a double zest for the wood fire."
"But it is not fair on the poor horses. They have no waterproofs or wood fires."
"I think I am not indifferent to the comfort of dumb animals, and though I drive a good deal, father can tell you I am not a "whip." Of all shams the most transparent is this tenderness for one"s self and the horses on Sunday. I am often out in stormy weather during the week, and meet plenty of people on the road. The farmers drive to the village on rainy days because they can neither plow, sow, nor reap. But on even a cloudy Sabbath, with the faintest prospect of rain, there is but one text in the Bible for them: "A righteous man regardeth the life of his beast." People attend parties, the opera, and places of amus.e.m.e.nt no matter how bad the night. It is a miserable pretence to say that the weather keeps the majority at home from church. It is only an excuse. I should have a great deal more respect for them if they would say frankly, "We would rather sleep, read a novel, dawdle around _en deshabille_, and gossip." Half the time when they say it"s too stormy to venture out (oh, the heroism of our Christian age!), they should go and thank G.o.d for the rain that is providing food for them and theirs.
"And granting that our Christian duties do involve some risk and hardship, does not the Bible ever speak of life as a warfare, a struggle, an agonizing for success? Do not armies often fight and march in the rain, and dumb beasts share their exposure? There is more at stake in this battle. In ancient times G.o.d commanded the b.l.o.o.d.y sacrifice of innumerable animals for the sake of moral and religious effect. Moral and religious effect is worth just as much now. Nothing can excuse wanton cruelty; but the soldier who spurs his horse against the enemy, and the sentinel who keeps his out in a winter storm, are not cruel. But many farmers about here will overwork and underfeed all the week, and on Sunday talk about being "merciful to their beasts."
There won"t be over twenty-five out to-day, and the Christian heroes, the st.u.r.dy yeomanry of the church, will be dozing and grumbling in chimney-corners. The languid half-heartedness of the church discourages me more than all the evil in the world."
Miss Walton stated her views in a quiet undertone of indignation, and not so much in answer to Gregory as in protest against a style of action utterly repugnant to her earnest, whole-souled nature. As he saw the young girl"s face light up with the will and purpose to be loyal to a n.o.ble cause, his own aimless, self-pleasing life seemed petty and contemptible indeed, and again he had that painful sense of humiliation which Miss Walton unwittingly caused him; but, as was often his way, he laughed the matter off by saying, "There is no need of my going to-day, for I have had my sermon, and a better one than you will hear. Still, such is the effect of your homily that I am inclined to ask you to take me with you."
Annie"s manner changed instantly, and she smilingly answered, "You will find an arm-chair before a blazing fire in your room upstairs, and an arm-chair before a blazing fire in the parlor, and you can vacillate between them at your pleasure."
"As a vacillating man should, perhaps you might add."
"I add nothing of the kind."
"Will you never let me go to church with you again?"
"Certainly, after what you said, any pleasant day."
"Why can"t I have the privilege of being a martyr as well as yourself?"
"I am not a martyr. I would far rather go out to-day than stay at home."
"It will be very lonely without you."
"Oh, you are the martyr then, after all. I hope you will have sufficient fort.i.tude to endure, and doze comfortably during the two hours of my absence."
"Now you are satirical on Sunday, Miss Walton. Let that burden your conscience. I"m going to ask your father if I may go."
"Of course you will act at your pleasure," said Mr. Walton, "but I think, in your present state of health, Annie has suggested the wiser and safer thing to do."
"I should probably be ill on your hands if I went, so I submit; but I wish you to take note, Miss Walton, that I have the "sperit to go.""
The arm-chairs were cosey and comfortable, and the hickory wood turned, as is its wont, into glowing and fragrant coals, but the house grew chill and empty the moment that Annie left. Though Mr. Walton and Miss Eulie accompanied her, their absence was rather welcome, but he felt sure that Annie could have beguiled the heavy-footed hours.
"She has some unexplained power of making me forget my miserable self,"